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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (July 2, 2004)
33 ADVICE .............. ▼............... Euchanst at Bndgeport United Church of Christ. A wel SPIRITUALITY coming congregation, Catholic m tradition and Ecumenical in membership (6 pm Sunday 621 NE 76th Ave Metro: Spirituality Ainsworth United Church of Christ is a multi racial, multicultural, open and affirming church. Sunday worship is at 10 am; church school for children runs concurrently (2941 NE Ainsworth St 503 2848767. aucc@teleport com.) (7/04) Anawim Community of gay men meets weekly for Chnstian meditation and prayer. (7 30 pm Thursday Sunday 3915 SE Steele St 503-777-3901) (7/04) Longview United Methodist Church is welcom ing and reconciling (10 am Sunday. 2851 30th Ave believes in giving to the community, caring for one 360-425-4927.) (7/04) Metanoia Peace Community United Methodist Church is a "house church" that brings gay and straight together Daily morning prayer and Sunday evening worship. (503-281-3697. www.tearsoup.com/metanoia.) (7/04) Bridgeport United Church of Christ s a commu nity of progressive, political people explonng and cele Metropolitan Community Church of Portland straight, multicultural and multiracial, and our children are valued members. (1030 am Sunday 621 NE 76th Ave. 503-258-0992 www bndgeportucc org.) (7/04) City Church Portland’s "oldest gay-affirming Christian church." offers a spirit-driven church for today s diverse generations. (10 am Sunday commu nion and worship service. 630 pm Sunday worship service 3830 SE62ndAve 503-775 5024X7/04) Congregation P'nai Or (Faces of Light) is a vibrant, egalitarian. Jewish Renewal congregation in Portland. Meets several times a month at Portland State University Campus Ministries. (PO Box 42187, Portland. OP holds ecumenical Sunday morning worship services at 503-232-8064 www nichiren-shu org/portland) (7/04) Peace Church of the Brethren is a welcoming congregation. (11 am Sunday 12727 SE Market St 503 254-6380) (7/04) Portland Center for Spiritual Growth is a center Eastrose Fellowship Unitarian Universalist a inclusive spiritual philosophy similar to 12-step, Unity and Religious Science. Impromptu wedding ceremonies avail eastrose@teleport.com. wwweastrose.org.) (7/04) Eckankar—Religion of the Light and Sound of God holds worship services and maintains a library of materials to help you leam about the Divine Spirit in today s world. (10 am Sunday 7904 SE Milwaukie Ave. 503-233-1595. www.eckankar org.) (7 /04) able (503-777-0727. wwwportlandcenterorg.)(7 /04) Portland Radical Faeries meet twice a month with potlucks and circles at the full moon and the new encourages all people in finding a place of belonging in the family of God Sunday worship at 10:15 am; Adult Waverly Heights United Church of Christ is open and affirming with worship, children's school and child care. (10 am Sunday 3300 SE Woodward St 503-238-1337. www.waverlyucc org.)(7/04) is an open and liberal religious community offenng inter- and adults We welcome gay, lesbian, bi and trans members and nurture spintual growth living by Umtanan Universalist pnnciples (4 pm Sunday 3915 SE Steele St. 503-777-3704 www wyeastpnwduua.org) (7/04) Zion United Church of Christ an open and affirming congregation, is open to gay. lesbian, bi. trans and heterosexual people who wish to worship in a Christ-centered, warm, canng. multiage/race/cultural faith community. (11 am Sunday. 2025 NE 23rd Ave, Gresham 503-665-8741) (7/04) Central Oregon: Spirituality United Church of Christ Congregational s an moon Open to all men seeking alternative spintual open and affirming congregation in The Dalles. (920 am adult Sunday school, 10:30 am Sunday worship growth and community Coffee hours start 9:30 am Saturdays at 3 Friends Coffeehouse, 201 SE 12th Ave www. formmistry. com/usorucofcucocc.) (7/04) lit EFifth St 541 296-2909 ucccongl@netcnctnet. (503-235-0826 otter@pcez.com) (7/04) Seventh-Day Adventist Kinship is a support organi Faith United Methodist Church is a welcoming community of Christians in Troutdale that values and Knepper 503-289 7843) (7/04) generational services and religious education for youth Wednesday meditation 2025 SE Yamhill St zation for queer people, their families and friends (PO Box 7320. Laguna Niguel. CA 92607-7320 866-732-5677. office@sdakmship.org. www.sdakmship.org.) (7/04) Washington: Spirituality Abundant Life Center is A New Thought Community for spiritual awakening and transforming SisterSpirit offers women's spirituality celebrations, lives through love. A safe place where children learn to embody spiritual principles. (10 