PECULIAR
WAYS OF
JOAQUIN
The Poet Appeared In High
Rubber Boots at a
Lecture
Jonquln Miller, poet of the Sierras,
and other things too numerous to men
tion, lias Btnrtled Stanford University
with an innovation in the etiquette of
introduction, Bays' tho Berkoloy Ga
zette. According to tho rugged singer
of field of forest tho proper method of
meeting n miss is to fix her with a basi
lisk eye, dart violently forward, aiezo
her firmly by hor lllly whlto hand and
kiss hor passionately in tho open palm
thereof. Tho osculatory introduction
will hardly becomo popular at Stan
ford. Tho first demonstration in this now
socinl convontion took placo nt a ro-
cont meeting of tho Stanford English
Club nt which Joaquin Miller was tho
guest of honor and tho honored guest.
Ho had been enlightening tho fair co
eds, who gather to woo tho muso, with
some of tho finer points of "Education
in China " but tho assembled guests
damsels found tho picturesque pioneer
much mora interesting than tho Orien
tal ndmlnUtration of tho throo It's."
Tho forty minutes of "Education in
China" was doccntly buriod with po-
jlito npplauso nnd a twitter of anticipa
tion followed at tho possibility of meet
ing ono so far romoved from earthly
.thoughts and so wrapped about with
tho flro of inspiration. Madame Vice-
'rosldont approached tho poot, nnd in
llior wnko wns a bovy of Stanford's
nircst flatterers of literary lions. In
troduction wero requested.
Tho poet's bonovolont faco lighted
.with tho Approval of beauty in all its
manifestations. Tho first blushing nnd
bashful victim was led forward and
sho heard her own modest namo coupled
with his who had mado a continent
echo with his musical numbers.
Joaquin Miller smiled kindly and
then to tho undlnguisod amazement of
tho cntlro assemblage, tho whlto-bcnrd-
cd author1 bent over and kissed tho
girl's whlto palm.
Sho flushed and backed nway while
her companion beat a prcclpitato re
treat to safo quarters. Through the
omalndor of tho cvonlng personal in
troductions to tho poet wero somowhnt
at n discount and thcro wero few. who
dnrod his loonlno presence Tho oscu
latory introduction will probably re
main uniquo In collego society until
omo of tho moro brilliant minds iiv
cnt somo proper guard and countor.
gentle blto might prove effective.
All this happened nt tho Kappa Al-
ilia Thcta houso, which Is ono of the
ost select of tho sororities, but It
as by no means nil that happened.
ho llterateur of Piedmont coused a
social upheaval in soveral directions.
Ho camo to tho reception ciau in
klgh rubber boots, n soft shirt and his
poetic hair. Incidentally ho wore a
'dress suit, but dress suits oro so corn
to .. . .. . .1 it. .11.. In.t In
rnon tnnt mis wu mcureiisiiMj .., ...
So consternation cnusod by tho high
op boots.
Scarcely had tlio poet arnvou uoioru
"fib distracted young ladies who wero
Resent to worship at the poet's shrine,
wero doeply agttateu 10 loarn mm
t tho nootte attributes of tueiri guest.
was nn extreme aversion to tho use of
ts.Ha and fork. Tho elaborate menu
was abandoned and tho difficulty solved
& serving merely coffee and wafers.
bo lecturo began and for tho next
rty minutes all waa sorene. Tho now-
phrases and eloquent penous uii
on tho nrcsent condition of "Edu-
tlon in China" reeled on undisturbed
tho airitoted member of the cm-
e-soeklnff society began to believo
at entertaining real poets, even those
o woro boots and refused tho ser-
e of knives nnd forks, might be ac-
Stnplisbed if tact were used.
prs; s est- - !
a Into tho poet '8 introductory meiu-,
trouueory -
Ks thore wero still a lew wno ",
. . ... m -i .iA,f
is presence. Ono or tue mo j-rum.-,
... 1 ..-1.
to 7 towards'
Rent of tho guests saun
ae "poet's corner."
