Eugene weekly. (Eugene, Oregon) 1993-current, December 13, 2012, Image 39

Historic Oregon Newspapers

Eugene weekly., December 13, 2012, Page 39, Image 39

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About Eugene weekly. (Eugene, Oregon) 1993-current | View Entire Issue (Dec. 13, 2012)

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Newspaper Page Textkink WOMEN SEEK ING MEN BUSTY LOUD MOUTH I need help finding an attractive kinkster in eugene to sleep with. Into anarchy and equality. Lets drink coffee and fuck like industrial collapse is upon us(excitedly). biteybug, 20, g HORNY AND BORED Like constant touch. Want the warmth of hot skin on mine. Mtnfun, 38 ELOQUENT BLACK WOMAN I offer full body massages and role playing sessions. I prefer mature generous men. Eclipse2, 37, g WOMEN SEEK ING WOMEN SAVAGE WINK-KINK.COM WOMEN SEEK ING ? TEMPTATION, THAT’S ME I’m looking for discrete hook ups via web- cams and sexting first till we build up enough interest for our real intense pas- sionate encounter/s. Please be height weight proportionate or under. RazorSun, 31, g My friends would say i am easy going,fun- loving,honest,carring & a nice guy, to say the least. onelove13, 45, g JUSTFORFUN! 29 year old gemini, seeks fun. Very out going, very social, and loves to have a good time. 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Niceguy69, 36 PIPE FOR LADIES Treat your self to me dont cheat your self;) got PIPE for you right now. I freak all day and night for you.I will cater for real not for fake. 69man, 34 EXUBERANT AND CURIOUS Celibate for the longest time.I like it rough.I want to slam you against a wall,hear you moan as I put my face in your vajayjay. Iwant to do alotofthings butyet I’mbehindacomputerscreen. EO_SF, 23, g MEN SEEK ING ? STRONG SENSITIVE PASSIONATE I am a married man looking for discreet encounters with women who love the same things I do. I like long passionate kisses, extended foreplay, and mutual satisfaction. Giggidy, 49 I’m 5’4” bob-cut brunette with a penchant for adventure and a great smile. I am in a committed non-monogamous partnership, but hoping to branch out and meet other poly-friendly folks. gewilnian, 25, g REAWAKENED ANIMAL MEN SEEK ING MEN CURIOUS Bi-curious male, clean, fit, seeks beautiful boy for first time encounter. I want to adore your smooth, lean body. A lot to ask for? Of course. maxd, 42 NAUGHTY CD I’ll add to this later, but I’m not looking for anything in particular. I love women, I love sex, I’m kinky, open-minded and horny. SissySlutHeather, 27, g SATISFY YOUR FANTASIES! NUDE HOURS DAILY NOON TO 2:15 AM NO COVER W O R D S O F W I S D O M BY DA N S AVAG E At a dinner party, a straight man put a question to my boyfriend and me. He assumed that we, be- ing gay men, would have an answer for him. We did not, Dan, and so we turn to you. What happens to one if one has to fart while one is wearing a butt plug? Gays Are Simply Stumped, Yes And Sincerely So ONELOVE4U LOVE THE PUSSY we r man,women looking for a girl for some low key play he in his 50 me in my 30s we both love women ,want to play so complay. Devilgirl187, 35 LOVE Eugene Weekly’s local dating site DANCER AUDITIONS CALL 541-517-7196 MON/WED $15 TABLE DANCES NO COVER 1836 S. A Street • Springfield • 541-762-1503 20% OFF & 20% OFF FUN FACTORY DONA BEAUTY PRODUCTS like us on Facebook & follow us on Twitter for in-store specials! 290 River Rd | 86784 Franklin Blvd | 720 Garﬁ eld www.e-adultshop.com - 541.636.3203 If one is wearing a butt plug (“wear: to carry or to have on the body or about the person as a covering, ornament, or the like”), GASSYASS, then one may pass gas, silently or noisily, as one is wont to do, because a butt plug worn as a hat or a brooch or an epaulet — that is, a butt plug worn on the body — presents no impediment. But if one has fully inserted the bulbous end of the butt plug into one’s rectal cavity, and one’s sphincter muscles are gripping the neck of the butt plug, as they are wont to do, thereby ensuring that the bulbous end remains lodged in the rectal cavity while the ﬂ ared base remains outside of the rectal cavity (one could, if one wished to be pedantic, argue that one wears the ﬂ ared base of the butt plug against one’s anus), what would then happen if one attempted to pass gas? The force of the gas would either dislodge one’s butt plug, sending it ﬂ ying across one’s room, or, if one’s butt plug failed to dislodge and take ﬂ ight, cause one to simply explode. I had a conversation with a friend who is an emergency-room physician. He told me about remov- ing something — I can’t remember what — from a gentleman’s ass. My immediate response was to ask whether he had the ﬂ ared-base talk with the gentleman after the fact. His response? “What are you talking about?” I explained that if the gentleman had used a butt toy with a ﬂ ared base, he wouldn’t have been in the circumstances that brought him to the hospital. He had never thought of that and thanked me for the advice. My partner is a physician and has treated patients with anal “encumbrances.” He gives the ﬂ ared-base