am Sunday 10006 NE Wednesday Prayers 6-6 30 pm (27400 SE Stark St. discussion groups, a drumming circle, workshops and classes. Schedule of events available All women are 503-661 -4520.) (7/04) welcome. (Suite 102, 3430 SE Belmont St Mailing 360-573-2626X7104) Education at 9 am; children and youth at 10 30 am address: PO Box 9246. Portland. OR 97207. First Unitarian Church of Portland is an open and affirming liberal religious community offering a wide range of 503-736-3297. sistersp@teleport.cogi ) (7104) programs to nurture spintual growth, community and social justice. Sunday service 9 and 11 am (1011 SW 12th Ave. Southminster Presbyterian Church is an active 503228-6389 wwwfirstunitananportlandorg.) (7/04) Congregations. Sunday school and nursery care Gay and Lesbian Outreach (GALO) of St Philip Neri Ca‘holic Church celebrates an affirming Mass fol lowed by a social. (730 pm Fnday Paulist Center. Classes, community service activities and events for all ages and interests. (9-9 30 am Sunday chapel service. 10 am Sunday community worship service 12250 SW Denney Road. Beaverton. 503-644-2073. 2408 SE 16th Ave 503-2314955X7/04) staff@southmm com www southmm com.) (7/04) Gay Men's Labyrinth Project meets quarterly for a walking meditation and wisdom circle on the labyrinth (www gaylabyhnth.com.) (7/04) St. Andrew Catholic Church invites all to join a diverse faith community for prayer and fellowship (9.30 am Sunday 806 NE Alberta St 503281-4429.) (7/04) Integrity is a group of sexual minonty Episcopalians and friends. Various locations throughout Oregon. St. James Lutheran Church a Reconciled in Christ congregation, welcomes all people for traditional, (Bruce 503-286-9111. brucepdxor@attbi com liturgical worship where we experience God's reconcil www.integntyusa.org.) (7/04) Interfaith Spiritual Center houses spintual direc tors from vanous world religious traditions, who are available for guidance, classes and retreats. (Second Floor. 3910 SE 11th Ave. 503233-2026. ext. 3. www interfaithspiritualcenter com.) (7/04) member of the Community of Welcoming • Keshet Portland is a potluck group for Jewish mem bers of the sexual minorities community and their part ners. spouses and supporters Its purpose is to help build bridges with the larger Jewish community Monthly social, religious and cultural events. (David or ing love that sets all people free (9 and 11 am Sunday 1315 SW Park Ave 503-227-2439 Ninth Ave., Vancouver The Rev Kathleen Vengin East Vancouver United Methodist Church is reconciling and welcoming (10 am Sunday 5701 MacArthur Blvd 360-693-4761.) (7/04) First Congregational Church United Church of Christ, holds services in an open and affirming congre gation. (10 am Sunday worship. 11:15 am adult educa tion 1220 NE 68th St.. Vancouver 360-693-1476 vanucc@aol com.) (7/04) Metropolitan Community Church of the Gentle Shepherd in Vancouver welcomes you. (10:30 am and 630 pm Sunday worship. 9 am Sunday Bible study. 2200 Broadway The Rev. Harriet Barshofsky 360-695-1480) (7/04) Michael Servetus Unitarian Universalist Fellowship a Welcoming Congregation, provides a home for the liberal religious spint (9:30 and 1115 am Sunday 4505 E 18th St . Vancouver 360695-1891X7/04) www stiameslutheranportland.org.) (7/04) St. Stephen's Episcopal Church has been welcom Willamette Valley: Spirituality First Congregational Church United Church of 10 am 1432 SW 13th Ave. 503223-6424X7/04) Chnst is an open and affirming congregation offenng wor affirming congregation, invites all to worship services and ongoing programs in spiritual development, com ship and church school. Child care provided and wheelchair accessible. (9:30 am Sunday learning hour, 10:30 am wor ship. 700 Manon St NE. Salem 503-363-3660X7/04) Metropolitan Community Church Two Rivers Laney 503-226-7079. ext 143(7/04) munity outreach, music and arts education. (8 am Sunday Rite I chapel service 10 am Sunday Rite II is a Chnstian church with pnmary outreach in the sexual Koinonia Catholic Community is a progressive, cathedral service. 147 NW 19th Ave 503-222-9811 minorities community (6:30pm Sunday 1166 Oak St.. small faith community that gathers weekly to celebrate www tnnity-episcopal.org.) (7/04) Eugene) (7/04) Sexual Minority Youth Resource Center (SMYRC) a program of Cascadia Behavioral Washington: Youth YOUTH Metro: Youth Flavors a social support group for sexual minonty youth of color 21 and younger, meets on weekends for food and socializing Regular events and activities Flavors is a project of Love Makes a Family 's MultiQueer program and is supported by Brother to Brother. (Kristy 503-228-3892 muttiqueer@imfgmify orgXI 104) HealthCam. offers support and recreation to gay. lesbian, Triple Point offers education, support and advocacy bi and trans youth 23 and younger Offers drop-in comput er access, pool tables and an informal place to hang out to gay, lesbian, bi, trans and questioning youth in Vancouver. Wash Meets 6-8 pm Tuesdays in the base Weekly support meetings includes Trans Youth Group and ment of Youth House. 