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About Weekly Oregon statesman. (Salem, Or.) 1900-1924 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 5, 1900)
WEEKLY OREGON STATESMAN, Friday, October 3, 1000. ? Issued every Tuesday STATESMAN PUBLISHING COMPANY K. J. UCNDBICK8, Marnier. SUBSCRIPTION KATES. One year, in advance. fl; Six months, in advanccfSOjents;' Three months, iu advance, 25 cent; .One year, on time, l.t!5. Th Statesman has been estab- liimrd for nearly fifty years, and it has some subscriber who-have received it nearly that long, and many-who hzve p.r to alii responsible person who or read it for a generation. Some ot ier it. thortgu tlrcy may not send the these object to having tne paper ais- continued at the time of expiration of their subscriptions, tor the benefit of these and for other reasons, we have concluded to discontinue subscriptions only when notified to do so. , All per- sons paying when subscribing, or pay- . ITojqK'flty' continues to In the para ' mount issue of the Republicans, and It if a sound anil substantial Issue that exist everywhere. Candidate Bryan says we cannot Hpcuri title to people by force or ly purchase. It i 'suggested that accord ing to that theory we must 'hare ac quired Tex it 4 and Louisiana -on a Clrrislmas tree. The New York Herald has made a 4 at ful m1I of the states, which gives Melvinley U-S Vote, and Bryan ltH; doufhful, 21. The loultful states are Indiana, Montana and Idaho. The states which voted for, -Bryan four years ago, ami are glvet as sure Ui vole for McKlnley, are South Dakota. Kansas, Washington and Wyoming. The stales which voted for MeKluley four years "ago. ami are placed lu tin Itryau column this1: year, are Kentucky and Maryland. The Ne.v York "Herald come pretty nearly knowing what It is talking aiiout. wlien it comes to isditieal matters. It does not adhere to any olitieal party. The fairly remunerative price re ceived bv the fruit srrowei's this si- soti result lit many Is-netUs, Indirect an well as direct. It distribute a lot of money .lu the country. whit-It a sist In a thousand ways hi the maiii tenauw of orderly society .and pro- . gres and thrift generally. It makes -11 greater dcmaml Cor -.nursery- stock, to put out new orchards ami replen ish ohl one, a mV just uoW the nursery manager, are securing, nioiv liclp. and trj-ing to get-still more men The partial success of our fruit grow er this yea j' lias lNeu a great thing . fr the country! We hofe for full 'crops' for mauy yars lu -the future, which w ill make -of Jhls braucli of in iluniry an enormous factor io the Jinlielrial and IukHics lire of , Oregon and the I'aciUe Northwest. , for ;oLi ii;aioci:ats. "If hTe is auy one who Iw-lleves the Colli 'Htandard Ls a goiHl thing, or that Jt must !e malntaiiieil, I warn Mm niH to cast his vole for tin? Ik :his I promise hiiu it will not i loaiot.iiiKil ji) tins country any long er than I am aide to get rid of it. Ifoti;.YV. J. Itryau. Is, tMecli.;. at KuoXville, Teuu., tyeyi. Hi, lXsi . IBMtH'RATlC 'iOLICITUnC. The state of Oregon "wMch went ner li.iit Ki-iMvlilUuii at tlit- kmiiih lne refusetl to res'al the ltl;ick l.-iw of tikis Mate, which if strictly con M-iucted would kei Negroes out of the slare entirely, Ayauy Democrat. This intimation of solicitude for the Interesl'vf t4e Irfack man. counitig from a lU-mwmth? iKtier, Is Ueckhtltr ivfn-shhig Her reading one of Till-i tnaus ptsthes Jn tlw Senate tm the subjet of the dlsfrauchi'tiieut of tho Negro; Iu which be expresses the true rctitiiuent of the lkmocratie luirtyj lie said: f ' ) I H-ise now to. recaiutula-te 11 idly, hi the l-st waj I can. the con ditions which brought alsMit fhe ne ocssity.'