"I know you well through your
Rorks, Mr. Miller," sho remarked as
owner.
1 "Woman," replied tho poet, "those
bo Ho will go to hell."
Tho ensuing silence was almost iouu,
nd conversation dragged.
o
A Disastrous Calamity.
wbon
sT It is a disastrous calamity, wnon
rou lose your health, because InJiges-l
lion and constipation bava sappea
away. Prompt relief can bo baa in wr.
lae'B New Lifo Pills. They bulla up
four digestive organs and cure bead-
Iche, dizziness, eolle, constipation, etc
luaranteed at J. O. Perry's drug store
rS1 &
if M W
g O
WANTED
JUST AS
WRITTEN
Editor Printed the Wedding
Notice the Way the
Man Wrote It
Tho Emporia (Kan.) Gazctto Bays:
You have nover heard of John Lill.
Ho is a meek and lowly country editor
nt Macksvlllo, Knnsas. Last week ho
wrote up a woddlng in tho community
for his paper tho Macksvlllo Enter
prUc. Ho did his best, but tho bride's
family was dissatisfied becauso John
didn't spread it on. Tho father of thq
brldo enmo to tho offlco of tho Enter
prise and said that John Llll didn't
know how to wrlto up a wedding. Tho
father brought in n notlco which ho
said would bo aatlsfnctory. Ho said,
howovcr, he wished it to run "just ns
It was written." Every editor In this
country has theso requests, and com
plies with them by politely correcting
tho errors of grammcr and spelling
and construction and bad tasto, until
tho articlo handed In is fairly present
able. But John Llll who should havo
a Carncglo hero medal lot tho nrtlclo
left by tho brldo 's father run "just ns
It was written," and here Is tho way
it appeared:
"March 1st, 1005
"Married at tho homo of tho Brides
parents, South East of Macksvlllo Mr.
W. Parks Tuckor & Miss Ruth Green
wood, by Rev. Gcbhnrt with heartfelt
solemnity by all present.
"Tho guests who attended woro Mr.
& Mrs. Qrccnwood giving a Minnsota
Sewing Machino, Mr. Tuckor silver
sugar bowl with spoonholder attnehed
Mrs. Tucker silver knives & forks Miss
Tucker whlto bod sprend, Mr. Scott
Tucker allvor ten spoons, Undo F. Sni
der silver tablespoons.
"Brothers of tho brldo presents not
nrrived.
"Mr. and Mrs. Tuttlo beautiful wa
ter sot, Mr. and Mrs. Vnnco whlto dam
ask tablo cloth, Mr. Guy Vanco glass
cako stand, Miss 8usio Vanco glass
dish, Mr. nnd Mrs. Perry Campbell n
glass fruit set and to mnko tho pres
ents moro pleasing tho glasswaro all
matches.
"Dr. W. h. Prultt of St. Louis, carv
ing set.
"Also a number of presents from
relative that were unable to bo here
as well as tho book entitled Bridal
Qrcotings by Dnnlol Wise, D. D., from
Rev. Gobhnrt.
"To mako things moro amusing just
as a number of 18 or 20 drawn In a
wngon by four horses dulng their best
at pulling their jovial crowd to near
tho spot destined to bo battered ami
hammored being united with serlthcs
nnd shrieks from a feminine discord,
and within sight though it was dork,
as thoy were looming over a small
ridgo n gun wns fired which startled
tho stoalthy merrymakers, until thoy
cried out, ho; somo ono take care or
me, etc, etc."
Newspaper men all over tho country
aro with John Lill. If ho is damaged
by tho angry relatives of tho happy
pair, it should cost hlra nothing for
repairs. Tho prorosiion suoum wuu
bv him. Every odltor in this broad
land has promised himself that some
time he would do what John i.ui nas
LADIES
A word to tho wise Is sufficient. If
you aro weak and delicate or In need of
e, tonle for your various organs try
Hoatetter' 8tomach Bitters.. Thou
sands of women all over tho world ae
knowledge it to be tho best woman's
- : r j-n.-
," - ' . .. anno. Dizziness,
..."v -----
Nnrviuia iiwwuhwmvi
- ' - - ", , .-,... costive-
TMinunir zidous. uiww.v. .
