Eugene weekly. (Eugene, Oregon) 1993-current, May 26, 2011, Image 34

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Eugene weekly., May 26, 2011, Page 34, Image 34

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Newspaper Page TextWINK Respond to a Wink ad. Visit wink-kink.com and enter the ad ID Ads with a ☎ have Voice Mail Messages call 1-520-547-3013 • Browse local postings • Post your own proﬁ le Eugene Weekly’s Local Dating Site (Charges may apply) MUSICFINATIC “CUTE CAR” Moved here 4rm da east coast. I LOVE GURLS. Basically I do wat I want wateva dat is lol. Im new 2 da area & ready have fun!! magic2701, 20, g , #106093 So you said walking out of Full City on 5/17. I was tongue tied, maybe coffee would untie it? When: Tuesday, May 17, 2011. Where: Full City Coffee. You: Woman. Me: Man. #902106 SOUTHERNBELLE TREEHUG- GER HOPELESSROMANTIC QUIRKY HIGH ENERGY Born and Raised. I’m a Eugene Native,Single mother looking for someone to just hang out with and get to know on an intellec- tual level, not someone who just wants sex. Brat, 30, g , #106201 WORLD TRAVELER Sweet and honest person look- ing for the right, honest compan- ion and friend to share life’s experiences and pleasures. I love books, garage sales, NPR, the Ducks, football, track and traveling. loulou, 61, #101279 HORSES, GARDENS, SUNRISES Country lady looking for her male counterpart- I have 2 hors- es and love to ride, need a part- ner! Would prefer someone with his own horse, please be single! g , goddess2, 60, #106091 ANY GTFS READING? I’m sick of being “The Smart One.” Let’s have some fun and pepper it with intelligent conver- sation. Nothing too serious; we’re all busy people and life’s too short! dorkylitchick, 25, #106046 justmoved here fromTN.im laid back.downtoearth lovemusic.art. goodbeer.goodbud.lookin to make new friends.meet new people.lovemusic!lovefestivals n shows.i am my own person.tat- toos.piercings.people whocan keep up with me.witty.outspo- ken.lil wild.like to party.if u wan- naknow morejust lemmeknow. southern_charmer89, 22, g , #106033 A CHARMING POLYGON I love Bob Dylan and Nicki Minaj. I like to cook, dance and bike to Trader Joe’s. My dream is to live in a house with tons of flowers. patty, 20, ☎, g , #105932 BLONDE AND INTELLIGENT I’m a confident person who loves to be with other people. I try to be nice to the people around me. I like to do random things, and find adventures. kelandry4157, 19, g , #105724 LITTLEMISSFUNSHINE;) i’m a cat loving stoner, with a great body,i love dressing up, i have a boyfriend but this is for me, i would like to hang out and get to know a nice pretty girl,. ashliemae91, 20, g , #105720 GAME OF POOL SMOKE BREAK LAIDBACK HUMOROUS CHAP Want meet some new people. Open to do just about anything. Looking for folk that don’t mind a kid, like to laugh, have a beer and kick back. Why not? stop- g , s4pennies, 33, #106232 PRAGMATIC EDUCATED MAN Looking for a woman who knows the meaning of Pragmatic and other large words!I have adegree inNetwork Admin.and in culinary arts aswellas otherdegrees(liket okeepthenogginbusy)would like someone to talk to The Pragmatist. Shag, 30, #106204 SOMETHING INTERESTING SEARCHING FOR SOMEONE Newly single Shy guy, looking for the right one, gonna take my time deciding. SinglySHY, 31, g , #106236 A spiritual warrior with an addic- tion to ink, I’m seeking friends and compatriots to share lifes pathways. I’m artistic, flamboy- ant, introspective,articulate, opinionated, compassionate,and passionate about those things I believe in. tattooed_sha- man, 47, g , #106190 Free Will Astrology learn,” said cartoon anti-hero Homer Simpson. “It’s what separates us from the animals — except the weasel.” I normally don’t share that sentiment. My standard advice is to face up to challenging situations and take responsibility for the part you played in creating them. But I’m going to rebel against my custom this week and endorse Homer’s approach, Aries. You may be on the verge of getting sucked into a mess that you had virtually no role in creating. Either that, or you’ll be asked to carry out a mission that is irrelevant to your long-term goals. In either case, you have cosmic permission to weasel out. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): I’m going to bring up a sore subject only because I think you’re ﬁ nally ready to make it much less of a sore subject. The truth as I see it, Taurus, is that a part of you got petriﬁ ed way back when. A formerly ﬂ uid and ﬂ exible part of your psyche got turned into stone, metaphorically speaking, losing much of its usefulness and creating distortions throughout the rest of you. Now, after all this time, you have circled back to a phase when you have the power to at least partially un- petrify this lost function. To get the process started, I suggest you turn your attention to it in such a way that you feel like laughing and crying at the same time. GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Poet Gerard Manley Hopkins coined the verb “to selve,” which is what a person does in the process of creating his or her distinctive presence in the world. Writing this column is an ongoing opportunity for me to selve, for example, because each time I conjure up a new horoscope I exercise the idiosyncratic combination of skills, attitudes, training, and knowledge