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About Oregon daily emerald. (Eugene, Or.) 1920-2012 | View Entire Issue (Feb. 2, 1999)
News Flash Harvard School of Public Health Stop the press! Those Harvard geniuses have produced yet another earth-shattering study: drunk en sex increases students' AIDS risk. For those of you who have never worn beer goggles in your life. Harvard officials say drinking alcohol can decrease inhibitions and lead to unprotected sex. What's next? A follow-up study to disprove the commonly held belief that alcohol can also make you better looking, smarter and one hell of a dancer? Send in the Clones Texas A&M U. It's common knowledge that dogs are man's best friend. In fact, throughout the centuries, people have gone to extremes to ensure the comfort and longevity of their pets. But a couple from Dallas has gone com pletely over the top. They have donated $2.3 million to Texas A&M to clone their beloved pooch, Missy, The Missyplicity Project is currently underway after urging from the couple, who told the scientists in a letter. "I howled at her. and she raised her nose and howled at the roof. I barked at her and she barked right back. I whined, she whined." We are afraid. We are very afraid. Skin and Bones Milwaukee Institute of Art and Design Don't call this model a bag of bones. Pegi Taylor, who poses for students at the Milwaukee Institute of Art and Design wants to donate her entire skeleton to the school and its future sketch artists. In fact, she's asking the U.S. Senate to designate the university as the nation's official skeleton production facility. Sounds like putting her heart and soul into her work just wasn't enough. The Naked Lunch U. of Kansas When patrons at Perkins Restaurant located in Lawrence, Kan., ordered some dessert late one night, they ended up getting more than they bargained for. Jaws dropped as two KU students and a local high school student entered the restaurant, sans clothing, and proceeded to distribute candy corn to all of the tables. But don't worry, these naked tricksters did have some semblance of modesty — they were wearing veils. Kiss Off U. of Alabama Kissing: It's not just a recreational sport anymore: it's educational, too. Four lucky Alabama student couples got up close and per sonal to demon strate a variety of ' smooches as part of a lecture on the art of kissing. Lip locking techniques shown ranged from % ART • ’ NSSIM6 the conventional to the bizarre, like the “spanking kiss" and the "violent Trobriand Island kiss.” Sounds like they're taking the term “tongue wrestling" a lit tle too seriously. Poop on You! U. of Arizona Though we rag on them quite a bit. we must admit school administrators have a tough job. But at Arizona, being an admin istrator is really for the birds. They have been sturggling with a very pressing issue: pigeon poop. They've tried decoys, they’ve tried cages, they've even tried drugging them, but the pigeons keep on going ... and going ... and going poop on everyone's heads. We say give 'em a taste of their own medicine — throw it back. Your Friends and Neighbors Pennsylvania State U. We have to agree — there's nothing like a nice, hot shower after a night of drinking. But here's some advice: make sure you're in your own bath room before you get butt nekkid. One Penn State student failed to follow this helpful hint and wound up with a citation from the local police department, after he was found in the buff in a total stranger's apartment. Apparently the young man tossed down a few brews and wandered into the wrong building by accident. So much for neighborly hospitality. The Marching Mauraders Southern U. vs. Prairie View A&M U. He was on the 50-yard line. Suddenly, a hulking figure came hurtling toward him. He braced himself for the impact of ... the tuba? No, this is not a story of a football game gone awry. Not exactly, anyway. During a football game between Southern and Prairie View , the half time show erupted into a brawl between the schools' marching bands. And the fight got pretty ugly. In fact, several of the participants pelted each other with weapons like drum sticks and trom bones. Guess that's what they mean by battle of the bands. Buck the System Metropolitan State College of Denver Fed up with million-dollar lawsuits? Check out the compensation a judge award ed to a group of professors at Metro. You could say the profs made a fast buck, but that was it. One dollar was all the restitution given to 72 professors who filed a law suit over what they felt were unfair salaries. Wonder if they headed to Taco Bell to splurge after the decision. Royal Flush Princeton U. It's tough to sleep in a wet bed, especially when you're not the one who doused it in the first place. Hopefully Princeton freshman Abigail Bagley-Young is sleeping a little more snugly since the university has given her humble little abode a complete disinfection. Bagley's dorm room ceiling caved in earlier this school year, dumping raw sewage all over her bed. Four days after Bagley-Young caused a big stink over the situa tion. the university got around to the clean-up. Cow Chips California State U., Fresno Scientists at CSU Fresno have discoverd the secret to milk pro duction: potato chips. That's right, the cows there — which rank 14th in the nation for milk production — munch on about 10 pounds of chips a day. Well, cows, munch away. Just don't start making bar-b-que flavored milk. Talk Dirty to Me U. of Michigan, Flint Sure sex sells, but does it sell schools? The U. of Michigan tried (although inadvertently) and ... sur vey says: no. In a slip-up of Freudian proportions, the school's admissions office sent out 25,000 letters to prospective frosh with a misprinted toll-free number. Yep. Michigan goofed and printed a sex-talk hotline instead. So. when unknowing high school seniors tried to call the university, they were greeted with heavy breathing and dirty talking. We bet the number of applications went way up.
