6A
FEATURES
Tough love is necessary
Dear Annie: Over the past with all the assistance you’ve
year, I’ve discovered that there offered, sometimes the best
are some people in this world way to help a loved one is not
who are OK with “just getting to — or at least not in hands-on
by” with what is available — ways. Set emotional and finan-
including leaning on or using cial boundaries. Don’t do the
what another person under the job hunting for this person.
Don’t give him or her
same roof has.
DEAR
How does one
any more money unless
inspire another to get a
you’ve got a financial
ANNIE
job and thus the money
safety net for your-
self, you really want
and things needed for
to give the money and
life?
I have supported the
you truly believe that
one under my roof with
it will ultimately serve
encouraging words and
this person well in the
actions, such as pro-
long run.
Lane
viding transportation Annie
Even more impor-
Creators
Syndicate Inc.
tantly, make sure
and giving information
you’re not neglecting
about job openings. I
know that when you’re a rel- your own health, hobbies or
ative, you need to give tough friendships. In short, take care
love, but what makes a person of yourself and let the person
who doesn’t have any drive under your roof learn to take
become independent?
care of himself or herself.
Is there anything more I
Dear Annie: My stepdaugh-
could say or do for this per- ter just passed away after a
son? — Big Heart but Empty lengthy battle with cancer. Her
Pockets
mom was still in her life, and I
Dear Big Heart but Empty had been a part of her life for 14
Pockets: As long as you con- years. We had a very good rela-
tinue to act as a crutch for this tionship and spent lots of qual-
person, he or she will continue ity time with her and her family.
What has been upsetting is
to lean on you. Though your
big heart is in the right place that the condolence cards are
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 21, 2018
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
being sent to my husband only.
I am left out. I understand she
was not “my daughter,” but I
am also grieving her loss and
feel I should be included. Am
I wrong?
I hope others will read this
and include the stepfamily, as
well, when sending condo-
lences. — Left Out
Dear Left Out: No, you are
not wrong for feeling hurt. She
was your family, too. I hope
your letter encourages others
to be inclusive of all family
during the grieving process.
Dear Annie: Thank you
so much for printing the let-
ter from “Be Kind,” who wrote
about not shaming older trick-
or-treaters. We have several
friends who are foster parents.
They take in many children
who haven’t ever gone trick-
or-treating. Some are young,
and some are old. As was
mentioned, you never know,
so please be kind. To quote a
friend of mine, “I’d rather have
teens trick-or-treating than
getting into trouble anyway.”
— Bridget
Dear Bridget: I totally
agree. There’s never harm in
erring on the side of kindness.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). Enjoyment and
gratitude go hand in hand. Seeing someone
truly enjoy a thing can be far more meaningful
and satisfying than taking part in the formali-
ties around saying “thank you.”
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You have
mantras whether you know it or not. Distract
yourself from repeating unhelpful thoughts
by consciously feeding yourself something
better. This seeds an all-around joyful — and
infectious! — attitude.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You have heard
the call of a certain dream, but you’re just
not sure how to answer it. One way to give
credence to your dreams is to share them.
The smallest passing mention between loved
ones can start something rolling.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). When you talk
to an elder, you’re talking to all the ages that
person has been, and you can connect with
any of them just by aiming your conversation
well. The older generation will light the path to
treasures of the soul.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Take a
deep breath in and know that you don’t have
to be anyone other than who you are. You
are accepted and loved no matter how hard
you do or don’t try. So just relax and enjoy
yourself.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). When things
are still uncertain, be certain anyway. You’ll be
the rock, the idea person who saves the day
with a wink and a smile. You’re not doing it to
be a hero, it just turns out that way.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). Before you
attempt to make anyone happy (including
yourself) note that our appetites often have
nothing to do with what’s really good for us.
Happiness is wanting what you already have.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You’re beyond
capable and could conceivably do most,
if not all, of today’s work on your own. But
why? Sharing the work is even more fun than
sharing the play.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Trying new things
puts you in a fun mood. It doesn’t even matter
how well they turn out. All the fun is in the
way your senses wake up when you’re doing
something for the first time.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). You’re not about
to let formalities get in the way of forming
bonds. Fussy extras are only fun if they don’t
distract from the main goal, which is to foster
a sense of belonging between all who gather
with you.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You’ll get several
assists today from those around you, people
behind the scenes, even those at a distance
or in other realms. It’s like you’re a universal
favorite and everyone wants to make things a
little easier for you.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Serving tradition
will be just as satisfying as breaking it, so no
matter which way you go, you can’t go wrong.
Why not try to do a little of both? Also the
more inclusive you are, the better you’ll feel.
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
TODAY’S BIRTHDAY (Nov. 22). Whatever
you do, you aim it to be for the benefit of
others. This spirit of kinship serves you well,
bringing out your most useful talents. High-
lights of the solar return include the confi-
dence of a crew that matters much to you, a
rocket-fast journey and a series of trades that
gives you a financial win. Libra and Scorpio
adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 5, 26, 11,
28 and 30.