-' tor ftutling Ialht-lKX4'H. sliooiing Netmes. and for udng vUt-1-tice and fraul lu taking charge f our go enuuit In South Carolina. We made up out- minds that tlie ltth and ITdh aiueiidmeiris to the Contl!ntlon wcix' null anI void, that the acts of . "oiiure tinder hem ..were null ami void: that oaths reiuiretl by such law were null am! void: and we re"Hlveil that the wealth. lutelUem-e and piM irhviUui. lM-loitging only to the white jM-opie of the eta UN should selj the 1 gmeinmeiit, etc. Coiig. Record, HE WILL tlET MANY. The New York "Slaats ZHtuuj" ..ms tiie ;ermans "inlt uikhi a 4I0I- lur of stay kind f iihii': 'whitf worttM lm cttrts no iiMire ami no less. liry- na will get no votes from nien ho'l- Ing this tiew. F.xcli.inge. l . h i ill. t- ii: (iiri iiir mw- Je'r'ty of his cle-tjral votes, from the Sout'. on ni-ttnt of tlie Iwllots of tinea rjii ug tuis view. ,1 ue 'reun- tug seutinieut of Si Hit her 11 Democrat it In favor of sound money. And he w i'l get . these electoral votes oil ac rimt f He Inltots, of men win are lpot-d to the' Ticws of Hryan and the declarations of the Knan piat form 0:1 the nmstiou of expansion.! A large part of - these voters, f too. are oj1ish1 to the tariSf views of Itryau ml Ids i.silitH'al, aggregation . - ! Thii a;toiiialoits situaMoti.j It 'n a riijjrkili!.- fonditinu of nffairii. and Friday by iLe ' " I -i-' 1 i ing in advance, will have the benefit o the dollar rate, Dut ji they do not pa, lor six months, the- rat, will be $1.25 a tr HfWailrr u.' wilt '-cnt ih r- money, ,. wun ,tne unacrsuaaing mai they arejto pay $1.25 a year, tin case they let the subscription account run over, six months. In. order that there may be 00 misunderstanding, we .will ktep this notice standing at this place in the paper. It1 sliows the strength of the party 11.1 uie of tlw? IeinH-niey. which 31 r. I'.ryau has approprlateil for the uss of this campaign, as he did for .the purpose of the due four years ao. DEAR BOX .LETTERS NO. If. .My I tear Boy: So old man Skinner says that. there, will lie war iu the Philippines ,fcr twenty years ye; "tlett- we will sooii seeTrlM tlim wheu men will lie eon trrlpHsI in every township for service fa China, and that we are lHuiiiL,to have a financial crash next spring; and tlien the oor people will see the hard est times -they ever saw. ' "' ' Wdl, ,I guess tfte wld man Is a typi cal Deutoerat. lie' -ertaiuly. has a'll? tls symptoms. Perhaps I had lieMer tell you wluit the syuiptoms are. . i There j are ei-rtaiu constitutional character is tis which distinguish tin iHunwratie iparty and oposite charac ttiistics j which distinguish the Repul licam party. When I tell you what they ' a riK you will we why I want, you io le a Republican. 1.1. Tbf Democrats are iesiihiistic. TlMy always look ou the dark side Tli'" ierpetually exiect evil ahead aud see nothing but the evil in . th: things tlmt now are. You pick up at gveragP: Democratic platform and you find it full of phrases like tu. following: "We 1 irotest," we tie jioutu-e." we tliiapprove.'" "wv view with alarm." One of the. strongest reasons against, the party I that they are always striving! to make-the peo lIe diHcouteuted wih their lot and to till them w'lrtteahxiou fordsnliiigs Tot the future. Riglitr'In the middle o. abiindauce and cjiieer and victory, they insfstf that we are ail-going "to the bow-wow.. ' -M ' ' ' . Now it is the nature of Itcpuldlcaus to. Is? optimistic., The Republican party see -the bright side. j.Thaukfu! for thf blessings of the : past, they look forward with con tideuce to th future.! Tiliey exjieet goisl things and the eXctatitii helps tiring gisHi thiug. Io IUki.. They rejoice in the great ih-hs ami prosperity 'of