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About Oregon daily emerald. (Eugene, Or.) 1920-2012 | View Entire Issue (April 22, 1966)
Thank-You Notes Bride s Responsibility The weeks before your wedding will be like Christmas every day —except that you won’t have to give any presents in return. The bride’s only responsibility is to acknowledge the gifts as they ar rive, sending a handwritten note of appreciation for each one—in cluding those from relatives of your fiance whom you’ve never met, and from close friends. The wise bride plans her pre wedding schedule to allow time each day for acknowledging and recording wedding presents as they arrive. As each package is opened, it should be listed im mediately in a record book. Be sure to include a description of the gift, the name and address of the donor, the store from which it came, the date it arrived, and the date your thank-you note was mailed. Which Was Aunt Susan’s? If you expect to receive a lot of gifts, it’s best to attach a num ber corresponding to the listing on each one—then you'll know which silver candy dish came from Aunt Susan. Thank-you notes should be writ ten in blue or black ink on a good grade of white or off-white folded nctepaper. The bride’s name or monogram may be engraved on the notes but her married name or initial should not be used until after the wedding. Deco rated notes and those with "Thank You” or “Mr. and Mrs.” printed on them should not be used for thank-you notes. The important thing to keep in mind when writing your thank you notes is that each person re ceives only one—no matter how many you write. Each one should sound as warm and personal as you can make it. This is much easier to do if you write a few each day. Receive Only One It is difficult to make them sound truly appreciative if you try to write several dozen at once. In fact, if you postpone them until after the wedding, you may find it harder to relax during your honeymoon if you have a mound of unacknowledged gifts on your conscience. One way to keep your thank you notes from sounding stuffy is to picture yourself face to face with the person you’re writing to. You wouldn’t say, “I am very grateful for your most exquisite gift” to anyone in person, and such stilted language should never be used. Don’t be afraid to sound ex cited. Most people — especially older ones — love being praised because of the unique gift they selected. Refer to the individual gift—and the use you plan to make of it—as much as possible. If it happens to be a “mystery" gift, with a purpose even Ein stein would declare obscure, you can mention its color or material. It is much more gracious to ex press appreciation for a specific “piece of blue glass” or “silver container” than for a vague "love mmmmi lid PNintiHimnmim By BONNIE CHANG ARNESON HEATHER Karen Arneson of Ann Judson House announced her engagement to Jerry Heather, a graduate in political science who is on a fellow ship to Syracuse University, on Jan. 6. Miss Arneson is a graduate in music from Lakeport, Calif. Heather is from Sacramento, Calif. The wedding is planned for August. DOSTER KIMSEY The engagement of Alice Doster of Ann Judson House to Vic Kimsey was announced at a candle passing on Feb. 14. Miss Doster is a sophomore in elementary education from Springfield. Kimsey is a 1965 graduate and is presently ar, architect for Mercer Steel Co. CAMPBELL MEAD Jill Campbell announced her pinning to Stephen Mead at a candle passing on April 4. Miss Campbell is a sophomore in English residing in Highland House. Mead is a freshman in business administration who lives in Campbell Club. Both are from Banks, Ore. DAVENPORT•MEUSER Carolyn Davenport’s engagement to John Meuser was announced on Jan. 24 at a candle passing at Ann Judson House. Miss Davenport is a freshman in elementary education. Meuser is a junior in educa tion at Northwest Christian College. Both are from Mill City, Ore. CARTER - McALPINE The engagement of Sharon Carter to Bob McAlpine was announced to friends on April 13. Miss Carter, an off-campus student, is a junior in elementary education. McAlpine, a member of Theta Chi, is also a junior majoring in English. Both are from Salem. GARTRELL•ROTH The engagement of Lea Gartrell to Rod Roth was announced recently. Miss Gartrell, a secretary for Ward Insurance Agency, is from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. Roth, is member of Tau Kappa Epsilon, is a graduate in political science who will receive his master’s in June and will become an Air Force intelligence officer. Brides Always Ask May the groom’s family give the wedding? Regardless of the wealth of the groom’s family or the modest fi nancial means of the bride’s family, it is a rule of etiquette that the bride’s family give the wedding. This maintains the dig nity and independence of the bride’s parents, whose prerogative it is to give their daughter the kind of wedding they can afford. The only case in which an ex ception can be made is when the bride has no family. How are wedding gifts dis played? A bride should show her appre ciation for the gifts given her by placing each one in a position of greatest advantage. Very valu able presents are better put in contrast with others of the same quality—or entirely different in character. Colors should be care fully grouped and pieces that jar when together should be placed as far apart as possible. PROMISE from $150 Rmg «nlarged Only an ArtCarved diamond deserves its own precious throne. DREAM DIAMOND RINGS Authorized A.^5C*arve^ Jeweler ly gift.” But it’s best not to be too specific if you are not two hun dred per cent sure of the in tended use of the gift. What one bride thought was n "tall vase” turned out to be an umbrella stand. Try to put one thought besides "thank you” in each note. A per sonal touch, such as a comment about the wedding, an invitation to visit, or a reference to your new apartment, should always be included. Duplicate gifts—whether exact ly alike or only faint replicas— pose special problems. Although it is an accepted practice for brides to exchange duplicates (even Amy Vanderbilt ami Emily Post smile on the procedure) no one likes to think their gift was one of the ones that was ’‘ex changed." If the gift can be re turned without the giver being aware of it, go ahead—but you should keep it so Aunt Ellie won't be hurt when she discovers her silver icebucket is missing from your new home. Whatever you do, don’t even think of mention ing duplication or exchange in your thank-you note. Those select few who are not offended by ex changes are most often the ones who send money. Damaged Gifts Damaged gifts should also be handled with great care. If you receive'one from a local store, return it on the sly for replace ment. If it comes from an out-of town store, write a letter of ex planation and wait for their in structions. Be sure to ask them not to mention the damage to the donor. Some brides who failed to make such a request were most embarrassed to learn that the stores involved did contact the donor—after thank-you notes with no mention of damage had been mailed. If a broken gift was mailed by the donor, check to see if it was insured. If so, it may be returned with a note of explanation so that the giver can collect the in surance and make the replace ment. Don’t mention damafte of an uninsured or other non return able Kift. or the donor may feel obliged to send another. In short, try to make all of your thank-you notes sound as sincere ly appreciative as those for your lirst and most welcome gifts In the long run, it’s the gesture of giving that’s important not the gift itself SOLID COLOR sports Jackets rate high on the men’s fashion list for spring. Bill ('amp, a senior in sociology, models one from his personal wardrobe. At Hoffmans choose your pattern from the china most preferred by brides... i_e: ini o>c MANSFIELD is graciously at home in any period, enriched with bands of pure 24 K gold. 5-piece place setting $19.95. BROOKDALE wears a delicate bridal wreath of hand-applied orange blossoms between platinum bands. 5-piece place setting $25.95. Brides-to-be are cordially invited to come in and register their selection of china and silver with us. There’s no obligation. 873 WILLAMETE 344-5415