.. ... ' ..i nr Kidney
Indlgtion, IWP or Kidney
Troubles.
HOSTETTER'S
STOMACH BITTERS
To tie Cotmtry People
When in town tako your meals at the
Star Restaurant, 339 Court Street, ad
joining Wade's hardware store. Meals
at all hours, 15 centsi Phone 301 ite
U. J. LEHMAN
Baah and doors. All kind of house
finishing. 'Phono 131 black. Also two
. nf warehouse for rent: elerator
nn
" ""
PAIt,Y OAggfAI. JOTJBKA 8AX3DJ,
"1" i ililiSMMwsM.ijiiniitiiVi7iMs7l
oxirsaparilla. Mends
m a jmwwssjru
sna"crcd nerves. Givcsahcalthy
cd t Pale cheeks. Puts good
flesh on thln chl,drcn. Takes off
pimpics, rashes. Ask vour doc
tor to tell vou ahntif tf. f-.?!.4r"0?--
done, and ovcry editor 1ms been afraid
to do it when tho chnnce came. Oynma
may bo great In his line, but whllo tho
editors of America nro devoting big
black, burly typo to Oynma, let thorn
not forget bravo John Llll, who nctu
ally did what wo havo nil threatened
to do ro many times. '
STRAIN TOO GREAT.
Hundreds of Salem Eoadors rind
It So.
Tho hustle nnd worry of business men,
Tho hard work nnd stooping of work
men, Tho woman's household enros,
Aro too great n strain on tho kidneys.
Backache, headache, sldoachc,
Kidney troubles, urinary troubles fol
low,
A Salem cltizon tells you how to
cure them nil.
Jacob E. McCoy, brldgo builder nnd
contractor, residing on Capitol street,
second houso boyond Mill creek, says:
up to flvo or six years ago. Along
about that timo my kldnoys com
menced to bother mo. Thcro was not
so much bnckacho, but tho irlnclpal
symptoms wero in connection with tho
kidney secretions. A strain or over
exertion very ofton caused hemorr
hages of tho kidneys. I cannot say
that it was so painful, but it was very
annoying. I used various remedies,
and whllo somo gavo rollof, others
wore worthless. In somo way Doa'n's
KJdnoy Pills wero brought to my no
tice, and when up town I dropped into
Dr. Stono'e Drug Storo and procured a
box, taking them ns directed. A fow
doses gav very canvincing proof that
thoy wero going to tho right spot, and
though I enn't say they havo curod me
as I may novor bo curod, I can state
that they gavo mo wonderful rollof. I
havo a high opinion of Doan's Kid
ney's Pills and, cheerfully rccommond
thorn."
For salo by all dealers. Price CO
cents.
Fostcr.Milburn Co., Buffalo, New
York, solo agonU for tho United
States. Romembor tho name Doan's
and take no other.
Tho Roseburg district fair will b
hold September. 12 to 10.
X-RAYS
Appreciation furnishes a fulcrum for
tho lever of our best endeavors.
Religion Is a corporation whoso stock
is free and dividends sure.
Tho man with n mission generally
needs a Httlo money to help It along.
That man has claspod tho hand of
misery who has dUcovcrcd ho baa a
liver.
Despito how others may struggle to
got along, tho eounterfelter manages to
mako monoy,
Somo peoplo marry for influence,
some for love but tho minister mar
rlvs for monoy.
0
Deafness Cannot Be Cured
Br loeal applications, as they cannot
reach the diseased portions of th ear.
Then is onlr oas way to cur deafness,
and that is by sonstitutional remedies.
