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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Sept. 7, 2001)
▼ People of all sexual orientations belong to the group, and SOFFAs (Significant Others, Friends, Family and Allies) are welcome. A few men bring their children to the get-togethers, which usually attract about 15 people. Coqsure also serves as a resource providing members with information such as counseling options, health tips and sports teams. by P eter Z uckerman Henre Andosca, a founding member of Coqsure, has begun hormone treatments and hen Kimber Nelson invited his father now usually passes. In trans lingo, “passing” to a kickhall game last summer, he means to he perceived as the gender he consid actually was inviting him to meet his ers himself. Indeed, Andosca already speaks in new son. a quiet baritone. You see, the event was presented hy Coqsure, He notes that coming out as trans is often a trans social group for people who were horn or more a fear than a reality. One time, Andosca felt raised female but identify differently. Nelson was slightly nervous about how a friend would react about to come out to his father as a man. when he heard his big news. But his fears evapo They sat down together on a bench, and the rated a few days later, when the acquaintance presented Andosca with the txK>k A Guide to a 22-year-old tcx>k comfort in knowing his friends were nearby for support. “My dad has always Man’s Body. been liberal,” Nelson explains, “hut 1 was ner He sheepishly tells a story about the early vous about telling him.” meetings of the group when the members The two began talking. A few minutes later, thought they ought to engage in “manly" activi they stood up and walked across the field ties. They tried shooting pool and acting tough. together. “But I was all “Then my dad started intro Kimber Nelson (left) nervous about ducing himself to the other and Curtis Rudd being a guy,” people,” Nelson recalls with Andosca admits. “How was I sup relief. “He refereed the game...he was totally support posed to act like a ive. It went so much better than man?” I expected.” Later, when he Nelson joined Coqsure a lit admitted his feel ings to the others, tle more than a year ago. He had close friends hut felt isolat it turned out they ed from the trans community. all felt the same “I knew trans people exist way. “We were all talking like girls,” ed, hut where were they?’ he he recalls, gestur says. The group provided the ing flamboyantly. opportunity for Nelson to find Some Coqsure out. Coqsure attracts people members appear' who stop off at every point more masculine along the gender continuum. than others. For Some members use the female example, Trystan Reynolds, who pronoun “she,” some use the does not yet pass male pronoun “he,” some use “he" and “she” interchange as a man, already has researched ably, and some use the gender- getting hormone nonspecific pronouns “hir" treatments and (pronounced “here”) and sexual reassign “s’he” (pronounced “see”). T he Coqsure pamphlet ment surgery, in case he decides he also wants a physical trans defines gender identity like this: “Gender is not a formation. set of binary categories but rather a spectrum.” In fact, the group has people with at least seven The first step is to see a therapist who will evaluate whether the candidate is psychological different gender identifications, including inter- ly stable and capable of making such life-alter sex (bom with physical characteristics of both male and female), bigender (behavioral expres ing decisions. After several more meetings, the sions of both male and female) and gender patient might be referred to an endocrinologist with the diagnosis of gender identity disorder. queer (which defies a concrete definition). Because the participants range in age from early teens to mid-50s, someone who’s been in a similar situation is sure to be available for con sultation. For example, they know what hap pens if you’re legally married and your partner has a sex-change operation. Indeed, many of the members have faced this challenge. Oregon law does not specify what happens to a marriage under those conditions. As a result, the partners can stay married and receive all legal benefits. However, if tested in the courts, these conditions might change. Safe haven Women questioning their gender identity have a place to get answers “I knew trans people existed, but where were they?" ■ ■ " —Kimber Nelson “W hen I tell them I'm gay, th ey g iv e m e a w eird lo o k lik e there's som eth in g w ron g w ith m e. T h ey can't accep t th at I'm a man." f —Trystan Reynolds “It’s total hunk they would have to diagnose the way I am as a disorder,” Reynolds remarks. He points out that homosexuality also was con sidered a disorder prior to 1972. Then the endocrinologist prescribes “T-shots” (testosterone). Changes include the voice drop ping in register and cracking; in fact, this is called a “second puberty.” Facial structure often morphs into a more oblong shape, and facial hair begins to sprout. Next, body fat redistributes, breasts shrink, the neck thickens, and muscles bulk up. For those who want to take it to the next level, there is “top surgery” (a double mastecto my). And last, but far from least, is the ultimate transformation of one’s vagina into a shiny new penis and pals. However, Reynolds isn’t ready for any of that yet. He says he prefers to avoid hormones for now, because he loves to sing and still wants to hit the high notes. Thankfully, Reynolds says, at Coqsure “there’s no pressure to transition.” However, some members have had surgery. Reynolds joined Coqsure because he hated feeling alone. Even though he identifies as a gay man and loves singing karaoke at gay bars, he doesn’t feel like part of the scene. “W hen I tell them I’m gay, they give me a weird look like there’s something wrong with me. They can’t accept that I’m a man,” he confides in disgust. “But at Coqsure I don’t have to explain myself. Every single person has been through the same things I’m going through. We under stand each other.” The group gathers for monthly activities including barbecues, billiards, bowling, coffee and camping trips. Coqsure also provides sup port for significant others. Reynolds believes many gay men and les bians discriminate against the trans community. “They don’t understand that trans rights are queer rights. You get gay-bashed because you’re not in the traditional gender role; you get trans- bashed for the same reason.” in Anyone interested in learning more about trans people or joining COQSURE can reach the group at coqsure-oumer@onelist.com or visit wuav . one list. com!community!coqsure. P eter Z uckerman is a student at Reed College and an intern at Just Out. Write to him at pez@ reed.edu. Cascade For Group Encounters and One on One Peer Education Call 503-223-! %
