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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (May 21, 1999)
999 8 J liM iU h e w s L ow - income L everage Investing isn’t about placing a trade. It’s about planning a future. Love M akes a Family's low-income project connects Fred R. Elledge sexual minority families to social services by Michael Barrett Assistant Vice President-Investments One Main Place, Ste. 1040, 101 SW Main St., Portland 503 248-1334 1 800 444-3235 HJ^b a n co rp Piper Jaffray. Securities prod u cts an d services are offered through U .S. B an co rp Piper Ja ffra y Inc., m em ber SIPC and NYSE, Inc., a sub sidiary o f U .S. B an corp. 3 /9 9 -0 3 8 6 N ot FDIC insured N o bank guarantee M ay lose value Refill or Landfill? Use it Again... ■ 1 And Again... ■ ■ » x .Î. î i ¡f ■ ix ........:':????! : . W- % L t :» >. ' .A * CA I * 1 And Again... 1 J J Ni "■ f* \ ■tV • <; s • • » ¡ , p *<\ .. i BLv. And Again... & r ! ^ I n s. ; j ; W 1 ■ ■■ m- P 1 J ' Refilling Bottles For 20 Years. 25C Off Each Refill. lotions & oils 3638 SE Hawthorne • 236-7976 # 710 NW 2 3rd Avenue • 248-9748 O an out family. All agree that being out encourages pride and self-affirmation within the family unit, which is an important aspect of gay and lesbian parenting; still, some parents admit they feel the need to downplay their sexuality in certain situ ations. Some parents even skip their childrens school-related activities because of concerns about homophobia. The parents of adolescents note that sporting events in par ticular often seem omi nous. One mother, who asked to remain anony mous, complains of what she describes as “a generic jock homophobic environ ment (encouraged by her] son’s football coach, a member of the (Oregon Citizens Alliance who] made a lot of homophobic remarks during practice.” The situation was so extreme that her son asked his mother not to bring her partner to his games. Another parent says that when she came out of the closet, she displayed her pride by placing bumper stickers on her car. “People threw eggs at my house and my car, and my kids got harassed [for having a lesbian mother],” she says, adding that she felt com pelled to choose between pride and the safety of her children. She removed the stickers. Other parents, meanwhile, say they are adamant about remaining open about their sex uality. “If you can’t behold your lesbianism as a beautiful, valuable thing, your children will pick up on that,” says Shez, a mother of one. David, a father of two, echoes her sentiment. He fears sending mixed messages about his sex uality to his children “by being hesitant... because they will grow up being hesitant about it themselves.” But one mother counters: “1 don’t want to shove anything in their face, like Tm queer’ or ‘I’m a lesbian.’ I just want to be an effective par ent. It’s not about me, it’s about being a mom." Greg Thompson, a Franklin High School counselor and a gay parent, is the meeting’s facilitator. “You make decisions based on your own environment and reality,” he explains. And you play different roles according to the situation.” T T he R eal M o t h e r G o o s e Voted America s n { Craft Gallery 1997 Washington Square 503.620.2243 S l H w H i ■ M and 1**98 9 0 1 S W Yamhill 503.223.9510 H I Portland Airport 503.284.9929 . ^ > M M * ne evening in early May, a hand ful of sexual minority parents are plunked down in a Northeast Portland church where they weigh the pros and cons of being he meeting—sponsored by Love Makes a Family, a Portland-based organization for sexual minority families— includes participants from gay and lesbian families from various eth nic and socio-economic backgrounds. Some attendees are from the organization’s “low-income sexual minority family project.” The pilot project, funded by the city of Port land, aims to address the needs of low-income sexual minority families. Kerri Dee, a graduate student of social work at Portland State University, works with the project. Her job is to find families in need who qualify for the project and build a support net work among them. She has helped parents access child care and legal resources, and assisted them with the red tape of the welfare system. On the project since last fall, Dee has post ed flyers at various social service agencies, bookstores, bars and other locations. Still, there are currently only seven families in the pro gram, which is funded for 10. “Recruiting families is the most difficult part of my job,” Dee says. Despite that, Bonnie Tinker, executive director of Love Makes a Family, says her orga- nization “determined there was a need [tor this project] via personal experience among staff...and from meeting other families in need.” O n this night in early May, sexual minority families of all income levels are sharing their thoughts. “After all, no matter what our income, we have to deal with many of the same issues," Tin ker says. But she also acknowledges that low-income families encounter special difficulties. “Low-income families lack the resources middle-class families have that allow them to insulate their children [and] build support net works,” she explains. Having a chance to come together can alle viate some of the stress and provide low-income families with a vital network base. While Portland is considered relatively pro gressive with regard to sexual minority issues, suburbs and rural areas offer a stark contrast and the situation can be particularly bleak tor low-income parents outside urban boundaries, says Marcy Westerling of the Rural Organizing Project, a nonprofit organization that works with human dignity groups in rural and small town Oregon. Lower wages and fewer job opportunities notwithstanding, Westerling says, “gays and les bians are already econom ically vulnerable because they face possible discrimination at work based on their sexuality, and they do not have the legal protection found in cities.’ Given all that, any support— especially far those sexual minorities strapped with financial constraints— is critical, she and Tinker say. Though the city’s funding is a one-time deal that is winding down, Tinker vows: Were committed to maintaining this project. We believe it’s very necessary.” ■ Sexual minority families seeking support may tall L ove M akes a F amily at (5 0 3 ) 228-3892.