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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Sept. 13, 2016)
FEATURES 6A Teen adapts to dad’s anger Dear Annie: I’m 18, and recently I’ve been having problems with my dad. I tried to be a mature person while growing up. I never had a par- ticularly rebellious stage. But my dad’s temper isn’t always controlla- ble. When I was young and things didn’t go his way, he would yell and throw things. Luckily, as I grew, his temper quelled a bit, but still when I don’t quite agree with his opinions — even if it’s just a small thing — he gets very emotional and angry. That scares me, and I just become resigned. I don’t want to argue and see no point in doing so. I’d rather agree and live as a happy family. But this has had its costs, and I’ve grown further and further apart from my family emotionally. I’ll be leaving my country and going to college soon, and I just want to change something for the better before it’s too late. — Venturing Out Dear Venturing: When you’re a kid, you don’t have much control over your living situation, so you adapt to it. You’ve learned how to get by and cope in your household over the years. Healthy detachment has been a useful device in your emotional toolkit, as it has prevented you from absorbing all the stress of your environment. Once you leave Dear Annie By Annie Lane Creators Syndicate Inc. home, you might ind it easier to let that protective wall down and be candid with your family. Before you go, try writing a let- ter to each of your family members to express your love and your hopes to have closer relationships with them. It may not immediately erase the emotional distance, but it will offer you a sense of peace. I wish you all the best. Dear Annie: I’m curious: What are the basic rules today for throw- ing baby showers? It has been a rule that showers are given by friends of the bride, not by her relatives. Recently, I attended my very close relative’s elaborate, well- themed irst baby shower. The mother-to-be has written her notes of gratitude (thank goodness). But I have a problem. I requested many gift suggestions and bought many of them, and because I planned to be out of town when the baby arrived, I also gave a gener- ous monetary gift. Handing it to the mother, I clearly asked that the large amount of money be put in an edu- cational fund for the baby. In the thank-you note, she stated that the money was used for the shower. Since when is it proper for the mother to pay for her own shower? I know it is a fast-paced, ever-chang- ing world we adults are caught up in. But can you explain this to me? — Perplexed Relative Dear Perplexed: Although it used to be considered poor form for anyone in a bride- or mother-to-be’s family to throw a shower (it might give the appearance of asking for money for your own family), it’s now socially acceptable and com- mon. Now, one would hope a bride- to-be or expectant mother wouldn’t have to go to the trouble of throw- ing the shower herself, but it’s not totally unheard of or rude to do so. Next time, if you want to make certain a inancial gift goes toward the baby’s education, look into open- ing a 529 college savings account (which you could invite other guests to contribute to, too). Your inancial planner can provide you with more information. THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 13, 2016 Tomorrow’s horoscope By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Are you just making the best of the way things are turning out or are things really turning out for the best? It’s hard to say, because with your stellar atti- tude you continually spot opportunity and turn potential into reality. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Nothing in life is created apart from others. The extent to which you depend on your crew is pretty remarkable today, and even more remarkable is the way they meet and then exceed your highest ex- pectations. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). It’s the same way with people as it is with fruit: When they’re squeezed, you find out what kind of juice is inside. The pressure is on today and this will work in your favor as people find out the pow- erful potion of zesty vitality you’re made of. CANCER (June 22-July 22). You’re in an ex- traordinarily selfless mood today and anyone lucky enough to join forces with you will expe- rience your loyalty. Their interests will become your interests, their goals your project, their obstacles your mission. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). The bad news is that you are definitely your own worst enemy. The good news is that you have no others today. So reason with yourself. Go easier. Call off the fight if you can. If not, do try and win yourself over. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). On whom can you depend? As emotionally close as you may feel to someone, practical matters must be as- sessed in practical terms. Reassess your sup- port system, based on the evidence of recent behavior. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Your reputation stirs up a sense of wonder, anticipation and expectation. What do they know about you be- fore you enter the room? How can you tweak FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE this early information to be seen in the best light? SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). This project could drag on for years, or it could be done in a few weeks. Go for the short route. Get more people involved, invest more money and con- centrate more time. The power of momentum is on your side. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Some things can’t be bought. What you need today can be. However, the greater the emotional connection is for those involved in making it happen, the smaller the dollar amount will be needed to fund the effort. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). To receive help you don’t need only keeps you from work- ing at the level that will allow you to attract the help you do need to grow. The more you can do to become self-sufficient, the better. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). There will be something of a competition involved in acquir- ing today’s goods. It will boil down to who got there first and how aggressively this person tries to pursue the spoils. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). If you didn’t set up your deal in the early stages of the plan, now that you’re at the end there’s a tough deci- sion to be made about how to split up the credit and the profit. WEDNESDAY’S BIRTHDAY (Sept. 14). Something you didn’t even see as a problem has been holding you back. This year you’ll come to an awareness and then blossom in a blink. Embracing the new way will be easy. In January you will demonstrate what years of practice and study have given you and be chosen for a position. Capricorn and Sagittar- ius adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 19, 2, 24, 31 and 11.
