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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 3, 2007)
___________________________________________________________________ AUGUST 3, 2007 ing and treatment for sexually transmitted diseases, Gay Men Who Have Lost Their Partners meets at Soyboys Vegetarian Men's Group is a fun, social HIV testing and hepatitis A and B vaccinations By the West Cafe to provide an opportunity for conversa appointment or walk-in. Most insurance plans accept ed; sliding-scale fee Se habla espahol (9 am-4 30pm Monday-Friday except 12 30-4 30 pm Wednesday 426 SW Stark St., Sixth Floor 503-988-3700.) tion and socializing. The death need not have occurred gathering for gay and bi men who are interested in a healthy vegetarian or vegan lifestyle. A variety of recently. (7:30 pm second Wednesday Jefferson St 503-701-9376 ) 1201 SW activities and monthly potlucks on the last Saturday (veggieguys@aol com) Genealogy group forming. Gather with other lesbian researchers to trace your family tree and tackle "bnck- Women of the Rivers, the Portland/Vancouver chapter of the Women on Wheels Motorcycle Club, meets wall* female ancestors (famhistnw@aol com ) monthly at Elmer's, sponsors riding clinics and takes SOCIAL Arts & Music Confluence: The Willamette Valley Mixed GALA Chorus rehearses Sundays at Unitarian Umversalist Congregation of Salem. (4-6:30 pm 5090 Center St NE Happy Ours Productions is a grassroots group dedicat day tnps (7 15 pm second Thursday 9848 N Whitaker ed to building the visibility, community participation and Road www womenoftherivers org.) collective leadership of lesbian women of color through a wide variety of social, networking, consciousness raising and action-oriented activities, events and Physical Recreation 503-364-2370 confluence@aol com www confluence projects, (www happyoursproductions com) Adventure Group organizes a variety of activities chorus org.) Imperial Sovereign Rose Court of Oregon is the old Creative Connection (formerly Real Connection) is est gay, lesbian, bi and trans socialdund-ratsing organ ization in the state of Oregon. Meetings are the first two Mondays of each month (www rosecourt org) year round, including hiking, walking, cross-country and downhill skiing, rafting and mountain biking. a social gathering for gay men who are artists, writers or musicians or who pursue some creative activity. Noncommercial, nonjudgmental; supporting personal creativity for novices and professionals alike. Monthly potlucks on the second Friday (7 pm. Carl 503-284 2971.) Film discussion group forming for gay, bi and trans men. Share your perspective regarding portrayals of sexual minority men in current films. Monthly activities include group tfilmtalk@verizon.net.) outings to see zlilms. * Foreign Film Group meets every second and fourth Sunday to screen foreign films at various venues, fol Jewish Gay Men's Group please call for meeting time and place. (503-246-5939 efraimlevi@aol.com) Keshet is a social connection group for queer Jews and their spouses, partners, significant others and good friends, whether Jewish or not. It meets month ly for potluck dinners and special events. (David ‘ 503-226-7079, ext. 14, or Mike 503-331-1111.) (PO Box Portland, 2201, OR 97208-2201 www adventuregroup. org.) Amazon Dragons Paddling Club invites women 16 and older to join Portland's only out lesbian dragon boat team Be part of the fun and fitness with this dynamic group, (wwwamazondragons.org.) The Forest Group outings are cooperative adventures for women. Participants are responsible for providing their own equipment and choosing outings appropriate for their skill and fitness level All skill levels welcome. Lesbian Garden Club is a group of women who love (503-772-1860 imnoregon@comcast.net wwwgeo gardens and gardening. They exchange plants, seeds, cities.com/ncc 1127/forestpdx) advice and encouragement while having a good time Call for a copy of the newsletter and information about Gay Men s Walking Group invites gay, bi and ques upcoming events (Linda 503-909-2002) tionmg men to stroll in various neighborhoods around Portland for fun, friendship and exercise. (10 am Portland Gay Men s Chorus is open to singers, Lesbians with Degrees is a social group that was Saturday Tom 503-984-4549) support members and volunteers. 