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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (May 6, 2005)
ADVICE ▼ opportunities (9 and 11 am Sunday 22785 NW Birch St. Htlsboro 503648 1720 www uuccwc org) SPIRI T L A L 1 T Y Metro: Spirituality University Park United Methodist Church is a Anawim Community of gay men meets weekly for Chnstian meditation and prayer. (730 pm Thursday 5032810722.) smal. Averse. open and progressive community of faith that extends a warm welcome to all people (10 am Sunday 4775 N Lombard St 503289 7843 www upumc.net) Atkinson Memorial Church a Unitarian Congregation P'nai Or (Faces of Light) is a vibrant, egalitarian. Jewish Renewal congregation in Portland Meets several times a month at Portland State University Campus Ministries (PO Box 42187. Portland. OR 97242 0187 503248 4500 www pnaiorpdx org.) Eastrose Fellowship Unitarian Universalist a welcoming congregation, offers Sunday service and children's religious education. (1030 am 1133 NE 181st Ave. Gresham 503 665 2628 office@eastroseorg www eastrose org ) Eckankar—Religion of the Light and Sound of God holds worship services and maintains a library of matenals Leam how the Divine Spirit works throughout your own life in today s world (10 am Sunday 7904 SE Milwaukie Ave 503-233-1595 www eckankar org) Enneagram Community of Portland offers mentoring, therapy, spiritual direction, classes, workshops and retreats (enneagrampdx&aol.com www enneagramportland com.) Faith United Methodist Church is a welcoming congregation that values and affirms the sacredness of all people. We invite and encourage everyone to find a place in the family of God. (10:15am Sunday 27400 SE Stark St. Troutdale 503-6614520.) First Congregational United Church of Christ is an open and affirming congregation in the liberal Chnstian tradition Church school and nursery care. (10:25 am Sunday 1126SW Park Ave 503228 7219 ) First Congregational United Church of Christ of Hillsboro is an open and affirming congregation explicitly welcoming everyone into its Chnstian community, fellowship and worship. Bible and book study groups. Sunday school and nursery care. (10 30 am Sunday 494 E Mam St 5036484341 www hillsboro-ucc org) First Unitarian Church of Portland is an open and affirming liberal religious community offering a wide range of programs to nurture spintual growth, community and social justice. Sunday service 9 and 11 am. (1011 SW 12th Ave 503 2286389 www firstumtananportland org.) Gay and Lesbian Outreach (GALO) of St Philip Nen Catholic Church celebrates an affirming Mass followed by a social (7 30 pm Friday Pauhst Center. 2408 SE 16th Ave. 503 2314955 ) Integrity is a group of sexual mmonty Episcopalians and fnends. Various locations throughout Oregon (Steven Norcross or Bruce 503 2869111 brucepdxorQcomcast net www mtegrityusa org) Interfaith Spiritual Center houses spintual directors from various world religious traditions, who are available for guidance, classes and retreats (Second Floor. 3910 SE 11th Ave 5032332026. ext 3. www mterfarthspintualcenter com ) Koinonia Catholic Community is a progressive, small faith community that gathers weekly to celebrate Euchanst at Bndgeport United Church of Christ A welcoming congregation. Cathobc in tradition and Ecumenical in membership (6 pm Sunday 621 NE 76th Ave 503699-0473 www komonacommunity org ) open and affirming with worship, children s school and child care. (10 am summer. 11 am school year 3300 SE Woodward St 503238 1337 pastor&waverlyucc org www waverlyucc org ) Wy'east Unitarian Universalist Congregation is Gay singer/songwriter/multi- instrumentalist Maia Sharp performs May 19 at Aladdin Theater. Nichiren Buddhist Temple of Portland offers several weekly gathenngs. Everyone welcome1 (10 am Sunday. 7 30 am Tuesday and Thursday 7 30 pm Wednesday meditation 2025 SE Yamhill St 503 232-8064 www nichiren shu org/portland ) Peace Church of the Brethren s a welcoming congregation. (11 am Sunday 12727 SE Market St 503 254-6380 ) Portland Center for Spiritual Growth is a center for worship, growth and leadership that adheres to an all-inclusive spiritual philosophy similar to 12-step. Unity and Religious Science Impromptu wedding ceremonies available. (503 777 0727 www portlandcenter org) an open and liberal religious community offering intergenerational services and religious education for youth and adults. We welcome gay. lesbian, tn and trans members and nurture spiritual growth living by Unitarian Universalist principles. (5 pm Sunday 3300 SE Woodward St. 503 777 3704 www wyeast pnwd uua org.) Zion United Church of Christ in open and affirming congregation, is open to gay. lesbian, bi. trans and heterosexual people who wish to worship in a Christ-centered, warm, caring, multiage/race/cultural faith community. (11 am Sunday (1030 am summed 2025 NE 23rd Ave. Gresham 5036658741.) Central Oregon: Spirituality United Church of Christ Congregational s an open and affirming congregation in The Dalles (920 am adult Sunday school. 