Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR
About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (July 12, 2016)
FEATURES 6A Gran needs to set boundaries Dear Annie: I’m a grandmother to ive children. My son Brian and his wife, Amanda, have a 3-year-old and a 6-month-old together. They live several states away, about a ive-hour drive. I get to see them close to once a month, though, as they continually ask me to watch the kids while they go on vacation. When their baby was only 3 months old, they took a trip to a resort in Mexico. Personally, I would never leave an infant, so I don’t understand their desire to leave so often. Now they’re going on a weeklong cruise, and I’ll be baby-sitting again. I don’t mind watching the grand- kids. I love them to the moon and back, and really, I appreciate how nice it is that I get to spend time with them, especially while they’re still little and thrilled to see their grandma. But I think it’s getting out of hand, and I feel as if my son and daughter-in-law think I don’t have a life of my own. Am I being ridicu- lous? — Frustrated Grandma Dear Frustrated: Here’s a word that will change your life: “No.” Try using it the next time your son and his wife are daydreaming of making a tropical getaway and leaving you in charge of their home life. Giving in to their requests all the Dear Annie By Annie Lane Creators Syndicate Inc. time will leave you feeling taken advantage of and resentful. And that’s a sureire way to damage your rela- tionship with your son. Set boundaries. Dear Annie: I am dating Jacob, a man I met online two years ago. Soon after we connected online, I broke it off with the guy I had been seeing and lew to meet Jacob in Utah, where he lives. We hit it off and decided to start a long-dis- tance relationship. (I live on the East Coast.) Things were great for the irst few months. Then we started ight- ing almost every day, mostly about small stuff; he wasn’t calling me enough and hadn’t visited me (when I had visited him twice). We worked out a better routine, and he started visiting me every few months. But now I’m dealing with some other issues. THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TUESDAY, JULY 12, 2016 Tomorrow’s horoscope By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. Jacob is Mormon. (I’m not reli- gious.) He isn’t fully committed to his faith anymore, but he still goes to church every week and has a lot of friends from that community. One of these friends is a woman who is about his age (he’s 40) and has taken to sending me threatening Facebook messages about how I am “bad” and Jacob is a “good man” who deserves “a nice Mormon girl.” She makes me feel like a terrible person, and I’ve never even met this lady! I brought this up with Jacob, but he continues to act as if everything is ine when he sees this woman in group settings. He said he doesn’t want to confront her, because they have so many friends in common. I wish he would tell her to stop. He just laughs it off and says, “That’s just how Mary is. Don’t worry about her.” Well, I do worry! — Secular Girlfriend Dear Secular: Mormon or not, Jacob should not be allowing any- one to harass you in any way. If he is allowing this to go on from across the country, I shudder to think what he would tolerate if you lived in the same city. It sounds as if he either does not have much of a backbone to stick up for you or he does not care enough to. Move on and try to ind a new boyfriend. ARIES (March 21-April 19). What is it called when it seems like the whole world is conspiring to get in the way of “your thing”? Some call it bad luck; others call it a bad mood. Or maybe it’s a sign... TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Even with state-of-the-art tools, it is impossible to chart exactly how you experience the jour- ney. Still, you’ll be enriched by trying your very best to keep track. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Stocking your life with fun people has proven to be a stel- lar idea. It’s part of the reason you’re seeing a joke in most things now — not everything, mind you. If there were humor in everything, it would cease to be funny. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Make oth- ers feel comfortable, at ease and better about themselves and you’ve suddenly more clout than the most confident and au- thoritative person in the room. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). The current cos- mic lineup is a vitamin shot to your imag- ination. Use your creative powers to visu- alize your next incarnation and you’ll quite naturally find a way out of stale, negative patterns. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Some find comfort in knowing the numbers, but even statisticians don’t live their lives by statis- tics. Share a feeling. It’s more interesting than knowing and proliferating the cold facts. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). You’re witty. You could impress people with that, but for now let wit be your ace in the hole as you lean on other skills: empathy, listening, compassion, curiosity, the desire to create genuine rapport and more. FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). There are days when you can casually, lazily hanker for something and actually bring it to hand. Not most days though. Certainly not today. Desire makes things happen. Commit to what you want. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). The greedy person is afraid of being overlooked and undernourished by life in some way. It’s the same with other things as it is with food: Quantity doesn’t equal nutrition. “More” can often be harmful instead of fortifying. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). The ma- gician has to practice very hard to pull off the illusions but once the tricks are learned, executing them is easy. It’s the same with humor, which is more magical than magic. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You may have heard the answers already from your current fold, but those answers didn’t take hold, because familiarity sometimes caus- es deafness. It’s why you need to talk to new people, too. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). You’ve a sense of fun burbling up in you now, and you can’t help but share it. Kindred spirits will see the sparkle in your eye, and they’ll get ready to catch whatever else you’re throwing out. WEDNESDAY’S BIRTHDAY (July 13). Your birthday wish is a tall order, but it’s not out of line; nor is it outside the realm of possibility. Strides made in the next 10 weeks will make it so. A deal wraps up fa- vorably next month. September highlights family togetherness. There will be exciting developments in the realm of love and re- lationships in October. Capricorn and Aries adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 44, 12, 14, 7 and 50.