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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (June 19, 2015)
FEATURES 6A THE DAILY ASTORIAN • FRIDAY, JUNE 19, 2015 Controlling friend picks movies Tomorrow’s horoscope By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. Dear Annie: For the past 20 years, a good female friend of mine and I have gotten together every few weeks for walks, lunch and movies. The problem is, whenever we go to the movies, she always picks. I’m a pretty easygoing person and will see whatever she wants because even if the movie doesn’t sound great, I’m willing to give it a try. But whenever I say I would really love to see such-and- such a movie, she will never go. She gives excuses, like reading a review she didn’t like. In all the years we’ve seen films together, she has never once agreed to see one of my choices. Don’t all relationships require compromise? I feel like I do all the giving and she does all the taking. When I brought it up to her, she re- plied, “Well, everyone doesn’t like every movie.” I know this problem isn’t earth- shattering, but it is affecting me enough to question whether she is truly a friend. When she does this type of thing, it seems as though she has to control everything we do, which is not my idea of friend- ship. Any suggestions? — Had Enough of This Dear Had: Does she do this Annie’s Mailbox Creators Syndicate Inc. Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar only with movies? If so, she may simply not be adventurous enough to see anything she isn’t certain she will like, or she may be un- comfortable with certain types of films, such as horror movies or documentaries and too embar- rassed to say so. But if she tries to dominate every decision (type of restaurant, where you go walk- ing, etc.), then yes, she is the con- trolling type. You say she is a good friend. We assume she is pleasant company and there are other things you like about her. You have multiple ways of dealing with this: Put up with her choices and see the films that interest you with other like-mind- ed people; take movies off the list of activities to do together; tell her the next movie is your pick or you aren’t interested; or talk to her, letting her know her intransigence on the issue is building resentment and damaging the friendship. Dear Annie: Thank you for standing firm on your advice to “Blainville, Quebec,” who thought it was OK for a wedding guest to ask to bring her boyfriend. I host many events and am amazed by how many people do not understand that an invitation addressed solely to one person does not automatically include a plus one. It’s not only the bud- get. It’s the seating arrangements, keeping to the guest limits, accom- modations and meals. “Just one more” makes a huge difference, especially when several people want to add someone. I have had people ask to bring their neighbor “who wants to see your lovely home,” parents who ask to bring three extra children to a child’s birthday party at the cir- cus, and of course, the people who don’t RSVP and just show up. It is wrong to put a bride on the spot by making her feel obligated to incur an additional expense or explain to her new in-laws why she is changing the guest limit. It is never permissible to forego good manners and ask for whatev- er a person wants. — Massachu- setts FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH STONE SOUP B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE ARIES (March 21-April 19). “Could you bend the rules, just this once?” This is what you’ll hear, and you should be warned: Anyone who asks you to bend won’t ask you just this once. Consider strongly the policies that have made your life go well so far. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You add a dollop of humor and a spoonful of charm to your interactions. No one with an op- posing view has a chance to take offense. Your lucky attitude is the real reason you’re winning. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Asking too many questions or making too many com- ments creates problems where there were none. Keep it brief. Say only what you need to say to solve the issue at hand. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Praise will take you by surprise. It’s perfectly natural to be moved by this. You’ve long deserved the attention, but still, it might feel embar- rassing to you. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). These days you are doing more than your fair share of the domestic work. If you keep doing it, it will keep being left for you to do. So don’t rush to clean up. Let the others have a chance to pitch in. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Hold your attitude accountable. Is it warranted? Does it reflect the truth of the situation you’re in? While you’re at it, this is a good time to take your beliefs and thoughts to task, as well. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). There are many things that will contribute to your mood, most of which you can’t control. That’s why it’s so important to take charge wherever you can. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). There are many healthy and beneficial aspects to so- ciety, but don’t let yourself slip into group- think. Your unique point of view will be valu- able to others. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Let your loved ones give to you. You won’t be putting them out. Being on the receiving end for once will strengthen your relation- ship and keep your loved ones from taking you for granted. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). The natural nemesis of fire is said to be water, but fires are put out by earth, too. And the fire wouldn’t be able to catch on without air. You respect the powers of others. Strength and awareness are related. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Home in on the finer things in life. Please and de- light your senses. It’s actually a lot of work to figure out exactly what brings you the greatest pleasure. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). As much as you love your nearest and dearest, they can also be unreasonable, self-centered and annoying. You’ll regret it if you let this bother you. Your graceful tolerance will go down in history. SATURDAY’S BIRTHDAY (June 20). This year will be a financial high. You’re get- ting better and faster at doing what needs to be done to make a profit. Next month brings three new friends, each offering you a unique point of view. August is romantic. Domestic improvements will be worth the cost in October. Your family will bond and grow together in November. Aries and Vir- go people adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 41, 23, 3, 28 and 15.