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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Nov. 6, 2018)
6A FEATURES TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE Husband doesn’t stand up for her Dear Annie: I am an active A successful watermelon patch member of my small community provided the opportunity to share and have served on many boards, our bounty with neighbors. I asked including as an elected official. my husband to share the limited There are a few community mem- melons with our friends instead of bers who have taken their differ- the hurtful neighbor, as there were ent views on city priorities to a per- not enough for everyone. My hus- band ignored my direct sonal level, and that has set DEAR request and delivered a up the uncomfortable situ- ation of seeing each other melon to this man with a ANNIE at our children’s events and smile. places such as the grocery. The fact that I have One person, a neighbor been betrayed and my feel- ings are being dismissed is of mine, publicly called me dominating my thoughts names that referenced my and impacting our mar- looks and actively spread riage. My husband is inaccurate and toxic infor- Lane mation about me. My hus- Annie defensive anytime I try to Creators Syndicate Inc. band had to call him over bring up the issue. Please a neighborhood issue, and help this 30-year marriage this neighbor disparaged me, think- navigate this. — Going Through a ing my husband was someone else. Rough Patch The confusion was quickly sorted Dear Going Through a Rough out, but nothing was ever said about Patch: It is bad politics — but very the personal attack on me. My hus- common these days — when issues band did not want to confront the devolve into personal attacks. neighbor, and although I wish he You could just as easily have would have made a statement of defended yourself to your neighbor, support for me, I supported his and you should feel free to do so — decision. politely. But the real issue is your I was able to keep the hurtful husband and his lack of support for behavior directed at me compart- you. It is not so much that he gave mentalized until my husband disre- your neighbor a melon (a nice thing garded my request of limited con- to do); it is that this was the man tact with the neighbor. who attacked you personally. Tell your husband how you feel. Ask him why he would give a man who was so hurtful to his wife a melon with a smile. It could be that he resents your involvement with politics or that he hates conflict and simply wants to be a good neighbor. Only he can tell you the answer. Dear Annie: This is in response to the letters from “Shy” and “For- ever Grateful.” Bystanders who step up and do something in response to seeing someone being bullied are called upstanders. People who don’t feel comfortable standing up to bullies or even reaching out to bullied people because they’re shy can go to a trusted adult and explain that they have observed bully- ing and are concerned for the per- son who is being targeted. Tipping off a teacher or aide enables some- one in charge to observe the bully- ing and intervene. Most school per- sonnel have received some training around the issue of bullying and are aware of how subtle bullying can be. They are likely to respond when an upstander approaches them. — Professor of Health Education Dear Professor: I hadn’t heard the term “upstanders” before; what a great turn of phrase and a great idea. Thanks for sharing your pro- fessional expertise. THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 6, 2018 By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). You won’t regret taking the high road. To extend dignity and peace to another is to extend it to yourself. Doing the right thing is its own reward, but this time it will come with a bonus. attention you give will make you a favorite among your people. Not only do you acknowl- edge others when they speak, you also extend an appreciation for the personal risk-taking that may be involved. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). It’s not like you consciously pick and choose which “you” to be. The right version of you just emerges unbidden to handle the situation. Too much interference by your conscious mind can only slow you down. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Take full advantage of this world before rushing to explore the next one. You’ll get there soon enough. And when you do, you’ll probably look back and count today as being among “the good ole days.” GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Just because you lower your pride doesn’t mean you’re signaling defeat. This may be an act of deference, respect or strategy. Humility takes strength. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Can you ar- range your schedule so that you can catch the sunset? The magical time just before the sky falls asleep will bring a benefit to your psyche and may even make your dreams sweeter. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Gather experi- ence. Repetition of the same task is experi- ence, too, but it’s not going to grow you like facing the unknown. You’ll learn more about yourself in the face of fresh experience than you would through introspection. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Beware of people who act like they’ve got it all figured out. Perhaps they really have sorted through a small section of life, and you can learn from them in that regard. But that’s not true for every regard. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You are ardent in your affections. You will express yourself in an open, confident manner and with great warmth and heart. Loved ones will feel lucky to be on the receiving end of your generosity. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Brilliance! Forceful- ness! Courage in action! After you give yourself a moment to soak in your victory, rest. That’s the step not to skip. If you keep going full tilt without a rest, you’ll risk a setback. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). The quality of FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Something changes to set the usual dynamics of a close relationship a little off-kilter. This is a move toward improvement though it may not seem like it right away. You’ll avoid stagnation. All is working to your benefit. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). A handwritten letter was once the prevailing method of communicating on matters of news, love, gratitude and intention. Now it’s a rarity, which is why, if you write someone a note, it will be a cherished memento. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Nov. 7). Your heart is soft; your mind is sharp. You’ll push for a change that could transform your whole scene, and it will. Go forward with your plan regardless of popular opinion. (There are some people you shouldn’t even give the chance to weigh in.) Also in 2019: high expectations met, love, loyalty and professional advancement. Pi- sces and Aries adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 50, 44, 20, 4 and 11.
