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About Independence monitor. (Independence, Or.) 1912-19?? | View Entire Issue (Aug. 11, 1916)
( INDEPEN MONITOR "THE PAPER THAT EVERYBODY READS" VOL. 4 INDEPENDENCE, POLK COUNTY, OREGON, FRIDAY, AUGUST 11, 1916 NO. 52 DENCE THE RHYMING SUMMARIST The Baptist week sure's been great, We give them now a great hurrah, Better join their yelling crew, Rock Salt! " ! Zip! Boom! Bah! Boys and girls of pep and vim Who mind their father and the maw, We wish them well, So we yell: T. E. C. Rah! Rah! Rah! ! The bridge builders had a strike, And most of us are wishing For several, half a hundred strikes When we take a day at fishing; The medicine show has gone away, But left plenty for the failing, Enough we note To lloat a boat For the whole blame town was ailing. There is no reason why one should die, These earthly ties to sever, Why not keep the show right here And all live on forever; A certain girl called this week, My, its really shocking, She said, "Hey! You may say, There's a jigger in my stocking.'' 1 A yell, even if it oe it religious one, (Juts a t jiggio with this style of rhyme and we leel a bad about it aa you do. 3APTISTS DEDICATE ! OBJECT TO PAYMENT Brother Gard ft (3 He Tells How io Tat a Watermelon i 4 1IIEN bunlness at the Lime KUn club was over Brother Gardner, president, arose and said: "My freiidls, Ua witteiuilijun belongs to ie cull'd people Minie as de possum an' lie persimmon. T.'atur' made "em for I im. 1 le,:an eatlii' wuteruiillyun when I was only throe y iirs old, an" I had cuddled up to him every y ur slu-e. 1 lias followed I an from Lis cradle M his tfrave, au' dar ara only one way to git de best i:f of him "You Wi" lookin' rouu' you pretty airly in May. You devote yon;- Suiv'.ay arternoons to walkin' out in the kentry. You saunter roun' tiH"you c-ntvli m.-Ik of what am to be a millyun patch. You mark dat spot down In your note book. If you tre any duwgs roun' de hoijxe mark them down also "Each Sunday arteruoon Baunter out dat way. By an' by you will noli o dat de; vines have cutu up aD' begun to iruwl. In a few woe!: mo' wu.er Diillyuns will begin to appear on de vines. lar will lw? a wbopplu llu' one d.it will cotch your eye. Neber mind de rest, but keep your eye on dat bis ne. Note down how fur it Is from de fence an' how much lime It will luke to sneak obcr dat fence, grab up dat millyun an' git back acaln when de proper timo arrives. "You way have to go out dar six or elfiht times, but it will not be time tUrowed away. De millyun Is now ripe down to de core. Ie great nlglrt cun.s at last A black man wid com mon sense selects a night widout a moon, an' lie walks most of de dls-tan- e on tiptoes. "Yon arrive at de spot, you put your two hands on de top rail of de fence, an' you go oler like a shudder. You go crouchin' along till you am beside dat big tulllyun. len you reach out an' softly break it loose from Its vine, an' you are buck Bg'in an' ober de fense befo' any one could count twen ty. You has brought a Back along. A cull'd man wid o sack on his Bboulder mar or mav not be stopped, 'but a Jv'; The dedicatory services at the T.aptist church have been attended bv a large crowd at each meeting and each program Ikis been carried out as an nounced. From the ofiieBal dedicatory ceremony on Suru- day night, until last night, there has not been a moment in which interest lagged, enthusiasm waned, or the Baptists did not feci proud of the accomplish ments cf their church. Other than its roll of "old heads" and a lustling and ctrenuous young preacher, the Tuesday Evening Club, consisting of about sixty yo:'ng people, forms a most val uable adjunct to the church Tuesday evening was "Young Polks Night," and it made one yoang to be there. After lis-tc-i in; to one of the most inter esting addresses ever delivered in Independence by Airs. I Burton, of Corvallis, state pres ident of the 13. Y. P. U., a gen eral invitation was extended to the entire audience to visit the basement, which Is the Club's dca and home. The room was tastily decorated and made a very pretty picture. Before re fieshments were served, Miss Oissie Bramburg, president gve a history of the club from the time of its beginning to the p:esciit, its purposes and its fl nancial success. Miss Brani- U.ag'.