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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Oct. 5, 2018)
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • FRIDAY, OCTOBER 5, 2018 FEATURES TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE Husband’s past is embarrassing Dear Annie: My husband and Another Annie I are alcoholics in recovery with Dear Another Annie: I think multiple years of sobriety. We are that going to different meetings in our 60s. When my husband was would be wise. It would allow 17, he committed an act of vio- each of you space to focus totally lence that resulted in imprison- on your own recovery, with- ment. This act was in retaliation to out filtering it through the lens of your marriage. You someone who snitched on DEAR might also benefit from him for drug dealing. My husband regularly attending Al-Anon meet- ANNIE ings, in addition to Alco- talks about this part of his holics Anonymous, to life in AA meetings. I am help sort through some very embarrassed by this. additional baggage you I’ve talked to him about may not even be aware how this makes me feel, you’ve been carrying. but he says it’s part of his (I’ve heard good things story. I can understand Lane about SMART Recovery that in some situations, Annie Creators Syndicate Inc. and LifeRing, which also his disclosure of his past offer support for the loved would help people, such as men who are currently incar- ones of people with alcoholism.) cerated. In conversations between Congratulations on your years of the two of us, my husband will sobriety. refer to his prison life with what Dear Annie: The advice you seems like fond remembrance. gave to “Faithful in New Mex- ico,” the poor soul who has been This bothers me very much. Am I being selfish and con- in and out of the hospital and is trolling in wanting him to stop now home recovering, was far off talking about his prison life? I base. Her husband was ascended know that I cannot control him, upon by two women wanting to but I wish he could just talk “console” him during his wife’s about his recovery. I’m thinking health crisis. You said she should about going to different meetings take solace in the fact that her hus- so I won’t have to listen to him. band was honest with her and he Is that the best thing to do? — was furious that these women were so forward. First off, he told his wife that she did not know these women. How does he know them? Why would he be pouring his heart out to other women about his wife, her health issues and the decline of their family home situation? Because he’s guilty! The rea- son he confessed to his wife was to make himself feel better. He either did act, wanted to or will. If it meant nothing, why tell her? He should have kept his mouth shut or told his wife who these women are. The fact that he is talking to these women about himself and his wife is a sure sign of guilt. Maybe it has not gone further, but it will in time. I’m very independent. I was married at 37, had cancer at 48, had surgery and did treatments. My husband was “consoled.” How far he took it, I have no idea. He never breathed a word. I heard from another source. — D.P. Dear D.P.: I’m so sorry that happened to you. You’re right that sometimes when partners bring up such things, it’s out of guilt. I hope that wasn’t the case for “Faith- ful in New Mexico” and her hus- band, but I’m printing your letter because it’s an astute point. 3C By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). In school, we study for the tests to get the grade. Real-life relationships aren’t forged in tests. We make the grade through routine pleasant interactions. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Games, awards or some kind of competition is featured. If you win, be gracious and brief. If you lose, the same applies. Either way, you’re likely to win a friend, acquaintance or at the very least, a new contact. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Most people will go wide; you should go deep. Do the best you can do at the thing you do the best and you’ll be sprinting past the rest, making a name for yourself, carving out your unique niche. CANCER (June 22-July 22). You’ll be mak- ing things and presenting things. Perfection isn’t the point. Take a step back. What matters about this? What will people’s take away likely be? Speak to that. Any attempts at perfection are misguided. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). It’s not about going slow, it’s about creating a sustainable rhythm you can carry out time and time again, a steady march that will get you across the regions to where you want to be. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). It’s not always as easy as it seems to figure out what you really want and need because it’s different for every person. To see yourself and your needs more accurately is the start to attract- ing more desirable circumstances. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). You have charis- ma to spare. The challenge is in directing it well and handling the attention that comes with it. Which is the most appealing choice. FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE Which is the kindest? SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). What you’re making isn’t for everyone, so don’t concern yourself with what everyone thinks about it. Cater your efforts specifically to the people for whom they will matter. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). The way to happiness will be very simple. Find what matters to you and get deeper into it. Learn it well, do it often, take your understanding and appreciation of it to the highest level you can. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Love doesn’t always feel like love because it takes on so many forms. Some of the forms, for instance, the more truthful ones, can sting a little but you’ll still find them very worthwhile. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Informal gatherings will be part of the fun. The conversation will be interesting, the food de- licious. Plus, it will be satisfying to know that you can charm people just by being you. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Let someone take care of you. You don’t have to be needy to do this, of course. People take care of one another in many different ways. Accepting a little help or tenderness is as good for the relationship as giving it is. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Oct. 6). You will claim a fulfilling sense of community in the months to come, involving yourself in scenes that fit nicely with your world view, in- terests and with what you have to contribute. Other highlights include a renovation of your domestic digs, a project that gets funded and being a major part of a loved one’s advancement. Leo and Aries adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 9, 33, 31, 2 and 17.
