EGAP VI
XXI SEPTEMBER, Ml Ml XVII
KRAZ Y DAYS SECTION—JOURNAL (THE GATE CITY)
Tails of Woo
Jest Jokes
Sabina Walker
Harold’s
Chevron
I'm not one of the Smith Bros.
But when your car has a cough
I'm Here with Chevron Gasolin
The water we add to our gas
is pure carbonated and will
not rust in your tank!
o
INVITE US TO YOUR
NEXT BLOW-OUT
We have
given many a flat tire the airl
HAROLD
KASSMAN
_
nyso ^= o N station
WE REPAIR
ALL AILING AUTOS!
Beat Up Buicks
Conked Out Chev's
Down in the Dump Dodges
Failing Fords
Pooped Plymouths
Puney Pontiacs
Continued from page 3
Manager (returning sud
denly): ’What are you doing
with your feet up on the desk ”
Resourceful Clerk: *1 have
been too busy to look for an
eraser, so I’ve had to use my
rubber heels.’
She had begged her husband
for months to have his pic
ture taken.
At last he de
cided to go through th agony
and made the appointment with
the photographer. But when the
proofs arrived, his wife ex
claimed in horror, ‘Oh. there’s
only one button on your coat!’
Thank heavens,’
he said,
'you’ve noticed it at last.’
Customer: ‘Tell me honestly
now , is there any real surefire
cure for dandruff’.”
Barber:
‘Oh, yes, indeed!
It’s an application invented by
a Frenchman named Guillotine.’
When a certain young man
grew tired of working for
others, he went into business
for himself.
Later a friend
asked him how it was to be his
own boss.
'1 don’t know,’ he replied.
‘The police won’t let me park in
front of my own place of busi
ness; tax collectors tell me how
to keep my books; my banker
tells me how much balance I
must maintain, freight agents
tell me how my goods must be
packed, customers tell me how
my goods must be made; fed
eral, state, county and local
agencies tell me how to keep re
cords; the union tells me who I
can work, and how, and when;
and on top of all that, I just
went broke!’
A pedestrian was waiting to
cross the street when a huge
Saint Bernard dog came by and
knocked him into the street. As
he was trying to get up a small
foreign car came by and ran
over him. A passer-by rushed
up and asked him if he was
hurt.
The man replied, ‘I didn’t
mind when that dog knocked
me over, but that tin can tied
to his tail nearly killed me.’
-----------o----------
Automatic Transmissions
are Our Specialty!
MITCHELL’S
Auto & Truck Repair
711 Park Ave.,
Ph. 372-3427
Nyssa
A farmer harvested some
popcorn and hauled it to town
with his mule team. The sun was
so hot, heunhitchedthemulesto
feed them. When he returned
from lunch the corn started to
pop. The mules thcught it was
snowing, and they frote to death.
*»»»»*»»»•♦»«»»»
of their quilts when they make
their beds.
Knowing these conditions, we
decided he was acting tinder
natural causes. Later we found
h< was trying to imitate a go
at us. A sheepherder can lose
several marbles and still be a
good sheepherder, but it lie
loses too many, he has to tie
taken away from the sheep and
given some job that does not
require thinking, such as punch
ing cows, teaching school or
best of all, being elected to
congress.
There were many more such
incidents, but they all happened
long before we were in the
eighth grade, but knowing many
of these ‘jokers’ of long ago, no
one can say for sure what he
would do if they started working
on him, regardless of his age.
♦-O-A-*-OULU-*
MESSAGE EX TWILIGAT ZONE!
appeared. It was not impossible
to come down, but it was quite
painful.
.And then there was the story
of the “side hill go at us”. They
could only run around a hill,
as the legs on one side were
longer than on the other. The
trouble was that some of them
had long right legs and some
had long left legs, so you
could not tell which way they
would come around the hill.
The only escape from them
was to run up the hill. We were
cautioned that if we heard
any strange noises we should
start running up.
We did hear a strange noise
and investigated. It was a sheep
herder under a rimrock, making
a very wierd noise. Sheeptierd-
ers are supposed to be shy
a few marbles which they lose by
Generally speaking a woman
trying to tell the long way is generally speaking.
WHERE ALL EMPLOYEES ARE CRAZY
where the man
The time for reckoning hat com« —
agement feels he should reveal the correct names of
employett —at thown on payroll recordt.
