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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Dec. 7, 2017)
6A FEATURES Friend won’t help himself Dear Annie: I’m at my wits’ supportive thing at first — build- end dealing with my friend’s ing up his self-esteem, encour- glum, woe-is-me attitude. I’ve aging him to try therapy, helping known “Max” since we worked him research schools, offering to together at a restaurant when I help get him a restaurant job in was in college. He was in his New York, etc. After a couple of years, I real- early 20s and had grown up in the ized he wouldn’t act on town. He said he regret- DEAR ted not getting a bach- any of this, so I stopped elor’s degree. As we offering solutions and ANNIE became better friends have just shown tough and he saw the projects I love. For example, when was doing for my classes he complains about how (I was an art major), he none of his friends calls became inspired and to hang out, I tell him started making plans to that he can’t expect peo- ple to always be think- go to community college Lane ing of him. But nothing and then transfer. A year Annie Creators Syndicate Inc. seems to get through to passed; then two. That him. never happened. (Not a Max never asks about what’s big deal in itself, but I mention it up in my life, and when I try to tell as part of a pattern.) Six years ago, I graduated and him, somehow he finds a way of got a job in New York. Max and I bringing the conversation back to have stayed in touch, and he vis- him. I’m starting to feel used and its about once a year. He’s still in a little resentful, if you couldn’t the same town, working at a dif- tell. I care about Max and think ferent restaurant. I don’t say that he’s a good guy. But how can you judgmentally. I don’t think there’s help someone who doesn’t really anything wrong with it. The prob- want to help himself? — Eeyore’s lem is that Max does. He’s been Friend talking about wanting to change Dear Eeyore’s Friend: You his life for years now, but he takes can’t. At this point, the kindest no steps to do so. I’ve tried every thing you can do for Max is to approach I can think of. I did the refuse to be his dumping ground any longer. Only after he’s got nowhere to unload will he be forced to confront the weight of his problem. A therapist could most likely help him a great deal, and you can encourage him to seek counseling one more time — but disengage and take space after that. Your friendship with Max can only be healthy after he’s purged that toxic mindset. Dear Annie: I enjoy your col- umn, and you have great advice. In the case of the “bad” milk, though, not so much. Spoiled milk tastes bad but doesn’t make you sick. Sour cream, yogurt, cheese and other dairy products are made from spoiled milk. I have never thrown away milk. “Bad” milk makes the best pancakes, biscuits, banana bread, coffee cake, muffins and more. If I’m not able to use the spoiled milk right away, I freeze it in small containers for later use. I use it whenever a baking recipe calls for buttermilk. I couldn’t bake without it! — Never Wasteful Dear Never Wasteful: You make a great point that I failed to bring up. Milk can be used in baked goods after it’s no longer good to drink. Waste not, want not. THE DAILY ASTORIAN • THURSDAY, DECEMBER 7, 2017 TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Q: Who tries things a thousand unsuccessful ways before getting one winner? A: Winners. You’re attempt- ing something that’s not guaranteed, and easy results are not a part of this endeavor, but keep going anyway. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). The aim is to make decisions based on your vision for your life, not the moment-to-moment minutiae of moods. This is made much easier when it’s a strong, juicy vision. You’ll work on that today. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Some will be very aware of rank and order and who’s coming in first place and last place, etc., but you can be assured that your gut feeling on the matter is 100 percent correct: It’s not about all that. It’s about the work. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Though you’ll be tempted to take on a task that is as challenging as it is ridiculous, consider this wise saying first: Don’t teach a pig to sing; it frustrates you and annoys the pig. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Even though you’re the cat of the zodiac — i.e., the top predator and, it follows, king of the jungle — you have a merciful side. That’s what will come into play today as you walk out of your house more the shepherd than the lion. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Everyone has a secret — something to remember when you’re bored with social interactions. Persist. Guar- anteed, there is something interesting to know here if you hang in and pay attention. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Though it’s not wise to measure your progress by someone else’s standards, it’s also the way the world works, more or less, in the practical order of things. Think about what they’ll be judging, and gear FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE up for it. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Are you getting the feeling that the perfectly right moment you’re waiting for is never going to happen? Well, you’re right about that. It’s information that could also be your golden ticket to move forward regardless. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Since you have baggage around being socially accepted today, you can act out (without trying, because it’s just who you are), and you can enjoy the way it pushes everyone’s boundaries, including your own. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). To notice then react — this is how an awake world oper- ates. To notice and not react — well, that’s the usual. You’re different. Prove it today. There’s a lot at stake, actually. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You’re not so worried about becoming something these days. It’s more about un-becoming those things that were imposed on you. Things that served other people’s interests, not yours. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). You’ve mined the gold in your mistakes before, but this vein is deeper than you imagined. It’s a good time to look back and consider how you might have done it differently, and how you’ll do it next time. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Dec. 8). You don’t shy away from goals just because they push you into uncomfortable territory. You know what’s worth doing, and that will be the guiding principle of this solar return. There’s a favorable change in February bonding you with another. You’ll continue along a path of beautiful vistas and beatific scenery. Cancer and Virgo adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 6, 3, 8, 38 and 4.
