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About Eugene weekly. (Eugene, Oregon) 1993-current | View Entire Issue (March 13, 2008)
WALKING AT 5TH MKT ALBERTSONS ON ROYAL MASSAGE PARTNER 49 YO BI LEZ walking behind you by Steelhead when the puppy stopped your tracks. beautiful smile. you looked as though you were wandering.. wander to me? you-gorgeous red hair, jeans, hiking backpack. i want to take a long walk with you! Mon, Feb 25, I asked you if you had seen any cream of mush- room soup. Wanted to ask you out but didn’t know if appro- priate. Dinner, Movie? Write to blind box “Albertsons” ✍ Petite middle-age woman looking to trade bi-weekly massages with compatibly- sized m or f. Have table? Write to blind box “Massage” ✍ Newly single. Looking for fun, bush mowing, mild b/d. Safe. Discreet. No strings, drugs, smoking, heavy drinking. Age, gender unimportant. Must love to give oral. 556 ✍ HOT GARDENER Eugene Coffee Co., 18th & Chambers. You: Excellent green pants, adidas hat, adorable smile. Me: soccer shorts. Come here often? Meet me March 15th for free coffee? GAIL JUGGLING LESSON Why would you want me to call you, I’m ordered not to. Out of all the things you’ve done what hurts the worst is know- ing we can’t be together. Once trust is gone it can’t be replaced. “Texas” the juggler Feb. 8th at the fairgrounds. You were both my hands. You do indeed know the secret. Thank you for a few minutes of joy. Thank you little love light for leveling a limited life, now lift- ed to laugh and be love. I'M EASY SOULSCYTHED LIFE IS A BAGEL I heard your hearty laugh and had to smile to myself. Want to go on a bike ride naked? Love Pooter Easy to place, easy to respond. Look deep to find your desires I LAHK POTATOES SMILING HEARTS To my Sexy Spanish Rockstar! Rich or poor, I love you more than anything! Yours Eternally, Sunny Hunny Bunny!! i see your stickers all over, but not enough of you. find me, im always at my spots. (and you know my house is never locked...) I saw you long ago at McKenzie Photo in Springfield and Mt. Pisgah too. Fabulous artist, Brent B. Give us a call if you’re around. 868-3686. JOHN HENRYS STAGE 80’s night, wearing white A frame, mini-mustache dancing your heart out. Watching you dance made me happy, hope to see it again soon. Never put away your dancing shoes. TO B FROM K I like being friends with U 2. Z Big Bird? Cup O Joe? Cowboy Jackson? Page boy? Please behave. GIRL AT BUFFALO you melt me and i dont even know you i geuss its your smile and positive attitude. you make portlands buffalo seem pathetic.. pool? KEVIN Thank you again for returning my phone....Your good karma abounds!! Jessika SWEET LIFE We made awesome eye con- tact at Sweet life, I just came from Tango, sport coat, black shirt, you were working. I want to know you. call me... David - trytogetalong@hotmail.com LOOKING FOR BBW dwm, 45, looking for bbw, 30- 55, for discrete love making sessions. will do almost any- thing, including oral, write to blind box “looking for bbw”. ✍ SEEKING FRIENDS I’m in a lonely place in life, and I’d like to reach out to new people & places to fill that gap. I love to write, send pictures and put a smile on someone else’s face. If your in need of a new friend, I’m your guy. I’m 23, 6’, green eyes. Write to blind box “Seeking friends” ✍ BALLROOM DANCE Good follow ISO good lead for intermediate level social ball- room dance. Current favorites: cha cha, night club 2-step, samba, rumba, swing, waltz, zydeco. Sense of humor required. Write to blind box “Ballroom Dance” ✍ HIKING BUDDY Lookin for male or female hik- ing companion. Medium to dif- ficult, possible mountain climbing in the spring. Write to blind box “Hiking Buddy”✍ GET EUCHRED! Join other euchre players every monday night. 6-handed game, way cool! drew@playful.com LOST IN TIME White boy convict, 28 yo, good heart, solid mind, lots of charisma, looking for fun/exciting females to corre- spond with. Write to blind box “Lost in time” ✍ Married man missing warm hugs and kisses. HWP, funny, witty, sarcastic and shaved head. Would love to share pas- sion and romance. Lets start with coffee and muffin. Write to blind box “Friendly Fling” ✍ I NEED A MISTRESS Need a mistress to please! Height, Weight, race, looks are of course unimportant, only the desire to be pleased! Email robert at: roblar454@yahoo.com WANT TO SHARE? LOVE BUG SXY BLONDE 4 BLACK Sexy, thin, blonde housewife seeking endowed black male to help husband fulfill fantasy. Ever wanted to do another man’s sexy wife? email baby- blonde@comcast.net. We’re for real! You be too! FRIENDLY FLING Straight couple seeking sec- ond wife. Must be tolerant of indoor pets and smoking. Want to share? Write to blind box “Want to share?” I saw you first!! All these chad’s need to step down off my Love bug yam Taki.!? Love you. () NEED FAB ARTIST CHUCKLES Daylyn, Chuckles is looking for you. Looking for your face in every crowd. And every blocked cell phone number for your voice. 