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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Dec. 19, 2003)
______________________dflcam b* 13. 2003» J— > « ^ ¡3 7 ADVICE SPIRITUALITY Metro: Spirituality Ainsworth United Church of C hrist is a multiracial, multicultural, open and affirming church Sunday worship is at 10 am. church school for children runs concurrently (2941 NE Ainsworth St 503 284 8767 auccdteleport com.) (7/04) Anawim Com m unity of gay men meets weekly for Chnstian meditation and prayer (730 pm Thursday 503 2816722) (7/04) B ridgeport U nited C hurch o f C h rist is a community of progressive, political people exploring and celebrating the Chnstian faith We are sexual mmonty and straight, m ulti cultural and multiracial, and our children are valued mem bers (10 30 am Sunday 621 NE 76th Ave 503 2580992 www bndgeportucc o rg ) (7/04) The C ity Church. Portland's 'o lde st gay affirming Keshet Portland is a potluck group for Jewish members of the sexual mmonties community and their partners, spous es and supporters Its purpose is to help build bridges with the larger Jewish community Monthly social, rekgious and cultural events (David or Laney 503-226-7079. ext 14 ) (7/04) Koinonia C atholic Com m unity >s a progressive, smal faith community that gathers weekly to celebrate Euchanst at Bridgeport United Church of Chnst A welcoming congre gation. Catholic m tradition and Ecumenical m membersNp (6pm Sunday 621 NE 76th Ave 503 699 0473 www komoniacommumty org) (7/04) Lasbian C hristian FaUoiwship meets for study and social outings Committed Chnstians and s t l unsures welcome (Barbara 503-760-5791 1(7/04) Longview United M ethodist Church is welcoming and reconciling (10 am Sunday 2851 30th Ave. 360-425-4927)( 7/04) M etanoia Peace Community United M ethodist C hurch is a 'house church* that bnngs gay and straight Chnstian church,' offers a spint driven church for today's diverse generations (W arn Sunday communion and wor ship service. 6 30 pm Sunday worship service 3830 SE 62nd Ave 503-775 5024) (7/04) together Daily morning prayer and Sunday evening worship (503-281 3697 www tearsoup com/metanoia) (7/04) C ongregation P 'nai O r (Faces of Light) is a vibrant, egalitarian. Jewish Renewal congregation in Portland Meets several times a month at Portland State University Campus M inistries (PO Box 42187. Portland. OR 97242 0187 503-248-4500 www pnaiorpdx org ) (7/04) holds ecumenical Sunday mommg worship services at 9 and 11 am Sunday school for children is held during the 11 am service (2400 NE Broadway 503-2818868 mfodmccportland com www mccportland com ) (7/04) Eastroee Fellow ship U nitarian U niversalist. a w el coming congregation, offers Sunday service and children s religious education (10 30 am Sunday 1133 NE 181st Ave. Gresham 503 6652628 east rose dteleport com. www eastrose o rg ) (7/04) Faith U nited M ethodist C hurch is a welcoming com mumty of Chnstians m Troutdale that values and encourages all people m finding a place of belonging in the family of God Sunday worship at 10:15 am; Adult Education at 9 am; children and youth at 10 30 am Wednesday Prayers 6 6 30 pm. (27400 SE Stark St 503 661-4520)( 7/04) F irst U nitarian C hurch of Portland is an open and affirming liberal religious community offenng a wide range of programs to nurture spintual growth, community and social lustice Sunday service 9 and 11 am (1011 SW 12th Ave 503-2286389 www hrstumtananporttand org ) (7/04) Gay and Lesbian Outreach (GALO) of St Philip Nen Catholic Church celebrates an affirm ing Mass followed by a social (7 30 pm Fnday Pauhst Center. 2408 SE 16th Ave 503 231 4 9 5 5 ) (7/04) Gay M editation Group is a casual, nonreligious group for gay and tx men that meets to meditate together and socialize (7 30 pm Tuesdays beginning Jan 6 Dean Sidwell 503 997-6319 )17/04) Gay Men's Labyrinth Project meets quarterly for a walking meditation and wisdom arele on the labynnth (Dale 5032332026. ext 3 www ntedathspmtualcenter com.) (7/04) M etropolitan Community C hurch of Portland The N ichiren Buddhist Temple o f Portland offers several weekly gathenngs Everyone welcome1 (10 am Sunday. 