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About Jacksonville post. (Jacksonville, Or.) 1906-19?? | View Entire Issue (July 6, 1907)
JACKSONVILLE POST VOL. 1 Jacksonville Post P ublished A t J acksonville , O re gon , F or S eventeen R easons A nd H ollering A ll T he T ime F or I ts T own , I ts C ounty and I ts S tate APPLICATION HAS BEEN MADE TO ENTER THE POST AT THE JACKSON VILLE POSTOFFICE AS SECOND CLASS MATTER. OTHERWISE FIRST CLASS Sanders & Overholt Publishers & Proprietors S ubscription P rice $1.50 A Y ear I n T he U nited S tates , C anada A nd Y amhill C ounty . O regon W hen C onvenient S ubscriptions S hould B e P aid I n M oney : O ther wise M ortgages , M ines A nd M ules W ill B e A ccepted f ■ The first page of The Post has been conde- ‘■ce’! iinjr'.y given over to the junior editor— Miles O/erholt—who either has to have some place to display his literary spasms or be confined tc the violent ward. It is hoped that the readers and patrons of The Post wdl look at the matter in this 1 ght and not judge the senior (or saner) editor t >o harshly for a'lowing him this privilege. A Fast Town According to the Walla Wall a, Wash., Bulletin that town is increas ing in population faster than any town in the state. I went to Walla Wa'la once. You know’ the state penitentiary is located there. They couldn’t have found a better name, for it’s Wallow Wallow all the time at Walla Walla. It’s so muddy up there that a horse blanket would mire. The only way they can get up town from the depot is to follow a barb wire fence around the guard house at the pen. You see the guards have to have lots of sand. One day a fellow saw a hat apparently lying in the mud. He took a long stick and poked it, when a man underneath the hat said: "Here, you leave my hat alone.” Of course the fellow apol ogized andsaid: "You’rein pretty deep, aren’t you? ’ “Yes” said the man, “and a whole lot deeper than that. I've got a team and wagon underneath • :me,,yet.” Walla Walla is a fast town all right. It’s fast in the mud. They’ think every stranger that comes to town is a convict. I asked a fellow if he knew Teddy Roosevelt and he said: “No, I don't remember him. What was he sent up for!” The whole town reminds one of a penitentiary. One reason for that is, it is a big sell. Then, too, there are so ifiany people hanging around there. I went into a store and a big fellow Was bawlin’ "change.” And you can buy anything you want on time. They are so used to giving a fellow time there. I went to the Dacres Hotel at Walla Walla one night and the night turnkey said; "I’m sorry, but all our worst cells are full.” 1 told him 1 didn’t want a room that was half full; what I wanted was a room with a bed in it. So he called a guard who sent me up to a hole in the wall he called a room. Well, I went in, but couldn’t see a a place to lie down, sol asked, “Where is the bed?” and he said: "Over there by the match safe." And I thought it was a foot stool. Well, he went out and finally I tried to lie down, and the only way I could succeed at it was to go to bed on the installment plan. I'd NO. 4 JACKSONVILLE. JACKSON COUNTY’, OREGON, JULY 6, 1S07 first go to bed with my head and let my feet sit up. then I’d wake my head up and let r y feet sleep awhile. 1 don’t l i e tj lie in that kind of a bed. It's too crowded. Sort of a concen trated lie. If there ha 1 been any bed bugs, there wouldn't have been r. om enough for all of us. The Study of Mining The study of mining is a very fac- inating pastime. After the ardous duties of the day are over and the clock has been wound and the cat is locked in the cellar and the kindling cut for the morning fire end the children are in bed, then it gives me great pleasure to go to my massive bookshelf and take down the Bible and peruse fifteen or twenty of its pages. After 1 have learned a couple of chapters 1 then roll my plush, mahogany oak- finished, leather covered easy chair under the electric light and read, from Morrison's Mining Laws such mirth provoking and highly interesting bits of literature as the following: " ihe distinction which would relieve ,hese points would be to allrw the dip to such lodes only i s have a perpen dicular base and are not on the nature of stratagraphic.il deposits: All the inconsistencies apparent from the previous paragraph are the sequence to any other ruling.” Isn't that sublime, g) and, gloomy and peculiar! Note how the terse phrases are brougt out and with what delicateness ard finenes t e situation is explained. To the common plug such bits of wit ticism are entirely lost in the shuffle, but to one who has delved deep into the mining profession and knows all about such things it appeals with a strong current of emotion. My pet ambit'on is to get a mine, one that is gentle and kind, and exper iment on its stratigraphical deposit and its perpendicular base. I think 1 can invent something so that such superflui ties as those can be done away with en tirely. An article in last week's Mining Journal is headed “Good Words for the Prune," but having a regular boarding place, I skipped that and went right on reading. on my handsome but buste 1 remains. But seriously, how long are these thriving high ) rices going to last? What is going to bj the outcome? Formerly, it used to be the o’.octor.the law ver, the minister, the journalist who stood fairiy 1 igh in the social scale, who ,vue iooktd ub to as little tin gods in he cor.mur.iti s where they heldforth; out row it is the butcher, the baker, the .rocir, aid the Iry-goodsman who lead . he cotillions, are at the front in the grand marches, and use the bite pencil unre sisted. But it is on the newly-married couples .hat these prohibitive market prices mis-ter ned “good times,"fall the more heavily. A young couple just about to dare fate by renouncing single blessed ness have an idea that they won,t have to eat after they get married. They il ink they can live on a small bunch of violets s.t in the middle of the table and a cour le of kisses to wash them down; they fatuously believe, poor