TILLAMOOK HEADLIGHT
..
Scraps of Papa.
. 1
1 .'LT
■
■' TS
In the next Democratic national con
vention golg to be triplets?
and partisan basis. It is time to de
mand an accounting of the steward
ship. It la the duty of the Republican
Corgreas to make and enforce that
demand. The fear that it will do so
is doubUese accountable, in part, for
j the refusal to call Congress together
despite the declared publicity neces
sary. But come early or come late, it
is the duty of Congress to go to the
bottom in these matters, fix the
blame and suggest the punishment.
Do Preaident Wilson and Secretary
Baker imagine that they have the
right to tell a delegation of Fllipinoe
that this country intends to with
draw its authority from the Philip
pine Islands? Do they not know that
decision of the future relationship of
the Philippines is in the hands of
’Congress that will not be dominated
by advocates of what McKinley call
ed the "scuttle policy?” What can
COAXING YOU TO SMILE.
they hope to accomplish by holdingg
up false hopes and making unauthor
Why She Waited.
One of the tunniest cases came be-
ized promises’ to representatives of
the Philippine Islands relative to in [ fore Judge White not so very long
dependence, except to stir up unrest ago. A negro had been arrested for
beating his wife and in the course of
Jn the islands?
I
the wife's testimony she admitted
At a meeting of the Teachers Un that he had beaten her many times
ion of New York City the board of before.
Education “was represented as ty j “But why didn't you have him ar-
rants, oppressors, a privileged class." rested yourself; why
did
‘
’’ ’ you
. J wait
Why, that’s exactly what the kids until neighbors got an officer to
say about the teachers! The glad come to your rescue," asked
time is coming when the question judge.
of whether the teachers spank the I "Well, yoah honor”, said
pupils, or the pupils spank the teach- , woman, "I done think of it several
er. Is going to be settled by a school times, but I aint neber had enuff
money all together at one time to
Moses got the ten commandments referendum.
on Mt. Sinai. Joseph Smith dug up
pay his fine.”
The Cleveland Plain Dealer is not
the Boos of Mormon in New York,
-------o-------
and the reverent administration or alone in holding to the amusing
The Last Straw.
gan, the Springfield Republican, theory that the way to end "parti
One night —or morning, rather—
says that Lloyd George gave out sanship ' is for every American citi Mr. Brown returned Just as dawn
about all of the fourteen points but zen to let Woodrow Wilson and the was breaking.
the now misplaced freedom of the Democratic party to do his thinking
"What time is it?” called
seas doctrine three days before Mr. for him.
sleepy spouse.
| “A quarter to eleven my dear,” re
Wilson announced them in Congress,
At the close of the war the War plied Mr. Brown.
when as Ambassador and Official
reported, had
Eulogist George Herró says, “the Department, It is
His wife switched on a light and
Senate rostrum became as God's eighteen curry combs on hand: A looked at an alarm clock that stood
flaming altar." But, as has before curry comb lasts several years, and near her bed. It showed twenty min
been remarked in this paper, some the government had less than a mil utes past four.
people think the fourteen points are lion horses and mules. It Is too bad
She took her husband to task;
Holy Writ, and some consider them the war department has so much where-upon he put on his hat and
success in acquiring curry combs started out in a dignified manner.
wholly lot.
than in procuring airplanes and
"Where are you going?” she asked,
Ray Stannard Baker has succeeded heavy attillery.
i "I am going away,” he replied—
George Creel as the administrations
"away never to return! When things
The Presidential press agents are have come to suefi a pass in this
press agent in Paris, George having
come home to keep the propaganda now busy making it equally clear house that you, the wife of my
machine going in the United States, that the threat that Mr. Wilson bosom, will rather believe an ordi
The way to make a professional would pick up his doll rags and go nary, tin, half dollar alarm clock in
muck rafter begin to squirt perfum- home was unauthorized, and also stead of your loving husband, it is
ery Is to put him on the public pay that the clever ruse of our diplomat time I left for parts unknown.
roll.
ic representatives at Paris was re
------- o-------
sponsible for forcing Clemenceau to
The First Motor Van.
The friends of the administration the Wilson terms.
