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About The Clackamas print. (Oregon City, Oregon) 1989-2019 | View Entire Issue (June 2, 2004)
The Clackamas Print . 9 , 2004 indvik delivers all but consistency Jennifer Trank T he C lackamas P rint INTERNET PHOTO Four “Angry Housewives Eating BSh Bons,” a novel that explores the var ious roles of women and their rela tionships with both their friends and families, is somewhat less of a treat to read than the bon bons in the tide would be to eat While perusing this saga by Lorna Landvik, the reader faces a bumpy struggle to -find rhythm in her writing. Landvik introduces five women—neighbors on Frcesia Court, a dead-end street in Minneapolis—who start a book club and become lifelong friends. Kari, the oldest of the group, loses her husband prematurely to illness and longs for the baby they were never able to conceive. Audrey, the Jeff Sorensen T he C lackamas P rint Jr » Mailed the StcsiÀ. Taurus (Apr 2k) - May 20) You will get intm.aWBfitJhcstinv situa -raj? tion involving a .bafhmb full of gelatin, a fScUH Jpd a hamster named HaroW-L^ B|Jun 21) You Iggtential angst ¡Bl understand Iangst. ft Bic speaking in the first person seem to be less central to the story than some of those presented in the third. While most readers are likely to be drawn to one or more of the women, sortie characters are not developed enough to captivate the reader’s interest or compassion. It is also difficult to relate completely to one character or another, as they tend not to deviate from the person ality given to them by Landvik, mak ing them a bit unbelievable. In addition, each main character has so many children and other fam ily members they are difficult to keep straight without slowing to a snail’s pace when reading about a neighbor hood barbecue or Christmas party. It’s'tough at times to remember, for example, whether Grant is Audrey’s son or her gay neighbor. Although it may take a while (the first hundred pages or so) to be drawn into the novel and feel com pelled to reach for the book to see what happens next——it eventually provides sufficient entertainment to encourage the reader through the four-hundred-plus pages. While not masterfully written, it is fre quently engag ing, occasion ally touching and seldom a bore. “Angry Housewives Eating Bon Bons” can be purchased online or at most book stores for $13.95. LANDVIK Screenplay proves to be true disaster as Emmerich can't weather own storm Horoscope for today flatneA self-proclaimed sex expert, is fun loving and a bit on the wild side Slip is a spunky political activist with the strength of an ox. Merit is an insecure beauty who suffers the abuse of her husband in silence. And Faith, who seems normal on the surface, hides the misery of a past life filled with disappointment and shame. The novel follows the lives of these women from their youth to old age, spanning births of children, ends of marriages and deaths of loved ones. The love of good friends and a plate of brownies assuage many of life’s crises. The most troubling aspect of this novel is that Landvik wrote in the third person for some characters and the first for others. This is not only confusing, but seems to have no logic, as some of the characters Cancer (Jun 22 - Jul 22) In a moment ofidWWghtcnment, you will tta Jblank essay. Unfortuni(tGh',^^ty instructor will be nd^u^^^rhtened nor amused. 2|O|g.22) You will prophecy O^^PKW“no pants” Virgo (Aug j&^&CP 22) Time to get a new ^ni^Tij*ci’>Uipani<>n this month (<|||i’i ¡ e I m ask about what happened 8n ypur pet ham ster Harold). ' fig|f*Wct 23) You taxdflhanSial risks this numbers are «■tad 7. Scorpio will gain (fame. Watch “Amcrica|| IjMf1! wanted” for details. . iS i^^r 22 - Dee 21) ly will be the e®scxle of “Jerry Capricorn (Dec 22 - Jan 19) You will read \fetir?hftaasW>pe today. KtfW Feb 18) Who Mhflwye was just a Pisces (Feb 19 Mar 20) You will find happiness ui the only place sonjfenm 1^0 you can— the dictiomtiy. 21) Yoi| iote: James Tombe is not a real doctor, and therefore should not e taken seriously. Any actions based on these predictions are [olely thetpoor choice of the reader, and will warrant nothing iiss than Condescending snickers from the staff of this paper. “The Day After TomtMhir’’was written and directed by Roland Emmerich, the man who iMuvht us “Stargatc” ' and “Indllfcndencc Day,” and the film sSH “The Rookie” himself, Dennis^Riaid. So the question is: What thejlfcck hap pened? Conceptually, this mc^B has all the necessary elements W* a good natural disaster flick. A tawjfed cast, a promising director ancha method for destroying the world Hit hasn’t been done in recent mdMBry. The trouble is, as it has been saH writers shouldn’t direct, and ^»rectors should never write. As director, writer antjjproduccr, Emmerich seems to havIKirgottcn this. Scene after scene is IKturbing- ly reminiscent of his ‘‘M and ‘96 alien films. Upon further research, tri fact, it appears that the \ ast majority of the camera angles and move ments were identical. The movie begins with a scene where our hero, the dashing, distin guished meteorologist from Washington, JD.C., nearly falls to his doom from a perilous crack in ihe - glacier vvherd he arid his felljiw doc- tor-types have sef'Etp camp. He pro ceeds to nrcscn.this findings.in front of several ksatfets of the world and urges t^rfffto .to-prevent the next ice .igc,prcsuy 'ably anywhere from Wfr to '1'XXkl' ■years away. K Meanwhile, the doctor’s son, who has joined -an academic t||rkith)pn team for private school, leaves for New York to comp&tq alongside the beautiful girl he joined the team forin the first place and th<sfc< bnlliant-yet-quirky teammate. '><< Meanwhile, baaBui IT®» our hero finds himself begging tBpres- ident to reconsider allowing him access to the computirigSiftnology he needs to determine exactly when , this disaster is going to occur. Meanwhile, the doctor api his about six to eight months away. Did they say six to eight months? Oops, they meat»: six to eight days. Then wc see a series of manda tory “di|istcrous” events (like *gasp* rain!) as the doctor’s son gets trapped i® the New York Public library with his friends and they fight to keep warm. Meanwhile, the meteorologist’s I wife, a doctor at a cancer research Land treatmlnt facility, talks to her ’ SO-year-oSgpaticnt about the “trip” , ■is narey have taken to an ^unknownjlland for an unexplained reason while he reads “Peter Pan,” the story pf the boy who never wanted toiow Up. To be flank, the writing was so incrediblwicdundant that it’s hard to accepflfls a decent screenplay, even by ¿Hollywood standards. Fmmcrichjias produced incredible sci-fi movies in the past, but with ^gdits ^»‘Godzilla.” it’s a wonder he didn’t figure it out before. '• said ... writers should out, through hours (minutes) of never direct, and directors like research that the coming “ice age” is Emmerich should never, ever write actually not 100 years away; it’s ... unless there ate aliens. . d| rt||l ■ " BUY ANY ENTREE GET ONE CHITA L & GRILL— 72 OFF (of equal or lesser value) Any Day of the Week 0 S. Molalla Ave. Oregon City 3-557-0277 mile north of CCC BREAKFAST LUNCH DINNER Not Valid on Specials or with Any Other Offer. Only With Coupon. Dine-in Only. Expires: 6-8-04 INTERNET PHOTO Media heartthrob Jake Gyllenhaal (FRONT, CENTER) plays Sam Hall, with newcomer Emmy Rossum (RIGHT) as love interest Laura Chapman. The couple, having nearly been washed away with a taxi cab, run up the steps of the New York Public Library from a tidal wave.
