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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Sept. 29, 2017)
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 29, 2017 FEATURES When family doesn’t visit Dear Annie: My husband Dear Annie: My daughter and I are retired. We are in our and I had lunch today at a very 70s, and he is in poor health. He nice pizza cafe we frequent. has cancer. But the problem I’m Three booths away were a cou- writing to you about is that he ple and a boy of about 8 or 9. does not get visits or calls from The woman started to berate the his family on a regular basis child. Apparently, she asked him to get a plate, and the unless he’s in the hos- DEAR plate was too small. She pital. They live in the very loudly screamed, same town as we do. ANNIE “How can you be so When I was younger, stupid to get such a my parents shamed me small plate!” She went into visiting twice a on and on. I walked by month. I didn’t mind, the booth, and both the because it was the right boy and the man were thing to do. How do we staring silently at their approach this problem. Lane plates. The woman Shame them? — Look- Annie Creators Syndicate Inc. continued for at least ing for the Right Words 15 minutes. She told Dear Looking: Don’t play the shame game. Be him she was going to shave his direct. It’s possible his family head! The child began crying. members don’t realize no one’s It was such verbal abuse that I calling or visiting; everyone may couldn’t eat my food. Then the just assume another member of boy yelled, “I don’t even want the family is staying in close to be in this family!” Other din- touch. Tell them how much it ers began to notice. She finally would mean to your husband if left the restaurant, with the man they visited more often and not and the boy trailing behind. only when he’s in the hospital. What must this kid’s life be like They’re not just your husband’s behind closed doors? I wanted family; they’re your family, too. to do something. I wanted to call And we all sometimes need the police; it was so horrible. family to remind us of what’s Should I have spoken to her? — Wish I Were With Child Protec- important. 3C TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. tive Services Dear WIWWCPS: It’s difficult to know what to do when witnessing such situa- tions unfolding. The best course depends on the scenario. If it’s merely an exasperated mom raising her voice at her child in the grocery, try to empathize. Every parent has been there, and in such moments of frustra- tion, support can go much fur- ther than judgment. That might mean offering assistance (car- rying groceries, cleaning up a spill, etc.) or just a sympathetic smile. In more extreme situations, use caution. Experts recommend not confronting the parent your- self if you can avoid it. Instead, seek out a security guard or, in cases of physical abuse, call 911 and try to monitor the situation from a distance until authorities arrive. Take down the license plate number or other relevant information. If you find that you must intervene in the moment to protect the child’s safety, pro- ceed as gingerly as possible and try to be kind to the parent. That may sound counterintuitive, but it’s the best way to de-escalate the situation. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Challenge your- self to leave a situation before you respond to it. Even if you’re only walking away for five minutes, that’s enough time to come up with a better communication than you’d have reflexively. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). You can’t tell what’s going to make other people happy. You can’t even tell what’s going to make you happy. So just do your best. When things don’t land quite right, shrug it off. And when they do, celebrate. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). There are inter- esting people out there you’d like to meet and equally interesting people who want to meet you. Your social efforts will pay off rather quick- ly now, so don’t miss the chance to mingle. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). The lan- guage of souls is hard for you to miss these days. As you listen past what people say out of a sense of social appropriateness, good man- ners or obligation, you hear the soul’s cry. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). The No. 1 rule of the day: Don’t agonize. You’re creative, and to make the most of this you’ll need to make many decisions and execute them fast. Take the lessons and move on — no regrets! CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). It’s not just the supporters around you who are aware of your potential. Those who knock your confi- dence on purpose are also aware. You can take it as a compliment that they see you as competition. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Like a real pro, you are brave without being reckless, focused but not oblivious to the competition. This atti- tude will carry you into an exclusive situation where you’ll meet worthy opponents. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Maybe it won’t do any good to explain yourself. Those who would understand don’t need the explanation and those who don’t only get more confused the more you talk. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). For those waiting for the one day when it will all just click in, you know better. There’s no great light switch to turn on — not one gigantic click, but a ticker tape of small understandings you come to with daily awareness. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Those who are overly concerned with stating their personal truths are often too melodramatic for you to take seriously. Emotionally mature people put kindness, compassion and cooperation first. FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). It’s true that people have stumbled upon treasures like gold, but as for most of the better things in life, they cannot be found; they have to be assembled. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Today, while going about normal business, you’ll often be doing something very different in your head. You’ve a rich inner life. Your private world is only for you — though you may share glimpses with a trusted loved one. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Sept. 30). It’s a year of expanding options. The next three months are especially socially active. You’re a quick study and also quite impressionable, so put yourself around good influences. You’ll win a prize in January. This will be a game-chang- er. The love you share will feel as legendary as the stuff of poetry and song. Virgo and Sagittarius adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 9, 40, 44, 20 and 13.