WEST END EMPLOYEES
"Gravel Gertie” - Known as Doris Hammon
"Loopin' Loma" - Known as Lorraine Bockstead
"Sitting Bull" - The fat Bob Hedges
IN CENTER OF BUILDING
(In their appropriate cages )
Mary, With Her Little Lamb" - Combs
Helen "The Dipper" Keep
Mary, "The Flipper" - Harris
LET US REAP
Don, "The Grand Cuisine” - Baxter
all lheeeeeeeeee
IN THE FRONT
SPOTS and RINKLES
"Gabby" - Margie Phillips
an¿ ullllllll ave
Kitty, "The Ripper" Grunig
Gaylone, "The Sleek One" Griffin
IMMMACULAT KLOTHES
"Gorgeous"
to keep you all lookin'
Dolly lioms
Carolyn, "The Gracious Ono" - Cooper
Betty, "The Intelligent One" - Orr
Your vERRy BesT
AND, OF
COURSE POOR, LEAN FRED
(All of us are suffering from shattered nerves, tanglad
LUCKY NUMBER??
minds
Match Our Posted Number
With That on the Krazy Daze
Section of the Journal and Git—
from the abuse of
Jennie
Bennett —But —on Crazy Day, Sept. 23
WELL OFFER
SPECIALS (Utual Ouality)
at from $1.26 to 99<
5 BUCKS IN KLEENIN'
PLUS 25
. . . and we ain't got any problems—
so cry with us about yours I I
CHICKEN
DINNERS
AS LISTED ON MENU TO ALL
WHOSE
PAPERS
Gait Sity Kleenors
Be bold in what you stand for,
but be careful what you fall for.
Big Bott "Squaw"
NUMBERED
LUCKY
MATCH
OUR
NUMBERS!
NYSSA . . . OREGON
5 TUBE
Time to winterize
£¥¥¥¥¥¥<¥
I VITAMIN ‘C’
79C
250 MG. BOTTLE OF 100
TRIAMINIC
*1.19
COLD TABLETS REG. $1.69
Ó
MYADEC
I
*6.47
BOTTLE OF 100 PLUS 30 FREE
BAYER
’ ASPRIN
*
30^ OFF
SWINGER
cig. liters
By Polaroid
$1.59
REG. $2.19 300 TABLET BOTTLE
wrist watches
Milk of Magnesia
ALARM CLOCKS
Bradley
ROLLERS
PKG. REG. $1
REG. $1.19 MINT OR REG.
REG. OR PINE SCENTED
XO<
REG. 99?
CONTAC
COLD TABLETS REG. $1.49
99<
B
1
At Your Service
RADIOS
HARE RUTTING SET
$ 7 99
lo
49<t
SUDDEN
BEUTY
REG. $1.07
(
SI 77<
Lanolin Plus Shampoo
DANDRUFF KONTROL
OR CASTILE
pt . size
ELEKTRIK
15 PIECE
reg . $5.95
88<
| LYSOL LIQUID
M
$1ßKK
I
WATCH BANDS
1 /2 Price
PHILLIPS
*7
$895
“MOD”
AT MIKES
TRAVEL
V VITAMINS
vfz
ZIPPO
MEET THE
46*
POLAROID FILM
TYPE 48 COLOR
$4.19
TYPE 47 BLACK & WHITE
$1.96
RADIO
With Hi-intensity
Lamp
REG. $34.95
S2395
WHAT’S A SHIMMIE?
Slithery
Slimy
Only
REG. $1.29
99'
— DAILY —
8r00 «. as. to 8t00 p. as.
WALKIE TALKEZE
*13B8or $22
PROFESSIONAL
MODEL
PHARMACY
2 ONLY
nr
HARE
DRIERS FREE
|
WINTERIZING KITZ *
PAYS
• Prescriptions
• Cosmetics
• Photo Finishing
vZO.YO
UNIVERSAL
— SUNDAY —
12 Noon to 5:00 p. m.
202 Main Street
Nyssa, Oregon
Phone 372-3347
*
OSTER HARE DRIER
• Sundry Gifts
• Veterinary
Supplies
AT CHUCKS PILL BOX
$3.00 VALUE
GOLD STRIKE
STAMPS
—with
Every Purchase !
I