-i personality has been an ai portant taetor in the up building and the upkeep of the Club. Tonight is "Church Member's N.ght," and alter the service a reception will be held in the a;nuul Sunday school and ci.ureh picnic, which will be in. id at Greenwood. A great tiiue is expected. Sunday nijrning, the pastor, Rev. W. S. iiiewart, will preach at the us ual hour. In the evening the concluding number, Prof J Suerman Wallace, member of the McAlinnvillo College facul ty, will deliver a gospel sermon, w.sicii will be followed by the j dedication of the baptistry and believer's baptism will be ad-n.iniisiered. "You Go Crouchin' Along' cull'd man wid a great big watermlllyun hung lovingly to his breast am shore to be. ' "Y'our heart am beatln' like a drum as you head fur your cabin, but I'rovi deme is wid you. She brings you safe home. Your wife and liiU'cn am in bed an' asleep, an' dar am no one to Interfere wid you when you dli a hole in de back yard an" lower dat millyun inter his grave an' kiver him up. I'e coolness of de air will cool dat fruit 'nu(T. When it am cooled wid Ice It looses half its Bavor. "All next day you go roun' In antiiipasliun. Your mouf waters as you think of de feast ready fur you. Arter supper you renurk dat you re Lon you will go out an' talk politics fur awhile. You go. You stay out until you know dat de fam'ly has gone to bed. Ien you return home on' unkiver dat watermlllyun. He am de same glorious millyun. lie am lifted out o' his grave an' keerfully deposited on de back doah steps. Ieu you take a seat be side him an' produce your Ja. kknlfe "Don't be In a hurry. I.lck yc-ur chops fur awhile. By au' by, when 1 you feel dat If you wait a uilnute longer your susneu iers am gwlne to bust 1 plunge In de blade o' your knife at-about de center o' de millyun ari' brlnjr T It roun' to complete de circle. IK cracklln' noie wM w hi h de milium fall Q Inter two ekal parts sendi a glorious shiver up your spine an' down your lalgs. Ie feast am befo' you red. ripe. Juicy and de let fixlder in do world fur a black ninn. "You has prm'ded yourself wid two ounces of ghevr. divide It an' prtnkie it on an' let It git two minutes de start o' jou "Den you are ready to commen' e devourln'. I'::t your ri -lit I an ! Into de right hit' 1 half and tear out a chunk of de red cn-e I'cri 'o de ame wid your left hand. You has no spoon or plate Wur !::i' er tin wd 'nnff. Take a bile from de riht hand chunk an' den frvn i!c -fi Never mina ir you ai swni.er a tew seeas or u ae jui e in : u-. n mi runs Into your shoes. It rany take you an hour to devour dat core, but It will lie an hour o' slcb aatlsfacshun as a human beiu' seMum funis on this airth """.'Iieu you has finished at last cut dem rinds into bits an' heap eiu up In one glorious pile. You have sati-flc l your butter, l ot dar ani do fam'ly lo cur.i. You are sleepin' next lunwiiln' w ! ( :i s reams o' delight awake jnn. I'e wife an' de bill'cn have diskeeveW drit mound of wa terr.il! 'vim rind: an' dey baa set down fur a feast. Ik-y de- o::r an eaL an' by an' by dsr am r mo' rinds left. A'.l h '.vt- j ( ri- jcI. im,' all. an' dnr!:.g de re.t o' de day you go 'bout wid a i .k of iruaipj u:t your face." M gl All C -pjr.-iKbt. lT.l MoClur Nwiixr By .,; Ml HOP NOTES A leport has gained circulat ic l that hop picking in the In d pe.jicnte section will not be gi:i until the middle of Septem ber. There is nothing in the geneial condition of the vines t(. indicate that the picking season will be delayed for any such length of time, A period or hot weather for the remain ch r tii the month would "bring n.jst of the yards into picking e,ndiiion before September 1. S Ta. ing is general this week. !t is : ot thought that there will m ;ch t ' a siioituge in plck-t;.