1503-226-2588 www.pdxgmc.org.) started for degreed women, but no degree is neces sary. Just come and join the fun! Pool parties, lowed by a group discussion, (pdxgayfilm@yahoocom.) Gay Women's GoH Group welcomes all levels of play ers. (www turfgirlz.com.) Portland Lesbian Choir is an informal, nonaudition Scrabble and more (Lam 503-233-3557 Join listserv community chorus for women of all ages to sing, at LesbianswOegrees subscribe@yahoogroups com.) Lesbian Equestrian Group gets together for equestrian socialize and share songs, melodies and talents. Directed by Ray Elliot, a talented and experienced Lulu's Pervy Playhouse is a social group for self activities in the Pacific identifying women who are into S/M Play parties are 503 654 3865 Lynn 503 777 2339 ketrav@rdrop com) Northwest. (Denise leader. New members welcome to rehearsals at Ainsworth United Church of Christ on an open enroll (503-231-3992 dykedadi@comcast.net www lulus Net Rippers is a gay men s indoor soccer team that's just starting up in Portland. (bendoverbeckham@ ment through fall 2006. (6:30-8:30 pm Wednesday. pervyplayhouse org.) gmail com www myspace. com/netrippers.) Men Over 40 is a small, socially supportive group that meets second and fourth Thursdays. (503-777 1376 ) Out Dancing teaches dancing for same sex couples at Ankeny Street Studio. Classes for different dance styles Night in Black Leather and The Leather Ouck Club are the first and third Friday of each month at Gail's start the first Friday of each month: country, swing, tango, cha cha, etc. Call for schedule (503 236-5129 2941 NE Ainsworth St 503-727-3306 portlandlesbian choir@hotmail. com. www. plchoir, org.) Rose City Gay Freedom Band is a performance group for queers and supportive friends of varying musical skill levels with annual fall and spring concerts. Subgroups include the Rose City Swing band and a held on the Saturday second of the month. Dirty Duck Tavern. (9 pm-midmght 439 NW Third Ave out dancmg@yahoo com home att net/-outdancing) 503-224-8446 orleatherfrat@yahoo. corn! OutKayaking. Portland's gay and lesbian sea kayak (503 790-2170 mfo@rcgfb org. www.rcgfb.org.) Oregon Men Enjoying Naturism is a social organization for gay male natunsts/nudists. Social gathering second group, explores the lakes, rivers and bays of north west Oregon and southwest Washington, (www out marching band with flag corps. Come join us! Satori Men's Chorus welcomes new members of all Saturday of every month, (omenpdx@omenpdx.org. kayakmg.org.) ages and races, regardless of sexual orientation or www omenpdx org) musical background, to join Wednesday rehearsals. No audition necessary. (503-299-4454 www. satori PDX FTM is a social group for female-to-male trans PDX Pride Bowling League is recruiting for fun games Friday nights September through April. men and their significant others, friends, families and (info@pdxpridebowl. com.) chorus.org.) General allies, (groups yahoo. com/group/PDX_FTM.) Portland The gay Pinochle Group meets Sundays at Hobo's Come play cards and meet the gang. New players Association is in its 28th season! Meets Sundays at always welcome. (6 pm Asian b Pacific Islander Lesbians and Gays is a non 120 NW Third Ave Mike Gay b Lesbian Community Bowling Hollywood Bowl. Drop-ins welcome anytime. (3:30 pm 4030 NE Halsey St Mailing address PO Box 42034, Portland, OR 97242 503 722 0438 pdxbowl@ 503-641 -7224) profit community voice for gay, lesbian and bi Asian and Comcast net www pdxbowl com) al outings and cultural events. Friendly environment to Poder Latino is a nonprofit social community voice group for gay, lesbian, bi and trans people that reach meet and connect with other API. (PO Box 12661, es out to Latinos and Latinas by organizing events and Tubman Middle School. All skill levels welcome! Portland, OR 97232. aplgjtdx@yahoo.com.) retreats and advocating HIV prevention. Meets every other Monday at Outside In. (6:30pm 1030 SW 13th hoops@yahoo. com.) Pacific Islanders. Activities include potlucks, recreation Bad Girts is a social and educational leather and B/D/S/M club for self-identified women with an empha sis on safety and education. Workshops, discussions, events and parties. Women of all orientations can connect and ask questions during the Kinky Women's Welcoming Munch at 7 pm every second Tuesday Border Riders Motorcycle Club provides social oppor tunities for gay men interested in recreational motorcy cle touring and promotes education on safe and legal machinery (503-281 4488. brmcprez@yahoo com.) Cascade Flyers are gay, lesbian and bi aviators, both private and professional, in Washington, Oregon and southern Bntish Columbia Dinner meetings in Portland (503-701-7922 Portland Leather Alliance is one of the largest pan- sexual, nonprofit B/D/S/M, leather and fetish lifestyle casflyers@yahoo.com www. geocities com/casflyers) A Common Bond is a social support network for former or questioning Jehovah's Witnesses who are queer (acbportland@webtv.net.) Coqsure is a social group for people who were assigned a female sex at birth but identify otherwise (female-to- male, genderqueer, drag king, etc ). First Sunday meet ings are open to partners and families of any configura tion. (503-471-1515. groups yahoo com/group/coqsure.) Dungeon Men PDX hosts a men's S/M party every (7:30-9:30 pm Monday. 