Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR
About The west shore. (Portland, Or.) 1875-1891 | View Entire Issue (March 1, 1881)
March, 1881. THE WEST SHORE. CHAFF. Watib oolort m doee whUky. Thi dim who dig 100 ft into the ground for wtr efe ulnpj t Wbt ii the earth lika a blokbord? Be cause th children of nuo multiply upon the fao of it Thi man who cornea about eolely to kill time hould oonfina himself striotly to hii own busi ness. Eviry to-morrow liu two handle. W ou tak bold of it by the handle of anxiety or the handle of faith. "Frki Chops" it a aign hung out by a Chi cago restaurant, and whan ouatomen apply they are ahown to a wood pile and handed an ax. A todno lady deaired ber lover to promiie her that he would never amoke another oigai. "I'll do it," he aaid) "tuatained by your love, a meerchauin will do for me." "Bridokt, I cannot allow you toraoeive your lover in the kitchen any longer." "It'a very kind of you, ma'am, but he ia almoat too bash ful to come into the parlor." All the men in an entire oounty in Minne sota turned out on a wolf hunt the other day. The reault wae 36 dog fighta an( the oapture of a fellow who bad run away from hit wife. An exohange aaya: "The bee atinga iteelf to death in trying to ating aomeone elae." Some men make things unoomfortable all around them for a aeaaon, but the end ia generally woraa fur themaelvea than for thoaa they eought to annoy. "Sta that my grave kept green," he war bled, under the window of hia lair one'a domi cile one pleasant night "I'll tend to the grave buiineaa, young man," ahooted her enraged paternal anoeator, aa he poked an old musket out of the eeoond story window. No more oon oert that evening. MY MONKEY. There never was auoh luok. I've alwaya thought that I'd rather have a monkey than be a million heir. There ia nothing that ooiild be half ao splendid aa a real live monkey, but ' ' course, I knew that I never oould have on until I should grow up and go to aea and bring borne monkeys and parrots and ahawla to mother just aa sailors alwaya do. But I've actually got a monkey.. It waa Mr. Travera that got the mon key for me. One day there oama a woman with an organ and a monkey into our yard. Bhs waa an Italian, but she oould apeak a sort of Eogliah, and aba aaid that tha " mur derin,' spalpeen of a monkey waa lust wearing 'the life of her out" Ho aaya Mr. Travera, " What will yon take for him f " and aaya she, " It'a live dollars I'd be after selling bim for, and may good luok go wid ye I " What did Mr. Iravora do but give her the money and band the monkey to me, saying, "Here, Jimmy I take bim and be happy?' Waan't I juat happy though f Jocko that's the monkey's name ia tha love liest monkey that aver lived. Toby Tyler may talk about hia "Mr. Btubbe." and tall how be nnderatanda everything aaid to bim, and bege for (trailers, and all that but I toll you Mr. Btubbe " waa just aa ordinary illitorit monkey alongside of my Jocko. I hadn't bad him o boar when he got oat of my anna and waa x the supper table before I oould get bim. The table waa all aet and Bridget wae juat going to ring the bell, bat the monkey didn't wait for nor. . To see him eating tha chicken salad waa juat wonderful He finished the whole dish In about two minutes, and waa washing it down with the oil out of tha aalad bottle when I oaoght bim. Mother waa awfully good about it and only aaid: "I'oor little beaat ho moat be half starved. Hasan, bow moon be reminds me of your brother." A good mother ia aa good a thing aa a boy desorvea, no matter bow good be ia. The aalad aomeway did tot aeem to agree with Jocko, for be waa dreadfully aick that sight Von should bave eeaa bow Ump be waa, jut lika girl that baa fainted away and her Soong man ia trying to lift ber up. Mother ootored bim. r)b gave hue oa tor -oil aa if be was her own son, and wrapped him up in a blanket and put a mustard plaster on hia stom ach, and soaked the end of hia tail in warm water. He waa all right tha nut day, and M (sal graMiul. I know lie wae gratelui because he showed it by trying to do good to others, at any rate to the oat Our oat wouldn't apeak to him at first but he ooaxed her with milk, juat aa ha bad aeen me do, and finally oaught her. It must have been dread fully aggravoking to the oat for instead of let ting her have the milk, he insisted that she waa aick and muat have medioins. Bo he took Bridget'a bottle of hair-oil and a big spoon and gave the oat auoh a dose. When I oaught him and made him let the oat go, there were about six tableepooutula of oil niiiaing. Mr. Travel aaid it waa a good thing, for it would improve the oat'a voioe and mak her yowl smoother, and that he had felt for a long time that she needed to be oiled. Mother said that tha mon key waa cruel, and it waa a shame, but I know that ha meant to be kind. He knew the oil mother gave him had done him good, and he wanted to do the oat good. I know just how he felt f"r I've been blamed many a time for trying to do good, and I oan tell you it alwaya hurl my feelings. The moukey was in the kitchen while Bridget waa getting dinner yesterday, and he watched her broil the eteak as if he was meaning to Inaro to oook and help her in her work, he's that kind and thoughtful. The oat was outdoors, but two of ber kittens were in the kitchen, and they were not old enough to be afraid of the monkey. When dinner waa served Bridget went upstairs, and byandhy mother aaya, " What that dreadful smell t Bure's you're alive, Husan. tha baby has fallen into the lire." Everybody lumped up and ran upstaira, all but me, fur I knew Jocko waa in tha kitchen, and I waa afraid it waa ha that waa burning. When 1 got into the kitchen, there waa that lovely moukey broil ing one of the kittens on the gridiron juat aa he had aeen Bridget broil the steak. The kit ten's