-i t.' is year. Representatives a", the government labor bureau w re here last week, conferring with growers u.id declare they w;:i b) able to place a number of workers, if required. Vam hill county has decreas e ! its hofi acreage this year, a- -.nlii.g to the News-Reporter, saying that 212 acrt within a radiiirt of five miles of Mc :i:.avil!e have been taken out, a:.d also that a number of grow ers around Dayton, Wheatland, and Ballston have plowed up their yards. DINNER FOR G. A. R. '! he W. R. C. will give a din-, n lo ttie old soldiers and their ilies at noon, on Saturday, r, 1 Aiu'urit Unh. The prospect of paving North Main street by the state, conn ty, and city has run into difficul ty. Soine of the property own ers along the proposed highway within the city limits, after re ceiving notice of a levy of $G per lot. have concluded that it will infringe upon their rights in thv; line question now pend ing in the su'eme court, and say they will refuse to pay the aiiiie, A i lilure to pay this assess ment will prevent the paving of t!:e highway within the city lim its and an opportunity missed that n?ay never again be given, the paving of the road can be ommeneed at the city limits, caving a dirt road for several blocks on North Main street, iomothiii that the general vjblic will greatly regret and it s fincerely hoped that the prop ;;ty owners will find a way to iny the assessment and the work be done as proposed. MONEY IN LOGANS V. A I.awtnn has returned to '.dependence this week from ho loganberry farm of 1 truce Cunningham, three miles couth )f Salem, where he has been o;r. ployed a s foreman since luiio 20th. Mr. Cunningham has 45 acres )C loganberries and considering that it is the first crop, the yield ias been good and the finan cial returns large. Mr. Cun liiigham's neighbors laughed at aim whan ho went into the lo ganberry growing on such a nrge scale, but they laugh no aiore. lie has demonstrated :hat this industry is the most profitable one in the Willamette .valley and the growing demand and popularity of loganberry juice is going to make it still more profitable. Mr. Cun ningham's crop this year will gross him at ler.Lt $300 per acre. A loganberry vineyard resein bk s a hop yard in many respects .11 d requires as much care and a: icntion. A RAILROAD OPPORTUNITY Newport has raised a "rge bonm? to be given for the con struction of a railroad from Newport to Portland, via the Si let i to Sheridan to Tort land. A better and shorter route would be to connect with the V. & S. near lloskins, saving many miles of construction, ai.d connecting with the S. F.I land (.). E. at Independence if not desired to build on into Fort land. This appears to be a project that both the commercial in terests of Newport and Indepen dence should investigate and ascertain if it would not be more easy to obtain than the longer coast route. THE ROAD KOG It is an unwrtten law of the r;au tnat two ve nicies ap- inoachlng each other along the it ute.' of the rorul shall give way equally, both keeping suf ficiently to the right to allow c; easy ana uate passage. 1 acre are many men among; the auto mobile fraternity who hog the ; enter of the road; Usually :l.ese men nissess heavy cars, i;:d are not especially worried U.out the reoults of a smash e ith a lighter car. Every day :e hear about road hogs, swine l hat rush the ir rars straight uwn the middle of the road, giving way not an inch when u's approach from the oppos ite direction. The cautious man, .ile mindful of his rights in ti.e matter, will not dispute the road "with the fool who risks the lins of many people need lessly. And it is knowledge ti at the average man will not t:.ke chances in forcing the hog to hU proper place that gives .e hog the inspiration to play Editor Monitor: That piece you had in the paper about au tomobiles im the public road was good. Most of the auto