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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 1, 1990)
A love-letter to life “Some age that seemed so far away ... » forever hated being single, I finally turned my back on a lifelong search for the perfect duet, determined to make the best of a solo perform In younger years you play and play, ance. What a bitch! Too young to take the veil The future brighter, day by day. and too old to play the field! (Man joins Then, suddenly, you’re gay and gray; nunnery! Film at eleven!) Some age that seemed so far away. It was October, 1967, and I had joined my You ask: “Was youth as wisely spent two gay siblings in Seattle—a younger brother As school tuition, groceries, rent?” and my twin, Ron. Suddenly I was invited to a My joints are stiff, my back is bent. New Year’s Party by someone I’d never met, Get-up-and-go, got up and went! someone who’d heard about the three gay brothers from mutual friends. Early New Year’s I’m diabetic (pills, not shots). . . Eve day, Ron flew to Los Angeles to start life My hair is growing thin in spots . . . with his lover, George. My younger brother, My heart does thrilling dits and dots . . . then resident manager of Seattle’s Edgewater But still and all I’ve lots and lots . . . Inn, had parties to oversee all over the place. So To be so very grateful for. I went to the party with the couple who’d first I’ve had, for over 20 years, mentioned my brothers and me.to R.J. The love and laughter, tears and fears; As I walked down the stairs in my fringed The dream that fades and reappears; buckskin boots and the fringed Pcndleton-style That wrap itself in mist, then clears. plaid shirt Ron had made me for Christmas, I heard someone say “Well guess who’s gonna At 40, sans companion clone, be dessert!”. The voice was an ex-lover of I made my peace: “I’ll live alone” R.J.’s who, as it turned out, hit the pie right on But wait! I thought I heard the phone . . . the a la mode! Just someone selling pom .. .or pone. No, we didn’t get together that night. Or for (My hearing’s going, too, dammit!) that matter, for several weeks. But, genuinely impressed that anyone would invite a stranger But now, at nearly 63, to anything as intimate as a New Year’s Eve The things that once eluded me celebration, I called R.J. the very next day and Just wait like presents on a tree then followed it up with a thank-you card. After Each day for me to wake and see. that, we talked on the phone nearly every day R. J. stepped in and changed my life . . . for hours at a time, discovering shared interests Carved hearts on trees with loving knife . . . in art, theatre, literature and music (he’s a Erased the black marks in my life! brilliant painter and writes the most gorgeous Straight friends: “W ho’s husband and who’s wife!” poetry). \ (They never get it right!) There were dinners out, climaxing with one at the Red Carpet, where Roy had taken me to Cold weather finds us tightly curled. say good-bye. He had resigned himself to a Like cats, against the snowy world. solitary life in his neat little home in Montlake While spangles Old Man Winter hurled and, much as he liked me, didn’t see that I was Keep summer’s webs all jeweled and pearled. reason enough to break the comfortable pattern So . . . not all words are warm or wise. he’d very happily established for himself. He And not all blessings “in disguise,” hadn’t counted on a stubborn Taurus who, once But there is stardust in my eyes he’s made up his mind something’s worth And I’m the luckiest of guys. fighting for, just digs in for the fight! He very politely pointed out, first of all, An now, when all the fires are banked, what he thought were the physical disadvan The old Victrola needle’s cranked, tages. I told him that if I wanted to fall in love R. J. and I, our forces ranked, with a fat, bald headed old man that was my Give thanks and know that w e’ve been thanked! business! On the 2nd on next February, we will celebrate 23 of the happiest and most rewarding s a native Oregonian, I can truly say that of my 62 years. it’s a long way from Roseburg to I feel like the luckiest person alive. Portland. At least the way I travelled: via New I’ve Really, lived out almost all of my fantasies. I’ve York, Venezuela and England. Fresh out of got most of the childhood garbage in the Roseburg Senior High, where I was editor of dumpster. I do the two things I love most for a the school newspaper, I was, at 18, the first living. I write and I sing. I’m married to a foreigner ever to write a column in his own talented painter who has turned out to be the language for the oldest daily paper in Vene perfect person for me to spend these shining zuela, Maracaibo’s El Panorama. moments, days and years with. Oh, we’ve had our sharp comers and scratched egos. You’re bound to have. It’s how and when (and where) you put on the bandages that sometimes makes all the difference. One thing about real love. You can kiss the bumps and bruises and make them well. At 26,1 started my singing career with the Ken Foeller Orchestra in Fort Worth, Texas, But enough about me. How about you? This where I had just replaced a guy named Pat column is to be an open forum for older gays. Boone as resident vocalist at WBAP-TV. I’ve We solicit your contributions: comments, com had the privilege of singing in Caracas, plaints, reminiscences, tributes to outstanding personalities in the gay and gray community, Venezuela, Folkstone, England, Phoenix, Las reminders of laudable achievements by older Vegas and Los Angeles, where I worked at a gays, paeans to lovers past and present, trips leading ad agency, was awarded a two-year contract with TAG Records and designed a line you’ve taken or would like to take ... what ever. of greeting cards for Bonjour Prints using the All of us at Just Out would like this column ‘Little People” cartoons developed during my to be a love letter to life. Whatever you decide stint as an Oregonian copyboy. to share with us, we sincerely want Just Years At 30,1 sailed to England on the Holland- to be yours! America Line’s flagship New Amsterdam, as We’re looking forward to hearing from you. publicist for Tacoma channel swimmer Bert Please write us at PO Box 15117, Portland, OR Thomas. 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