our highly fa v oris I land. They look umi ou. wdusils ami churclh's. our farms am. factories, our army and navy, and their' plal forms icoatuiu phrases Ifkt These: ) "Tliaiikfui for the past, "we rejoice," "rve t-ougraitulate," "we ioint with iirlibv" They bring to the leo ple a sotig of hope and cln-er and con tent. Re a Reptibliau, my ?loy, and ""keep f sweet. IHm't et yottrstdf gH Htttrvi . auU jiessiuiisUir. ,,j vi : Th DeiiuS-ratic party eius una iiie to learn from ex'wrieuee. Ou reiisott why I tit in easily into "the Republican "Kirty is iKS-ause 1 i-tiu lean j from exeriein-e. Kiglit year agoTjwas a .free trader. I read a'loitt frs' trade In a lsok and was con vinced. It .was: a very nic Iook and the fre rade: tlH'ory was presented iu a tery uk-e way.- I still lusist that free trade Is ai nice thing lo a Isiok so long as you ke-p it in the look; but Wlien you take it out of the book and apply It towoI and eggs and pig Iron aud thiug It doi'sn't work worth a eeut. Tire .; vxiKrience or this etmntry vfroni 185c; -to lMt'7 made tue a. iirottHTnilst. Rut our Demo cratle friends jhsive failed to learn the lessen. In. tlii-ir platform thl year they still denounce our protective tariff law. " t ;';-;: " - ' - ,: . - If, there. Is anything posMirely, set tled bv the exisTieuce of nations. It tIjjt u tj,mar,i for a nation's ...... ,nra WAri.r- 1 is gonu r or :ceniuries xue uauous ! bunirleil along emleavorlujr to keen up two standards, silver ami gold, with' the result that thejeomiiarative v values of the! two metal - were : eoti- stautly c bunging and the cheaper one dri r in g t he ot her ou 1 4 of el rc ula t ion. making . etimwy wan, values ua-c-t4ahi, exchange: troublesome, '. and coiuineree- difilcult. Tlirough, expert em e. tlte nations. me after auother, h-arntsl that the honest way and the best way is to have one standard and that standard the best mouey gold with a hundred cents worth of gold lu tlie dollar. We have learneil that, since a standard dollar Is a measure of. value,, it; should contain the value that It retresents. , ' "' . All dvilizisl leople In the world thave biaruetl this except, the Populte- th-DenMH-rat'e paf ty. Tbey ' come ort lu this year of oitr bird Rum and projiose to roll back the wheels of - . k . ..I lrfr3.'r.rn -vr DD3Uc ai Now the . Republican party ' does Icaru by exiKTience. It kceiw up with the procession. Wbeu a " thing has twn (rlpil anil ..iitnl wanting. rl'.a Republican iarty drops It. When a thing has been proved to be good by experience,5 the : Republican r party sticks to It Mr boy. the Republican iwrry is not perfect by a, long ways, It has some men In K who are jiot 1 .,,,ut. v... ...i some such in a worm like this, it may sometimes make mistakes. But tne oroati immuicui : principles 01 jue luirtr are true and riant and -it Is the party that learn from experience. Vou be a Republican und you will not 1m sorrv - -5 r ' .. YOUR FATTIER. - SUCCESS OF A MANIA l'ROTEHT: A word of houorabje meutiou ami congratulation -' Is due to the gold lulu- ers of Victor. - Colorado. SoinelKsly had lHen stealing ore from the mine, ami the miners were ordered to strip; and pass naked from one dressing room to another; in entering and leaving the mine.