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About Eugene weekly. (Eugene, Oregon) 1993-current | View Entire Issue (May 22, 2008)
TO PLACE A CLASSIFIED AD CALL 484.0519 PLUMBER: EQUAL Employment Opportunity applications for apprentice Plumber positions are being distributed by the Are III Plumbing Apprenticeship com- mittee. This is a State registered program leading to an Oregon Plumber License. This opening is for Eastern Lane county and Douglas County with applications being distributed from May 27, 2008 through June 13, 2008. Mail a written request for an application package and description of trade to: Committee Administrator’s Office, 864 Nantucket Avenue, Eugene, OR 97404. Please state in your request that you want the Plumber application for Lane or Douglas county. When returning the appli- cation, supply a copy of a transcript, diplo- ma, or GED certificate documenting gradu- ation from high school. All returned appli- cations must be postmarked no later than Jun 20, 2008. MCMENAMINS OUR locations in Eugene are now hiring both seasonal and long-term, experienced PT-FT Line Cooks and Servers for our fast paced restaurants. Must have flex schedule (days/eves/wknd/hldy). Apply online at HYPERLINK “http://www.mcme- namins.com” www.mcmenamins.com. No phone calls please! E.O.E. INSTRUCTIONAL ASSISTANT Lane ESD is seeking applicants for the positions of SPED Instructional Assistants. See our website at www.lane.k12.or.us/hr/jobs/index.html. Contact HR at 541-461-8244 or email hr@lane.k12.or.us with questions. VOLUNTEERS NEEDED for SARA’s Treasures thrift shop & cat adoption center. Your fun, rewarding 5 hour shift per week will help us save lives! www.sarastreasures.org. 871 River Road, Eugene (541) 607-8892. EUGENE’S PRIMER tattoo studio, Black Lotus, is looking for a licensed tattoo artist. Please call 541-434-8282 for details. HOME REFUND JOBS. Earn $3,500-$5,000 Weekly Processing Company Refunds Online! Guaranteed Paychecks! No Experience Needed! Positions Available Today! Register Online Now! http://www.RebateWork.com (AAN CAN) Volunteer Opportunities Business Opportunities LAW OF ATTRACTION Potential to make your annual income your monthly income. 1-888- 238-3163 $100-$500,000 FREE CASH GRANTS! Billions UNCLAIMED! Housing, School, Business, Some Personal Bills. Grant Resource Package! +Other Money Solutions! Live Operators! 1-800-592-0362 Ext. 235. PACKAGES PROCESSING manager MAIL PACKAGES from home without leaving your current job. Easy! Ship parcels from our clients. Get paid $24 per parcel! Info: http://eastway.biz/vacancies.html POST OFFICE now hiring! Avg. pay $20/hour or $57K yr includes Federal Benefits and OT. Placed by adSource, not affiliated w/ USPS who hires. 1-866-616-7019. (AAN CAN) EMPLOYMENT OFFER Part time. No experi- ence required. Good people skills. Lots of opportunities! Manufacturing Excellent pay & benefits! Full benefits package. contact us for more: davidsmark_co@yahoo.com Apply now! GTS COMPUTING NEW TO COMPUTERS? Need Help with Your ONLINE BUSINESS? Advice • Tutoring • Purchasing • Upgrading • Repair • FAST INTERNET SETUP • Home Networking • PC - Mac • In-home or Shop Affordable, Professional,Courteous 24hour 7day Service . Free Pickup, Delivery, Assessment Jonathan Brown A.A.S., B.S. (541) 844-9256 lotus_optic@yahoo.com Hair Design by Indoor Heated Pool Christina The Dublin House “A touch of class on the Oregon Coast” Advanced training at Toni & Guy Academy. Ocean Views • Big Clean Rooms Room Phones • King/Queen Beds Color TV • Fly Shop • Trips Always continuing education through classes and shows. • Designer Cuts • Color • Weaves • Bare Mineral Make-up • Pedicures • Waxing • Facials Call for: *Phone Consultation *Location *Hours (541) 337-1210 AUSSIE PET MOBILE Keep ’em Clean ’n Cute M OBILE P ET G ROOMING THAT COMES TO YOU ! $ 10 OFF first time customers An additional $ 10 OFF OR FREE toothbrushing 1-800-PET-MOBILE 1-800-738-6624 www.aussiepetmobile.com ½ PRICE OFFER Your Best Value! Oct. thru June. Call for details. (541) 547-3703 TOLL FREE: 1-866-yachats (922-4287) email: dublinhs@casco.net web: www.dublinhousemotel.com Hwy. 101 & 7th St. • Yachats, OR 97498 Greenhill ❊ Pet of the Week ❊ Everybody deserves a good home Patootie is a big, sweet 12 year old gray and white tabby gentleman with short fur. He’s talk- ative and friendly. Patootie likes being held and will make a won- derful