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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 15, 1997)
just out ▼ august 15. 1097 ▼ 21 TO BE OR NOT TO BE ‘ME’ Continued from page 19 unfortunately, clients expect a certain image when they visit...and that my earrings portray a certain stereotype. I asked what stereotype that was and got no response. I asked again what stereotype that was, and was told, “Whatever the clients may think.’ I asked, “What do you think?’ to which the firm employee replied, ‘Oh, it doesn’t bother me. I have a friend who’s like that.’ I then thanked her for her time and terminated the call.” In a letter sent to Just Out and the company, Kelly writes: “Straight people do not realize what...[they) are really saying when they say, ‘Take out your earrings.’ What they are indeed saying is, ‘You are not fit to live in this world as you are.' Every time they try to change us to be like them, they take a piece of our humanity. They murder, in effect, a part o f us.” He adds, “Until people of all orientations stop playing the ‘passing’ game and start show ing their employers that quali fied, capable people come in an enormous range of differ- ences, [employers' ] homopho- ^ bia and ignorance will contin ue to flourish. Customers and clients will still come, even with a gay male wearing earrings at the front desk. The public is much more accepting than employers know.’’ The owner of the company, who is openly gay and estimates that 30 percent of his staff is gay or lesbian, tells Just Out he wants to promote a pro- fessional environment. “Excessive jewelry on men or women is not suitable. One or two tasteful earrings, that’s one thing, but 10?” he says, adding that his immediate “ Straight people s Oi Heusinkveld says of her B0L1 digs, where she has worked for the past eight years. However, during a stint with the Portland Development Commission, Stevens- Schwenger says her cubicle was stripped and ster- ile. “That’s just the way it was there.” she says, adding, “It’s easy when you’re at school to be yourself. Or to be yourself with your peers. But when you go to work at Intel, you essentially become Intel.” Changes in the work environment— and what do not realize what... [ they] are really saying when they say, ‘ Take out your earrings. ’ What they are indeed saying is, * You are not fit to live in this world as you are. ’Every time the\ try to change us to be like them, they take a piece o f our humanity. They murder, in effect, a part of us. ” » „ h iL r k p l l v tvC D lK i v e i i y concern was that he felt Kelly was far too qualified for the position. He also takes offense with Kelly’s allusion that the company stifles gay people’s expression. “That’s just not true,” he says. Kelly, however, remains unconvinced. “Some people may say, ‘It’s only eight hours a day. what’s the big deal?’ But if you do that every day, it’s going to spill into the rest of your life,” he says. “Repression builds and kills creativity and spontaneity, and the ramifications can manifest themselves in food issues, alcohol abuse, weird sexual practices.... With or without that job. you have to live with yourself.” oan Stevens-Schwenger, spokeswoman for the Oregon Bureau of Labor and Industries, which J investigates claims of possible violations of civil rights laws, says there are no protections in place per se involving, for example, employees' (nonreligious) dress or demeanor. Stevens-Schwenger says companies may pro- mote a certain image, and unless they're discrimi- nating against an employee or prospective employ- ee on the basis of a protected class, well, tough. “I have colorful kid’s art all over my office," she i for employment elsewhere— which took him to the interview," but Rutan declined. Gendvilas also Master Eye Associates, a company providing says his personal preference for a corporate image vision-related services. is “an IBM look.” Rutan says he called about an advertised posi As for the expression of his identity. Rutan says, tion as a doctor's assistant. “ I do express myself as a queer person through my He says his first phone interview was quick, but clothes, my piercings, my hair. Having to compro went well. “The next day I had an hourlong con mise for work is hard, but I can’t afford not to.” versation with |manager Kriss Carpenter|. He Rutan says he’s worked at Pizza Hut with blue hair seemed to like the way I answered questions. It with no problem. He goes to his current job with went great— he was even talking about benefits,” Alternative Services Oregon Inc. with piercings says Rutan, adding that Carpenter requested that intact— as do other employees. Again, it’s no big Rutan come in to Master Eye A ssociates’ deal. Clackamas Town Center office for a meeting. “I He says, “I'm glad I didn't get the job with asked about the dress code. Nothing was ever mentioned “/ understand why a business may not want some about jewelry," he says. one to be wearing a nose ring or whatever during An appointment was arranged. work. This is a nonpermanent