1112 Columbia St. in Vancouver. the creative group Personal Deity Proxy. (48 pm Monday and Wednesday. 4 pm-midnght Friday and Saturday (John 360-695-1325.) (7/04) 2100 SE Belmont St. 503872-9664 TTY 503-231-9286 www.smyrc.org.) Other programs include: Clackamas County Sexual Minority Youth Connection The Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education (COSMYC) provides opportunities for queer and ques Network (GLSEN) fights to end anti-gay bias in K-12 schools (Suite 180. 12700 SW North Dakota St. tioning youth ages 23 and younger to get together for »129. Tigard OR 97223 503-525-1177. one support, referrals and information on HIV and STD free, fun and supportive social activities. Offers one-on- glsen@glsenoregon.org www gisenoregon.org.) (7/04) prevention and resources for adults who work with queer MultiQueer a program of Love Makes a Family, provides and questioning youth. (5039690060. cosmycyouth@yehoo.com 1 Pride Project bnngs togeth advocacy to sexual minonty youth. Offers resources and support in the community and the school systems, with a focus on support for queer and questioning youth of color (Kristy 503-228 3892 nAique&@Mamily org.) (7/04) Center. 2700 HUyard St 541-684-3466X7/04) Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender Youth 541-346-1134 3(7/04) in Eugene. (5 pm Koinonia Center. 1414 Kincaid St. (Molly 503-260-5792 moty@pndeprofect.org) (7/04) Out *n' About Youth meet every Thursday m Corvafts (7 pm 1165 Monroe Ave. 541-754-3906 > (7/04) Eastern Oregon: Youth and younger as well as for those HIV+ and younger than 23 Needs volunteers of all ages (10am-6pm Eastern Oregon Center for Independent Living offers sipport and advocacy to gay. lesbian, bi, trans and questioning youth to Eastern Oregon. (5418893119 or 866248-8369 eoal0eocii.org www eoctlorg.) (7/04) Send your ram facilitated (Drop in 46 pm Fnday Amazon Community referral and advocacy services ¡n Washington County. exchange services that include those who inject hor mones Can provide transitional housing for youth 20 www outstderi.org.) (7704) Youth Group for ages 13 to 18 offers support, inform ation and fun m Eugene Free, confidential, adult- Group for ages 25 and younger meets every Monday qualify for the Oregon Health Plan as wei as needle Monday-Friday 1132 SW 13th Ave 503535-3800 Willamette Valley: Youth Gay, Lesbian, Bi. Transgender and Questioning er Washington County queer and questioning youth to plan and attend monthly social events. Also information, Outside In operates a clinic for anyone who can t Googling may at first seem somewhat rude, like I recently returned to looking in a neighbor’s the dating scene after window while he undress ending a 10-year monog amous relationship. I am es, but really it’s not. Practically speaking, it’s meeting most guys over the Internet because more like choosing not to cover your eyes while your I don’t go to bars. I had a date recently neighbor walks naked through your front yard. that reminded me how As for whether you things have changed since should Gcxigle prospective the last time 1 was single. by Meryl Cohn He mentioned that he dates before meeting them, of course you should! But had looked me up on the be forewarned that it’s as addictive as Internet and found an editorial I had broadcast over a local radio station. At snack food and masturbation. first I was glad he mentioned it, because D ear M s . B ehavior : the material would make for good din ner conversation. As it turned out, he I’m dating a nice man whose com wasn’t interested in discussing this at all. pany I enjoy. I’m not in love with Then I got to thinking, why the Charlie, which he says is OK with heck would he Gcxigle me? I can him, but 1 worry that his feelings understand the need to screen dates might be stronger than mine. through the kxral “most wanted” list, We see each other two or three but more than that seems a little tacky. times a week. We go to the movies or What else do you need to know the opera, have dinner, have sex and about a guy before meeting him? His spend the night together. Anytime credit rating? His employment history? things seem too heavy or romantic, His most recent address? You’re cer 1 remind him that I’m not in love and tainly not going to use the Internet to not ready for anything serious. I’m see if I like long walks in the moon still open to dating other people. light and cuddling during rainstorms. My friends tell me that no matter What do you think about this? what 1 say, my actions are misleading Should I be running these guys through and are likely to hurt Charlie. 