WALKING AT 5TH MKT
ALBERTSONS ON ROYAL
MASSAGE PARTNER
49 YO BI LEZ
walking behind you by
Steelhead when the puppy
stopped your tracks. beautiful
smile. you looked as though
you were wandering.. wander
to me? you-gorgeous red hair,
jeans, hiking backpack. i want
to take a long walk with you!
Mon, Feb 25, I asked you if you
had seen any cream of mush-
room soup. Wanted to ask you
out but didn’t know if appro-
priate. Dinner, Movie? Write to
blind box “Albertsons” ✍
Petite middle-age woman
looking to trade bi-weekly
massages with compatibly-
sized m or f. Have table? Write
to blind box “Massage” ✍
Newly single. Looking for fun,
bush mowing, mild b/d. Safe.
Discreet. No strings, drugs,
smoking, heavy drinking. Age,
gender unimportant. Must
love to give oral. 556 ✍
HOT GARDENER
Eugene Coffee Co., 18th &
Chambers. You: Excellent green
pants, adidas hat, adorable
smile. Me: soccer shorts. Come
here often? Meet me March
15th for free coffee?
GAIL
JUGGLING LESSON
Why would you want me to call
you, I’m ordered not to. Out of
all the things you’ve done
what hurts the worst is know-
ing we can’t be together. Once
trust is gone it can’t be
replaced.
“Texas” the juggler Feb. 8th at
the fairgrounds. You were both
my hands. You do indeed know
the secret. Thank you for a few
minutes of joy.
Thank you little love light for
leveling a limited life, now lift-
ed to laugh and be love.
I'M EASY
SOULSCYTHED
LIFE IS A BAGEL
I heard your hearty laugh and
had to smile to myself. Want to
go on a bike ride naked? Love
Pooter
Easy to place, easy to respond.
Look deep to find your desires
I LAHK POTATOES
SMILING HEARTS
To my Sexy Spanish Rockstar!
Rich or poor, I love you more
than anything! Yours Eternally,
Sunny Hunny Bunny!!
i see your stickers all over, but
not enough of you. find me, im
always at my spots. (and you
know my house is never locked...)
I saw you long ago at McKenzie
Photo in Springfield and Mt.
Pisgah too. Fabulous artist,
Brent B. Give us a call if you’re
around. 868-3686.
JOHN HENRYS STAGE
80’s night, wearing white A
frame, mini-mustache dancing
your heart out. Watching you
dance made me happy, hope to
see it again soon. Never put
away your dancing shoes.
TO B FROM K
I like being friends with U 2. Z
Big Bird? Cup O Joe? Cowboy
Jackson? Page boy? Please
behave.
GIRL AT BUFFALO
you melt me and i dont even
know you i geuss its your smile
and positive attitude. you
make portlands buffalo seem
pathetic.. pool?
KEVIN
Thank you again for returning
my phone....Your good karma
abounds!! Jessika
SWEET LIFE
We made awesome eye con-
tact at Sweet life, I just came
from Tango, sport coat, black
shirt, you were working. I want
to know you. call me... David -
trytogetalong@hotmail.com
LOOKING FOR BBW
dwm, 45, looking for bbw, 30-
55, for discrete love making
sessions. will do almost any-
thing, including oral, write to
blind box “looking for bbw”. ✍
SEEKING FRIENDS
I’m in a lonely place in life,
and I’d like to reach out to
new people & places to fill
that gap. I love to write, send
pictures and put a smile on
someone else’s face. If your in
need of a new friend, I’m your
guy. I’m 23, 6’, green eyes.
Write to blind box “Seeking
friends” ✍
BALLROOM DANCE
Good follow ISO good lead for
intermediate level social ball-
room dance. Current favorites:
cha cha, night club 2-step,
samba, rumba, swing, waltz,
zydeco. Sense of humor
required. Write to blind box
“Ballroom Dance” ✍
HIKING BUDDY
Lookin for male or female hik-
ing companion. Medium to dif-
ficult, possible mountain
climbing in the spring. Write to
blind box “Hiking Buddy”✍
GET EUCHRED!