- Naturally enough. self-resist'ting men resented that .In dignity and jrotestHl against it. They have won, and tlie prediction may lie ventured that there will Is; less ore - stealing uoxy -than there was ljefore. lust , so far as men are put hi their honor a iiuiiiIkt of them will respond lo tills appeal who are ealkius to other arguments. . Tliere Is. feally no guixl reasn fori humiliating a fellow-man lscau-e he is .obliged to work with his hands for his living and ; there are very good reasons against it. - it is --high .time that -the spirit of snoiibery anl class consciousness was banished from therState.' American employer's sense of rela tiouship to his employes. -'Let him re niemlHT that they are not importetl animals from some other sphere, but men like himself, with objections very like his own to doing things that he would not like to have to do. 4 The employer who insults his lalor writes himself down as a cad of the Unit water; and the time is coming when just under hi im will lie written ihe name of tlie employer who refuses to be as courteous and reasonable with the 'laborer-.' who Is grimy With the lust of his service as with the man who sits in the next chair at directors' hieetiug. ; 1 . 1 rilE DOLLAR. BEFORE THE MAN. Candidate Bryan 'accuses the Reiub- lican -luirty of pulling , the dollar be fore the win. In one sense Mr. Brv in Is -right, remarks an excliange. The lieiiuoiicau party, iiy adhering con rstentiy to the iwdicy of Kiving pro- ie-tion to AiueHeau iudustrhs and thus siw'urinir eiitv! of .work "at good wages to f America u . workmen, has; put the ilollar lief ore 'the' man rigid directly before him where. he can get hold of it. Tlie savings bank reconls J hmiii iue iui luree yesirs ami a uair of proHH-fiou prove that the 'jeple of ihe country hare not been slow In gathering; together the dollars w hich have Tieeu put Ix-fore them. A PUOSPERITY ROW. A new source of trouble has come ut of McKinley .prosperity vin .Kan sas. At altua two farmers got . to ituaiTcliiig over which had the inost j uioner mi il-iMisit i in ti liu-sii i.-h.l- I ----- - - - ' - - - , m , m mm m 'J. a B WW M.m iter tney .. had jawed each oliier awhile ami raised a crowd I hey' "went off to Ihe bank to -settle it. ami tlie last Ihe. crowd saw of them as they went down thy street they were shak ing tbcfi- ti si's and wagging "'.'their heads with great earnestness. Kan sas Cily Mo.). "Journal.' IILOO DLNKLVSPRtCT. 4 Ha Take HUtorlc Snap Shot t Ilrymn'a , - r Ally, Acalaitlda. i By William l. Anderson.) It lue presiit to you Mr. Bryau's prim-iiial witness, Jouaihau. He 1 to lie the future father of his country af ter M r. I irya 11 ami liis ex t rmml iua ry Congress have fixed up an lndeKud- ent Phiiipjiiue, republic ou ail expan sionist Momw doctriue. You say you1 don't know much j about him. There are others like you. The strangest thing Is 1hat M:. Bryan don't get time to y examine . thisi wituis . in his siMechfs. S we will let history,uu-deiiiabh- history, -outir 111 the testi mony. . . -guestkiu. rWhat i yimr nauieV Answer. "KDiIlfo ."t;Ilahlo., : "Wlnit Is your business at piesent?" ' "I am the gteat T.vcooii of Uh-'Phil ippine Islands now at war .with the United States to s'ure independence.! ; llHiesu't that sound very fine, Jona than?!' ' - .i - "How long have yon lieea engaged in tliis or similar business?" "For several years. rWbeiv were you Iu August, 17r "In, or nit her uear, Manila." "What were you doing there? j "1 was making ao luden-udent treaty wirh the Si'iaiiNh Captain Cem-raL "What did you get out of itr f Feur hundred thousand dollars, all m-.:. ..... . "Yes; free tra niorta thu to Hong I Ivoug w itli aoout forty of my f riemks." I "What wa your military or otht-r rank when loti azreeil to t 1 Kong and not come blki to tlie Is-1 amis; . . .tl . ... 