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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Nov. 21, 2018)
6A FEATURES Tough love is necessary Dear Annie: Over the past with all the assistance you’ve year, I’ve discovered that there offered, sometimes the best are some people in this world way to help a loved one is not who are OK with “just getting to — or at least not in hands-on by” with what is available — ways. Set emotional and finan- including leaning on or using cial boundaries. Don’t do the what another person under the job hunting for this person. Don’t give him or her same roof has. DEAR How does one any more money unless inspire another to get a you’ve got a financial ANNIE job and thus the money safety net for your- self, you really want and things needed for to give the money and life? I have supported the you truly believe that one under my roof with it will ultimately serve encouraging words and this person well in the actions, such as pro- long run. Lane viding transportation Annie Even more impor- Creators Syndicate Inc. tantly, make sure and giving information you’re not neglecting about job openings. I know that when you’re a rel- your own health, hobbies or ative, you need to give tough friendships. In short, take care love, but what makes a person of yourself and let the person who doesn’t have any drive under your roof learn to take become independent? care of himself or herself. Is there anything more I Dear Annie: My stepdaugh- could say or do for this per- ter just passed away after a son? — Big Heart but Empty lengthy battle with cancer. Her Pockets mom was still in her life, and I Dear Big Heart but Empty had been a part of her life for 14 Pockets: As long as you con- years. We had a very good rela- tinue to act as a crutch for this tionship and spent lots of qual- person, he or she will continue ity time with her and her family. What has been upsetting is to lean on you. Though your big heart is in the right place that the condolence cards are THE DAILY ASTORIAN • WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 21, 2018 TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. being sent to my husband only. I am left out. I understand she was not “my daughter,” but I am also grieving her loss and feel I should be included. Am I wrong? I hope others will read this and include the stepfamily, as well, when sending condo- lences. — Left Out Dear Left Out: No, you are not wrong for feeling hurt. She was your family, too. I hope your letter encourages others to be inclusive of all family during the grieving process. Dear Annie: Thank you so much for printing the let- ter from “Be Kind,” who wrote about not shaming older trick- or-treaters. We have several friends who are foster parents. They take in many children who haven’t ever gone trick- or-treating. Some are young, and some are old. As was mentioned, you never know, so please be kind. To quote a friend of mine, “I’d rather have teens trick-or-treating than getting into trouble anyway.” — Bridget Dear Bridget: I totally agree. There’s never harm in erring on the side of kindness. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Enjoyment and gratitude go hand in hand. Seeing someone truly enjoy a thing can be far more meaningful and satisfying than taking part in the formali- ties around saying “thank you.” TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You have mantras whether you know it or not. Distract yourself from repeating unhelpful thoughts by consciously feeding yourself something better. This seeds an all-around joyful — and infectious! — attitude. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You have heard the call of a certain dream, but you’re just not sure how to answer it. One way to give credence to your dreams is to share them. The smallest passing mention between loved ones can start something rolling. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). When you talk to an elder, you’re talking to all the ages that person has been, and you can connect with any of them just by aiming your conversation well. The older generation will light the path to treasures of the soul. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Take a deep breath in and know that you don’t have to be anyone other than who you are. You are accepted and loved no matter how hard you do or don’t try. So just relax and enjoy yourself. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). When things are still uncertain, be certain anyway. You’ll be the rock, the idea person who saves the day with a wink and a smile. You’re not doing it to be a hero, it just turns out that way. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Before you attempt to make anyone happy (including yourself) note that our appetites often have nothing to do with what’s really good for us. Happiness is wanting what you already have. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You’re beyond capable and could conceivably do most, if not all, of today’s work on your own. But why? Sharing the work is even more fun than sharing the play. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Trying new things puts you in a fun mood. It doesn’t even matter how well they turn out. All the fun is in the way your senses wake up when you’re doing something for the first time. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). You’re not about to let formalities get in the way of forming bonds. Fussy extras are only fun if they don’t distract from the main goal, which is to foster a sense of belonging between all who gather with you. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You’ll get several assists today from those around you, people behind the scenes, even those at a distance or in other realms. It’s like you’re a universal favorite and everyone wants to make things a little easier for you. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Serving tradition will be just as satisfying as breaking it, so no matter which way you go, you can’t go wrong. Why not try to do a little of both? Also the more inclusive you are, the better you’ll feel. FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE TODAY’S BIRTHDAY (Nov. 22). Whatever you do, you aim it to be for the benefit of others. This spirit of kinship serves you well, bringing out your most useful talents. High- lights of the solar return include the confi- dence of a crew that matters much to you, a rocket-fast journey and a series of trades that gives you a financial win. Libra and Scorpio adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 5, 26, 11, 28 and 30.
