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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (June 8, 2017)
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • THURSDAY, JUNE 8, 2017 FEATURES The one who got away? Dear Annie: My wife and I had moved to another state and it are in our late 50s and met in high was inconvenient to travel. The most recent reunion was school. “Barb” was the girl of my dreams, a cheerleader, popular arranged over social media, and and athletic. We began dating as I kept seeing pictures of Helen. seniors and married after I gradu- She is still gorgeous, married with ated from college. After we mar- children and grandchildren. Three years later, I am still com- ried, I noticed that Barb DEAR pelled to Google her to had little interest in sex. I learn everything I can was always the initiator, ANNIE about her. This has turned and this seemed to irri- into a compulsion that tate her and made our inti- I cannot stop. I haven’t macy rare. I decided to told my wife because this bury myself in my work would only create havoc and ignored the issue. in our marriage. I am not Today we are happily mar- interested in speaking to ried and have children and Lane a psychologist. My ques- grandchildren, and she is Annie Creators Syndicate Inc. tion is simple. How many still my best friend. Sex people suffer from such isn’t as much an issue, as I am older and have ignored my sex- feelings — feelings that they may have made a mistake but must now uality for years anyway. While we were dating back live with it to save the feelings of when, there was another girl, another? — Love Lost Dear Love Lost: I’m sure “Helen,” who made it obvious that she was interested in me. Helen many people at some point indulge was easily the prettiest girl I had in a bit of “what if” daydreaming, ever met, but I ignored those feel- whether it be about another person ings and stayed true to Barb. I they might have married or a career would see Helen at reunions — the path they might have taken. But we five-year, 10-year and 15-year — all know that the grass isn’t really and it took me a few months each greener on the other side; it just time to get over the feelings that I seems that way to those unsatisfied had for her. We stopped going to with their lot. Your crush on Helen these reunions, partly because we has more to do with your rela- tionship with Barb. The fact that you’ve ignored your sexuality for years doesn’t mean it’s not an issue anymore. Though every marriage is different, it’s important to share some form of intimacy. Redirect the energy spent Googling Helen into searching for ways to revital- ize your marriage, whether through counseling or an open, noncritical conversation with Barb. Dear Annie: I love your col- umn; I never miss it. Thank you for your advice. You’ve printed some letters from people com- plaining about noise. I can relate. I’m an 89-year-young man. I hear very well, but with too much back- ground noise, I get headaches. I like to go dancing at least twice a week — mostly to polka music. I avoid any bands that make a lot of noise. Even just being in buildings with loud people, I cannot take it. So I have troubles and sound like an old grouch. This is life. — Sam K. Dear Sam: Thank you for read- ing the column. It’s great you get out dancing twice a week. It might be worth talking to your doctor about solutions to protect your ears so you can keep partying to polka indefinitely. 5A TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Your powers of imagination are so mighty these days that they can be used as tools to overcome fear. A vivid picture of the future you’re creating will magnetically override your trepidation. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You might feel compelled to explain, defend or justify your choices to that person who seems to think he or she is owed a response. But the thing is, no one is owed anything from you today. Maybe you should proceed in silence. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Emotions seem to visit you from everywhere: the passing clouds; the picture that triggers a memory; a baleful passage of song; or an exuberant melody. It’s all ripe for inspiration. CANCER (June 22-July 22). To put one’s head inside the crocodile’s mouth isn’t bold; it’s foolish. Maybe it’s also foolish to put one’s heart in the hands of another and hope for mercy. Unfortunately, it’s love’s nature. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). If you could put to- day’s problem into a box, it would be a really tiny box. The key is to look at it as it really is, without letting your mind do fun-house mirror trickery on the situation. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). It’s going to really take some time and a major effort for your current endeavor to be fruitful. Are you ok with having nothing to show for your efforts for a long while? If you are, you know that this is the right pursuit for you. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Experience is the main goal, and a worthy one at that. When you do something for the sake of doing it, your expectations of yourself adjust accord- ingly and you can relax into the very fulfilling process of learning. FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Maybe you’re the most qualified person to assess your situation, and maybe you’re not. It would be wise to ask for other points of view. An outsider will help you understand something you didn’t before. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). It’s not so hard to make the choice to be kind to your- self. Even if this is not your first instinct, you’ll take to it and quickly understand why most progress is made by the self-encouraging. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). You think anyone could do your job, but the truth is that it wouldn’t be so easy to recast you. Even if someone proficient stepped in, it wouldn’t be the same. Anyway, today it just has to be you. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). This unhelp- ful thought you’re having: Did you have it yesterday, too? And the day before that? Its recurrence isn’t an indicator of its validity; it only means that it’s more of a habit than a thought. Habits can be broken. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Don’t be afraid to make the first move. As you make new friends you’ll help others get together, too. Your good cheer will reduce people’s social trepidation and fear of rejection. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (June 9). The start of this solar return comes with a feeling like you’ve landed on another planet. You’ve little in common with your surroundings and the beings who share them. There will be many benefits to learning this alien culture, and you’ll cash in on what you know. August features promises exchanged. Capricorn and Aries adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 7, 40, 22, 15 and 38.