1030 am worship (9 30 am summed 111 E Fifth St 541 296 2909 ucccongl@netcnct net www formmistry com/usorucofcucocc.) Portland Radical Faeries meet twice a month with potlucks and circles at the full moon and the new moon. Open to all men seeking alternative spintual growth and community. Coffee hours start 9:30 am Saturdays at 3 Friends Coffeehouse. 201 SE 12th Ave (503-235-0826 otter@pcez.com ) Seventh-Day Adventist Kinship is a support organization for former and current Adventists who are queer as well as their family and fnends (PO Box 49375, Sarasota. FL 342306375 866 7325677 office@sdakmship org www sdakinship org) Southminster Presbyterian Church is an active member of the Community of Welcoming Congregations Sunday school, nursery care, classes, community service activities and events for all ages and interests. (9 am Sunday chapel service. 10 am Sunday mam worship service 12250 SW Denney Road. Beaverton 503-644 2073 staff@southmm com www.southmin.com.) St. Andrew Catholic Church invites all to join a diverse faith community for prayer and fellowship (9 30 am Sunday. Noon Spanish language service 806 NE Alberta St 503281 4429) St. James Lutheran Church a Reconciled in Christ congregation, welcomes all people for traditional, liturgical worship where we experience God's reconciling love that sets all people free. (9 and 11 am Sunday 1315 SW Park Ave 503 2272439 www st/ameslutheranportland org ) St. Stephen's Episcopal Church has been welcoming all people since 1863 (12:10 pm Wednesday and 7 45 and 10 am Sunday Sunday school and child care at 10 am 1432 SW 13th Ave 503 2236424) SisterSpirit offers women’s spirituality celebrations, discussion groups, a drumming circle, workshops and classes Schedule of events available. AH women are welcome (Suite 102. 3430 SE Belmont St Mailing address PO Box 9246. Portland. OR 97207 503 736-3297 srstersp@teleport com ) »------------ -- ---- aa-r - -1-eSftl - ------ — *- Mnirarvan unrversaiisi vornniunvty wiurcn ot Washington County is an open and affirming liberal rekgnus community offering a variety of enrichment programs n addrtion to community and social action Washington: Spirituality Abundant Life Center assists the community in spintual growth (10am Sunday 111 W39th St. Vancouver The Rev Kathleen Vengin 360-573-2626 www abundant life-center org.) First Congregational United Church of Christ has been an open and affirming congregation since 1992. extending God's extravagant welcome to all people, no matter who they are or where they are on life's journey (1220 NE 68th St.. Vancouver 360-6931476 www vancouverucc org) Longview United Methodist Church is welcoming and reconciling. (10 am Sunday 2851 30th Ave. Longview 360-425 4927 ) Metropolitan Church of the Gentle Shepherd welcomes you Bible study follows morning worship. (10 30 am and 6 30 pm Sunday 2200 Broadway St. Vancouver The Rev Harriet Barshofsky 360-695 1480) Michael Servitus Unitarian Universalist Fellowship, a Welcoming Congregation, provides a home for the liberal religious spirit (9 30 and 11:15 am Sunday 4505 E 18th St . Vancouver 360-695 1891.) St. Luke's Episcopal Church has welcomed all people since 1853 Traditional but never stuffy (English 8 and 10 30 am Sunday Spanish 1 pm Sunday Child care at 1030 am 426 E Fourth Plain Blvd. Vancouver The Rev John Allen 3606960181 www stlukeschurch .info.) Willamette Valley: Spirituality First Congregational Church United Church of Christ is an open and affirming congregation offering worship and church school. Child care provided and wheelchair accessible (930 am Sunday learning hour. 10 30 am worship 700 Manon St NE. Salem 503-363 3660) I ***-----»---- I Metropolitan vomniunity vnurcn iwo nnrer» is a Christian church with pnmary outreach in the sexual minorities community (630pm Sunday 1166 Oak St.. Eugene) Fnday. 2TOO SE Belmont St 5038729664 --« p —umaanifu I - -»*1 irOI<8 Pe rCdCt vOmiTiUDIiy UnUfrCI M WlfrinOCJiSl Church is a ‘house church' that brings gay and wnn1r.intyK.cs9J straight together Darty morning prayer and Sunday evening worship (503 281 3697 www tearsoup com/metancxa) Eastern Oregon: Youth w/' > Living aferWppM and «Noc^toga^iXan. bl. Metropolitan Community Church of Portland holds ecumenical Sunday morning worship services at 9 and 11 am Sunday school for children is held during the 11 am service (2400 NE Broadway 503-281 8868 infoGmccportland com www mccportlandcom) tons and questioning youth M Eastern Oregon (1021 SW Fifth Awe„ Ontario. 5418893119 or 8662488369. oocfOeoaiorg wwweoci.org > Washington: Youth THpl» PieiM offers education. support and adrocacy to oav {nation, bt. trana and westkxwiQ youth in Vancouver. Meets every Tuesday in th» basement, of Youth House. 