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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Nov. 30, 2017)
14 // COASTWEEKEND.COM Coast Weekend’s local restaurant review At Long Beach Tavern, food and setting are well-worn served late. After most of Long Beach shuts down, the LBT is still cooking. In addition to the usual MOUTH@COASTWEEKEND.COM FACEBOOK.COM/MOUTHOFTHECOLUMBIA dive necessities — prepressed, fro- zen burger patties, fries and tots, esides the flat-screen TVs chicken strips and wings — there’s and the locally brewed IPAs pizza and a slew of daily specials, on tap, there is little inside like taco Tuesday (two tacos for the Long Beach Tavern to assure a buck), wing Wednesday, pasta you that we are indeed in 2017 and Friday and so on. not 1970. I stuck mostly to the regular Part of that is the look, part is menu. And since it was the banner the food. out front touting the LBT’s chow- But before we get to the eats, der taking First Place at the Razor it’s worth setting the scene. Clam Festival that lured me in, I The ceiling is painted black. began with a cup ($6.95, $8.95 for The carpet is dark. The walls are a bowl). wood, and the booths are coated in Tasting it, I was a bit miffed. black vinyl. There’s a fireplace and It was very much akin to the all kinds of vintage beer-marketing indistinct chowder we coasties are paraphernalia. Over classic rock all too familiar with: salty, creamy, or sports you’ll hear pool balls buttery and one-note. There was clacking and regulars jawing. no depth, no developed flavor, And indeed, the Long Beach and the clams were on the gummy Tavern (aka the LBT) is a local side. It felt like a tourist trap. stronghold. Considering the loca- At $9.95 (with chips; fries, tion — smack dab in the tourist onion rings, tots or a salad are center of Long Beach — that’s $2.50 extra), the Halibut Fish saying some- Sandwich was thing. While a squarer value. much of the town Obviously at ‘WHILE MUCH is tourist-first, OF THE TOWN IS that price we’re LBT maintains talking about ma- TOURIST-FIRST, chined, long-fro- working-class LBT MAINTAINS zen, probably roots. Heavy-du- WORKING- ty work pants and pre-breaded fish CLASS ROOTS. steel-toed boots (the same as they might as well be use in the fish HEAVY-DUTY a dress code. and chips). The WORK-PANTS While those sandwich was workers come stacked absurdly, AND after the whistle the center a thin, STEEL-TOED blows and fill up teetering tower BOOTS on big, carb-y of tomatoes, MIGHT AS portions, eating then red onions WELL BE A is an ancillary with pickles DRESS CODE. concern. And, to inside, then the be sure: There thick rectangle are drink deals to of beer-battered be had. Cans of beer start as low halibut, covered with a slice of as $1.75. American cheese. Apart from the Whether you’re up for a can of presentation, which I had to mush Milwaukee’s Best is another ques- down to get in my mouth, there’s tion. But hey: It’s a striking deal, nothing particularly special to especially in a tourist town. mention. Nothing offensive, either. Now, to the food. First, it’s It did the job. Review and photos by THE MOUTH OF THE COLUMBIA B LONG BEACH TAVERN Rating: 305 Pacific Ave. Long Beach, Washington 98631 360-642-3235 Hours: 10 a.m. to 2 a.m. every day Price: $ – some good values, some questionable Service: Local friendly Vegetarian / Vegan Options: Thin Drinks: Full bar KEY TO STAR RATING SYSTEM Poor Below average Worth returning Very good Excellent, best in region Halibut Fish Sandwich Seafood chowder The pizza was passable. The crust was medium-thick and that doughiness was quite filling. There are two tiers of pizza. From the top (“Gourmet”) category, I had The Captain — essentially the classic “combination.” From the sauce to the cheese to the toppings, it was totally forgettable — a horse with no name. It was $25.95 for a 14-inch pie, and I felt a wisp of the tourist economy creeping in again. I did try one daily special, the Turkey Pesto Swiss Avocado Melt with fries Avocado Pesto Turkey Sandwich. It was a lot like a club sandwich, only with two slices of bread and the addition of unremarkable pesto oils. The turkey was deli meat cut paper thin. It had no body. Indeed, of the dishes I tried, if the Halibut Sandwich was the one I’d order again, Avocado Pesto Turkey would be at the end of the line. At the LBT, the food matches the setting: well-worn. CW