1 "Yillage Couitnander; about equal to ! WW -- . m - . M who trwes to jw Denies .AU. cThls Is as time ofthespend- thrift Of health aS. Of the master Of money. Do not f ' - 1 " - V r.r ft ! WA5f.C yvvr ncaua oy HUViV- j fig yOtlf Bldod . to COTt- f !. V fa. , r -' : - r -1 jr vwatusc wu ciiru-Ji u uy id.K J fag , Jq q J s S&rsaparilta., 1 .' ..'"" ix v x WT J' A I Uyspepsia . My twsbtntt doctertd V time, for dyspepsU ttuith fonly tern- I Jrj" "T" ,n irsi ooiue oj nooo M I Aarsj.pjtnaa. helped nd the second eared htnu , M ; eared . my sick ; headaches. I &vu &tfj A , CUrKl Wibnktgicn,- J 9. Hondl mis tmr Urrr Uta : th BtM4rrntfnr mm fij mthrtU to tk with fiood'i armpirfili an American Second Lieutenant.: . What was your rank when you went to see the American Consul fat Hong KongT "President of the Republic,, of t he 1 Philippines. - j -Was that 'In, the treaty or how did .h 4iaiien?" - . , "No; I "fixed it up In a Hong Kong Itoarding house with the: other patriots who came with me to 'heir cash tlie check we got from a Manila, bank for the silver. 3 t . . ; , ...... IIow did you fix it uj to ,be Presi- deiltr " '. f' - ."I.; I. was best fitted for the place and I appointed Agonciilo, Secretary of "How many people were you Presi dent of r I "About ten millions.' "l'ou ha not liejird anything from Mr. P.ryau theu aliou-t .thc coHsnit of the goveriHil?' " No: tliat came k-iter." f'- '1 H you mean you forgo! it, or sent to the islands for it No; we isst polled it or assumed it; that Was allthe same." Are you a prophet as well as I'resideutr'; ' i - Noj.wliy do you ask?' "To Jesirn whether you foresaw the results of the approaching: war Jie- tween the -United if rates and Siiaiu. "Then why and ' fttr-trhat did vou visit tlie' American CousuJ at Hou Kongr .'-'- f, : i.i. That was-for -profit. I propositlto buck up with hint aud kire you Ma nila aud Cavile .aud . tlie.ieveuues to your Uncle ffani if he would help im go Iwick and get my 'conseut of the overaed In gooil sliajie, .. : i ,"tWas not yon r . treaty .with, Spain in tne way , or such a profitable seueiirey No; -1 hare ; learueil ?sincel from Bryan that a treaty with aliens should not prevent friends from making ' a 4jt.aj w-Ith a friend to break it:: What, did you Joi in 1,SJ(SV" I went. to SiugaSre ami made 'au other-deal with 4he Spanish fJeneral of Manila to divide some money coi the toll for cattle iwssiil by oar' two signatures through the. Spanish lines." "Did you tell the American Consul at Siuga -sire what you were doing V" "No; .what do you take me for?' "I was thinking you wen the Presi- cjit of Ih? Philippine republic about that .time. "So I was," "And you had not theii heard j Mr. I-ryan's remarks alndit loving ;onr enemies 'f 'No; I' vvas helping to feed the ene mies of both my, people und. the Ainerh-aus for sjnt cash. ' ' -' "How did yoif net into tliis Manila muss witli the American people?". " "I went there to accept from lHwey the fruits of America 11 victoryj" f Don't you think, Jon a lit a 11. It would naturally lie an extraordinary session of Congress that would' meet to smash treaths iu Is-half of - the extra -ordin ary character of sm h a rcprescnt.-rtive of K'ople n-jilyi-for liideMnfleiiei on Ihe principle of the "CONSENT; OF THE tiOl KKXKliT SCOTT'S -EMULSION of cod-liver oil is the means of life, and enjoyment of life to thousands: men -women and children. I ' '. , -... ! ' ' ' ' When ajjpetitc fails, it. re stores it. ;vhcr. food is a burden, it lifts the burden. When you lose flesh, it brings the plumpness of health. W hen work 1 is hard and duty s avy it makes life L . , J nn. ongllt; It IS thq thin Cfjce of the Xll,jtt. tUtUU 1 t 1 wedge; the thick; end is food. But what IS the nse' of food, wh" -u ? it. and can't di Scs iCOtt S emiiUinn r.f i:t,01. ,;i :c 4k r ' t.L ",v ia V,T" u,tt HiaKCS YOU tortTCt VOUr Stomach- j ..... . I u mi T IHIK ID WT..U ( utc COTT & BOWNE, 40, Ttul uee, New Ywk A CI RAN TEACHER'S ENGLISH. The intelligent struggles of the Co ban teachers with English have fur nished ns with