“Webster's New World College Dictionary” de
fines a cohabitant as a “person living together
with another or others.” Often, living together
is seen as the “next step” for some couples.
Sophomore Malia Bennett
said living together with her
longtime boyfriend was hard
in the beginning.
"We were together all of the
time," she said. "It was a learn
ing experience that I value. We
learned from our mistakes. It is
important to have separate
lives as well as one together."
Bennett and her boyfriend
took some time apart from
their living situation and
briefly separated.
"I think one of the reasons
we did break up is because we
were not living together," she
said. "The influence by friends
is so intense, especially in these
developmental years."
Bennett added that the two
learned to communicate to
Some couples take the "next step" by moving in together
By Michelle Golden • Freelance Reporter
work out problems more
effectively.
"That is one of the reasons
we are doing so well today,"
she said.
Not all have a positive
experience when they live with
a significant other.
Junior Emily Birkland said
her live-in experience had
some unpleasant effects on her
relationship as well as her life.
"Living together you really
get to know an individual,"
Birkland said. "In some ways it
really made me like my
boyfriend more, but adversely
at times I really felt as though I
did not have enough alone
time because we spent all of
our time together."
Many couples fault a lack
of space as a main pitfall to
of a live-in relationship,
sometimes feeling the need
to suppress their feelings to
avoid an unmanageable situ
ation, which can be un
healthy for the relationship
and the individual.
"When I lived with my
boyfriend, I would try to avoid
a fight by bottling up my feel
ings, which eventually ended
with an even bigger unneces
sary dispute," Birkland said.
Birkland said because she
and her partner are no longer
living together, they have be
come closer and more recep
tive to each other's feelings.
"Because we spend less time
together, we are more eager to
see each other," she said.
In some cases, finances play
a significant role in the deci
sion to live with a partner.
"We both paid rent and had
our own separate places, which
cost a lot" Bennett said. "It just
didn't seem logical financially
because we were sleeping at
each other's houses every
night."
Despite potential difficul
ties, the number of unmarried
couples living together is in
creasing. The numbers have
risen steadily from 439,000 in
1960 to 5.5 million in 2000,
according to the U.S. Census
Bureau.
Michelle Golden is a freelance
reporter for the Emerald.
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University of Oregon
RECYCLE GUIDE
PLAN AHEAD! Recycle and Donate!
Recycling ^er Education
Residence Hall
Recycling
Barnhart. Laundry rooms
Riley.1st floor kitchen area & parking tot
Hamilton.• Behind Burgess & Spiller
Bean.Outside Willcox & Caswell
Earl.Outside Young & McClure
Carson.Basement by elevator
Walton.Outside DeCou, Adams,
McAlister & Smith
Donate Reusable Items
June 7th-11th in all hall lobbies!
ACCEPTED MATERIALS
* Paper
* Cardboard
* Newspaper
* Bottles & Cans
Family Housing &
University Apts
RECYCLE near all dumpster sites.
DONATE reusable items to your
nearest non-profit organization.
For motor oil, batteries, and other hazardous materials,
contact Lane Co. Waste Management @ 687-4119.
Campus Offices
To arrange office clean-outs,
call 346-5275!
>. For more information contact Campus Recycling @ 346-0929.
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Working
from
Home
Resident assistants get a lot
more than free food or rent
for payment—they also
learn leadership skills
By Joseph Robert Boyd
Freelance Reporter
On a typical Thursday,
junior psychology ma
jor Mary Geisler will
wake up at 7:30 a.m., attend
classes from 8:30 a.m. to 2
p.m., grab lunch, participate in
staff meetings from 5:30 p.m.
to 7:30 p.m., and make her
nightly rounds at 10 p.m., mid
night and 2 a.m.
Geisler is a second-year resi
dent assistant for Watson Hall
in Hamilton Complex. As
spring term comes to a close
and students start making
plans to move out, resident as
sistants are trying to move
back in— this time on the
University's dime.
"I had an amazing time my
first year as an RA, both with
the residents and the staff,"
Geisler said. "It gives me more
of a focus, whereas now I have
learned to sit down and priori
tize. Staying busy keeps me on
top of things, and I have
learned a lot about planning
and time management."
Geisler became interested
in being an RA after working
with her hall's government
two years ago. She applied af
ter an assistant complex direc
tor convinced her that being
an RA would expand her lead
ership skills.
"An RA needs to work well
as a group member," Geisler
said. "Working with 80 resi
dents can be challenging, and
at times it is difficult getting a
large staff to be all on the
same page. You need to be
able to work well as a group
member, take initiative, yet
still know how to follow."
According to Geisler, an RA
has to play many roles. An RA
may have to act as a "surrogate
older sibling," a mediator, a
shoulder to cry on, a person to
vent frustrations at, and most
importantly, a knowledgeable
academic and safety resource.
"The other day, there was a
guy here who lost his wallet
for like a week," Geisler said.
"He canceled all of his credit
cards and everything, and it
turned out that someone had
found it and left a message on
his room phone, but his
roommate had erased it. I had
to find the phone number of a
woman who is one of the
heads of Hamilton and sure
enough, she had it. It seems
like random things like that
always come up."
Geisler said an RA has to be
able to balance school, work
and the rest of life; however,
the most important quality an
RA needs to have is patience.
"I feel like I have the ability
to bring people together," jun
ior resident assistant Shamim
Matin said. "I can help people
come together who normally
wouldn't socialize with each
other initially. After they got
to know each other, I could
kind of leave and they would
stick together."
Matin, an exercise and
movement science major, is
one of more than 200 stu
dents who showed interest in
becoming a resident assistant
this spring. The applicants
were whittled down to 50 af
ter a selection process that in
cluded a series of written es
says and interviews. In the
next week, 30 of the 50 stu
dents will be selected as RAs
for next year. The resident as
sistants attend a one-credit
leadership class once a week
in the spring.
During the leadership class,
students participate in team
building exercises such as con
structing something out of Le
gos, allowing each individual
to touch only one color.
"I would recommend to any
freshman who is having fun in
the dorms to try and become
an RA," Matin said. "With the
free food and living, it is not a
bad idea at all."
For students interested in
free food and housing, but not
the large-scale commitment of
being an RA, becoming a Resi
dential First Year Interest
Group academic assistant is
an alternative.
Students enrolled in a resi
dential FIG live in the same
housing complex as their class
mates and FIG adviser. Accord
ing to the residential FIG Web
site, FIG advisers "are advanced
undergraduate student men
tors who live in the hall and are
available to help form study
groups, bring speakers into the
hall, help with pre-registration
advising and help direct stu
dents to campus resources. The
FA helps support the RA to cre
ate a great living space."
Senior international studies
and religious studies major
Cameron Levin is the Cultural
Patterns in the Middle East FIG
adviser. As an FA, she shoulders
some of the same responsibili
ties as a normal RA. However,
she said she is around mostly
for academic help, grading and
proofreading papers.
"The Residential FIG pro
gram is a wonderful thing that
UO has started and that other
universities are beginning to
adopt," Levin said. "Being an
FA has given me teaching ex
perience, a chance to work
with top professors and meet
many new students. I would
recommend it to anyone who
is thinking of teaching as a ca
reer path."
Joseph Robert Boyd is a
freelance
reporter for the Emerald.
We've got
V ^ atwww.dailvemerald.com