7 30 am Tuesday and Thursday 7 30 pm Wednesday meditation 2025 SE Yamhill St 503-232-8064 www mchiren-shu org/porttand) (7/04) N orthw est Tw o-Spirit Society of Portland welcomes new members from the native LGBT (Two-Spints) community to pm our counal and organize or attend monthly meetings (Amanda 503 869-0076 thesebraidsdgo com ) (7/04) Peace C hurch o f the B rethren is a welcoming congregation. ( I I am Sunday 12727 SE Market St. 503 254 6 3 8 0 )( 7/04) P ortland C enter fo r S p iritu a l G rowth is a center for w orshp. growth and leadership that adheres to an all inclusive spintual philosophy similar to 12 step, Unity and Religious Science (503-777-0727. www porttandcenter.org.) (7/04) Portland Radical Faeries meet twice a month with potkjeks and circles at the full moon and the new moon Open to al men seeking alternative spintual growth and community Coffee hours start 9 30 am Saturdays at 3 Fnends Coffeehouse. 201 SE 12th Ave (5032350826 otterdpeez com 1(7/04) Seventh-Day A dventist K inship is a support organize tion for LGBT people, their families and fnends (PO Box 7320. Laguna Niguel. CA 92607-7320 866 732-5677. ofhcedsdakmship org www sdakmship org 1(7/04) chapel service. 10 am Sunday community worship service 12250 SW Denney Road. Beaverton 503644 2073 staffdsouthmn com www southmm com. 1(7/04) Sunday 806 NE AJbeita St 503 281 4429 ) (7/04) St. Stephen's Episcopal Church has been welcoming all people since 1863 (12 10 pm Wednesday and 7 45 and 10 am Sunday Sunday school and child care at 10 am 1432 SW 13th Ave 503 223 6424 ) (7/04) W averiy Heights UCC is open and affirming with wor ship, children s school and chid care (10 am Sunday 3300 SE Woodward St 503 238 1337 www wavedyucc org. 1(7 /04) W y'east U nitarian U niversalist Congregation is an open and liberal rekgwus community offenng mtergenera tional services and religious education for children, youth and adults It welcomes gay. lesbian, bi and trans members It nurtures spintual growth and promotes living by Unitarian Universalist principles (4 pm Sunday. 5 pm m summer 3915 SE Steele St 503 777-3704 www wyeastpnwd uua o rg ) (7/04) Zion U nited C hurch o f C h rist an open and affirm ing congregation, is open to gay. lesbian, b . trans and hetero sexual people who wish to worship m a Chnst-centered, warm, canng. m ultiage/race/cultural faith community ( I t am Sunday 2025 N E 23rdA ve , Gresham 503665 8741 1(7/04) Central Oregon: Spirituality United C hurch o f C hrist C ongregational is an open and affirming congregation m The Dalles (920 am adult Sunday school. 1030 am Sunday worshp 111 E Fifth St- 541 2962909 ucccongKfoetcnct net www formmstry com/usorucofcucocc 1(7/04) Washington: Spirituality Abundant Life C enter is A New Thought Community for spintual awakening and transforming lives through love A safe place where children learn to embody spintual pnnci pies (W arn Sunday 10006 NE Ninth A v e . Vancouver Rev Kathleen Vengm. 360573 2 6 2 6 )0 /0 4 ) East Vancouver U nited M ethodist C hurch is recon cihng and welcoming (10 am Sunday 5701 MacArthur Btvd 360693 4761)(7104) First C ongregational Church United Church of Chnst. In te g rity is a group of sexual mmonty Episcopalians and friends Various locations throughout Oregon. (Bruce groups, a drumming aide, workshops and classes Schedule of events available A l women are welcome (Suite 102. 3430 SE holds services m an open and affirming congregation (10 am 503 286 91 11 brucepdxorúattbi com www mtegntyusa org.) (7/04) Belmont St Mailing address PO Box 9246. Portland. OB 97207 5037363297 sisterspdtelepor1com)(7/04) Interfaith Spiritual Center houses spintual directors from various world religious tradrtions. who are available for guidance, classes and retreats (Second Floor. 3910 SE 11th Ave South m inster P resbyterian Church is an active mem ber of the Community of Welcoming Congregations Sunday school and nursery care Classes, community service actrvi ties and events for all ages and interests (9 9 3 0 am Sunday Sunday worship. 11 15 am adult education 1220 NE 68th St . Vancouver 360693 1476 vanuccdacd com 1(7/04) M etropolitan C om m unity C hurch o f the Gentle Shepherd m Vancouver welcomes you. (1030 am and 6 30 pm Sunday worship. 