fur waa singeing and aha waa mewing, and the other kitten was sitting up on the floor lick ing ber ohope and enjoying it and Jocko waa on hia hind legs aa solemn aud busy aa an 01. I snatched the gridiron away from him and took the kitten off before aha waa burned any eioept her fur, and when mother and Butao came down stairs, they oouldo't understand what It waa that had been burning, and guessed the oook must bave put egg shell on the lire. This ia all tha monkey baa done alnoa I got him day before yesterday, father has been away toy a week, but be ia oming back la a few days, and won't ha lie delighted when ha finds a monkey in tha houea F Vimmy Urown, in urjw'e Young '), Womxk ax MiNimi, There are many Vooa tiona at tha preeent time which were, at one pe riod in their history, almost exclusively monop olised by men, but are bow being opened to ail mit woman, who baa oompelled recognition by ber talent and ability. The ranks of tha theo logiana and physicians show many women who well maintain the position they bave eought and tenured. Beyond a speculation ia stocks, the business of mining has presented but few point of interest to the gentler aei. A oaae haa re eently oome under the Mining Brriru't observa tion which ia at least worthy of record. Mr. B. C. Clark, by the death of her husband, earn into poaeeeeioa of a number of mining claims, and In order to intelligently superintend their development and to gaia knowledge of the soieBo of mining, alia ha take a ooura of study ia Prof. Mardock'o ackool of aeaeylng and obemietry ia C'bioego, Thi lady baa aleo stud ied tha operation of machinery, smeltere and onshore, sod ia thoroughly Imbued with the spirit of mining. A woman, aa skllUd writer oa meUllnrgy aad mining, or a a superintend ent of mine, would be a new thing nader the mo. tfmda Tranteriit, Till rusiiLS cm Mr comc, ao often fatal before the daws, can often be relieved within aa boar with a milk emetic, and flannels, wrong ia boiling water, applied to the etomeob. 7 OXYGEN AS A CUIUTIVE AGENT. Ia oxygen a ourativ agent t The wonderful power which it poaeeseea of destroying oraanio matter, and the pumving etteot which alwaya results therefrom, haa led us, reasoning by anal ogy, to believe that many diaeaaea which are now regarded aa incurable, would succumb to the olauaing power of thia element The air oontaine only '.!0.0ll.1 of oxygen, the remaining 71) GUI parte being composed entirely of nitrogen, which aervea to dilute tha oxygen. The de pressing effect of s smaller amount of oxygen and inoreated amount of oarbonio acid ia felt when oue baa been for a short time ia a poorly ventilated room. In mountainous oountriee, where tha hlght above the aea level la not too great the refresh, ing elToct of tha air ia proverbial. This ia sim ply because the proportion of oxygen la greater and of oarbonio acid leas. The purifying effect of oxidation la atrikingly ahown In running brooks. Her water which la unlit to drink on auoount of orgenlo Impurities, beoomea pur by running a mile or two, Thia change ia due to tha fact that in tha act of flow ing each partiul of the water la brought Into oontacl with the air, and absorbs tha neceeeary amount of oxygen to oombiu with the orgauio matter, thue destroying it In many diaeaaea a "chang of air" ia recom mended aa a our, or at leaat aa a aooro of re lief, In it incipient atagea consumption may often be oured by vigorous examine la the open air, and by living wholly out of douM. The benellt derived from pur air aud exor cise is due entirely to the large amount of oxy gen which exeroie auchaa horseback riding enablee and oomiiele the patient to Inhale. Th organlo gorma of disease are thus oxidised and dnetroyed. W submit then, to the publlo fur considera tion, the question! Will not the breathing of pure oxygen lias prove to be tha solution to th problem, "llnw shall w treat consumption t" There la a well authenticated oaa la which a child wae oured of hydrophobia by Inhaling throe oubic ft of oxygen. In thia ease blood poisoning was the evil, and oxygen aeema to have combined with the poisonous principle, thereby doetrnyiiig it A young Frenchmen who haa recently been eiierimeiiling upon himself, Unite that be oan inhale oxygen without experiencing any ill ef fect. He took aa much aa MO liters a day for several days. The writer ha often Inhaled oxygen for experimental purposes, and It us waa never followed by any nnpteaaaut effect Haiti Journal of llntltk Mnihi'AL, Umm or Kiiiia For burn or soalda, nothing ia mure soothing than tha white of an 'XX. which may be ponred over the wound. It is softer, aa a varnish for a burn, than collodion, and being alwaya at band oan be applied Imme diately. It la aleo moreooollng than tha "sweet oil and onttoB," which was formerly supposed to be the surest application to allay tha smarting paia. It la the eootaot with the air whiuh give th extreme discomfort experienced from or dinary aooidenU of thia kindi and anything which exoludea air and prevent Inllaminatioa , ia tha thing to be at one applied. The egg la aleo considered one of the beet rented iee for dye entery. Beaton op slightly with or without sugar and swallowed, It temla by it emollant qualitiee to leeeen the Inflammation of the atom- aeh and Intoatinee, and by forming a transient oo ting oa tboee organ to enable nature to re sume her healthful sway over thedleeasij body. Two or at most three egg per day would be ell that la required In ordinary oaaeei and sine th egg ia sot merely medicine, bat food a well, the lighter th diet otherwiM, the quieter th pa tient I kept, th more oerUin and rapid la th recovery, How to Soma- Raxi-. Melt th reela, and while la a state of fusion add tar. Th proper degre of hardness oaa he asosrteined by drop ping a email portion of th melted mate lain water.