advice to anyone who seems like they might beneﬁ t from it — but he tells me this isn’t something they go over in med school. This shocks me because it seems like a topic where a little education could do a lot of good. You should use your column to bring this to the attention of medical school administrators. Conscience Cleared I am sharing your letter, CC, in the hopes that doctors all over the world read it and promptly incorpo- rate your “ﬂ ared-base” advice into their practice. If they don’t, well, then we will just have to conclude that ﬂ ared-base advice isn’t given to patients by doctors — ER or otherwise — because doctors se- cretly enjoy digging various foreign objects out of the variable rectums of various gentlemen. I’m a 19-year-old bisexual male. I’ve been in a two-year relationship with a girl who has a low sex drive, so we are in an open relationship and I occasionally have sex with guys. I really liked the last guy I got with and enjoyed having sex with him a lot. The problem was, I couldn’t get hard. Is the problem that I’m still trying to ﬁ gure out who I am and what I want? Am I not as attracted to guys as I thought I was? Or could it be guilt, even though my girlfriend is okay with it? Bisexually Oriented Nervously Experiencing Reversal You say you “occasionally have sex with guys,” BONER, which means this guy isn’t your ﬁ rst. He’s just the ﬁ rst guy — perhaps the ﬁ rst person — that you couldn’t get hard with. Let me guess: This has never happened to you before. Of course it hasn’t — you’re 19. But it happens to every guy sooner or later, and you’re much likelier to seek an explanation or attach some deeper meaning to it the ﬁ rst time it happens. (Maybe I’m not bi! Maybe it was guilt!) Don’t waste your time, BONER. Sometimes a soft dick is just a soft dick. If it keeps happening, well, then you may have a problem. But if you go on obsessing about an isolated incident — perhaps brought on by nerves (you liked this guy, right?) — you run the risk of creating a problem. I was on a layover in San Francisco. My attractive, bearish, platonic, straight male coworker would like to know if it is weird that a guy complimented his shoes while at the urinal in the SFO bathroom. Rhymes With Larry Craig? Yes. As I was reading the letters in the last Savage Love, it occurred to me that the debate over poly- amory as a “sexual orientation” is primarily one of deﬁ nitions. Some folks who are poly see that as just as “core” to their nature as their gender preference. Therefore, I propose the following frame- work. We all have a sexual identity composed of four components: 1. Our gender identity ranging from cis to trans. 2. Our sexual orientation ranging from homo to hetero. 3. Our sexual exclusivity ranging from purely monogamous to purely polyamorous. 4. Our sexual interest ranging from asexual to highly sexual. In my view, these four components are equal in that they are all things that we are rather than things that we choose. While it is possible to choose a lifestyle that deviates from one’s sexual identity, in all cases doing so entails stress, cognitive dissonance, and some degree of self-loath- ing. Like all conceptual frameworks, this one is not necessarily complete. It fails to include sexual interest in animals, particular age groups, or any of several hundred kinks, all of which are traits that seem to be more identity than choice. That said, I do think there is something unique and uni- versally applicable in the four-component scheme, and I think that we should as a society set a goal of acceptance and nondiscrimination surrounding all aspects of sexual identity. Just My Thoughts I like your model, JMT, but it has to be said: At a certain point, endless Tumblr-enabled debates about sexual identity, gender identity, sexual orientation, and sexual interests take on the ﬂ avor of those how-many-angels-can-dance-on-the-head-of-a-pin debates that obsessed theologians in the Middle Ages. For the record: Each of us is free — and remains free — to identify however we wish and to apply the labels “identity” and/or “orientation” however we please. If a particular person isn’t trying to take any- thing away from you, then the fact that the person holds slightly differing views on identity or orienta- tion, or the meanings of those words, or just how many angels can dance on the head of a pin, well, it really isn’t an enormous fucking deal, is it? And, in my opinion, those who spend their time debating, classifying, and unpacking sex and identity run a very real risk of disappearing up their own ass in a puff of santorum. Which is my way of saying ... No, I won’t be giving a column over to angry letters from buttsore people who feel that D/s is their sexual orientation, despite being told that I must because last week I suggested that, from my point of view, D/s is a sexual identity, not an orientation, and I gave a column to angry poly folks so it’s only fair and blah blah blah. FIND THE SAVAGE LOVECAST ʬMY WEEKLY PODCASTʭ EVERY TUESDAY AT THESTRANGER.COM/SAVAGE eugeneweekly.com • December 13, 2012 39