mobile driwra are very accom odating, especially those 'who live here, and recognize that the farmer driving the old hoss Ina equal righto and Is willing to give (hem. Some of the "Hlue Hellies" from Portland, who have nothing to do but run around the country, don't think tl.at anybody but themselves has any rights and they look with the same contempt upon a farmer as tlp?y do on a Ford. hen I get rich enough I am going to build an armored au tomobile and run it on the roads Sundays hoping to meet ail the road hogs in Oregon. "Farmer Hill." his fool game. It will require a few casualties on our high ways to bring the necessity for action before the public Stan dard Oil llulletin. POLITICAL VOMIT WORKMEN STRIKE Men employed on the Main stieet bridge btruck luesuay and no work was done that day and Wednesday. The ex act nature of the grievance could be ascertained. Part of Tobin & Steven's con tracting outfit has been moved to the right-of-way of the V. & S., where work will be com ed at once on the railroad grading. TWO DAYS PARTY r.lesdames G. W. Conkey, W. II. Walker, and O. V. Uutier, eniertaineu on weunesuay anu Thursday afternoons of this week, and an account or the t,i 1 .1 !..(.. same win appear in me m-;icij di l ai tnient next week. This from a Portland Itepub- This from a Portland Derno- liean paper: cratic paper: Sheridan, Or., Aur. 4-C. C. Sheridan, Or., Aug. 41. T. L:)we, of Dallas, believing that patrlquin, fearing that Hughes hughes will be elected and wJn be c,pcted and that thig wl1 il at this will result in the re- l turn of prosperity, has pur- 1,fi,lIt 1,1 1,ard t,ine8' ha 80,d ceased a 130-acre farm from I. his 130-acre farm to C. C. Lowe 1. Patriquin, here, for $13,000. here, for $13,000. CAN YOU BEAT IT? Linn county has decided to City News, worry along without a school t fa , Pok Bmalier ipervisor and give the county superintendent a chance to ex- - . I-1 rid a little, thus Having the and better roads, we must have taxpayers $3,000 a year. Falls a supervisor. Can you beat It? f i o Q i;i:in nr.sT visit TO THE FARM 9 & IIP I -A- X I I B mm fl.l M' ; 'diK l-iiwi.l iii.i'tv;' Giving Him Confidence 6 win hi flriit ranipnign, bin firnt political ipeech, even. Aitnougn tini couniy conitiuiiev nan teni him into a rural dintrict to try out hii oratorical wings, hn wn eneouratri'd hy the warm welcome of the local committee and the elaborate preparation for the meeting that wore evident on all hiih'a. There wa even a burnt that tilnved on tin- stand in the nublic paare for half an hour In-fore the spe-ch. KinHllv the great moment arrived. Tliu chairman htqipod to tfio platform rail and addressed tli crowd. "Follow citizens," ho paid, "we nave with u today young man who in destined to make his murk in the rank of our party. He cornea to tell us of the burning iaauoa that confront ua, and his fame a an orator haa preceded him. IIo will now address you, arul whrn ho haa finiahed the band will call you together again." Youth'i Com panion. . OO-O 3 j? Not In That Class 3 m A'I.EVEI-ANI TDiinn womiiii tun a ten-year-old brother w ho In win trouit tin yenr and la llkeljr to crop out la new la e at tlie muHt unexpeeted tlmei. Tba otbar nl-lit tlio anxlouM aiiltur called uu bU Inamorata, arrtTtng at lier douiMie a little lfore lie wa eipwted. Bbe wii not readv to initko l.er npiH-aruii' e, and Uie duty of entartalnlng the i uller UeTolv-d uii tba little brother. Well, Hobby," besan tbe yuuint uun In aa effort to make converfcullou and at the aaine lime to put tiU Involuntary bost at bU ea, "doe your ulnler tbluk tbat I am calling at tbU botiae oftener than I am we'ome?" Tbe ehlld looked kw-nly at tbo caller. "Nothing- doing," be aald. 'lo jou tblnk I'm one of tbene freb kl"U you read about In the funny iaiein? Tbero ain't going to le no etubarraaalng anwer tbU time." 'levelaud I'laln Ixnler. A perusal of the Monitor's news columns would indicate that the greatest need of Independence at the present hour is a hospital.