deluded th ligs, that a small piece of blue ribbon around a white throat, a box of caramels, a ha n r.o.k and a full, golden moon above them is the sine qua non of an average mairied lite —in fine, merely a continu ation of their “sparking" days. But we vid manivd jcople know different. H„w long will their honeymoon last when .1 ey ci c < blip cd to wait for the shadesof right to throw its mantle of darkness and secrecy around, so that they can Climb their neighbor’s fence and make a successful get-a-way of an armful of wood? What a dampertotheirconjugal bliss it will be when the “old man,” ■r.ore correctly speaking, the young hus band. is obliged to shin up trees to hunt for ti ds' eggs in lieu of the noble hens' eggs. Ard, particularly, when the joy ous j oung couple is reduced to such straits that they have to hang a yellow card with the appalling sign “Diph theria In Here: Keep Out!” on their front gete to scare away the ubiquitous bill-collector. Young man. young woman, if you must get mairied, it your hearts yearn for double blessedness and will not be denied, don’t mar ry a bum doctor, an out at-the- heels lawyer, a seedy editor, or a shiny coated minister; don t make the fatal mistake these days of sky-high prices. But get next to a fat butcher, a red faced grocer,a bilious clothing merchant, or even a villainous plumber, and your days will be long upon the land, your nights full of pleasant dreams, your hearts full of gladsome songs, and, which is more vital than all the rest put together, your hungry little tum-tums will be full to repletion of the fat of the land. All railroad accidents occuring on the Harriman lines of the Oregon and Washington division will be made public together with the findings of the railroad board of inquiry as soon as pos sible after the incident, according to the decision reached by General Man ager J, P. O'Brien. Journal. Now we will know what powerful mo After the Fourth tive lies behind the idea of bringing When in the morning early the bed trainsin on time from the California stead rears and walks. side. And the dresser in the coiner to the chairs begin to talkf High Prices When a man's suspendéis stretch them selves and waltz around the room, Prices on everything are.soaring sky ward ata rapid rate. Living expenses When giant fire crackers begin to bang and boom; have advanced at least twenty per cent within the last two years. —News Item. When turkey tracks fly in the door and flit around the bed. It is a sad thing to see small children gnawing the bark off the poplar, cork elm And little devils with a pick begin to pound your head; and other trees in the back yard; a feeling of tender, irresistable sympathy surges When elephants without their trunks come running up the stair. up in the breast of the writer to see peo ple eating the birds off the hats of the And an oyster climbs upon the shelf and tries to comb his hair; ladies of the household. The features of this article have been lying dorman^ When you feel your pockets en p;y and your mouth is full of taste. in my vocal chords for mo nths and must come out or a coroner will soon be sitting When just to think is troublesome and life a b irren waste; When the celebration’s over and you'd like to have a drink. Then it’s time to go behind the ba: n and have a quiet think. Harriman’s System E. H. Harriman maybe a vicious an I bad man, bat the O. R. & N. railroal suits ma. I’ve baen rail rods lots of times but I’d rather walk over the O. R. & N. line than ride the brake beam •> of any railroad I know of. The O. R. & N. is the pride of Mr. Harriman. He lives for it. He breathes for it. In fact it is a part of his system. I walked into Pendleton. Oregon one evening just for a stroll, mind you, from Boise, Idaho. I’d been up to Boise to see my girl. Her name is Ida. H ar father was a gardner, so I use! to sit down among her rutabages and peas and watch Ida hoe. That was an industrious garden, too. Many a time I’ve seen that garden patch and fence. Well, as I said before, I arrived at Pendleton. And I was so sleepy that the people thought I was a resident so I went oat of town a short distance and took a nap on the O. R. & N’s road bed. The air is so heavy arojnd Pendleton that I had to burn up a wagon load of railroad ties to keep it light. It makes m? lonesome to think of those times. I can’t forget the old ties. Well, I chartered a private car at Pendleton, the kind with a side entrance. That’s thefirsttime I eve- rode on a rail. The car was full of steel rails and every time the train would stop my head would strike the ceiling and I would come down almost hard enough to split a rail. I began to think I was Abraham Lincoln. Whenever the train would stop it would jar the cars back to the station we just left, and the only way I could make any headway was to face the rear end of the train and let it jolt me the other way. That train jolted me so much I nearly sprained my mind. I had a $2 bill in my pocket, but when I reached Portland it was all jolted into nickels and dimes. And it rained all night. The only way I could keep dry was to get thirsty. When 1 landed in Portland I didn't have enough money to buy the hole in a link of sausage. If postage stamps has been retailing for two cents a dozen, I couldn’t stand on a corner and watch ’em bring up the mail. A Touching Story In a country graveyard a plain white board stood at the head of a little mound of clay, and on it was engraved the touching epitaph, “Little Willie, aged eleven, Now is resting safe in heaven.” A tramp, passing by, observed the silent headboard and drawing a grimy pencil from this ragged vest pocket, inscribed below: “You can’t mist always sometimes tell, Maybe Willie went to h .” William Nannary, Pau) Waddel, Frank Robinson, Moxie Smith, Charles Dunford Jr. and Lewis Ulrich went fishing last Sunday with good results. It is claimed that Waddel traded a quart of whiskey (they had some along) for twenty-eight trout, but Paul refutes that statement. He says he wouldn’t trade a quart of whiskey for a mar,- eating shark.