760-553-4555. HORNY BI-MALE Looking for new and exciting sexual adventures. I’m a SWM 39 HWP open to just about any- thing. All shapes, sizes and col- ors welcum! Write to blind box “Horny Bi-male” ✍ GET ON IT! Wm looking for female swing partner, 40’s-50’s. Must be bold, funny, open to anything sexual. One on one, three- somes, swaping.. n/s, lite drinker, std free. Write to blind box “Get on it!” ✍ LOOKING..... 28 yo, bimale, currently a con- vict that goes home soon. Looking for friendship or sex buddies. Women, men, or cou- ples. Write to blind box “Looking...” ✍ TOYS & GAMES sexy wm,slim,wb,ll,40,seeks women who like wearing strap- ons.no std’s.30’s to 50’s,any size or ethnicity.write scrum- didly@gmail.com EXHIBITIONISTS 60 yo voyeur seeks mature exhibitionists (m/f/c). Lets sat- isfy our complementary pleas- ures in a safe, sane and dis- creet manner. Write to blind box “Exhibitionists” ✍ A PLEASANT SURPRISE Sensual, busty, pretty, atten- tive, sexy massage, tan, classy. Discreet. Wanna play? Couples? Eugene, Florence, Newport, Corvallis. Kristy. 337-7847 DOMINA/COMPANION MistressE, curvy, sexy & fun. 541-543-8558. DISCREET SEX DATES Meet locals looking for one night stands. Sign-up for free & get laid tonight! www.ORSexSearch.com. DESIREE’S ESCORTS Sexy, sweet, and seductive. Discreet, classy, and profes- sional. Your pleasure is our business. Desiree’s Escorts. 5 4 1 - 4 3 1 - 7 0 6 5 , www.desireesescorts.com. Indulge in your fantasies! A TRUE JEWEL Sultry 30 year young female, wavy blond hair, chocolate brown eyes, golden bronze skin, good listener, nonjudgmental, classy and sexy. Call me lets have some fun. Incall/outcall by apt. 541-543-0202. MADISON Redheaded, BBW, 42DD, 200 lbs. Sensual Erotic Xtacy. Mon- Sat, 10am-10pm. Incall only. 988-0562. SELF-SERVE ! If you've ever wanted to place an ad at 3am on Sunday, your dream has come true! classi- fieds.eugeneweekly.com • Divorce • Custody • Domestic Partners • Child Support “Low Cost, Free Consultation, Payment Plans” Jason D. Castanza 259 East 5th, Suite 200-f • Eugene, OR. 97401 (541) 221-2595 Savage Love WORDS OF PURE WISDOM by Dan Savage I’m in my final year of high school and I decided to come out as a lesbian—a very foolish move as I live in a small town that’s not exactly brimming with tolerant people. But I know there are other closeted people at my school and I figured if none of us ever take the first step, it won’t ever get any better around here. But the response from my peers was worse than I expected. It’s nothing too terrible, no physical violence, and in the beginning I could cope. But it’s been a while now and I guess I need some advice. It just isn’t getting better and I’m getting tired of it. I have to park two streets away so people don’t write shit on my car, someone’s hacked my user account and deleted important coursework, I’m either told I’m dressing like a dyke or trying to be a girl depending on what I choose to wear on any given day. I’m avoiding classes that I don’t have friends in because even if nothing is said (though it often is), the atmosphere is horrible. And none of this is that big a deal compared to what others have to go through, I know, but I’m sort of at the end of my tether. Reporting it to staff is useless because they just tell me there isn’t any proof and do fuck all. I’ve got some teachers looking out for me, but they can’t really do anything, either. I have some supportive friends, thank God, but it’s all just becoming a bit too much, and I need some advice on how to cope through the last few months until I can get out of this shithole town. Tired And Losing It Here’s what you need to do, TALI: Look in the mirror every morning and tell yourself that is the nadir, the bottom, the worst it’s ever going to get. Once you get out of your high school and out of your shithole hometown and get your ass off to college—to a big state school or private secular university—you won’t be the only out queer anymore. Hell, you’ll be surrounded by out fags and dykes and bisexuals. I can’t promise you that you’ll never encounter a bigot again, of course, or that all the fags and dykes you meet over the course of your life will be good people. But you will never again feel as vulnerable or persecuted or alone as you do right now. And while you’re talking to yourself in the mornings, TALI, tell