a good ! many pretty stories. One day not long ago the teachers were Invited to some sort of an evening function at the I.ongfellow house on Brattle street. It happened that nbortly before the hour fo rthe assembly some ladies who were In fron , of tha t house .were politely . ap proacheil by a group of male Cuban teachers, who. with their hats In their hands, stood bowing, ; If you please, dear. inada ins, said their siiokesmau. "we are invited at this house tonight. We wish to ' at tend. We were Isen 011 an excursion to the distance. -and have not the time to go to our house. Ho that we wear, as you pei. out lay dress. , Perhaps you can 1H1 ns if It would ls iHrmit ted 'to us to go to tilt ri"cet ion in our day lress? If it would not. tlieu ivr tainly shall we take tlie time to g! 5o oer bouse and put 011 'our night 4lress! Tlie ladies asuitsl them "that Ihey wotild do much Ictter to go ts they were than to mt on their night ilrss. and they lioweff gravely and grateful ly and withdrew. ltosoii Transcript. SHEEP ATE THE FLIES. SuiK'rvisor Tom I. Smith of Ursa has something to rejiort . that may prove of Interest to faniHTs ami jwr haps every ldy else. He had forty acres of his farm in wheat, -'and .when it. looked as if the Hessian fly had ruined it he turnel the tract over to bis sheep for pasture. They nibbled It down tin til jt looked as If 110 -wheat was left. Wheu tlie sheep were taken out. tlie grain took fresh liold and duly came to a bead. Now the "handsome xuiicrvisor has just finished thrash ing tlie yield of forty, acres and. finds himself ju osscssion of l.ixxi bushels of as pretty wheat as was ever raised inSthe country, lie. saj's. it's just. like fiud-iug H- He 1 wile res .that the flies were destroyed by 'the .sheep and the roots ..theu took - fresh bold-TQuhiey tlll.) Ilerajtl. . ti . 1, )'" SIBERIAN RAILROAD. Special trains on, the .iberjau rail road eerlainly imssess. everything for Ihe) comfort of-travelers. There Is a library, piano, writing conveniences, barber shop, gymnasium, ice water. hot water, dials which idicate the uext station and the length of the stop, double windows to protect tlie passen gers" from dust and the extreme Sibe rian cold, and an observation car at the rear. There Is no charge for med icalattendance, but baths cost $1. There are attendants on the train siicnking English, French and tier- man. The time from St. to Irkutsk M seveu days. Petersburg WORKING FOR THE UNION BEL. LA- Thtfe are nine branches, in New York slate of the Women's . Interna tional I'ihor league, whose object ,is to persuade working men ami women to-buy only goods bearing the union label. ' ; . " i fa.m ir pathway. Dean Farri fa rw)ll '"ifel fvT'" rTde'iill eatfiVai of Hk' .t ha Buuv.114 at 'tlie jchHlle window"' . I11 i ..the . Cudlegiate, chivcli. cf St, Mary. ' Sontnwark. londcfn. 011 .Michaelmas day. iThis. niemorlab -liiis ih'vu erected IiT money .contributed bv in I-elialf-of-ur In nietnory of youugJ folk. v-'yv-v . ... i j RAIN AND SNOW FALL. The average animal ' total of water whicli falls as rain or snow in I lie I'nitI States is 1.407 cubic miles. This amount of raltiwould niore than twice, till Lake Ontario. To raise this water the clouds from which It fell would require the work of ." tUH kmnni horses working ten Lours a day tliroughoiit tlie year. OUTCLASSED. Footpad - Freddy What are you looking so bine alsiut. pard? Sandbag Siiininy Aw, 1.1 bought I was juirty gisid iiKinj' line; but 1 read in a : I ook yestenlay alnnit a guy named Atlas -what held tqi tie whole WHirld.