4M pm tltiCdurritySl John 3604991325J Gay comedian James Williamson performs May 7 at Windows. Partner envies Mr. Right’s sown oats Waverly Heights United Church of Christ is Universalist church, provides a spintual home for those looking for a liberal-minded, supportive and caring congregation in Oregon City (1030 am Sunday 710 Sixth St 5036507296) Bridgeport United Church of Christ is a community of progressive, political people exploring and celebrating the Christian faith We are sexual mmonty and straight, multicultural and multiracial, and our children are valued members (10:30 am Sunday 621 NE 76th Ave 503 2580992 www bndgeportucc org) Measure of a man trans, M Í I^EAR MS. B ehavior : I’m 34 and in an eight-year monog amous relationship with a 38-year-olJ man, the only person I’ve ever kissed or been intimate with. I was so paranoid about diseases that I’d go on dates with other guys but send them on their way when 1 realized our personalities did not click. I waited for Mr. Right and do think 1 found him. My partner is great. I le is loving, extremely devoted and good-looking. It was important to me to know my partner’s past; when we first met we discussed it extensively. However, I recently learned that one of our closest friends was a former fling of my partner’s. I called my partner on this, and he confessed that it was tme. Soon I learned that his past was more extensive than he’d acknowledged. I felt deceived and hurt that I wasn’t given full disclosure. I’m having a hard rime talking to my friends now as well as my partner. I’m questioning the relationship, and I feel as if I’m competing with his past. I feel like less of a man for not having chosen the same path; if I had “sown my oats” it would not be a big deal. 1 do realize my lack of an intimate past Ls playing a big role in my feelings. I feel tom between the best thing that ever happened to me and my need to feel like more of a man. I hope you have gtxxl advice. Thanks. D ear G.: Come on. Do you really think you’re questioning your relationship because your partner didn’t fully disclose his sexual history? It sounds like you just want to parlay your feelings of betrayal into a few dozen acts of fucking and sucking so you’ll feel like “more of a man.” Maybe that’s ultimately what you’ll need to do, but you’ll be happier if you do it from a conscious place, rather than deluding yourself about why you want to be with other men. When your partner misled you about his sexual experience from the beginning, maybe he sensed that revealing his whole slutty history would scare you or make you feel inadequate. Now, after eight years of monogamy, why does his past matter? Why does your lack of experience suddenly loom so large? Would getting a few extra blow jobs really make you feel like a man? If 90, is your partner willing to allow you to experiment? And even if “Mr. Right" says it’s OK to go fuck your brains out for a while, are you willing to risk whatever may happen to your relationship? You’d be wise to wait and do nothing for a while and see if your feelings pass or change into something else. Meanwhile, keep an open dialogue with your partner. Perhaps he can help you think of something else that will make you feel more manly: A new hat? A big truck? A new attitude? D ear M s . B ehavior : Recently my partner and 1 attended a (straight) baby shower for her cousin’s wife. Her cousin didn’t attend. While driving home I asked my partner, who will have a baby before I do, if 1 can come to her baby shower. She replied that since 1 would serve as the “husband,” I would not be invited. 1 asked if I would have a baby shower when I was pregnant with our second child, which would be my first. She said she thought I should have one. I don’t think it’s fair to ask our families and friends to throw two showers in light of the expense and the fact that we’ll have stuff from the first baby. 1 also want to go to her baby shower because it will be our first baby. What should I do? —Baby Shower Blues IT ear B aby S hlwer B lues : Ms. Behavior has a news flash for your partner: When lesbians create their own celebrations, they don’t need to follow heterosexual traditions. Lesbians can do whatever they want. We don’t have to makes silly hats from wrapping paper at baby showers. We don’t have to exclude men. And even if some lesbians do exclude men or husbands from their baby showers, you’re not a man or a husband! If you want to attend your Raby’s shower, you should be able to do so. If somehow you end up submitting to your partner’s ridiculous mle that you can’t attend her baby shower, then you should have your own. But Ms. Behavior senses a dangerous precedent, where one baby will be considered your partner’s and one will be yours. You’ll have a happier family experience if you can integrate both babies into both of your lives. Attending your partner’s baby shower seems like a step in that direction, jm M eryl C xthn is the author of Do What I Say: Ms. Behavior’s Guide to Gay and Lesbian Etiquette. Signed copies are available directly from the author. Send questions or correspondence to msbehavior@aol.com.
