Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR
About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (June 1, 2017)
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • THURSDAY, JUNE 1, 2017 FEATURES Ignored when others are there Dear Annie: I have shared was saying. I recognize this as pas- a very close relationship with “Sue” for over 50 years. We sive-aggressive behavior, but worked together as young adults it puzzles me that she feels the and have remained dear friends need to control me or shut me throughout the years. We work down. She is the kindest, most very closely at our church, as Christian person I know, and I don’t know whether well. DEAR she even realizes what I know I have annoy- she is doing. I don’t ing habits and am ANNIE know why I am writ- thankful for my friends ing, because after all who love me anyway. of these years, noth- When it is just the two ing will change. I can’t of us, everything is analyze my impact or great with Sue and me. my aura or how I affect My annoyance with other people. If I could, her is that when she is Lane perhaps I would know in a conversation with Annie Creators Syndicate Inc. how to avoid being another person (usu- blown off as unimport- ally casual before or after church) and I approach and ant or insignificant, which is wait (or try to) until they are fin- how these situations make me ished, she does not glance at me feel. Perhaps we are both strong or acknowledge my presence in any way. I usually just walk personalities and this is her way of being in control. Do you have away. When she and I are hav- a suggestion, other than avoid- ing a conversation in a similar ing conversations when others situation, she’ll often stop me are present? — Mary Dear Mary: For all the talk when I’m in the middle of say- ing something so she can speak of conversation here, it sounds with every person who passes as if you’ve yet to tell Sue how by. Then I end up walking away you feel. It’s time to change that. because it is so distracting that I I really doubt that she’s con- honestly can’t remember what I sciously doing this to try to con- trol you, so give her the ben- efit of the doubt when raising the topic. Use “I” statements — e.g., “I’m sure you don’t mean to do this, but when we’re in the middle of talking and you stop to speak with passers-by, I feel ignored” — as opposed to “you” statements, e.g., “You ignore me.” True friends appre- ciate when a friend cares enough to be honest. Dear Annie: I want to sec- ond what “Nancy” had to say about loud music in businesses, stores and restaurants. It makes visiting with friends, which is usually the whole point of din- ing out, almost impossible. I regret to add the following: A lot of today’s churches are just as loud. I attend a great, theolog- ically solid church. I accept the contemporary music, but the blast level is pretty hard to take. I have discovered when I’ve traveled that it is the same across the country. The volume ranges from several notches above nec- essary to over-the-top painful. God is not deaf, and I don’t want to be. — Dynah Dear Dynah: Here’s hoping a sound tech reads this and dials down the noise. 5A TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Once the drama stirs up, you’re sunk. If you defend yourself too well, you look guilty. If you don’t, there will be regrets. The best defense is prevention. Don’t let conversations drift into dangerous waters. Stay in control. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Your attention is a treasured gift, but your neglect is not a terrible insult. It’s just that you can’t focus on everyone at once. Be careful not to set up expectations you won’t want to or be able to fulfill. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). It’s a good thing you have quick reflexes, because you’ll need them in today’s dicey social scenario. You might have to backpedal, pull your proverbial foot out of your mouth, or jump in to save someone from sure embarrassment. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Your No. 1-priority task will get done. The rest may not. So put the important stuff first. What’s important? It’s not a trick question. You know the answer; it’s just not the same one that another person wants you to choose. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). The work will be much more pleasant when you have the right tools for the job. Do research. Getting this one right before you even start will save you time, money and headaches. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). If you’re too strict with yourself, you will surely rebel. Loosen up. Otherwise you may find yourself craving forbid- den fruits (maybe ones you didn’t even know you liked!) in reaction to trying to be too perfect. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). The rightness of an action makes you brave. You don’t even have to think about it. You dive in and do the necessary thing. The time to be frightened is not before or during; it’s after. FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Of course no one is really better than another, but our egos have us flexing as though there’s something at stake that can be won with an air of superiority. You’ll really win by going in the opposite direction. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Patience isn’t the most exciting virtue, and there are many who don’t see its appeal. However, those who have patience can win the whole game just by avoid- ing the mistakes that impatient people make. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). To complain is to release some tension and perhaps gain the acknowledgement of a person who agrees. But this comes at a cost. Maybe the tension is a good thing if it forces you to take action instead of complain. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). When a bee becomes incensed, it stings the offender and then shortly after pays a price with his own life. Anger is not usually as costly an emotion for hu- mans, and yet it’s still a good idea to de-escalate conflict. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Just because you’re not in step with the others doesn’t mean your timing is off. Awareness is key here, be- cause you’re really good at adjusting to the pace of others when you want to. The question is, “Do you want to?” TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (June 2). Your work gets simultaneously more challenging and more creative over the next two months, and by the end of August you’ll have a prize to show for your dedication. Loved ones will have interesting propositions in September. You won’t regret what you do, only what you don’t do, so be adventur- ous in your choices. Libra and Capricorn adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 9, 44, 42, 30 and 15.