--Baltimore . America u. - - HAD HIS DOt'BTS. When you are tempted to ! Is iiafighty, Jcdiuny. you must say, '(let tliee; lMhind tne, Satan. . "Huhl N let., de old feller git right inde push? No 'ndeeily: d rather have ni In front..' where '.1 c"n keep in eye oii-Ilm'I'lilladelphia Bullet lu. SOMEBODY TO FALL BACK ON. --.- '- i - "Dickie. T hated to, whip you. but you are so liad I had tot" v "Well. iMver uiin' ma: when uran- 111,1 rtum'f, an I tell her iroiit it. you II Ik sorrier'n 'y are now." lu diauajHis JotiruaL l'OLLIXtJ PLACID r i There will Ik Zfl fHilHus places in the t'realer New York this year. Ther an tAs:; in Neliraska ami 111.1 Ui Nortli Carolina. . HAIR DYIN'ti. A New York i druggist said rei-ently that, according' to his exjwrioiice. tneti use hair dyes to a tniicli greater extent tiiau women. ' Edgar: "Mis VAt. I-h have -something most 1iiisrtant to ask you. way i tiiac is -" lith isoftlyi: "What is W. Ivlgar?" Eilgar. "May I Edie. would ymi Ih williusr to have our names printed in tlie irapers with a hyphen NtHWur When their daughter are infants mothers are anxious to keet niat hes out of tlieir reach: to put matches within their reach is their greatest anxiety wuieu their daughters are older. Doctor: "Your wife Is rery UL and I hare my doubts as to her recovery.'' Husband: "Oh. she'll pull through all right. Her dressmaker sent hooie a new gown yesterday, aud she hasn't trleil It on. Johutiy Paw, what Is higlser crit! clsm? ' " " ' ; I'aw It is something that is able to remove all the heat f mm the here after, but. is not so successful with the present Dal tiutoie America u. f ' ' " ' - ' - - Sleep, O gentle sleep, how have I frlffhtemsl tliee?. asks the distracted King In Shakespeare's play of "Henry IV." and It is a question which thous ands of weary mortals both before and after that sovereign's tiiii ehave been iu the habit of frauiiujr. though no 'answer, has been forthcoming. That several ingenious ihtsoiis hare, however, solretbthe problem of induc ing , sleep the following ieculiar uietlt oils of counteracting insomnia will, says Tit-Kits, clearly demonstrate: ' " His Imiierlal Majesty the. Shah of Persia was a martyr to insomnia for a long time until, in a happy moment of inspiration, one of the court physi cians, lilt upon the extraordinary no tion of patting the autocrat ion tlie arms and: lck until sleep weighed clown his eyelids. So admirahht was this siHH-mic foiuid to le that tr w iuuncdiately adopted'by the Shall, and it Is statetl that the suite which ac companied him to - IhirojH contains!, amoug other functionaries, two "pat ' tcis," whose sole occupation touk tile form of helping to -send their master luto the realms of-; the drowsy Ior pheus. .--' -i " - . 'At the Paris Expisit ion there 5s shown the model f n cave'om-e iM-eii-piel by a famous I'reek brigand, who was iu the habit of beiug M-nt ' sleep by tlie dropping of pieeH of gold .-.from the roof of tlie cave on .i canst' be oca th. The gold thus ib-..i-jnhI ieprsented some of the Ihhi'v that he had acquired from passin-; tiavellers. and so dear had Ihe sound of coin become to him that uothin but iis chink upon tlie ground would soothe his eyelids ! to sleep, of nil .'-j queer methods of Inducing drowsinrs". t1:e foregoing would : certainly swm to-Ik Ihe queerest. ; , . A gentleman w ho resiihil for iiinii.v years in the town of Worcester, was unable to drop .oft" lo sleep unless In If a dozen jM-aches were placinl under -hi's , pillow, as he averred that tlie fume of the fruit brought with It A Vertaiu degree of drowsine.ss. ; . - Soniewlui. similar to tlie device .of. tills worth.v wa the plan of a I'.iri slan, lyervhant whose uly remedy for sletilssness was: tlie insertion neatli his pillow of a sachet of hivvn- . tier,", the .smell of ..which, lie declared.. wouki send him lo sleep 4 11 less