jijuna 7. 2002
28
Family Pride
J ason L oyd
Page 27
^
^aurel Lawrie
L aurel L awrie
ortlander Laurel Lawrie has spent 40 years
m coming out.
T h e Denver transplant knew she wanted to
he a girl since she was 5. “ I cross-dressed in
secret for 20 years,” she says.
Most o f this time she spent m isidentifying
herself. “ 1 just figured I was a transvestite
because I did n ’t identify as gay at all,” she
explains, identifying as a heterosexual woman
tcxlay. “ I d id n ’t know about transsexualism
then.”
A fter college in Boulder— “ once 1 didn’t
have to deal with roommates or anything”—
Lawrie read extensively about transgender
identities and realized she was transsexual.
“ But I was still in the closet,” she admits. “ 1 felt
this major pressure to fulfill the male role
model.”
So much so that she came to Portland
with a woman she intended to marry. T h e
point came where she knew she had to seal
that closet door forever or com e out once and
for all. “ Fortunately,” she asserts, “ 1 came
out.
She was honest with her fiancée, hut then
she had to face another truth about herself. “ A s
1 learned how to stake out my own ground, 1
realized 1 had my own homophobia to get over
and (increase) my own tolerance o f difference."
A t this point, Lawrie finally sought thera
py and, at nearly 40, finally took “ what they
call the first step,” she says, “ living and work
ing as a woman.” She chose to begin these
steps at the w om en’s bookstore In O ther
Words, which provided her first public expo
sure as a woman.
She volunteered there every Sunday for the
past five years, just recently handing over that
shift to someone else. The only transsexual
woman to volunteer at the store, she says she
never had any problems with the staff or cus
tomers and felt it was the perfect way to ease
herself through her transition.
T h e same can almost he said for her regu
lar job at C o ffe e People, except for one cus
tom er w ho told her she was “ disgusted" at
being served by a transvestite. Lawrie quickly
responded, “ Excuse me, I’m a transsexi4al.”
Lawrie is a regular guest at Portland State
University classes talking about sexuality and
gender issues. Eventually, she wants to help with
transitioning kids at the Sexual Minority Youth
Recreation Center.
But for now, she’s still working on being her
self. “ I’m more interested in stabilizing my day-
to-day life before I feel strong enough to become
more visible.”
— LB
ason Loyd grew up in Orem, a
small town in Utah that was 99
percent Mormon. “ I always knew I
was different, always attracted to
males,” he shares.
He avoided his feelings for a long
time, even getting engaged to a
woman briefly. When he finally mus
tered the courage to “come out to
myself,” he also decided to come out
to his family— not a simple chore
given the virulence o f Mormon teach
ings on the subject and the sheer num
ber o f people involved: two sets o f par
ents (after a divorce), 15 siblings and
stepsihlings, and many other relatives.
Reactions were surprisingly posi
tive, with less anguish and hysteria
than is often the case. “Some even
congratulated me!” he recalls. This
emboldened him to make a “pre
emptive strike” on the always-dicey
issue o f integrating a partner into the
family, not asking if he could bring
him but simply attending functions
together.
Loyd joined Affirmation, a group
for gay and lesbian Monnons, during
grad school. Founded in 1977, with
several thousand members national
ly, it offers support through a variety
o f activities, from parties and
potlucks to parade appearances and Jason Lo
J
candlelight vigils.
T h e 32-year-old social worker has struck a
balance between a quiet hut firm activism and an
appreciation o f the positive aspects o f his M or
mon identity, though as an “ inactive” member,
he expects to he excommunicated at some point.
Part o f his activism means keeping the church
informed o f Affirmation’s existence and activi
ties, bringing attention to the horrific results of
its homophobia, which includes a disproportion
ate number o f gay and lesbian Mormon suicides.
Affirmation recently sponsored its second mul
ticity candlelight vigil to honor these victims at
key locales right outside Mormon temples. “Our
whole point in doing that is to tell the church,
‘This is an issue you’re not dealing with,’ ” he says.
Perhaps some o f the incremental changes
occurring in the church— discussions o f a genet
ic component o f homosexuality, changing the
official description from “ an abomination o f the
Lord” to a “serious sin”— have been inspired by
groups like Affirmation. A n d maybe because o f
people like Loyd that “serious sin" eventually
will he upgraded to its proper place: “ something
to celebrate.”
— GM
90.7 PORTLAND
M ichael
S anchez
he gold quarter-
note
earring
flickered in Michael
Sanchez’s lobe. He
smiled, waved hello
and got into the car,
and off we went to
chat
about
his
music, his activism,
his childhood, his
coming out and his
T
Michael Sanchez
pride.
It’s a miracle that Sanchez had time to sit
and talk over hot cocoa. The Mt. Hood C om
munity C ollege freshman plays trumpet in the
school’s jazz hand and french horn in its sym
phony, plays in the pit orchestra for musicals,
sings in the Portland Gay M en’s Chorus and
picks up a little extra cash now and then per
forming at parties and events.
He moved to the Portland area just last summer
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