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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (June 7, 2002)
jijuna 7. 2002 28 Family Pride J ason L oyd Page 27 ^ ^aurel Lawrie L aurel L awrie ortlander Laurel Lawrie has spent 40 years m coming out. T h e Denver transplant knew she wanted to he a girl since she was 5. “ I cross-dressed in secret for 20 years,” she says. Most o f this time she spent m isidentifying herself. “ 1 just figured I was a transvestite because I did n ’t identify as gay at all,” she explains, identifying as a heterosexual woman tcxlay. “ I d id n ’t know about transsexualism then.” A fter college in Boulder— “ once 1 didn’t have to deal with roommates or anything”— Lawrie read extensively about transgender identities and realized she was transsexual. “ But I was still in the closet,” she admits. “ 1 felt this major pressure to fulfill the male role model.” So much so that she came to Portland with a woman she intended to marry. T h e point came where she knew she had to seal that closet door forever or com e out once and for all. “ Fortunately,” she asserts, “ 1 came out. She was honest with her fiancée, hut then she had to face another truth about herself. “ A s 1 learned how to stake out my own ground, 1 realized 1 had my own homophobia to get over and (increase) my own tolerance o f difference." A t this point, Lawrie finally sought thera py and, at nearly 40, finally took “ what they call the first step,” she says, “ living and work ing as a woman.” She chose to begin these steps at the w om en’s bookstore In O ther Words, which provided her first public expo sure as a woman. She volunteered there every Sunday for the past five years, just recently handing over that shift to someone else. The only transsexual woman to volunteer at the store, she says she never had any problems with the staff or cus tomers and felt it was the perfect way to ease herself through her transition. T h e same can almost he said for her regu lar job at C o ffe e People, except for one cus tom er w ho told her she was “ disgusted" at being served by a transvestite. Lawrie quickly responded, “ Excuse me, I’m a transsexi4al.” Lawrie is a regular guest at Portland State University classes talking about sexuality and gender issues. Eventually, she wants to help with transitioning kids at the Sexual Minority Youth Recreation Center. But for now, she’s still working on being her self. “ I’m more interested in stabilizing my day- to-day life before I feel strong enough to become more visible.” — LB ason Loyd grew up in Orem, a small town in Utah that was 99 percent Mormon. “ I always knew I was different, always attracted to males,” he shares. He avoided his feelings for a long time, even getting engaged to a woman briefly. When he finally mus tered the courage to “come out to myself,” he also decided to come out to his family— not a simple chore given the virulence o f Mormon teach ings on the subject and the sheer num ber o f people involved: two sets o f par ents (after a divorce), 15 siblings and stepsihlings, and many other relatives. Reactions were surprisingly posi tive, with less anguish and hysteria than is often the case. “Some even congratulated me!” he recalls. This emboldened him to make a “pre emptive strike” on the always-dicey issue o f integrating a partner into the family, not asking if he could bring him but simply attending functions together. Loyd joined Affirmation, a group for gay and lesbian Monnons, during grad school. Founded in 1977, with several thousand members national ly, it offers support through a variety o f activities, from parties and potlucks to parade appearances and Jason Lo J candlelight vigils. T h e 32-year-old social worker has struck a balance between a quiet hut firm activism and an appreciation o f the positive aspects o f his M or mon identity, though as an “ inactive” member, he expects to he excommunicated at some point. Part o f his activism means keeping the church informed o f Affirmation’s existence and activi ties, bringing attention to the horrific results of its homophobia, which includes a disproportion ate number o f gay and lesbian Mormon suicides. Affirmation recently sponsored its second mul ticity candlelight vigil to honor these victims at key locales right outside Mormon temples. “Our whole point in doing that is to tell the church, ‘This is an issue you’re not dealing with,’ ” he says. Perhaps some o f the incremental changes occurring in the church— discussions o f a genet ic component o f homosexuality, changing the official description from “ an abomination o f the Lord” to a “serious sin”— have been inspired by groups like Affirmation. A n d maybe because o f people like Loyd that “serious sin" eventually will he upgraded to its proper place: “ something to celebrate.” — GM 90.7 PORTLAND M ichael S anchez he gold quarter- note earring flickered in Michael Sanchez’s lobe. He smiled, waved hello and got into the car, and off we went to chat about his music, his activism, his childhood, his coming out and his T Michael Sanchez pride. It’s a miracle that Sanchez had time to sit and talk over hot cocoa. The Mt. Hood C om munity C ollege freshman plays trumpet in the school’s jazz hand and french horn in its sym phony, plays in the pit orchestra for musicals, sings in the Portland Gay M en’s Chorus and picks up a little extra cash now and then per forming at parties and events. He moved to the Portland area just last summer Auto, Home, Life & Business "Your Independent Insurance Agency" NEWS, PUBLIC A FF A IR S AND MUSIC T H A T YOU W O N 'T HEAR AN YW HER E E L S E . 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