tSciu five minutes. r Very pe-iilkir was tlie following: A middle agiNl engim-cr who h:ul lived for lilany years close to tlie Is-ach of a seaside town had growh so aiciis toiueil to the lullaby of the waves tii.it when business tiKk him to Manchester where lu 'was thenceforward com lielled to live, he found that the ab sence of tin sea iiiurmurs rotilssl hiiu of sheL He therefore litteil up in his iN-dchamlier an apparatus whii-h was so cfjiistructed that , the sound of Ihe waves as they broke mum tin shore .was; most clevi Atdd by this fictitious rly iniitatrd. appliam-e the engineer was c-nableil to sleep perfect Ir, and the apparatus -oni inued !n constant use until tin' day of ids d'-nth some years I.-iter. .' . . . Tn sortie Oriental cliijiies "the u.iiivj who find theinselves jtnalile 't .slei-pf by natural iueans 'pielvail iiikVii flii'Hr frieiuls 'io adinlnisier jto theVn Very sound tlogJus Avlth ' bamboij't'caiies.! Tlie pain thus sustained isrfliitujsed I by' fhe'liallves fii qestfoh to' iiu'luc a sensation of drowsiness, followiil Jy sle'p. All the same, there' i V". ' few'. liioinnI.i patients in this cimnli j who voidd resort to so' clra st h 'Jt' jm-ii sure for c iirjug Ihcu' c-oiupl-iint. !'. "' 1 FLIC I IT OF THE CAKKIEIt THi EON. The rrier plgiHin when I ra veling feed. If the diwIsHiis ,m! loiiy; it Mies on without stopping to take nutriment and at last arrives thin." exhausted, aud almost dying. If corn Ik rrcsciited to It it refuses to eat. content u ilscir with drinkiug a IlMle water 11 ml then.." 1 shipping. .Two or tiiri'e hours later it Is-gtns to ea t with great modern 1 11 i and sleeps avaln liniiniluileiy artcr ward. If its ttiglit has. Ihs-ii very' pro-' . longed 11k jigoir will proeicd lu this ur;iiiner for iorty-eiglrt hours Is-ioie ricovcrfug its normal mode of feeding: - REFERRED TO I'APA. Ma ui ina Now gi and say night to jiMir goveriM'ss, like a go-id gis'id I i 1 1 "b - giiL and give lir a kiss. Utile Pnss I'll sjiy good night. 'but. I wont gEe her a kiss. I Ma miiMi That's naughty! Why won't. you give her a kiss? Little Puss Iteeja use she slaps peo ple's fa"C when they fry to kiss her. Mamma Now, don't talk uonciic., but iii as" you're told. l'tlle Puss r-Well. luumiiiy. If yon don't Ixdievi me, ask papa!- IiiI"iii I'unclu ' LA Rt JEST EYED ANIMALS. Horses, giraCTes, and osf riches have larger eyes than any other creatures. An irishman, having k-cii a rraisiied aint couvicteil iimii full and uiimist iU a ble ty idem -e of some flagrant inil; iiieaunir. 1shrg askcsl if he liad ltny thing to say for himself, replkil wiJ'a tin vl(anictcrlslte "hitinof of his coun try: L - ;':'-- . "--'iii "Nevpr a single wird, your -"honor!. And It's my mil opinion. there's Iri-!,.-. a. great deal too much said as It is." ' Max O'Rell has Im-cii ill hi ''aris en! has I Ken forced to eam-el .nanr of his engagements for lectures and nl dn'sses.; The distinguished I'reti ! man tin pfi rale life tlie is known as Paul Blouet) is 'couteiiiplatitig retiring frorin the platform and devoting him self. when his health iktiii'is even liiat iiimh effort, fo -pundy literary work, i .':'..: M , TrlO . : . . CLEASINa AND IIGALJ.NO , CURE FOR CATARRH CATARRH mm is ru: r. o.t-1 .v a a i 11 j s iiutii Ddim v J Ey nii4 i1iiiou lo nn, i Cintnln no in P iinl kly hMrbr4. LaWZX It relief at once. 'A,wi llopcnrnnd drayae u, V.,' .. luflfMm firitg- it. utiniMHnrii. . nini.i4Piri Ail7inrimlion. 'ftJUU ' 1 i tn Ilet-ls and Protects th Membran. l;i-aurt the, frf iifea of Tustand BmI Lafpe Hlxtf, &r cent at Druggrlftii "t1 by umll. Trial Ip, 19 int by Mmt '-. KLT BKOTHBKS.'M Wtrrta 8tr"t, Xw Yoik. - ' ." 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