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About Oregon daily emerald. (Eugene, Or.) 1920-2012 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 24, 1997)
COHTACTIHG US NEWSROOM: ADDRESS: (541)346-5511 Oregon Daily Emerald E-MAIL: P OBOX3159 ode@oregon. uoregon.edu Eugene, Oregon 97403 ONLINE EDITION: www.uoregon.edu/-ode Perspectives EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Sarah Kickler EDITORIAL EDITOR Mike Schmierbach NIGHT EDITOR Nicole Krueger Laura Cadiz Mike Schmierbach Okay, we admit it, we’re bitter. It’s always best to be honest at the beginning, so no one can accuse you of hiding your motives. With that confession out of the way, we still think we have some very good ideas on how to reform interpersonal relations at the University and in the world. After all, we have a pretty good idea of what shouldn’t happen be tween two people; now we just need to establish what should occur. Thus, we present... The Rules: Setting a code OF CONDUCT FOR COUPLES A brief exploration of what things would he like if Mike and Laura ran the world Ban exes’ Too often, we find ourselves in the same social setting as an ex boyfriend or ex-girlfriend. Or ’ worse, we’re forced to humor the ex of our significant other. Frankly, it makes us ill. So, we propose that, when a re lationship ends, the dumper must relocate to a different area code than the dumpee. In return, the dumpee is not allowed to follow the dumper to the new location. Of course, defining “significant other" can be complicated — some people seem a little keen to use that term. So, we define sig nificant other as anyone whom you have seen naked in an explic itly sexual context. Reclaim virginity They say virginity is coming back into style, and we all know that nothing is more important than style. More to the point, there are some things we just don’t want to admit. Accordingly, we think people should be able to reclaim their virginity. Such a thing should not be handled lightly, however. You shouldn’t be able to take it back if you are simply bitter and recently dumped. Nor should you be able to reclaim it if you have had sex with multiple partners. If you were a virgin prior to your last partner, however, or at least a “reclaimed” virgin, then after a reasonable waiting period a single person should be able to take back his or her virginity. We suggest that point comes when you no longer fantasize about your former partner. No marriage No, we don’t mean you can nev er get married. Just don't get mar ried until you’re no longer sitting ~ next to us in class. Too-cute couples are bad enough, but too-cute couples with rings on their fingers are down right disturbing. At our age, we shouldn’t have to sit through a wedding ceremony unless it’s our parents’. The only bells we want to hear are the elec tronic ones in the EMU. Don’t even get engaged. That’s a reminder of marriage, which in turn is a reminder of our mortality. Illustrations by: Chris Hutchinson Seeing others There are enough ethically “shaky” people out there that standards need to be set on when a relationship is exclu sive — in other words, when you can’t “see other people.” For most of us, this isn’t a difficult issue. A certain sense of class and propriety prevails, and we don’t “cheat” on our partners. Or, if we’re a little on the slow side, we have one of those ground-establishing “talks.” On the other hand, mistakes are made. Some people seem so afraid of the term “commit ment” that they deny its exis tence. For them, we have a simple guide: If you have pos sessions at the residence of your partner, you aren’t al lowed to see anyone else. For example, if you ever say, “I’ll have to buy a toothbrush on the way to your place be cause I keep my spare at Sue’s," you are misbehaving. Public affection ;> This issue has come up before f in the Emerald, but we think it is / important enough to repeat. On this point, anyway, the dichotomy between the public and private spheres must be maintained. Physical contact between lovers is part of that private sphere. Above all else, the sanctity of the classroom setting must be maintained. We’re there to learn or perhaps to nap. We aren’t there to watch other people rummage around under each other’s clothes. In the classroom, there should be no physical contact. Hands may not be held; bodies may not be caressed; lips may not be pressed together. Outside of class, the rules are looser. Holding hands, embracing or even exchanging a quick kiss (no tongue) are okay. Any point at which both pairs of hands are not fully visible while a couple are in public view is not acceptable. These are certainly not all the restrictions we would impose upon behavior among current and former couples at the University. By implementing these policies, however, the school could take an important first step on the road to a less nauseating educational ex perience. Mike Schmierbach is the editorial editor and Laura Cadiz is the high er education editor for the Emerald. Their vieivs do not necessarily repre sent those of the Emerald. READERS’ VOICES Whai role do you think drugs and alcohol play in students’lives? ‘‘To relax and so cialize." Sarah Harpole “For some stu dents, it plays a very active role. Some of them know how to use drugs and alcohol to a moderate, small amount, and it doesn't run their lives. But un fortunately for some students, it does take over their lives and be comes a big problem.'’ Lauren Sivley “I think a lot of stu dents use it as a relief from all the stress." Shana Pennington “It doesn’t play that much of a role. I just think that because it's an issue and it’s in the papers, it only gets in is sues when bad things happen. I just saw in the paper yesterday about statistics showing how many people actually drink, and it’s kind of surprising." Ben Kossick “I think alcohol has a pretty big effect. It’s a way to bring everyone together and have peo ple get to know each other. As far as drugs go, I don’t really know. For some people it's a gathering point, like with smoking pot, but other drugs don’t have a real big effect around here.” Lindsey Brown A huge part because of the way our society is so centered on drugs and alcohol. They play a major part... People are looking for escape and acceptance, and that’s how they’re taught t0 do Lesley Shollmier Heather Austin Quoted “If you always wanted to attend Harvard, Yale or Princeton, The Teaching Compa ny offers Ivy League entry without the te dious application process, the as tronomical fees, the undesired re quired courses or the pressure of fi nal exams." The Interna tional Herald Tri bune, quoted in a direct mail adver tisement for The Teaching Compa ny. What’s left, ex actly?