yourself this, too: “Fuck my school, fuck my classmates, and fuck this town.” The shits conspiring to make you miserable, TALI, are unlikely to have lives anywhere near as interesting as the one on which you’re about to embark. Your classmates are making you miserable now because they know, deep down in their little black hearts, that their lives are going to be duller than day-old douche water compared to yours. Their lives aren’t going to be dull because they’re straight, TALI, but because the value they place on conformity—that’s the reason they feel they have a right to abuse you now—is a prison they’ve constructed around themselves. Right now they’re making you feel like an outcast, TALI, and the malice stings. But what exactly are they casting you out of? Your high school? Their asshole cliques? That shit town? You haven’t been cast out, TALI; you’ve been liberated. Freed. Sprung. I’m a 16-year-old gay boy. I grew up in an evangelical Christian home. Being the intel- ligent chap I am, I forgot to clear the history off the computer after looking at pornog- raphy one day last October. I got yelled at until I cried that night, and again the next morning, and every day for two weeks. I wasn’t allowed to use the computer for a year, and I was forced to attend church nightly. The electronics embargo has ended, so I can watch porn again at least, but I’ve been forced into the closet by my parents. They both ask me every night whether or not I have a girlfriend, whether or not there are any cute girls in my grade, stuff like that. My mom tears up every time I say that I don’t have a girlfriend. My dad sends me links to antigay articles that describe homosexuality as unnatural and an abomination. Once I made the mistake of sending an article back to him countering his points about homosexuality and he stormed into my room and broke both my cell phone and MP3 player in half. What the hell should I do about my parents? Will I ever be able to come out? Or will I have to lie to my parents and wait for them to die? Christian Parents Angrily Chastise Your parents—your vicious, clueless parents—are abusing their authority and their power, CPAC, which can make it tempting to fantasize about their deaths. Hell, I’m tempted to come over and kill them myself. But your only option right now, I’m sorry to say, is to lie to them. Tell your asshole parents what their assholes ears want to asshole hear: “It was just a phase, Mom and Dad, I was just curious, I’m totally straight, Jesus is the only dude I’ll ever get on my knees for, blah blah blah.” Get yourself a fag hag, delete gay web-browsing histories, create and refrain from deleting straight web-browsing his- tories, and bide your freakin’ time. In two short years you’ll be an adult, CPAC, and you’ll be able to come out to your mom and dad—and, even better, you’ll be able to tell them to suck it. Demand an apology for the emotional and spiritual violence they inflicted on you, CPAC, and if one isn’t forthcoming, refuse to see your parents or have anything to do with them until they apologize. They’re currently using all the leverage they have as parents to make sure you’re miserable—aka closeted—for the rest of your life. Once you’re an adult, CPAC, you’ll have to use the only leverage you have—your presence in their lives—to make them into the loving, respectful, supportive parents you deserve, deserved all along, and that it’s not too late for them to become. Four months ago, my mom walked in on me messing around with my boyfriend in our garage. I’m also a boy, age 15, and I hadn’t gotten around to coming out to my par- ents yet. I felt bad that my mom had to find out by seeing what she saw. I stayed in my room crying until my father came home. They called me down to the kitchen and told me they loved me and that they were very, very sorry if they had ever done or said any- thing that made me feel like I couldn’t be open with them about who I am. My boyfriend is 17. He came out to his parents at Christmas, and our parents met for the first time last night. We don’t have a question. We just wanted to thank you and thank all the other gay people who came out back when it was much tougher to do so. Our parents wouldn’t have reacted the way they did if it weren’t for all you guys that already came out. We’re Out Now Thanks for the sweet note, WON. It’s too bad that all teenagers, gay and straight, don’t have parents as loving and supportive as yours. WWW.EUGENEWEEKLY.COM WWW.EUGENEWEEKLY.COM • BLOGS.EUGENEWEEKLY.COM Download Savage Lovecast (my weekly podcast) every Tuesday at www.thestranger.com/savage. mail@savagelove.net EUGENE WEEKLY MARCH 13, 2008 47
