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About Oregon daily emerald. (Eugene, Or.) 1920-2012 | View Entire Issue (May 7, 2004)
“Webster's New World College Dictionary” de fines a cohabitant as a “person living together with another or others.” Often, living together is seen as the “next step” for some couples. Sophomore Malia Bennett said living together with her longtime boyfriend was hard in the beginning. "We were together all of the time," she said. "It was a learn ing experience that I value. We learned from our mistakes. It is important to have separate lives as well as one together." Bennett and her boyfriend took some time apart from their living situation and briefly separated. "I think one of the reasons we did break up is because we were not living together," she said. "The influence by friends is so intense, especially in these developmental years." Bennett added that the two learned to communicate to Some couples take the "next step" by moving in together By Michelle Golden • Freelance Reporter work out problems more effectively. "That is one of the reasons we are doing so well today," she said. Not all have a positive experience when they live with a significant other. Junior Emily Birkland said her live-in experience had some unpleasant effects on her relationship as well as her life. "Living together you really get to know an individual," Birkland said. "In some ways it really made me like my boyfriend more, but adversely at times I really felt as though I did not have enough alone time because we spent all of our time together." Many couples fault a lack of space as a main pitfall to of a live-in relationship, sometimes feeling the need to suppress their feelings to avoid an unmanageable situ ation, which can be un healthy for the relationship and the individual. "When I lived with my boyfriend, I would try to avoid a fight by bottling up my feel ings, which eventually ended with an even bigger unneces sary dispute," Birkland said. Birkland said because she and her partner are no longer living together, they have be come closer and more recep tive to each other's feelings. "Because we spend less time together, we are more eager to see each other," she said. In some cases, finances play a significant role in the deci sion to live with a partner. "We both paid rent and had our own separate places, which cost a lot" Bennett said. "It just didn't seem logical financially because we were sleeping at each other's houses every night." Despite potential difficul ties, the number of unmarried couples living together is in creasing. The numbers have risen steadily from 439,000 in 1960 to 5.5 million in 2000, according to the U.S. Census Bureau. Michelle Golden is a freelance reporter for the Emerald. 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Laundry rooms Riley.1st floor kitchen area & parking tot Hamilton.• Behind Burgess & Spiller Bean.Outside Willcox & Caswell Earl.Outside Young & McClure Carson.Basement by elevator Walton.Outside DeCou, Adams, McAlister & Smith Donate Reusable Items June 7th-11th in all hall lobbies! ACCEPTED MATERIALS * Paper * Cardboard * Newspaper * Bottles & Cans Family Housing & University Apts RECYCLE near all dumpster sites. DONATE reusable items to your nearest non-profit organization. For motor oil, batteries, and other hazardous materials, contact Lane Co. Waste Management @ 687-4119. Campus Offices To arrange office clean-outs, call 346-5275! >. For more information contact Campus Recycling @ 346-0929. “ recycle-recycle- recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle recycle« Working from Home Resident assistants get a lot more than free food or rent for payment—they also learn leadership skills By Joseph Robert Boyd Freelance Reporter On a typical Thursday, junior psychology ma jor Mary Geisler will wake up at 7:30 a.m., attend classes from 8:30 a.m. to 2 p.m., grab lunch, participate in staff meetings from 5:30 p.m. to 7:30 p.m., and make her nightly rounds at 10 p.m., mid night and 2 a.m. Geisler is a second-year resi dent assistant for Watson Hall in Hamilton Complex. As spring term comes to a close and students start making plans to move out, resident as sistants are trying to move back in— this time on the University's dime. "I had an amazing time my first year as an RA, both with the residents and the staff," Geisler said. "It gives me more of a focus, whereas now I have learned to sit down and priori tize. Staying busy keeps me on top of things, and I have learned a lot about planning and time management." Geisler became interested in being an RA after working with her hall's government two years ago. She applied af ter an assistant complex direc tor convinced her that being an RA would expand her lead ership skills. "An RA needs to work well as a group member," Geisler said. "Working with 80 resi dents can be challenging, and at times it is difficult getting a large staff to be all on the same page. You need to be able to work well as a group member, take initiative, yet still know how to follow." According to Geisler, an RA has to play many roles. An RA may have to act as a "surrogate older sibling," a mediator, a shoulder to cry on, a person to vent frustrations at, and most importantly, a knowledgeable academic and safety resource. "The other day, there was a guy here who lost his wallet for like a week," Geisler said. "He canceled all of his credit cards and everything, and it turned out that someone had found it and left a message on his room phone, but his roommate had erased it. I had to find the phone number of a woman who is one of the heads of Hamilton and sure enough, she had it. It seems like random things like that always come up." Geisler said an RA has to be able to balance school, work and the rest of life; however, the most important quality an RA needs to have is patience. "I feel like I have the ability to bring people together," jun ior resident assistant Shamim Matin said. "I can help people come together who normally wouldn't socialize with each other initially. After they got to know each other, I could kind of leave and they would stick together." Matin, an exercise and movement science major, is one of more than 200 stu dents who showed interest in becoming a resident assistant this spring. The applicants were whittled down to 50 af ter a selection process that in cluded a series of written es says and interviews. In the next week, 30 of the 50 stu dents will be selected as RAs for next year. The resident as sistants attend a one-credit leadership class once a week in the spring. During the leadership class, students participate in team building exercises such as con structing something out of Le gos, allowing each individual to touch only one color. "I would recommend to any freshman who is having fun in the dorms to try and become an RA," Matin said. "With the free food and living, it is not a bad idea at all." For students interested in free food and housing, but not the large-scale commitment of being an RA, becoming a Resi dential First Year Interest Group academic assistant is an alternative. Students enrolled in a resi dential FIG live in the same housing complex as their class mates and FIG adviser. Accord ing to the residential FIG Web site, FIG advisers "are advanced undergraduate student men tors who live in the hall and are available to help form study groups, bring speakers into the hall, help with pre-registration advising and help direct stu dents to campus resources. The FA helps support the RA to cre ate a great living space." Senior international studies and religious studies major Cameron Levin is the Cultural Patterns in the Middle East FIG adviser. As an FA, she shoulders some of the same responsibili ties as a normal RA. However, she said she is around mostly for academic help, grading and proofreading papers. "The Residential FIG pro gram is a wonderful thing that UO has started and that other universities are beginning to adopt," Levin said. "Being an FA has given me teaching ex perience, a chance to work with top professors and meet many new students. I would recommend it to anyone who is thinking of teaching as a ca reer path." Joseph Robert Boyd is a freelance reporter for the Emerald. We've got V ^ atwww.dailvemerald.com
