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THE DAILY ASTORIAN • FRIDAY, ApRIL 5, 2019
Hostage to constant talkers
Dear Annie: How do you
Dear Tired Ears: Any rela-
politely handle “the talkers”? tionship or encounter we have
There seem to be a lot of them out with people should be a two-
there — you know, friends, peo- way street. If you leave feeling
ple you meet at gatherings, etc., drained after having talked with
who talk nonstop and
a friend, then perhaps it’s
DEAR
hardly allow you the time
time to find a new friend
ANNIE
to say anything. Conver-
— especially if you have
sation should be a two-
been upfront with your
way street, not a mono-
friend and your com-
logue, but they don’t
ments have landed on
seem to get it.
deaf ears.
For example, some-
Also, be aware of
one will talk on and on
whether you are listen-
about a trip he took or ANNIE LANE ing to the talkers’ stories.
Creators
Much of the time, we
will take, and yes, that
Syndicate Inc.
don’t listen to the other
is interesting to me, but
person because we are
I’d like to mention my
trip, too, and he never comes up waiting to speak ourselves — the
for air. Whatever I might have to very thing you are addressing in
say is of no interest to these talk- your letter.
ers. When they pause, I am able
With a stranger or someone
to actually get a sentence in, but you don’t know, you can always
after they hear it, they just con- politely interrupt him or her and
tinue on with their monologue exit the situation.
without commenting.
Unfortunately, there could be
All this listening on my part a medical reason for why your
is exhausting. I feel like a cap- chatterbox friend can’t stop.
tive audience. So now I just don’t Compulsive talking could be a
socialize as much. I have told a sign of attention deficit hyperac-
friend she talks too much, but she tivity disorder or anxiety. With
just laughed, as if it were cute or that in mind, if the person is a
something. But with a stranger or really good friend, perhaps she
someone I don’t know well, what is having a tough time and needs
your friendship, but be firm in
should I say? — Tired Ears
insisting that for your friendship
to continue, your conversations
must include both of you.
Dear Annie: Your reply to
“Hurt, Frustrated and Appalled in
Florida,” the woman whose hus-
band agreed to host his daugh-
ter’s wedding at their house, did
address the lack of communica-
tion and issues with his children.
However, reading between the
lines, I think this woman is afraid
of having all those strangers in
her home. A few suggestions
might ease her mind. Remove
items that might easily get bro-
ken or are valuables to an off-lim-
its bedroom. Remove all medica-
tion and personal items from the
bathrooms.
She should remember that
this is a small wedding, with 65
guests. Probably only close fam-
ily and friends will be invited. A
generous spirit in this wedding
process will go a long way toward
improving the family relation-
ships. — Tennessee Reader
Dear Tennessee Reader:
Thank you for sharing your help-
ful hints. You are correct that a
generous spirit will go a long
way, not only during this wed-
ding process but during her entire
lifetime.
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). Balanced is not
the same thing as equal. Strange things can
balance out and often do. You can’t argue
with what works, nor is there any point in
arguing with what doesn’t.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You’re always
making efforts to accommodate. Usually, life
is better if you can swing it. But right now, it’s
just easier when everyone eats the same food
and likes the same kind of entertainment.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You realize what’s
at stake for you, but in order to reach an
agreement, you also have to know what’s
at stake for the other person. You’ll reach
agreement in at least three instances before
the day is done.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). Because you
take business personally and treat people
so well, you’ll reap the benefits of a fulfilling
atmosphere where you spend a good deal of
your time.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). It’s fun to think about
the future so long as you can avoid getting so
caught up in planning and dreaming that you
miss what’s happening right now. What you
have is extremely precious!
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). There’s comfort
in knowing what you can expect. When you
tell people what they are about to experience
and then deliver on that, the reaction will be
extremely favorable.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Take the high road.
You don’t have to take it out of benevolence.
You can take it out of utility, just because it’s
the way most likely to solve the problem, and
take the benevolence points as a bonus.
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). The time to set
a goal for a conversation is before you have
it. It may help to write down your goals and
questions because it’s a lot harder to recall
this reasonable part of the brain when face
to face.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). There are
so many wonderful things about your current
position, most of them so common to you
that you can’t really see them. It’s why the
perspective of strangers is so valuable to you
now.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). You’ll be evan-
gelizing for a cause that will make the world
better. Ignore the nonbelievers. You’ll gain real
numbers and momentum with those who are
on the fence, just waiting to be convinced.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). All the kin-
dergarten rules apply, and those much older
will avoid all sorts of mayhem from applying
the basics like “eyes on your own page” and
“hands to yourself.”
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Remember when
you made that commitment when you really
don’t know much about it? Now you know.
Future commitments are harder to make from
this wizened position.
TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (April 6). The cele-
bration of your birth won’t be just a day. It will
be ongoing, sporadic and surprising, the way
the cosmic forces seem to gift you through
this solar return. One of the gifts comes in the
form of people who really get you and get
behind what you do. Another is the environ-
ment that better supports you. Aquarius and
Gemini adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 8,
30, 1, 19 and 10.