THE DAILY ASTORIAN • THURSDAY, JUNE 8, 2017
FEATURES
The one who got away?
Dear Annie: My wife and I had moved to another state and it
are in our late 50s and met in high was inconvenient to travel.
The most recent reunion was
school. “Barb” was the girl of my
dreams, a cheerleader, popular arranged over social media, and
and athletic. We began dating as I kept seeing pictures of Helen.
seniors and married after I gradu- She is still gorgeous, married with
ated from college. After we mar- children and grandchildren. Three
years later, I am still com-
ried, I noticed that Barb
DEAR
pelled to Google her to
had little interest in sex. I
learn everything I can
was always the initiator,
ANNIE
about her. This has turned
and this seemed to irri-
into a compulsion that
tate her and made our inti-
I cannot stop. I haven’t
macy rare. I decided to
told my wife because this
bury myself in my work
would only create havoc
and ignored the issue.
in our marriage. I am not
Today we are happily mar-
interested in speaking to
ried and have children and
Lane
a psychologist. My ques-
grandchildren, and she is Annie
Creators
Syndicate Inc.
tion is simple. How many
still my best friend. Sex
people suffer from such
isn’t as much an issue, as I
am older and have ignored my sex- feelings — feelings that they may
have made a mistake but must now
uality for years anyway.
While we were dating back live with it to save the feelings of
when, there was another girl, another? — Love Lost
Dear Love Lost: I’m sure
“Helen,” who made it obvious that
she was interested in me. Helen many people at some point indulge
was easily the prettiest girl I had in a bit of “what if” daydreaming,
ever met, but I ignored those feel- whether it be about another person
ings and stayed true to Barb. I they might have married or a career
would see Helen at reunions — the path they might have taken. But we
five-year, 10-year and 15-year — all know that the grass isn’t really
and it took me a few months each greener on the other side; it just
time to get over the feelings that I seems that way to those unsatisfied
had for her. We stopped going to with their lot. Your crush on Helen
these reunions, partly because we has more to do with your rela-
tionship with Barb. The fact that
you’ve ignored your sexuality for
years doesn’t mean it’s not an issue
anymore. Though every marriage
is different, it’s important to share
some form of intimacy. Redirect
the energy spent Googling Helen
into searching for ways to revital-
ize your marriage, whether through
counseling or an open, noncritical
conversation with Barb.
Dear Annie: I love your col-
umn; I never miss it. Thank you
for your advice. You’ve printed
some letters from people com-
plaining about noise. I can relate.
I’m an 89-year-young man. I hear
very well, but with too much back-
ground noise, I get headaches. I
like to go dancing at least twice a
week — mostly to polka music. I
avoid any bands that make a lot of
noise.
Even just being in buildings
with loud people, I cannot take it.
So I have troubles and sound like
an old grouch. This is life. — Sam
K.
Dear Sam: Thank you for read-
ing the column. It’s great you get
out dancing twice a week. It might
be worth talking to your doctor
about solutions to protect your ears
so you can keep partying to polka
indefinitely.
5A
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). Your powers of
imagination are so mighty these days that
they can be used as tools to overcome fear.
A vivid picture of the future you’re creating
will magnetically override your trepidation.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You might feel
compelled to explain, defend or justify your
choices to that person who seems to think
he or she is owed a response. But the thing
is, no one is owed anything from you today.
Maybe you should proceed in silence.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Emotions seem
to visit you from everywhere: the passing
clouds; the picture that triggers a memory;
a baleful passage of song; or an exuberant
melody. It’s all ripe for inspiration.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). To put one’s
head inside the crocodile’s mouth isn’t bold;
it’s foolish. Maybe it’s also foolish to put one’s
heart in the hands of another and hope for
mercy. Unfortunately, it’s love’s nature.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). If you could put to-
day’s problem into a box, it would be a really
tiny box. The key is to look at it as it really is,
without letting your mind do fun-house mirror
trickery on the situation.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). It’s going to
really take some time and a major effort
for your current endeavor to be fruitful. Are
you ok with having nothing to show for your
efforts for a long while? If you are, you know
that this is the right pursuit for you.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Experience is the
main goal, and a worthy one at that. When
you do something for the sake of doing it,
your expectations of yourself adjust accord-
ingly and you can relax into the very fulfilling
process of learning.
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Maybe you’re
the most qualified person to assess your
situation, and maybe you’re not. It would
be wise to ask for other points of view. An
outsider will help you understand something
you didn’t before.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). It’s not so
hard to make the choice to be kind to your-
self. Even if this is not your first instinct, you’ll
take to it and quickly understand why most
progress is made by the self-encouraging.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). You think
anyone could do your job, but the truth is
that it wouldn’t be so easy to recast you.
Even if someone proficient stepped in, it
wouldn’t be the same. Anyway, today it just
has to be you.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). This unhelp-
ful thought you’re having: Did you have it
yesterday, too? And the day before that? Its
recurrence isn’t an indicator of its validity; it
only means that it’s more of a habit than a
thought. Habits can be broken.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Don’t be afraid
to make the first move. As you make new
friends you’ll help others get together, too.
Your good cheer will reduce people’s social
trepidation and fear of rejection.
TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (June 9). The
start of this solar return comes with a feeling
like you’ve landed on another planet. You’ve
little in common with your surroundings and
the beings who share them. There will be
many benefits to learning this alien culture,
and you’ll cash in on what you know. August
features promises exchanged. Capricorn and
Aries adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 7,
40, 22, 15 and 38.