9 am Sunday Bible study 2200 Broadway The Rev Harriet Barshofsky 360-695-1480) (7/04) M ichael Servetus U nitarian U niversalist Fellowship, a Welcoming Congregation, provides a home for the liberal religious spint (930 and 11:15 am Sunday 4505 E 18th St.. Vancouver 360695 1891) (7/04) Willamette Valley: Spirituality First Congregational Church United Church of Chnst is an open and affirming con gregation offenng worship and church school Chid care provided and wheefeha* accessible Haie Gallery continues its novel Battle of the Artist Curators through Dec. 31 YOUTH Metro: Youth Flavors, a social support group fo r sexual m inority youth o f color 21 and younger m eets on weekends fo r food and socializing Regular events and a ctivitie s Flavors is a project o f Love M akes a Fam ily's M ultiQ ueer program and is supported by B rother to B rother (Jaye 503-2263892 ¡ayeQimfamtly org 1 (7 /0 4 ) The Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network (G LSEN ) fights to end antt-gey bias in K-12 schools (12700 SW North DakotB St . Suite 180. »129. Tigard. OR 97223 503-5251177 glsendglsenoregon org www glsenoregon.org) (7/04) MultiQueer. a program o f Love Makes a Family, provides advocacy to sexual mmonty youth. O ffers resource« and support in the community and the school systems, with a focus on support fo r LGBTQ youth of color (Jaye 503-2263892 ¡ayedtmfamdy org 1(7/04) O utside In operates a c*m c fo r anyone w ho can t qual ify fo r the O regon Health Plan as w e* as needle exchange services that Include those who inject hor m ones. Can provide tran#itionel housing fo r youth 20 (9 30 am Sunday learning hour. 1030 amworshp 700ManonSt NE. Salem 503 363 3660) (7/04) and younger as w ell as fo r those HIV+ and younger than 23 Needs volunteers o f all ages (10 am 6 pm Monday Eastern Oregon: Youth Friday 1132 SW 13th Ave. 503-535 3800 www outsidein.org) (7/04) Eastern Oregon Canter for Independent Living Sexual M inority Youth Reaource Center a pro gram o f Cascadia Behavioral HealthCare. o ffe rs support and recreation to gay. lesbian, b and trans youth 23 and younger. O ffe rs drop-in com puter access, pool tables and an Inform al place to hang out W eekly support meet ings includes Trans Youth G roup and the creative group Personal D eity Proxy (4 8 pm Monday and Wednesday. 4 pm rmdnight Friday and Saturday. 2100 SE Belmont St 503-872 9664 TTY 503-231-9286 www smyre o rg ) O ther program s include C lackam as County Sexual M inority Youth Connection (C O S M Y C ) provides opportunities fo r queer and questioning youth ages 23 and younger to get together fo r free, fun and supportive social a ctivitie s O ffers one-on-one support, referral« and Inform ation on HIV and STD prevention and resources fo r adults who w ork w ith LGBTQ youth. (503-9690060 cosnrycyouthOye/hoo com ) P ride Project bnngs together W ashington C ounty queer and questioning youth to plan and attend m onthly sooal events A lso inform ation, referral and advocacy services m W ashington C ounty (M ofy 503 260-5792 m otydpndsprgpctorgJ (7/04) Your boots were made for walkin’— away from selfish lovers St. Janies Lutheran Church a Reconciled m Chnst con gregation. welcomes a l people for tracktional. kturgcal wor stop vrfiere we experience God s reconcfng love that sets al people free (9 and 11 am Sunday 1315 SW Park Ave 5032272439 www st/amestutheranportland org.) (7/04) S isterS pirit offers women s spmtuakty celebrations discussxxi 5032332026. ext 3 www ntedaithspmtuatenter com.) (7/04) Bad love St. Andrew C atholic Church invites all to pm a diverse faith community for prayer and fellowship (930 am offers support and advocacy to gey. lesbian, b . trans and questioning youth xi Eastern Oregon (541-8893119 or 8662468369 eocfdeocd.org w w w eocdorg) (7/04) Washington: Youth Triple Point offers education, support and advocacy to gay. lesbian, b . trans and questtonog youth xi Vancouver. Waah Meets 6-8 pm Tuesdays xi the basement of Youth House. 1112Colum baSt xiVm couver (John3606951325.)