fixture on my face Though he usually wears ear rings, finger rings and a nose ring. that could easily have been removed. But he didn't Rutan plucked them all off, even ask. He just jumped all over me. ” slipped on a pair of slacks and but ton-down collared shirt, and head Joshua Rutan ed out. "I was very nicely groomed," he says. Master Eye Associates, because I wouldn't want to However, Rutan forgot to remove his labret. a work for a place that treats people that way simply piercing just below his lower lip. because of a piece of jewelry.” “I got there and was ushered into an examination Though he was hurt and taken aback by the room. I thought. “Oh maybe this is more private.' episode. Rutan says, “ I think I’m stronger for it.... Well I turn around, and of course I'm all smiles, You can’t let it get you down. Think positive, let and then I see [Carpenter] glaring at me.” Rutan them know that they wronged you, but don’t let it recounts. “All of a sudden he says, ‘This is over destroy you.” now. I’m not going to put up with that facial-pierc ing crap.’ He just cut me off as a person. I was ound advice, says Dr. Heather Stein, a psy stunned.” chologist resident at the Portland-based Rutan left, but was so angry that he later called Delaunay Family of Services, which pro Carpenter's supervisor, telling him he wanted vides counseling services to youth and families. Carpenter to apologize. Stein, 30, thought long and hard about her nose “I understand why a business may not want ring, sometimes purple-hued hair and ankle tattoos someone to be wearing a nose ring or whatever upon interviewing for a position at Delaunay sev during work. This is a nonpermanent fixture on my eral months back. face that could easily have been removed. But he She decided to leave it all in place, despite her didn't even ask. He just jumped all over me.” says feelings that Delaunay might be a somewhat Rutan. adding that Carpenter called him back only reserved employment environment. to “apologize for my perception of how things She describes the person who interviewed her as went down— not for what he actually did.” a “pretty conservative Christian man,” who did Carpenter refused any comment for this article, ultimately wind up mentioning “the thing in [her] saying he could not address a “situation involving nose.” Stein, who had counseled clients for many an individual and the company.” years, countered by saying she didn’t believe her His supervisor. Dr. Tony Gendvilas, however, piercing would be a problem. tells Just Out that following the incident Master Indeed, Stein argues that her ability to express Eye Associates invited Rutan back to “complete and represent herself freely and honestly makes her relationship with clients "that much richer.” She was hired— the man who interviewed her is now her boss— and carries a current caseload of about 35 clients, including children and both younger and older adults. “In my work, it’s real impor tant to be genuine. Clients pick up on masks," she says, adding. “Sometimes kids may say, ‘You’re weird,' and that will generate a discussion about dif ferences. It’s been a wonderful tool.” Stein, who has been at Delaunay for nearly seven months, suspects that had the agency not been comfortable with her more tangible forms of self-expression, e.g. jewelry, that it probably would not have been tolerant of her sexual ori entation. either. She is an out bisexual. Stein says, “I knew if a place wouldn’t accept me as I am, it would not be a healthy environ ment for me or my clients.” Despite the risks—economi cally and emotionally— Stein decided it was worth it to be true to herself. “I understand how hard it can be to stick with it,” she tells Just Out , “but if you do, it can be a powerful experience that takes you to a place of strength.” Heather Stein aM owed^win come, she adds, as cultural mores evolve. Look at how. ,ar workplace during the past 20 years. Or look at domestic partnerships for same-sex couples,” she says. “You even see many more people in the workplace with pierc- ings and tattoos than you did just five years ago. A lot depends on where you are and where you're working, but conventions are shifting a little.” At the same time, being asked to suppress oneself can be trying, says Dr. Linda Grounds, a psychologist who is also the owner of Vita Gallery, an art gallery in Northwest Portland which often features work by outsider and self- taught artists. “If someone with a piercing or tattoo feels it is a genuine symbol of their identity as a person, then to be asked to remove it can be disconcert ing. alienating and create a sense of depriva- tion,” Grounds says, adding that whatever the issue, when an employer treats an employee or prospective employee in a disrespectful manner, it can be traumatic, uch was the case with Joshua Rutan, 20, who has worked for the past two years at a residential-care facility serving develop- mentally disabled adults, Though he enjoys his work, Rutan says he was beginning to bum out. and decided to look [)r
