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Newsroom: (541) 346-5511 Suite 300, Erb Memorial Union P.O. Box 3159, Eugene, OR 97403 E-mail: editor@dailyemerald.com Online: www.dailyemerald.com Wednesday, May 5,2004 Oregon Daily Emerald COMMENTARY Editor in Chief: Brad Schmidt Managing Editor: Jan Tobias Montry Editorial Editor: Travis Willse EDITORIAL. A noble line: Reel squirrel fishing in as Club sport "A squirrel leaping from bough to bough, and making the ivood but one wide tree for his pleasure, fills the eye not less than a lion, is beautiful, self-sufficing, and stands then and therefor nature." — Ralph Waldo Emerson From time to time, a new phenomenon is so culturally significant, so attuned to the contemporary American ethos, that anyone exposed to it recognizes instantly the dramatic social potential it offers. Gutenburg's generation saw the printing press; Ford's generation had the automo bile; and our brave new world has, of course, squirrel fish ing. The gist of this adventurous sport is this: The "fisher man," wielding a fly fishing rod, attaches a peanut to the end of the line and casts the bait to attract the rodents. Once an attracted squirrel has latched on to the nut, the sportsman tugs on to the line until the squirrel snatches or releases the peanut. Clearly, squirrel fishing ranks among the most noble natural pastimes, a tradition that will without a doubt long outlive anyone reading this warm but ultimately insuffi cient tribute. Squirrel fishing, then, transcends mere sporthood; it is, in its own right, a modem spiritual enterprise. In what can be described best as a subtle but powerful dance between human and squirrel, the endeavor exemplifies man's inti mate commune with nature. And our furry campus is particularly suited for the con sideration of this bold, new phenomenon. Even those out side the community recognize the school's long-standing tradition of human-squirrel symbiosis. Jon's World o' Squirrels, a Web site (http://www.gottshall.com/squirrels/) created by rodent enthusiast Jonathan Gottshall that offers squirrel-related resources, rated the University campus four squirrels (out of five) for squirrel friendliness. A new breed of cultural protectors has emerged on this campus: A group of students seeking to make squirrel fish ing an official Club sport. Responses have been mixed. "The reactions we get around campus are usually really enthusiastic or really upset," explained Jason Mcllhaney, the club's co-president. The five-seat Club sports executive committee has de layed, for now, sanctioning squirrel fishing as a Club sport, citing potential ethical concerns. "I just want to make sure that we're not doing anything offensive to the squirrels," committee member Lauren Anas said. But surely the activity represents quite the opposite, that is, an elevation of both squirrel and human as partners in a mutually beneficial arrangement: Squirrels sate themselves on delicious peanuts, while humans can take a brief re prieve from the bustle of the modem world and immerse themselves in a long-standing — and intensely personal — natural tradition. Better yet, about 30 students are already involved in the club, some three times the number required to form a Club sport. For the enhancement of University's culture and spiritu al health, the Emerald Editorial Board heartily encourages the Club sports executive committee to add squirrel fish ing to the University's fine roster of Club sports activities. EDITORIAL BOARD Brad Schmidt Editor in Chief Jan Tobias Montry Managing Editor Travis Willse Editorial Editor Jennifer Sudick Freelance Editor Ayisha Yahya News Editor Bur WHKT THE GOVeRHrtERT PUT To U0> mo THOSE TKOOrS OVER THERE WJ THE HRST PU<£? Steve Baggs Illustrator DIVIDED WE STAN D This year's presidential election should prove interesting. The country is almost evenly divided between Democrats and Republicans, and analysts expect another close race. Voters face their starkest choice in 20 years. As expected, President Bush has swung to the right since his Ian. 20, 2001 inauguration. From his solidly pro-in dustrial environmental record to the "gag" mle that withholds funds from in ternational groups that even mention abortion, Bush has demonstrated his al legiance to the right wing of the Repub lican Party. John Kerry, for his part, earned a rank ing as the most liberal senator in 2003 from the National Journal, a conservative political magazine. He fits the image the Bush administration seeks to bestow upon him as a wealthy Massachusetts liberal. The outcome of the Nov. 2 election will depend on a number of factors, most importantly the economic outlook and Iraq. The former looks good, the lat ter bad. The economy may neither help nor hurt Bush in this election. While he will likely be the first president since Herbert Hoover to lose jobs during his term, oth er economic indicators look rosier. Con sumer confidence rose sharply in April and the International Monetary Fund predicts growth in the United States will reach its fastest rate in 20 years. Iraq presents a much greater problem: It's falling apart. American soldiers have lost control of Fallujah and most of the important highways in the Sunni Trian gle. Rarely a day goes by without news of a roadside bomb or a cunning ambush. Bush hopes the much-vaunted June 30 turnover of sovereignty to an Iraqi gov ernment, whatever its form, will provide a way out. However, it's a public relations move conducted for the benefit of the American electorate. The United States Chuck Slothower Taking issue military will retain every meaningful source of power. Voters increasingly realize that the cost of the occupation, in terms of both mon ey and lives, is greater than what the Bush administration led them to believe. As much as Republicans will try to hide the truth from voters with photography bans and curiously timed requests for Congressional appropriations, Ameri cans know Iraq is going down the toilet. Hopefully, voters will concentrate on substantive issues and ignore the usual political mudslinging. What makes at tacks on character and experience so an noying is that they're so effective. Bush has a powerful weapon in his charge that Kerry is a flip-flopper. What makes it so powerful is that it's true. Ker ry has never met a politically advanta geous position he didn't like. He voted to give Bush the authority to invade Iraq, but refused to pay for the oc cupation afterward. He voted for the USA Patriot Act, but now criticizes it as an encroachment on civil liberties. The list goes on, which brings me to Kerry's first flip-flop: Vietnam. He served with honor and distinction in Southeast Asia, where he commanded a small boat and earned three Purple Hearts, a Silver Star and a Bronze Star for his courage. Kerry then returned to the United States and worked actively with Vietnam Veterans Against the War. This particular flip-flop shouldn't bother voters. Kerry went to Vietnam to serve his, country, and returned horrified by the r atrocities committed by his fellow sol diers. He took the only honorable course of action at that point and spoke out against the war. Conservatives gain nothing by alleg ing that Kerry's first Purple Heart — which the military awards for wounds sustained in battle — was the result of a mere scratch. If Kerry got shot badly only twice instead of three times, does it really matter? Such attacks also attract unwelcome at tention to Bush's record in the National Guard during Vietnam, when he joined a country club unit notable for its upper crust members and skipped out on it. Both men's Vietnam experience is ul timately unimportant to how they would act in office and distracts from more im portant issues. Kerry has pulled his punches in recent attacks on Bush. He told Hardball's Chris Matthews recently that weapons of mass destruction could still be found in Iraq. If Kerry wants to sit in the Oval Office, he needs to quit dancing around Bush and go for the knockout. It shouldn't be hard to do. Should Kerry do the unlikely and beat Bush in November, progressives will re joice for a short time. But they should considered themselves warned that Ker ry has too much Clintonian scheming in him and will sell progressives out when it becomes necessary. If Democrats want ed a progressive with a backbone, they should have nominated Howard Dean. Ultimately, Kerry will need the stars to align perfectly to defeat Bush. In the ad vertising age, Bush's $187.5 million re election fund speaks loudly. Contact the columnist atchuckslothower@dailyemerald.com. His opinions do not necessarily represent those of the Emerald.