Deafness is eauted by an Inflamed ton
dltlon of tbs mitsout lining of ths Eus
tachian .Tubs. Wkea this tub is in
flamed you bare a rumbling sound r
Imnerfeet hearincr. and when it is en
tirely closed, deafness Is th result, and
unlets th inflammation can be taken
out and this tub restored to its normal
condition, bearing will b destroyed for
ever; nine eases out of ten ar caused
hr Catarrh, which is nothing but aa
inflamed condition of the mucous sur
faces.
Wo will cire Ono Hundred Dollars
for any case of deafness (caused by Ca
tarrh) that eannot be eared by Hall 1
Catarrh Cure. Send for circulars tie.
F. J. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, O.
Sold by druggists, 75e.
Take Hall's Family Pills for Consti
pation.
r
TUr. ( annui satisfaction in know-
.L.t .. miii wha invented the
tag i" " -
dun. remains unwept, unbonored and
unsung.
"I Thank the Lordl"
Cried Hannah Plant, of Little Rock,
Ark., for the relief I got from Bueklen's
Arnica Salve. It cured my fearful run-
-i,,,, ns. which nothing else would
beal, and from which I bad suffered (
five years." It is a marvelous bealer.
Guaranteed at J. C. Perry ' drug store j
Ue.
OMflON, FRIDAY, MAT 26, 1805.
Whllo hunting wolves, Mr. Wright,
of near Fuldn, in western Klickitat
county, fell from a log, his gun striking
in 'bupIi a manner that tho chargo of
shot entered the old man's groin, nnd
ho. died within n few minutes.
DcnrGus: I have solved tho mother-
in-lnw prohlem.just giro her regularly
Holllstcr's Rocky Mountain Ten. It
will mako her hoalthy, ..happy and do
cile ns a lamb. 35 cents, Tea or Tab
lets. Stono's Drug Store.
We Ate
Pepaed
to Save
Yot Money
It will pay plnno purchasers to learn
our prices bofore making their decision.
Wo carry tho grentost varloty of instru
ments and do tho largest business of
any concern on the coast. Largo Bales
and many of thom at small profit is our
policy nnd what mnkes tho saving to
you. Moderato terms of paymont, ev
en on the most costly styles of high
est grade pianos, full guarantees and
money back (n avory instance where
every claim we make is not fully veri
fied by the instrument.
Pisnola demonstrations upon roquest.'
Come in and see us.
Chlckerlng, Wober, Hobart M. Cable,
Story & Clark, Schumann, Jacob Doll
and other makes hero now for your in
spection.
EILERS PIANO HOUSE
Room 7 McCormlck BIk.
A. L. LOVELACE, Mgr.
eeHnio)MT
TUB AIUUVAX. OF SPRING,
primitive method in tho uso of in
prlmative metliods in tho uso of in
ferior flour. The Salem mills flour Is
the best now made, and bettor than
any that ever was made. It contains
all tho nutritions qualities that can
be got out of the very best whoat, and
Is sweetest and best flavored of all
cereal food products.
SALEM rLOUUINO MILLS.
You should practice economy .in buy
ing groceries, beeause every penny you
sav on your purchase is a penny
earned.
Th way to save the largest percen
tage on vtty dollar, I to buy at our
tor. We always offer full value for
your money.
Baker, Lawrence & Baker
Succeeson to nsrritt It Lawrence.
Huic Wing Sang Co
China and Japanese Fancy Goods, Mat
tings and Dry Goods, Silks, Em
broidery Laces. Make up new line
GenU' and Ladles' Furnishing Goods,
Suits, Wrapper, Skirts, White Under
wear. Sale cheap. Court street, Salem,
Oregon. 'Phone Black 2155.
4-H M 1 1 1 It 111 I'M H--H
1
:: Ice Cte&m
11
Vt pint in paper pall ......10a ;
I 1 pint in paper pail 18e ) )
1 quart in paper pail ...... 25o
, A gallon in paper pall . ,..60c , ,
At
;
Zinn's
lllPflr OvS''
4 !