An ancient motor van usually man
who propose that instead of calling
aged to have a break down about
------ o-----
Congress into session President Wil
Thank God for Burleson, he has once a week and generally at a most
son call to begin a self-constituted killed the government ownership inopportune moment In the thick of
or Presidentially appointed soviet, movement. The fellow who gets up traffic. One day, after slowly snort
hand picked from various classes, to in future and 4alks about how the ing its way right Into the middle of
map out the reconstruction program, government could run anything at traffic, there was a sudden whirring
evidently proceed on the theory that less cost with better service will of wheels, a loud snap, and - the
the country Is ready for the bolshev- draw a vegetable shower every time. . weary and worn frame work came to
ist system.
------- o—
a dead stop.
------- o-------
Some time ago George Creel an- | "Look here,” said the policeman
After having had complete control nounced that he was going to de .on duty to the driver, “this Infernal
of the government for six years and louse public life, but at last accounts ■ thing is always breaking down. Let’s
falling to give the Phlliplnos inde he was still drawing his official see; what’s your number. Yes 1599.”
pendence In accordance with the salary.
“Darn!” came from the youth who
platform pledges while they had the
------- o-------
was In charge of the vehicle imme
opportulty to do it, administration
Every few days some leader of the diately behind. “That ain’t its num
leaders are now promising the Fili National Woman Suffrage Associa- ber; that's the year it was built.”
pinos early action by a Republican tlon sends President Wilson a mes-
------- o------
Congress, although the Republicans sage thanking him for what he has
A Sillier Sone.
never have hauled down the flag. done for suffrage. What he has done
An Italian soldier, wno had been
Quite characteristically Wilsonian. for suffrage, of course, still remains captured by the Austrians, was sing
Isn’t it?
quite a mystery to most pecple.
ing the Italian national anthem as
------- o
------- o-------
' he worked. An Austrian officer came
The Democratic national platform
A majority of the Democrats in the up tp him and said with an Austrian
plank against ’government by ln- House voted against an increase in sneer:
Juctlon" has at lust had attention at soldiers’ pay when the war was on.
"Can’t you think of a sillier song
the hands of the administration. but under Champ Clark’s lead they than that?”
Post master General Burleson has are loudly demanding "Justice’’ tor
The Itulian started furiously at the
been getting injunctions agaisl state the soldier now that they are out of Austrian, but caught himself. His
governments which have attempted power and the war is over.
rage cooled—or seemed to cool—and
to prevent the administration’s 20
he smiled.
per cent Increase in telegraph tolls.
"Certainly. I know a sillier song
A Little Matter of Fifty-Seven
------- •-------
than that," he said softly. "Would
Billions.
One of the best Instances of retrib
you like to hear it?”
utive Justice In history is the case of
And he began to sing the Austrian
The Sixty-fifth Congress appro
the muck raking and hammer weild- priated fifty-seven billion .dollars. national anthem.
Ing magazines, who kept up the ywap The Fifty-first Congress, which was
------- o-------
against the Republican party until denounced by Democratic politicians
The Choir Got Even.
until they got a Democratic Con as "the billion dollar Congress,” ap
Once in a while the choirs get back
gress, and (he Democratic Congress propriated 11,035,686,921. The war at the minister. In a Connecticut
gave the magazines the zone rate of lasted nineteen months. If it had church the other Sunday morning
postage! Moral: Don’t yell too loud lasted four years It is evident that the choir had sung its anthem, as
for reform; you might get it.
the*l’nited States would have been his text. "Now when the uproar had
------- o *•
"busted", for the money spending ceased." The singers bided their
Lloyd George complains that while was Just getting well under way time patiently and, when the ser-
the peace conference has been on. when th ■ armistice was signed, and mon was over, rose and rendered in
intruders have been hanging around the outlay has been Increased even most melodious
fashion another
the keyhole. What has a keyhole got though the war is over, from the anthem beginning. "Now is the
to do with "open covenants openly mere momentum of the spending high time to awake after sleep."
arrived at.’ ’
habit.
------- o-------
■—- ■ o
"Where are you going John?"