Join other euchre players every
monday night. 6-handed game,
way cool! drew@playful.com
LOST IN TIME
White boy convict, 28 yo, good
heart, solid mind, lots of
charisma,
looking
for
fun/exciting females to corre-
spond with. Write to blind box
“Lost in time” ✍
Married man missing warm
hugs and kisses. HWP, funny,
witty, sarcastic and shaved
head. Would love to share pas-
sion and romance. Lets start
with coffee and muffin. Write
to blind box “Friendly Fling” ✍
I NEED A MISTRESS
Need a mistress to please!
Height, Weight, race, looks are
of course unimportant, only
the desire to be pleased! Email
robert
at:
roblar454@yahoo.com
WANT TO SHARE?
LOVE BUG
SXY BLONDE 4 BLACK
Sexy, thin, blonde housewife
seeking endowed black male
to help husband fulfill fantasy.
Ever wanted to do another
man’s sexy wife? email baby-
blonde@comcast.net. We’re for
real! You be too!
FRIENDLY FLING
Straight couple seeking sec-
ond wife. Must be tolerant of
indoor pets and smoking. Want
to share? Write to blind box
“Want to share?”
I saw you first!! All these chad’s
need to step down off my Love
bug yam Taki.!? Love you. ()
NEED FAB ARTIST
CHUCKLES
Daylyn, Chuckles is looking for
you. Looking for your face in
every crowd. And every
blocked cell phone number for
your voice. 760-553-4555.
HORNY BI-MALE
Looking for new and exciting
sexual adventures. I’m a SWM
39 HWP open to just about any-
thing. All shapes, sizes and col-
ors welcum! Write to blind box
“Horny Bi-male” ✍
GET ON IT!
Wm looking for female swing
partner, 40’s-50’s. Must be
bold, funny, open to anything
sexual. One on one, three-
somes, swaping.. n/s, lite
drinker, std free. Write to blind
box “Get on it!” ✍
LOOKING.....
28 yo, bimale, currently a con-
vict that goes home soon.
Looking for friendship or sex
buddies. Women, men, or cou-
ples. Write to blind box
“Looking...” ✍
TOYS & GAMES
sexy wm,slim,wb,ll,40,seeks
women who like wearing strap-
ons.no std’s.30’s to 50’s,any
size or ethnicity.write scrum-
didly@gmail.com
EXHIBITIONISTS
60 yo voyeur seeks mature
exhibitionists (m/f/c). Lets sat-
isfy our complementary pleas-
ures in a safe, sane and dis-
creet manner. Write to blind
box “Exhibitionists” ✍
A PLEASANT SURPRISE
Sensual, busty, pretty, atten-
tive, sexy massage, tan, classy.
Discreet. Wanna play? Couples?
Eugene, Florence, Newport,
Corvallis. Kristy. 337-7847
DOMINA/COMPANION
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541-543-8558.
DISCREET SEX DATES
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brown eyes, golden bronze skin,
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lbs. Sensual Erotic Xtacy. Mon-
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988-0562.
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Savage Love
WORDS OF PURE WISDOM by Dan Savage
I’m in my final year of high school and I decided to come out as a lesbian—a very
foolish move as I live in a small town that’s not exactly brimming with tolerant people.
But I know there are other closeted people at my school and I figured if none of us ever
take the first step, it won’t ever get any better around here. But the response from my
peers was worse than I expected. It’s nothing too terrible, no physical violence, and in
the beginning I could cope. But it’s been a while now and I guess I need some advice. It
just isn’t getting better and I’m getting tired of it. I have to park two streets away so
people don’t write shit on my car, someone’s hacked my user account and deleted
important coursework, I’m either told I’m dressing like a dyke or trying to be a girl
depending on what I choose to wear on any given day. I’m avoiding classes that I don’t
have friends in because even if nothing is said (though it often is), the atmosphere is
horrible. And none of this is that big a deal compared to what others have to go
through, I know, but I’m sort of at the end of my tether.
Reporting it to staff is useless because they just tell me there isn’t any proof and do
fuck all. I’ve got some teachers looking out for me, but they can’t really do anything,
either. I have some supportive friends, thank God, but it’s all just becoming a bit too
much, and I need some advice on how to cope through the last few months until I can
get out of this shithole town.
Tired And Losing It
Here’s what you need to do, TALI: Look in the mirror every morning and tell yourself
that is the nadir, the bottom, the worst it’s ever going to get. Once you get out of your
high school and out of your shithole hometown and get your ass off to college—to a big
state school or private secular university—you won’t be the only out queer anymore. Hell,
you’ll be surrounded by out fags and dykes and bisexuals. I can’t promise you that you’ll
never encounter a bigot again, of course, or that all the fags and dykes you meet over
the course of your life will be good people. But you will never again feel as vulnerable or
persecuted or alone as you do right now.