2231 N Flint Ave pdxgay Whether you're a running novice or a seasoned marathoner, Portland Frontrunners welcomes gay, lesbian, bi and trans people of all abilities and organizations in the Northwest. Regular social and interests educational opportunities, including KinkFest, Leather www portlandfrontrunners.org) Ball and Fall Vendors Fair, (www pdxleatheralliance org) (503-972-2231 www.pdxbadgirls net) area Ave Hugo 503-997-8615 or Audencio 503-261 5463) Portland Gay Basketball Association practices at (Gary mfo@portlandfrontrunnersorg largest gay sports organization, for open and women’s for potluck and socializing Meet men into a leather lifestyle and keep abreast of leather happenings. No divisions of slow-pitch softball Regular season games are played throughout the summer at Gordon Faber leather socialization for the past 21 years (360-896-6665. plm@direcway.com.) Recreational Complex in Hillsboro All levels of experi ence are welcome (4450 NW 229th Ave. www. rosecitysoftball org) Portland Lesbian Book Club gathers monthly to chat Rosetown Ramblers, Portland's gay and lesbian about a chosen book or to attend selected events. square dance club, dances at mainstream and plus (6:30 pm third Tuesday groups yahoo.com/group/port levels. (PO Box 5352, Portland, OR 97228 5352 landlesbianbookclub) www rosetownramblers, com.) Portland Lesbian Network organizes brewpub visits, Ruby Red Flippers, a group of gay and lesbian scuba golf events, hiking, kayaking, cycling, Scrabble games and movie nights and keeps you aware of what's going divers in the Portland area, teaches new recruits and takes dives in Tacoma, Hood Canal and other Pacific on in the area (PDXLesbianNetwork-subscribe@ yahoogroups com.) www. rubyredflippers org) Northwest waters. (rjbyredflippers@yahoocom. Portland Metro Prime Timers is a social group for She Rocks, a supportive rock climbing group for mature gay men and those who appreciate them, coming together for social, educational and cultural lesbians 18 and older, organizes year-round climbing and training events chosen according to skill level. Monthly meetings are held at Bagdad Pub purposes. (PO Box 5884, Portland, OR 97228 503-286-4613 or 360-693-5506 pdxprimetimers@ (6:30-7:30 pm second Thursday 3702 SE Hawthorne novices always welcome. (503-281-2076 bighnboy@ aracnet.com.) yahoo com www geocities com/pdxprimetimers) Blvd www sherocks. wetpaint com.) Rainriders Motorcycle Club meets weekly at the Team Tennis meets Sundays at University of Portland F.A.G. POX (Femme Affinity Group Portland), a radical Roxy. Ride your bike or just come meet the group other month in a Portland dungeon Masters and activist and social group open to self-identified femmes Everyone welcome. (10 am Sunday 1121 SW Stark St. All levels of play welcome. First time is free, subse quent times are $7. Please join us! (8 am-noon of all genders, seeks to create solidarity among femmes, promote femme visibility and combat femmephobia in www. pdxrrmc. com.) 503- 788-8192 teamportlandtenms@yahoo com) the community at large (wwwnotsorryorg/fagpdx) Rose City Discussion Club, the largest open pansexual/alternative sexuality club in the Northwest, third Saturday of the month. (4-7 pm 503 642-3360 or is open to all orientations, fetishes and lifestyles that are safe, sane and consensual. Monthly meetings, 503-288-1870 sutaytig@aol.com) workshops and newsletter. (503-972-1869 rcdc@ 50+ lesbian social group for women meets on the FTM Pacific NW OR b WA is a social and discussion group for female-to-male trans (groups yahoo com/group/FTM PacificNW) men. teleport.com wwwrcdc.org) Sappho Social Club is a group of women 40 years and older building community through social and cultural activities. (thesapphosocialclub@yahoo com ) YOUTH Children of Lesbians and Gays Everywhere (COLAGE) is the only international organization specif ically supporting young people with sexual minority parents (colage@lmfamilyorg www colage org) Pride Project brings together Washington County queer older as well as their fnends and loved ones, holds potlucks on the second Saturday of each month (flataps meeting people and doing activities other than bar @yahoo com) hopping. (kyleinportland@yahoo.com.) austm @prideproject org. ) Social OUTings is a social group for all interested in Just Out is published on the first and third Friday of every month The deadline for submissions is 14 days prior to publication OutReach listings of up to 50 words are provided free of charge to organizations and groups specifically serving the sexual minorities community All listings are subject to editing, and inclusion is subject To space limitations, relevance and receipt by dead line Listings expire once a year (in July), and submissions run from the date received until the npxt scheduled expiration date Listings are automatically deleted upon expira Reunion provides perfect opportunity for fearful woman to tiptoe out of the closet D ear M s . B ehavior : 1 am 47 and have been in a relationship with a woman for 10 years, but 1 own a business tn a homo- phobic industry, so I am not out. 1 am going to my Seven Sisters college reunion next month, and feel like this event will be a way for me to test the waters and come out. Then, after reunion weekend, my wife strongly wants me to come out in all areas of my life; she believes our rela tionship is being compromised by my “dishonesty.” However, she is pushing me too hard. 1 am afraid to come out: 1 am afraid that people will reject me and that my business will be ruined. 