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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 1, 1997)
j u s t o u t ▼ a u g u s t 1, 1 9 9 7 V 3 3 STONEWALL BABY Q ueer citizenship Being part of the world’s biggest fondue pot doesn’t have to mean blending in—our difference adds flavor No Embalming • No Casket Crem ation is the uncom plicated, dignified alternative to a “traditional” funeral. By pre-planning with the H eritage Society, y o u ’ll be assured that your wishes are specifically carried out at a fraction o f the cost. There are no em balm ing or casket charges and the burden o f last-m inute decisions is not left to family or others. Enjoy peace o f m ind with H eritage Society M em bership. ▼ by Will O ’Bryan M uch earlier in the century, this straight people probably resent that overreaction. country threw open the gates for They may not understand the photo, but they might millions of immigrants from for be willing to talk about it. And if they can’t talk eign shores. In an effort to please about it with us, who can they talk about it with? their new neighbors, many of the We’ve had to think about sex all our lives. We immigrants “Americanized” themselves. Some know it pretty well. We can explain things that changed their exotic-sounding names to some Heteromericans won’t ever understand if we won’t thing a little more Main Street. Some threw off talk about them. “Cock rings? What on earth for? their native costume in exchange for denim. Dental dams? What are you talking about? Top? It’s as though they felt the Great American Bottom? You’re confusing me!” If the leaders Melting Pot could absorb them if they were a little don’t lead... less spicy, which is unfortunate. So many great Our Pride festivals have been pretty insular cultures that could’ve been incorporated into our events, growing out of what probably looked like society were watered down for the sake of homo freak shows to breeding folks (artificially insemi geneity. Perhaps there’s a lesson for us queer nated lesbians aside). U.S. Cinco de Mayo festi immigrants to heed. vals aren’t reserved for Latino/a Americans, Our journey to America’s Heartland didn’t though. And how many of us look upon St. require us to cross oceans, just closets—but clos Patrick’s Day as the one day of the year when ets can be as treacherous as the deepest oceans. everybody gets to be Irish (and puke green beer)? The immigrants had family recipes from the Old It certainly would do our fellow citizens well to World and accents they try to be gay for a day. tried to hide; we’ve brought I’m not suggesting some flair and some good there’s any hope that my m usic. But have we mother will show up for a “Americanized” ourselves potluck lesbian dungeon as well? party, but we don’t have to We’re starting to ven go to extremes. This coun ture out of our gay ghettos try is developed enough into the suburbs, with our that it should be throwing Subarus and rainbow flags. off its sexually repressed Our neighbors look at us shackles—and we’re just and see nothing out of the the Americans to lead the ordinary. We don’t feel way. But this leadership threatened and neither do role is one we are uncom they. But at what cost? fortable with, to say the Americans of yester least. year co u ld ’ve learned Presently, in our dis much more from the cul course with straight people tural influx than they did. Some cultures could’ve we talk about our sexuality as though it were the taught the individualistic American psyche that a least defining aspect of our culture instead of what strong sense of community obligation isn’t neces it is: the foremost. We learned throughout our sarily bad. Some cultures could’ve taught their lives how to blend in, how to allay suspicions, stiff-collared compatriots to let their hair down a how to move quietly. But at this point there’s no bit. The religious influx could’ve added more to turning back. We’re here, we’re queer, we’re our national spirituality than it did. moving in next door, and everybody knows it. And what can we queers bring to the table We’ve always wanted to be treated equally. before we get sucked into the pot? It’s what we’ve been fighting for all along. But we Throughout most of our history, we’ve been don’t have to sanitize ourselves. The melting pot deviants. Sexual deviants. Granted, we weren’t will taste better if all the fruits and vegetables deviant by nature, only by law. But in this great, aren’t first dipped in bleach. God-fearing land of ours, maybe there’s some Our sexual sensibilities are provocative by thing of our sexual insight that would help add national standards. It’s been so long since this some spice to this very vanilla, oh-so-very sexu country saw a sexual revolution, and we have the ally repressed culture of ours. resources to ignite one the likes of which they’ve Heterosexuals themselves are having a seem never seen. Multiple partners. Multiple partners ingly difficult time of it. They apparently enjoy sex at once. Remaining on wonderful terms with past as much as we do, but they don’t like to talk about lovers. Frank talk about sex. Collectively, we’ve it. Sometimes they divorce. Sometimes they cheat. seen and done it all, though we’re remarkably And it all looks very messy and mean-spirited. If quiet about it in mixed company. As we become we can add some insight, help them in some way, increasingly mainstream, we’re beginning to act shouldn’t we? As queers—lesbians, gay men, bi hush hush even among ourselves. sexuals, transgenders—we’re certainly not perfect It’s hard for us to remember that we’ve done or omniscient where sex is concerned, but our nothing wrong, that our national values regarding wealth of knowledge on the topic is fantastically sex were handed down from the Puritans. Of rich nonetheless. And we’re probably advanced to course, there’s plenty of sex in America, but how the point where I can talk to a straight peer candidly much of it is healthy? Not to say that we re all about sex without getting my ass kicked. qualified to be therapists, but we can talk from As we take our first steps in their mainstream experience. world, maybe we’re becoming good citizens who, Maybe my mother won’t end up in the dun following the mainstream lead, don’t like to talk geon. In her retirement community in Florida, about sex either. But we shouldn’t turn our backs nobody has a basement anyway. But if some on our roots. And if we are still talking about sex, retired lesbian moves in next door to her, I hope we don’t seem to want to dish the dirt with our she’ll speak frankly with Mom about sex. If not, straight neighbors. I can always take my mother to It’s My Pleasure Jesse Helms sees a photo of a man with a bull the next time she’s in town. As a good queer whip up his keister, and he goes ballistic. A lot of citizen, I think I’m duty bound, actually. Call to receive literature or fill out and mail this form at no obligation. Name______________ Address. City___ State Zip. Prepay information cheek here □ Phone ( )______________ ------- Lifetim e M em bership— one time for $20 ------ Serving Multnomah, Clackamas, Washington and Clark Counties 24-Hour Service * 468 0# 11er italic X Ml Ml >MI. \I M M H U C 7 1630 SYV M orrison St. Portland, OR 97205 (503) 236-4X66 Don't Call Us We'll Call Yon I T RANSFORMATIONAL H ypnotherapy Tired of calling in to check your voice mail? 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