that is special to me. According to my reading of the omens, Gemini, you are in a phase when you have a sacred duty to selve with extra intensity and alacrity. In fact, I suggest you be ruthless in seeking out experiences that give you a chance to tap into, cultivate, and express your most unique qualities. CANCER (June 21-July 22): Here comes your ninth loss of innocence, Cancerian. Or is it your tenth? As you will soon prove once again, you manage to make every time feel like the ﬁ rst time. When the moment arrives and the sweet purity ebbs away, the twinge that shudders through you will have the same primal intensity you’ve experienced before. But here’s the redemption: Like most of the previous transitions, this one will lead to a surprising blessing you couldn’t have gotten any other way. When your innocence is reborn — as it will be, sooner or later — it will be wiser and wilder than ever before. (July 23-Aug. 22): There’s a small chance that the following scenario will soon come to pass: You’ll be invited to become part of a situation that promises to give you special privileges or inside information, but 34 MAY 26, 2011 EUGENE WEEKLY THAT’S MY CUPCAKE! I love going to the movies, going out for dinner and drinks. Going to baseball games. I enjoy paint- ing, reading a good book or just listening to some good music. VintageLakeHouse, 26, g , #106088 SNOWBOARDING RAGER/ EX-YUMMER! I like the outdoors. I’m a blazer. I like music. I’m distracted easily. I like to travel. I like to organize. I love food. I like to Rage. BusBoy186, 20, g , #105839 GLENN BECK SUCKS HELLO Hi I preffer you ask me. Jaydeb, 22, #106246 VA POUR G‚TEAU? Music history student at LCC. I like cooking, hanging out, and drinking coffee. I have no prefer- ence to kinks, as I am willing to try most things. Tehfuzzycrab, 23, g , #106199 Quirky gay boy, scientific mind, well kept and hygienic. Enjoys cuddling under the stars, good music, and Dan Savage’s column. Nonsmoker, 18, tall, open minded, passionate. viriproviri, 18, g , #105543 CONTRADICTIONS ARE FUN. I’m a budding academic who is really disinterested in the pro- fession. I’m also an astrologer. And agnostic. And funny. And sour. And sharp. And soft. Confused? It’s simple, really. thethinker, 21, #105442 SAMBOND’S SUNDAY NIGHT METAL, ANIME, COMICS, NERDY, GUITAR Im a metalhead nerd who is look- ing a for girl to hang with,who likes metal and going to metal shows with me so we can head- bang and mosh. Deth21, 20, #106217 NEED A FRIEND Fighting the mid-life crisis n los- ing the battle,don’t plan on going down easy or alone,need a part- ner in crime to get me into trou- ble or get me out of trouble. fishguy, 54, #105589 CHILD-FREE ATHEIST 29, married, no kids. Would like to find some cool girls to go out with, without worrying about babysitters. I can hang with any- one, but not into sports or reli- gion. DrGirlfriend, 29, g , #106120 EASY GOING ATTITUDE. Looking for a friend to talk to, that’s really all. mcveigsh, 21, g , #106097 You - Absolutely Adorable in plaid shirt and hat. Me - purple tanktop dancing like crazy. We made eye contact several times, I was bummed you didn’t even say hi...Coffee? When: Sunday, May 22, 2011. Where: Sam Bond’s Garage. You: Man. Me: Woman. #902109 SORRY VIC:( You pissed me off, but I still shouldn’t have let you go driving around for a hotel when we’d been drinking all night. When: Sunday, May 22, 2011. Where: downtown. You: Man. Me: Woman. #902108 RE:LOSE A GUITAR In fact, I did. My friend got his guitar stolen out of his car on May 9th. Description: Breedlove Acoustic Electric Cutaway w/ custom pickup + colorful sticker on it. When: Monday, May 9, 2011. Where: if u have this guitar, plz reply back. You: Man. Me: Woman. #902107 don't have a computer but want to place a personals ad? Place an ad with EW directly, responses sent to us by snail mail $25 for four weeks, 30 words or less 541-484-0519 1251 Lincoln St 8am-5pm BY ROB BREZSNY ARIES (March 21-April 19): “Weaseling out of things is important to LEO optimusprime, waltwhitman and dr.seuss hada baby; it was me!!! Muscley,fit,bearded, athlete- dreamer-artist-yogi-poetboy seeks twinkly-eyed poetgirl, maybe inked, hopefully kinked;) let’s grin at salamanders and bumblebees, eatcupcakes onthe trampoline, and benew likechil- dren.... cyclone_poet_boy, 36, g , #106181 DANCING FIDDLE MAKER Mermaid Ca r ve r, ViolinGuitarMaker, Artist, Dancer, Woodsman, Lover of Nature, Gardener, Farmer, Rain Showers, Skinny Dipper, Lover of Tropics, Beethoven, Bob Marley, Grateful Dead, Jazz, Arts, seeking Natural Hippie Woods Woman. fiddle- mon, 56, ☎, g , #106192 HEDONISTIC WANDERING ARTIST Married woman looking for a woman. captainbolo, 35, #106213 BORNOFTHESKY AND DREAMING!!! pretty girl who knows how to make a damn good americano. outside the goat having a smoke. you said you liked my shoes.i didnt know what to say.coffee and cigarettes? When: Monday, May 23, 2011. Where: outside the wan- dering goat. You: Woman. Me: Woman. #902110 Francesca w/cowgirl boots. Played pool, your team won. You ride your bike to work and think ultimate frisbee is funny. Hoped to run into you again but didn’t. Rematch/coffee sometime? When: Wednesday, December 15, 2010. Where: Jameson’s. You: Woman. Me: Man. #902105 after you join you’ll ﬁ nd out that your participation would require you to compromise your principles. But there’s a far greater chance — over 80 percent — that the following scenario will take place: You’ll be invited to join your fortunes to a group or circle or tribe or situation that won’t ask you to dilute your integrity or betray your values at all. In fact, it’s likely to activate a dormant part of your potential. The moral of the story, Leo: Be very discerning. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Right now you have more power than you realize — more power to understand confusing situations, more power to inﬂ uence people you’ve assumed are resistant to change, and more power to overcome your apparent disadvantages. In fact the only factor that could prevent you from accomplishing way more than what you thought possible is a lack of conﬁ dence. Please note, Virgo: I’m not urging you to cultivate a foolishly arrogant faith in your ego. Rather, I’m clueing you in to the fact that there are hidden forces at work you can call on to help you — wisdom that has been dormant, love that has been neglected, and allies who have been mum. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): According to the Guinness Book of World Records, the longest love letter in history was written by an Indian man named Harish Kondakkuli. The gushing 143-page message took him over three months to complete. Oddly, it was addressed to an imaginary woman, since there was no one in his life he was actually in love with. I encourage you to consider the possibility of exceeding his achievement in the coming weeks, Libra. You’re at the peak of your ability to express wickedly delicious passions and profoundly tender intentions. There may even be a real person, not an imaginary one, who warrants your extravagant outﬂ ow. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Postsecret.com is a website where people can anonymously reveal their deep, dark feelings. I came across one entry that I think would be perfect for you to use as your own in the coming weeks. “I don’t want to cover up my scar,” it read. “It’s a good conversation starter and it makes me look bad-ass. But thank you anyway!” To further inspire what I hope will be your fearless effort to claim the power inherent in your wounds, I also offer this spur from musician and author Henry Rollins: “Scar tissue is stronger than regular tissue. Realize the strength, move on.” SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): In her irreverent platinum-selling song “Monster,” Sagittarian rapper Nicki Minaj offers up a poetic sequence never before heard in the history of the planet: “Pull up in the monster… with a bad b-tch that came from Sri Lanka / yeah I’m in that Tonka, color of Willy Wonka.” I hope that you will soon come up with an equally revolutionary innovation in your own chosen ﬁ eld, Sagittarius. All the cosmic forces will be conspiring in the coming weeks to help you to do the equivalent of rhyming “Tonka” and “Sri Lanka” with “Willy Wonka.” Please cooperate! (The NSFW video is here: http://bit.ly/MinajMonster.) CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Time is the enemy of romantic love, said Andrew Marvell in his 17th-century poem “To His Coy Mistress.” Medieval author Andreas Capellanus had a different idea, identifying marriage as the enemy of romantic love. In Richard Wagner’s opera Tristan and Isolde, Tristan rails against the daylight, calling it the enemy of romantic love. And in their book Immediacy and Refl ection in Kierkegaard’s Thought, the editors theorize that “capitalism, which makes a fetish out of sex . . . is the enemy of romantic love.” While all of those statements may be true, they’re only mildly relevant for you right now. The most dangerous enemy of romantic love — or any other kind of love, for that matter — is this: not listening well. Overcome that enemy, Capricorn. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In an age when bee populations have dropped dramatically, some gardeners have found they need to pollinate their tomato plants manually. One woman I know tickles each swollen bulb of seeds with a toothbrush. Another uses a camel-hair brush. Metaphorically speaking, Aquarius, I suspect you will have to try something similar in the coming weeks: making an intervention to facilitate a fertilizing process that doesn’t quite seem to be happening naturally. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): In the coming week, your psyche may sometimes have an odd tingling sensation that resembles what happens when you hit your funny bone. Is it painful? Is it pleasurable? Maybe some of both, with the net effect being a command to wake up and play harder, love stronger, and notice more beauty. If you respond to that mandate with even a moderate amount of passion, I suspect you’ll get a surprising reward: At least one of the secret laws of your own nature will reveal itself to you, rising up clear and raw in a sweet waking vision. HOMEWORK: What name would you choose for yourself if you couldn’t have the one you do now? Write: Freewillastrology.com Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny's EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES and DAILY TEXT MESSAGE HOROSCOPES. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700. WWW.EUGENEWEEKLY.COM • BLOGS.EUGENEWEEKLY.COM