1 am afraid that my life will fall apart. Intellectually, 1 know this is irrational, but 1 don’t know how to address my strong emotions. Can you suggest something that will give me courage? —Chicken D ear C hicken : You’re right; the only thing that will give you the courage to come out in all aspects of your life (other than? say, a shamanic ritual or a lock of Ms. Behavior’s hair) is trying it in a safe place—e.g., your college reunion—and having a positive experience. Once you “test the waters” at your Seven Sisters gathering (perhaps by slipping your college roommate ’ the tongue during high tea) you’ll find it easier to come out in other contexts, too. And let’s face it: You’re way tcxi old to be languishing in mothballs. Besides, your partner is fed up. If your relationship is being ruined by your inability to be honest, it’s time to tell the truth. You’ve said that you’re afraid of being rejected and that your business will be ruined. Your industry might be far more open than you think. And because you're your own hoss, the only homophobia you really need to worry about is your own. In fact, many people who struggle with coming out eventually learn that their colleagues or clients either already knew that they were queer or don’t actually care and that the negative feelings ' they anticipated were actually inside them. Plus, telling the truth has powerful positive consequences. Ms. Behavior predicts that once you truly feel like yourself, unburdened by apprehension, you’ll be safer and stronger. You’ll be connected to more of your own power, so you’ll be way better at whatever it is you do for a living. You’ll make queer connections and gain more business. You’ll be more attractive, since your face will no longer be scninched up in fear. Your partner will respect you. Perhaps she’ll appreciate your courage so much that she’ll go down on you every day, for as long as you both shall live. D ear M s . B ehavior : I have an acquaintance I’ll call Steve. Steve and I share an ex, Arthur, who recently died. There have been many events surrounding Arthur’s death—including a funeral, memorial service and dinners—so I have seen a lot of Steve. At each of these events, Steve wears Arthur’s watch, which he claims Arthur gave him, but I know for a fact that Steve just helped himself to it. Steve is a liar and sometimes a thief, which is actually the reason he and Arthur weren’t speaking when Arthur died. This has little to do with me, but it is difficult to sit around at these get-togethers and hear Steve go on with stories about Arthur as if they were best friends. 1 am also pissed that he is wearing Arthur’s (very expensive) watch. I’m not saying the watch should be mine, but I think it should go to someone other than Steve. I have held my tongue, but I am getting ready to take Steve aside and tell him that I’m on to his charade. I also want to tell Arthur’s other friends who Steve really is. My partner says I should keep my mouth shut. What do you think? —About to Burst D ear A bout to B urst : and questioning youth to plan and attend monthly social events Also information, referral and advocacy servic es in Washington County (Austin 503 260-5792 Funny Ladies, a social group for nice lesbians 35 and The Old College Try Join the Rose City Softball Association, Oregon's Portland Leather Men meet every second Saturday dues, no formal organization, no officers or board, just JUStOUt 33 tion To ensure uninterrupted listing, please submit updated information at least a month prior to the expiration date Complete listings are available online at wwwjustout.com Send listings to Just Out lattn Calendar). P0 Box 14400. Portland, OR 97293 0400; Fax submissions to 503 236 1257 or email justoiitui justout com Submissions cannot be accepted over the phone Please type your announcements and include full contact information Insincere people invariably reveal themselves to be just that, as do no-good fucking liars. Anyone who matters to Arthur will soon understand who Steve is and who he isn’t, without your explaining it to them. Stxin the postmortem events will be over, life will return to normal, and you won’t have to deal with Steve anymore. Meanwhile, although Steve sounds annoying and his flaunting of the stolen watch is upsetting, there’s nothing you can do about it, unless there’s a will that contradicts Steve’s claim of ownership. Confronting Steve won’t help; he sounds like the kind of person who believes his own ridiculous stories. As for what other people think, you’re better off stepping back anti letting Steve’s lies speak for themselves. o M f .RYL C ohn is the author of Do What I Say: Ms. Behavior’s Guide to Gay and Lesbian Etiquette. Signed copies are available directly from the author. Send questions or correspondence to msbehavior@aol.coTn. •
