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About Eugene weekly. (Eugene, Oregon) 1993-current | View Entire Issue (Aug. 28, 2003)
TO THE EDITOR BY TOM LININGER How the Grinch Stole Labor Day The rise and fall of Bill Sizemore. A ll the workers in Oregon loved Labor Day a lot But the Grinch, who lived just north of Salem, did not. The Grinch hated unions! He hated Labor Day! Now please don’t ask why. No one really can say. It could be his head wasn’t screwed on just right. It could be perhaps that his shoes were too tight. But I think that the reason for most of his hate Was his campaign for governor in 1998 When the Grinch’s backside was left black and blue By unions like OEA and OPEU. Whatever the reason, his shoes or his pride, The unions made the Grinch feel angry inside. Staring down from his cave with a sour, Grinchy smirk At the union employees returning from work, He growled, with his Grinch fingers nervously drumming, “I must find a way to stop Labor Day from coming!” He shuddered to think of the Labor Day cheer, With hot dogs and burgers and cheap domestic beer. Then the Grinch got an idea. An awful idea! The Grinch got a wonderful, awful idea! “We’ll see if those workers will still celebrate When I propose Measures 92 and 98.” He climbed down their chimneys while they lay a-snooze And then he slunk off with their union dues. He took all the dues on his sled to Mt. Crumpit And rushed to the top, getting ready to dump it, When off in the distance he heard a faint noise – He hoped it was crying by worker girls and boys. The Grinch longed to hear their sobs and boo-hoos When they learned he’d taken away all their dues. But this wasn’t a sound of a sorrowful sort. It seemed more like cheers coming out of a court. The reason the workers were joyously cheering Was a $2 million verdict for civil racketeering. W hat happened then? Well, in Oregon they say, That the Grinch’s legal trouble grew three sizes that day. In August 2003, the Grinch was served With a personal lawsuit he richly deserved. The Grinch could not stop Labor Day! It came! The workers were carrying on just the same. On Monday they celebrated instead of working While the Grinch in his cave was sullenly lurking, Holding his hands over both of his ears, And he … HE HIMSELF! … drank cheap domestic beers. Tom Lininger is a UO law professor and former county commissioner. 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Riel, Jolene Thompson, Will Thornton, Pedalers Express Printing Signature Graphics HOW TO REACH US BY E-MAIL: (letters): editor@eugeneweekly.com (advertising): ads@eugeneweekly.com (classifieds): classy@eugeneweekly.com (personals): romance@eugeneweekly.com (calendar): cal@eugeneweekly.com (music/clubs/special shows): music@eugeneweekly.com (art/openings/galleries): visualarts@eugeneweekly.com (performance/theater): performance@eugeneweekly.com (literary arts/readings): books@eugeneweekly.com (movies/film screenings): movies@eugeneweekly.com (circulation): distribution@eugeneweekly.com Locally owned and independent since 1982, now with 91,000 regular readers. 6 AUGUST 28, 2003 ronment that they support are gone, no one will be able to put them back. Not in our life- time, if ever. Susan Stricker Eugene CONAN THE GOVERNOR Arnold Schwarzenegger’s candidacy for the governorship of the state of California is both ridiculous and an extremely dangerous precedent. In March, the Terminator went to Washington for a personal meeting with Karl Rove. It was said “politics was not discussed.” Later, when this recall nonsense began in earnest, Rove was asked his opinion of a pos- sible Schwarzenegger candidacy for governor. He said, “It would be very, very nice.” Arnie has worked hard over the last 10 years to style himself a “conservative,” while projecting his usual attitude of powerful arro- gance. He obviously reads the script from Washington, since he has no real experience in any kind of government service. Conan the Barbarian doesn’t count, I’m afraid. California has the fifth largest economy in the world, even in the shaky condition that it’s in. The neocons in the Executive Branch and the corporations they service will use Schwarzenegger as a puppet politico to loot the rest of California’s economy in the same fashion that Enron looted the power generat- ing business there. The people will cheer him on at first. Then, when the state economy goes totally in the dumper, the neocons will drop him like a hot rock. The empire has no friends, only future victims. If California’s economy melts down, what do you think will happen to Oregon’s? It will be the same thing that’s happened to every other area of the country that’s been looted by our Corporatist government — real crummy jobs with long hours at low wages — if we’re lucky. Quality of life? Hasta la vista, baby! Michael Anderson Eugene GOOD GAS, BAD GAS I just returned from a business trip to California. When I crossed the border from Brookings to California, the price of gas jumped nearly 30 cents per gallon. And, of course, I had to pump my own gas. I found gas prices in San Francisco to be hovering at $2 per gallon. And I had to pump my own gas. On the return trip along I-5, the gas prices dropped 25 cents per gallon from California to Oregon. And I did not have to pump gas! Anyone still think that gas would be cheaper if we had to pump it ourselves? Anyone think the gas stations would not ab- sorb the profit and leave us pumping our own gas at higher prices? You do? Then move to California! Pete Giberson Eugene A CLOSER READ The Lane County Bill of Rights Defense Committee honors and takes seriously Thomas Jefferson’s profound observation that “the price of Freedom is eternal vigi- lance.” Have you actually read the text of the USA PATRIOT Act (UPA)? If you have you will know why Hawaii, Alaska and Vermont Darin J. Ward DDS PC, F.A.G.D. Fellow of the Academy of General Dentistry Health Centered Dentistry 300 Country Club Rd. Ste. 290 Eugene, OR 97401 At Health Centered Dentistry, we focus on your overall wellness. By taking a holistic approach and arranging for health rather than merely treating disease, we offer an opportunity to restore your oral health to its optimum. We look at the whole picture, consider systemic health and underlying factors, and take steps to perfect your smile while preventing problems before they occur. Friendly faces welcome you in a relaxing, stress-free environment to ensure you are as comfortable as possible. Call today and experience the benefits we offer with the extraordinary people and unique setting only Health Centered Dentistry can provide. (541) 686-2441