(7104) D ear B e M s h a v io r . : I have a ques tion I’ve been dying to ask some one, but it’s kind of embarrassing. Is it rude for someone to just turn over and go to sleep after they have been sexually pleased, without returning the favor? I don’t mean to sound naive, but l have only been with three women, and all of them have done that to me at least half of the times I have slept with them. None of them were long-term relationships, hut they were all women who I dated for at least a couple of months. In each of these cases, I have found myself lying in bed, frus trated and staring at the ceiling, while the woman snores peace fully at my side. This isn’t the way it happens in lesbian novels. Am I doing something wrong, Ms. Behavior? Next time it hap pens, should I say something? — N ovice at Love D ear N o v ic e a t L o v e : It’s rude (and downright unlesbian) to drift off into bliss ful slumber mere moments after coming without regard for the person lying next to you. Surely your sexual partners need to he taught some manners or at least trained to he better lovers. Next time you find you’ve been left high and dry watching a selfish bottom sleep, start by saying something direct like, “I want to come, too.” If she doesn’t respond, try touching yourself. If even that fails to arouse any interest, lift one of your shoes from the heap of clothing that has been scattered on the flix>r and hold it in the air near your future-ex’s head. Smile sweetly and say, “What about ME, you self-centered wench?" If this does not convince her of the seriousness of her trans gression and prompt her into immediate action, do not smash her with the shoe. Simply put it on, along with the other one and the rest of your clothing. Leave (assuming it isn’t your apart ment) and don’t lix>k hack. am able to perform sexually, and everything’s been going OK. A few days ago, out of nowhere, Gretchen asked me if I’ve ever been with a man. I was shocked that she asked, so 1 denied it. She seemed reassured, but I feel guilty for having lied to her. Since then, I’ve been think ing about my sexual experi ences with men. In all honesty, they were much more exciting than my experiences with women. I think 1 can live with a not-so-exciting sex life in exchange for marriage and children, hut is it wrong for me to not tell Gretchen about my gay past? I rationalize it by telling myself that if I’m not acting on it, there’s no reason to mention it. What do you think? — Form erly G ay D ear F o r m e r ly G ay : If you were comfortable with yourself in your new “straight” life, you probably wouldn’t need to lie about the past or feel ashamed about it. The idea that being queer is just about “acting on it” is proba bly hound up in religious ideas about sinning. But sexual orien tation is not just about who you screw. If you love men and long to he near them and arc attract ed to their scents and think about sucking their dicks, can you really think of yourself as “straight” ? You say you want an “easier life,” hut, in reality, it’s only easi er to he straight if you really are straight. Pretending to be straight or trying to “decide" to he straight sounds like a sad (and/or lazy) alternative to self acceptance and being proud of who you are. Why don’t you start by com ing out as “formerly gay” to a therapist and then move on to telling the woman you plan to marry? Whether or not ytxj and Gretchen decide to stay togeth er, at least you’ll he making a decision that’s based on the tmth. j n © Meryl Cohn 200) Willamette Valley: Youth Gay, Lesbian, Bi, Tranagandar and Quo »honing Youth Group for ages 13 to 18 offers support, informa tion and fun in Eugene Free, confidential, adult facilitated (Drop in 4-6 pm Fnday Amazon Community Center. 2700 Htyard St 541 -584-3486.) (7/04) la sh Ion, Gay, M ssia al. Tranagandar Youth Group for ages 25 and youigsr meets every Mondsy in Eugene. (5 pm. Kohonti Center, 1414 IQncm i S t. 54134611)4J (7/04) D ear M s . B e h a v io r : I’m 28, and I used to he gay hut decided to give it up a few years ago. I’m not a homophobe; I just wanted an easier life. I’m engaged to marry Gretchen, a woman I do love. Our sex life isn’t thrilling, hut I M eryl C o h n is the authm o f Do What I Say: Ms. Behavior’s Guide to Gay and Lesbian Etiquette (H ougfium M tfflm ). Signed copies are available direedy from the author. Send questions or correspondence to m sbehauor@ aol.com .