And while you’re talking to yourself in the mornings, TALI, tell yourself this, too:
“Fuck my school, fuck my classmates, and fuck this town.” The shits conspiring to make
you miserable, TALI, are unlikely to have lives anywhere near as interesting as the one
on which you’re about to embark. Your classmates are making you miserable now
because they know, deep down in their little black hearts, that their lives are going to be
duller than day-old douche water compared to yours. Their lives aren’t going to be dull
because they’re straight, TALI, but because the value they place on conformity—that’s
the reason they feel they have a right to abuse you now—is a prison they’ve constructed
around themselves.
Right now they’re making you feel like an outcast, TALI, and the malice stings. But
what exactly are they casting you out of? Your high school? Their asshole cliques? That
shit town? You haven’t been cast out, TALI; you’ve been liberated. Freed. Sprung.
I’m a 16-year-old gay boy. I grew up in an evangelical Christian home. Being the intel-
ligent chap I am, I forgot to clear the history off the computer after looking at pornog-
raphy one day last October. I got yelled at until I cried that night, and again the next
morning, and every day for two weeks. I wasn’t allowed to use the computer for a year,
and I was forced to attend church nightly. The electronics embargo has ended, so I can
watch porn again at least, but I’ve been forced into the closet by my parents. They both
ask me every night whether or not I have a girlfriend, whether or not there are any cute
girls in my grade, stuff like that. My mom tears up every time I say that I don’t have a
girlfriend. My dad sends me links to antigay articles that describe homosexuality as
unnatural and an abomination. Once I made the mistake of sending an article back to
him countering his points about homosexuality and he stormed into my room and broke
both my cell phone and MP3 player in half.
What the hell should I do about my parents? Will I ever be able to come out? Or will I
have to lie to my parents and wait for them to die?
Christian Parents Angrily Chastise
Your parents—your vicious, clueless parents—are abusing their authority and their
power, CPAC, which can make it tempting to fantasize about their deaths. Hell, I’m
tempted to come over and kill them myself. But your only option right now, I’m sorry to
say, is to lie to them. Tell your asshole parents what their assholes ears want to asshole
hear: “It was just a phase, Mom and Dad, I was just curious, I’m totally straight, Jesus is
the only dude I’ll ever get on my knees for, blah blah blah.” Get yourself a fag hag, delete
gay web-browsing histories, create and refrain from deleting straight web-browsing his-
tories, and bide your freakin’ time.
In two short years you’ll be an adult, CPAC, and you’ll be able to come out to your
mom and dad—and, even better, you’ll be able to tell them to suck it. Demand an apology
for the emotional and spiritual violence they inflicted on you, CPAC, and if one isn’t
forthcoming, refuse to see your parents or have anything to do with them until they
apologize. They’re currently using all the leverage they have as parents to make sure
you’re miserable—aka closeted—for the rest of your life. Once you’re an adult, CPAC,
you’ll have to use the only leverage you have—your presence in their lives—to make them
into the loving, respectful, supportive parents you deserve, deserved all along, and that
it’s not too late for them to become.
Four months ago, my mom walked in on me messing around with my boyfriend in
our garage. I’m also a boy, age 15, and I hadn’t gotten around to coming out to my par-
ents yet. I felt bad that my mom had to find out by seeing what she saw. I stayed in my
room crying until my father came home. They called me down to the kitchen and told
me they loved me and that they were very, very sorry if they had ever done or said any-
thing that made me feel like I couldn’t be open with them about who I am.
My boyfriend is 17. He came out to his parents at Christmas, and our parents met for
the first time last night. We don’t have a question. We just wanted to thank you and
thank all the other gay people who came out back when it was much tougher to do so.
Our parents wouldn’t have reacted the way they did if it weren’t for all you guys that
already came out.
We’re Out Now
Thanks for the sweet note, WON. It’s too bad that all teenagers, gay and straight,
don’t have parents as loving and supportive as yours.
WWW.EUGENEWEEKLY.COM
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Download Savage Lovecast (my weekly podcast) every Tuesday at www.thestranger.com/savage.
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EUGENE WEEKLY
MARCH 13, 2008 47