PERTINENT POINTS
FOR ADVERTISERS
By the Journal Ad Man.
Zft3laasWHAKaBftaftlBABAMMABetltlAeMsUltAMHI
Tho peoplo who do not llvo in this
city nnd yet who "do somo of their
shopping hero," aro important to those
of our merchants who seok wider mar
kets. Theso people rend this newlpa
por, for they nro "interested in this
city," In Its news, in its stores.
Any part of your advertising appro
priation which is spent to reach "peo
plo who do not rend newspapers" is
wasted. Peoplo who do not rend news
papers do not read advertising nt nil.
Most of them cannot read.
Merchants who expect mid-summer
"dull days" as n matter df course, ns
inevitable, nro pretty euro to got what
they ozpoct. And merchnnts who ex
pect, through Increased advertising ex
penditures, to enjoy busy days all sum
mer nrt, nlso, pretty euro to "got what
they expect." It's tho universal law.
A small nnd spiritless store-advertisement,
in dnys llko these, will lull
your cash registers to sleep. And a
cash rcglstor, llko n man, should sloop
only at night.
Use
EPPLEY'S
PERFECTION
BAKING POWDER
It is the Best
Ask Your Grocer for It
fifiif mif iainiit idumtmi tm
I f-r liWW'fWm'
leetJJsjtsjjtsiiajtifcejsjJta(ej
Ae L F R A S E R
Successors to Burroughs k Fraser.
Plumbing, Tinning
and Roofing
Cornice Work, mating nnd Building Work of all kinds; estimate
made and work guaranteed.
307 BtaU Street, Salem. Phono 1511. '
wSCJT"
?"
fy.
A timid man makes n dollar his pri
onerj n courageous man makes it hi
servant. Evory dollar spont In news
paper advertising Is sent upon a fruit
ful errand and it comes back bringing;
other dollars with it.
"Ho that deslrcth riches musk
stretch tho string that will not
rcnchj.' nnd tho merchant who sects
prosperity must often ndvortlso n, Ht
tlo moro than ho can "afford."
Tho "Httlo morchnnt" who spend
ns much each month for nowephper ad
vertising ns bo sponds for rent will find
his expenditures for both of theso items
of oxpenso increasing amnzlngly.
"Wo don't LEAP to tho top of m
lnddor Wo climb." And wo dout
build a big storo nt a time. And to.
"stop advertising now nnd then" to t
tear down n pnrt of tho building.
Tho wiso ndvortiser of a storo no lon
ger writes wholly for women, but for
their husbands ns well. Men, nowa
days, not only "rend tho nds" but
they "shop" in their own quick andt
blunt ways.
THERE'S NO FOOL
LIKE AN Old) FOOL
But tho young ono that pays out hi
good monoy for dry, tough and Infetlc
meats when he eau get prime, juiey tm9
tonder steaks, chops and fllots for th
snnio priee right here at all times. Ovr
meats are cut from the best fed and!
fattest cattle, and is always satisfactory
E. C: CROSS
State Btroot Market.
Phone 201,
THE PICK OP THE FOREST
Hae been taken to supply the stock of
lumber in our yard. Oar tock i J
complete with nil klndi of lumber.-
Just received a car load of No, l! !
shingles, also a car of fine ohak. J
We are able to Oil any and all kind'
of bill. Come and let as show yon
our stock.
Yard and office aear 0, P. pastem er T
depot. Phon Main (SI,
QOODALE UUMBER CCS 4
SHOD STYLE,
SHOB SATISFACTION,
SHOE SAVINd
In wear, worry and cost all find good
showing in our shoo salesrooms. There'
a certainty about out footwear that an- V
pools to people who don't want to wear
a pair of shoes a month or two to prove
'em, Our guarantee goes a long way
with folk who have known n many
year. You'll share their satisfaction
once you've tried pur shoe and pur
merchandising method.
JACOB VOGT
V It
'and twitching facilities.
5c