lap cat. He was an indoors/outdoors kitty in his previous home and is already house trained. He gets along great with young children and with other cats. Patootie has charmed the staff here at Greenhill but can’t wait to find his very own family that he can love and adore. Come meet him at Greenhill Humane Society Friday through Tuesday, 11am-6pm. We are located at 88530 Green Hill Road 541-689-1503 • www.green-hill.org 88530 Greenhill Rd ¡ASK A MEXICAN! BY GUSTAVO ARELLANO Dear Mexican: Why did the Mexican comedian Cantinflas never catch on in Hollywood? I thought he was supposed to usher in the Mexican wave of actors and movies that would help transform Hollywood. Instead, that move- ment ended up flat as a tortilla. – El Curioso Dear Curious Gabacho: Do people even know who Cantinflas is any- more? For those of you not familiar with the actor, Cantinflas was Mexico’s Charlie Chaplin — wait, do people even know who Charlie Chaplin is anymore? For those of you not familiar with the actor, Charlie Chaplin was the greatest star of the silent film era — wait, do people even know what silent films are anymore? Sorry for the digressions, but your pre- gunta is so wonderfully anachronistic that most people might think it’s as relevant to the present day as the Nez Perce. But Cantinflas (born Mario Moreno) offers a valuable les- son to today’s Mexican thespi- ans. Instead of accepting every stereotypical Mexican role Hollywood offered, Cantinflas signed on for only two: as the butler Passepartout in the 1956 film Around the World in 80 Days and the titular character in 1960’s Pepe. He drew praise for his acting in the first but bombed in the second, mostly because of a linguistic comedic barrier: his verbal humor, a mishmash of double entendres, non sequiturs, and puns so genius it notched its own verb (cantinflear) in the Royal Academy of Spanish dic- tionary. Understanding that the nuances of his craft were virtually impos- sible to translate, Cantinflas decided to focus on Mexican films and never appeared in another English-language production. The lesson for today’s wabby Oliviers? Maintain your dignity, don’t sell off your talent for a cheap buck, and never offer your services for something called Beverly Hills Chihuahua — wait, Salma Hayek, Cheech Marin, Edward James Olmos, Paul Rodriguez and George Lopez are starring in this fall flick? Virtually every modern-day Mexican actor that studios respect are willing to voice dogs?! Unless it’s a social satire on the level of The Importance of Being Earnest, this Disney movie seems like the worst Mexican disaster since NAFTA. I’m a California white boy with many Mexican friends. In addition to that, I’ve been running a fantasy baseball league for nine years. For the first time, we have a large percentage of Mexicans in our league — of the 14 teams, Mexicans run three of them, and one gabacho has a Mexican wife. One of those Mexican-run teams came up with the name The Fence Hoppers. This doesn’t really affect me personally, but as commissioner, I need to make sure other people don’t get bent out of shape over it. Should I be worried, or is it the equivalent to blacks dropping N-bombs on each other? You or Bud Selig are the only two people who can help me. – Dinger Donger Dear Gabacho: First off, fuck Bud Selig: the man wouldn’t know how to run Major League Baseball if you gave him two balls and a Louisville Slugger. Considering the sport features the Cleveland Indians, whose mascot is a grinning, red-skinned Injun named Chief Wahoo, and allows a team to ridiculously name itself the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, The Fence Hoppers is benign — and, if anyone asks, say it refers to horsehides landing in the bleachers instead of Mexicans plopping onto American soil. C ON FI D E NT I A L T O: The lady who sent me a profane rant weaving together Poles, Mexicans, Ellis Island, taco necks and leprosy. Chula: I loved your letter, but I’m not in the habit of printing thoughts; I answer questions. Same goes for the rest of the Know Nothing nation: Guatemalans are smart enough to turn their bile into preguntas — are ustedes dumber than Guatemalans? Get all your Mexican needs at youtube.com/askamexicano, myspace.com/ocwab, and themexican@askamexican.net! Hours: Fri-Tu 11am-6pm • Closed Wednesday & Thursday WWW.EUGENEWEEKLY.COM • BLOGS.EUGENEWEEKLY.COM EUGENE WEEKLY MAY 22, 2008 37
