Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR
About Oregon daily emerald. (Eugene, Or.) 1920-2012 | View Entire Issue (May 26, 1982)
WWWAWWWwOwsftftMffi? Starting May 12 cookies and croissants by the half-dozen Chocolate chip cookies $2.25 Croissants $3.50 881 E. 13th 8-6 Monday - Friday on campus 9 - 5 Saturday 484-1662 Disco Happy Hour prices for the ladies, all day. Sunday: beginning at 8 PM Happy Hour: 4-7 PM Mon.-Fri. Well Drinks: $1.00 Free Hor d' oeuvres Only at the Holiday Inn Holidome Rd. 342-5181 McKay’s Open Pantry Delicatessen A FEATURING Broasted Chicken - by the bucket or the piece • Party trays made to order • Fresh home-made pizza • Fresh bagels and pocket bread • San Francisco style sour dough bread • 31 varieties Imported and Domestic cheese • 35 varieties lunch meat and sausages • Full line salad bar • Hot food to go • Fresh sandwiches made daily Hot or cold. Imported or Domestic foods with old-fashioned service — S fr H Green Stamps. Too! 1960 Franklin Bivd. Eugene 343-6418 Open 8 am to 8 pm daily 655 W. Centennial Blvd. Springfield 747-3004 The worst movie (so far) this year “Conan the Barbarian” Arnold Schwarzenegger CinemaWorld Rated R "Conan the Barbarian" is a shining tribute to Murphy’s taw Everything that could possibly go wrong, does First, there's the plot Schwarzenegger is Conan, a hulking gladiator-turned-ad venturer bent on revenge after snake-worshipper Thulsa Doom (James Earl Jones) slaughters his parents He meets up with shapely thief Valeria (Sandahl Bergman) and sly sidekick CASH For Textbooks Mon -Fri, Smith Family Bookstore 768 E 13th 1 Bl From Campus Pb 34^1651 Subotai (Gerry Lopez) and sets oft on a number of harrowing adventures The Big Quest, of course, is to set good King Os ric's (Max Von Sydow) daughter free from the evil clutches of Thulsa Doom, who wants her for his own nefarious purposes Although it would seem pretty difficult to go wrong with such a familiar, basic plot, writers John Milius and Oliver Stone do They leave rather large gaps in the story, like why Conan, the most famous gladiator in the land, is suddenly released scot-free by his master Or why Conan can reach the castle of Thulsa Doom a week before his friends do, despite the fact that they leave at the same time If these story jumps are dif ficult to swallow, try stomaching the dialogue Most of it is beau tifully crafted verse, like "Get them! ’, "Kill them!" and "After them!" The rest is deep, mean ingful expressions of emotion, mostly groans, grunts and death-screams. The writers do aim for something greater, but fail mis erably. The film opens with a line from Nietzsche: "That which doesn’t kill us makes us stronger " The writers show us that Thulsa Doom is utlimately responsible for Conan's strength, since he was respon sible for submitting Conan to the years of suffering and back breaking toil that have made him the musclebound fighter he is This theme is just too weak — too weak to convince Conan not to finish his quest for revenge, and too weak to convince the audience that "Conan" is any thing more than just your basic high-budget, poorly-written ad venture flick, trying to take ad vantage of the success of “Raiders of the Lost Ark ” Schwarzenegger delivers his lines with all* the subtle expres sion and feeling of an orangu tan Bergman, cast as someth ing of a blonde Marion Under wood, tries hard, but doesn't give her character enough oomph to make her motto, “You wanna live forever?” believable Then there’s Jones, who over plays his evil character so much that the snakes that surround him seem likable in comparison I Conan (Arnold Schwarzeneg ger) bites the tall of a giant snake in hair-raising scene of "Conan the Barbarian.” In hopes of saving the film the producers hired special effects man Nick Allder, who won an Academy Award for his work on •Alien ’* Alas, most of the special effects are just plain silly, like a huge cauldion of steaming green soup filled with human hands and heads (Cream of Flesh?), or a battle over Conan's dying body between his friends and the gods of death Even the bloody battle scenes are poorly done, with the typical spurting blood, decapitations, etc And if that wasn't enough, there s the editing Some scenes seem to stretch on in terminably, with no sense of actual time represented The battle scenes are hopelessly confused, and are actually bor ing This is the Ultimate Sin for adventure pictures If the viewer isn’t kept on the edge of his or her seat, there’s always the chance to stop and consider just how silly the whole affair really is. And once you've lost the viewer, it's almost impossi ble to get him or her back again •'Conan" not only failed to keep me on the edge of my seat, * it let me sit way back and just smile at its foolishness Director John Milius even has the gall to make a Hitchcock-esque ap pearance as a peddler of the snack “lizard-on-a-stick" right in the middle of the foolishness Even some nice background shots of scenic Spain and one cute scene where Conan punches out a camel can't save this, loser. ■'Conan'' is quite possibly the worst movie so far this year, so naturally the producers are already planning at least one sequel Talk about evil villains by matt meyer I ' '-- I'—rr I Seasonal Cannery Work in Salem Applications: takenJtli,v "nlv * * must be in person. Sat. June 12: 8:30 -11:30 & 1:30 - 4:00 Oregon Fruit Products Co. 150 Patterson St. NW (in west Salem off Edgewater St.)
