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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Jan. 22, 2016)
FEATURES 6A Tomorrow’s horoscope Man’s aches irritate wife Dear Annie: Please help me before I pull my hair out. I am 40 and have been married for the last eight years to a man I love more than I thought possible. We have a good relationship. We are open and talk often. My dilemma is that he com- plains all the time about aches and pains. Not a day goes by that there isn’t some ailment bothering him. I have tried to think back to earlier in our relationship, and I don’t recall whether he’s always done this and I had blinders on, or if his complaints have become more frequent. Granted, he has had his share of minor health problems, but so have I and many other people. I don’t want to overlook anything serious, nor do I think he is a hypo- chondriac, but I have found myself becoming more and more callus and dismissive of his complaints and have even caught myself roll- ing my eyes. This is not in my na- ture and I don’t like responding this way. How should I handle this situa- tion? If I tell him how I feel about it, I know it will hurt his feelings. On the other hand, if I do nothing, I am eventually going to snap and bark at him. Any suggestions? — Married to a Kvetch Annie’s Mailbox Creators Syndicate Inc. Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar Dear Married: The ¿rst thing you need to do is make sure his constant aches and pains are not, in fact, masking something worse. So the next time he grumbles, in- sist that he make an appointment with his doctor and go with him. If he says it’s “nothing to worry about,” tell him, “No. You’ve been complaining about this for a long time, and I want to be sure there is nothing seriously wrong.” If the doctor’s examination shows nothing beyond normal wear-and-tear, encourage your husband to get a massage, see a chiropractor or acupuncturist, or change his workout, which could be aggravating something. (If he’s not working out, suggest that he start, as it could help build up his strength.) If you do this with sin- cerity and concern every time he complains, he will become more aware of it and less likely to con- tinue. Dear Annie: I need to address your response to “Wary Wife,” whose husband used to go to strip clubs and she doesn’t trust that he’s not looking to meet strippers. This woman works two jobs and they have three children. Tell- ing her to be more attentive to her husband is shocking. Why isn’t her husband there for her and for their kids? Why has he money to go out while his wife has to work? I think there are serious ques- tions that need to be answered here. Please reconsider your re- sponse. — A. Dear A.: We appreciate that the wife is working hard, but she says in her letter, “I will admit that I haven’t been the most attentive wife,” so we think she needs to work on that, too. It cannot all be about the husband’s peccadilloes, even though he certainly is under- mining his wife’s trust and needs to stop. But you cannot neglect your spouse, regardless of the rea- son, and expect things to be just ¿ne. It doesn’t matter which one of them is more to blame. The point is to repair the damage and make the marriage stronger, and that will take effort from both of them. THE DAILY ASTORIAN • FRIDAY, JANUARY 22, 2016 By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). As for that secret expectation that you’ll excel beyond what any human has done up till now, well, it’s causing you too much stress. If you can’t let it go, at least shelve it for a while. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Instead of waiting for the right one to come along, you’ll work with the opportunity in front of you, de- termined to make the best of it and pull out every bit of goodness you can from it. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You’ve been known to place people on pedestals, though never unjustifiably. Once you hone in on a worthy subject, the flattery and at- tention you give will court a sweet propos- al, indeed. CANCER (June 22-July 22). You’ll let someone off the hook. It’s not because this person deserves the save, or because you’re an authority on the matter. It’s just because you’re merciful, which is an admi- rable thing to be. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). When the rou- tine gets stale, the work gets tedious and even the so-called leisure seems to hit a dull mark, something else, wonderful and inspiring, will show up to pull you through. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You may be willing to lose what you have but you’re not willing to gamble what other people have, and for this reason you’ll be trusted with a very important responsibility. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). First you didn’t believe it; then you suspected it; and now there is irrefutable evidence to confirm your suspicions: You are officially some- one’s favorite person. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). When you work with others to make something, your FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE feelings about what you’re making, your own abilities and the contributions of oth- ers get all swirled around into one beautiful amalgamation. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). The input demands response, and respond you must. If you rattle off the first things that come to mind, focusing on your heart and the way you really feel, you’ll say just the right thing. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). As Mom used to say, “There is no bored, only boring.” Uninteresting things and people suddenly become fascinating indeed when someone as inquisitive as you enters the picture. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You paid a price to develop your gifts. You gave your hours, your money and the very best of your attention to bring them up to the level they are at now. You’re right to be judicious in the sharing of these jewels. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Even if you and the other person both want to go to the same place, someone has to go first. The lane is narrow; only one can go at a time. Everything will go smoother when you de- cide who the leader is. SATURDAY’S BIRTHDAY (Jan. 23). The next 10 weeks will bring a hard-won victory involving a personal and private kind of success. In February you will get up to speed in several areas of your life at once, but in March you’ll narrow the focus to earning enough to make the investment of your dreams. Love comes at you in new ways in April. Aries and Gemini adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 3, 20, 14, 9 and 43.