1 don’t a Google search before 1 think it’s my job to pro meet them? tect him from hurt as —Unhappily long as I tell the truth Googled about my feelings. What do you think? D ear U nhappily —V. D ear M s . B ehavior : People other than potential dates may also G : Google you Ms. Behavior doesn’t and, in fact, mean to frighten you, but people other than are probably potential dates may also Google you and, in fact, Googling the are probably Googling hell out of you the hell out of you right now. right now Who else might do oogled ing all people since 1863 (12:10pm Wednesday and 7:45 and 10 am Sunday. Sunday school and child care at Trinity Episcopal Cathedral a welcoming and How much do you want to know? Sunday 4775 N Lombard St The Rev. Jeannie the 11 am service. (2400 NE Broadway 503-281 8868 mfo@mccportland com. www. mccportland com.) (7/04) for worship, growth and leadership that adheres to an all children's religious education (10:30 am Sunday 1133 NE 181st Ave.. Gresham 503-665-2628 another and making a difference one person at a time. Come celebrate God's diversity with us1 (10 am Wy'east Unitarian Universalist Congregation Nichiren Buddhist Temple of Portland offers several weekly gathenngs Everyone welcome1 (10 am Sunday. 7 30 am Tuesday and Thursday 7 30 pm Getting Googled University Park United Methodist Church 9 and 11 am Sunday school for children is held dunng 97242-0187 503-248-4500 wwwpnaiorpdx.org.) (7/04) welcoming congregation, offers Sunday service and who seek the grace of God and desire to work for .peace and justice Child care available (10 30 am 503-699-0473 www komoniacommunity org >17/04) 503-281 -0722.) (7/04) brating the Christian faith. We are sexual minonty and Trinity United Methodist Church is for all people Rainbow Youth is a safe, confidential support group for young gay men. lesbians, bisexuals, trans gender, questioning and friends (6-8 pm Wednesday Mrcha Building. 690 State St.. Salem www.salemratnbowyouth.org.) (1/04) outreach listings to: just out (attn: Calendar) • PO Box 14400 • Portland. OR 97293-0400 Fax submissions to 503-236-1257 or e-mail justout@justout.com t be accepted over the phone • Please type your announcements and include full contact information it? Business acquaintances, friends from schexil, anyone you happen to meet at a party and old boyfriends who need to know whether you’re as successful as they are. In fact, Ms. Behavior plans to Gixigle you as s<x>n as she finishes her column. Perhaps your 10 recent years of monogamy t<x>k you and your mate to a sweet and gentle place, far removed from wireless networks, search engines and the curious minds that want to undress you before a first date. It’s a quaint image, you and your boyfriend cuddling on the couch, ever spared from the rapid evolution of threaten ing technology, with no worries about what information might come up—or, worse, not come up—on a prospective date’s 20-inch monitor. Purists and Luddites may still want to cultivate and savor a first-date impres sion that hasn’t been created or minified by the media. But they’re roughly in the same proportion of the population as those who chixise not to know the gen der of their babies in advance, even though the technology is available. D ear V.: The “I’m not in love with you” mantra only works if you can deliver it sincerely and consis tently and if the other person is able to hear it. Only you know if you’re being emotionally hon est with your thrice-weekly date. If your friends are concerned, it may be because they hear you saying the words, “I’m not in love with you,” while your behavior spells out L-O-V-E, as clearly as if you were tapping it out on Charlie’s back in Morse cixie. Why would you (perhaps un consciously) give mixed messages like that? Maybe you’re lonely. Maybe the sex is good and readily available. And perhaps you want to have your cake and eat it, too (while keeping the option to spit it out). If you continue to date Charlie, ask yourself what you’d be doing dif ferently if you were m love with him. If you can’t think of anything, you’re probably misleading him. JH © Meryl Cohn 2004 MERYL C ohn is the author of Do What I Say: Ms. Behavior’s Guide to Gay and Lesbian Etiquette (Houghton Mifflm). Signed copies are available directly from the author. Send questions or I correspondence to msbehauor@aol.com.