Congress has power to investigate
Evidently
the bolshevik!, who the expenditures made under these
-“To raise the wind."
have started out to purchase recogni vast appropriations, granted with
"What for?"
tion from the United States with con out question by the law making
’To meet a draft.’
cessions for certain private Anierl- branch of the government at the de
can interests evidently believe all
Soldiers Held to "Suap" Wilsons.
mand of the executive branch, under
the mean things Woodrow Wilson
~■ O
the spar of war emergency. The peo
said about our commercialized poli-
The needB of the President and his
ple have a right to a full accounting.
tics and public life In his "New
They demand it. They do not be peacy party in the way of photog
Freedom."
grudge a penny of the legitimate ex raphy have aroused some little com
-------o-------
penditure; they want the responsi ment in Washington since Senator
If they keep on killing General bility fixed for every item which rep Poindexter, of Washington, has made
Zapata the man will soon be as dead resents waste or worse.
public a letter from an enlisted man
ns Villa.
A great hullaballoo Is now being in the army photography section,
— ■ o
raised by Democratic politicians over stationed at Paris, who says that
The friends of the administration "world pioblems.” .They are manl- something more than 81,000 prints
who are trying to repudiate Post festily anxious tochange the subject. of the President and his party al
master General Burleson should not They are now
vigorously pre ready have been made.
overlook the fact that the distin senting the thought that In the midst
The soldier in question complains
guished Texan is one of the main of such an emergency as we now face bitterly against being held in Paris,
props and pillars of the Wilson cab it would bo wrong to rake up the together with 274 other enlisted men
inet and that It Is Inconceivable that "old Issues" of the war period. But solely to take pictures of Mr. and
he did any of the
drastic things the statute of limitations lias not Mrs. Wilson and their party. He
the public Is complaining about »with been out of these expenditures either wants to come home, he says, and the
out the knowledge and consent of morally dr legally. This Democratic officers and men In the unit want to
the head of the administration.
demand to drop the subject may do likewise. In writing to Senator
awaken some echo In certain alleged Poindexter the soldier says:
When Attorney General Palmer Republican Quarters. The interests
"Major Griffin was the head pho
nnd former Senator Bailey have fin anxious to prevent any probing are tographer on the George Washington
ished their debate on "What is a large and Influential.
on her first trip. Under his supervis
Democrat?’’, we hope somebody will
"Open the books” and "turn the ion 300 negatives were made of the
Come forward with a reasonable ex rascals out." these were the Demo Presidental party on the way over.
planation of "Why la a Democrat?" cratic battle cries of an earlier day. When he landed in France sixteen
------ o-------
They have a peculiar timeliness now. copies of each negative were made.
nator Pomervne. of Ohio, la for the evidences of waste and worse This means 4,800 pictures.
n Into the breach as a Presl- are piled mountain high. The admin
"An enlisted man of the section
candldate by the admlnlstra- istration has turned a deaf ear to had to go with the party to England
n effort to head off the the voice of protest. It has refused to and Italy. From these trips were
]ox boom. Secretary Baker divide responsibility. It has Insisted brought back 560 negatives, from
ted of of having his hat upon running things on a peisonal which were made 17.000 prints. 900
■e Ohio’s favorite sons
• enlarge nents and 700 postcards.”
I
A Missouri Democrat who recently
delivered an address before the Ro-
tary Club, of Dallas, Texas, told hie
hearers that if any of them wanted
his youngest child to be able to say
he had ever seen a Democratic Pres
ident, he should take the bah« to
Washington and let him look at Mr.
Wilson before his present term ex
pires, because the chance would
never come again.
—o----------
No, Mr. Burleson isn't the whole
trouble with the telephone and tele
graph system, or Mr. McAdoo or
Mr. Hines with the railway system.
Increased rates and decreased service
to the people are the natural results
of politicalized bureaucracy. The
advocates of political ownership and
operation of everything and every
body are hunting around for goats.
That is. perhaps, why Mr. McAdoo
got out while the getting was good.
But thise men have done as well as
any other politician could do in po
liticalized industry.
MAY 8, 191».
When Hector was a pup
I
his kennel was big enough
I
But Heck grew up
When you built your house your fire insurance
was ample. But values have soared I
Figure what it will cost you to rebuild in case of
fire. Then you will realize what you stand to lose.
This agency can serve you in two ways—by giving
you greater protection and by helping you reduce the
chance of fire.
This second service is more vital to you than the
first. It has been developed by the Hartford Fire
Insurance Company and is available to all Hartford
policy holders. Let us explain it
ROLLIE W. WATSON, The Insurance Man
We write ALL KINDS of Insurance and give YOU SERVICE.
All Losses Promptly Adjusted and Promptly Paid.
Office
43J and^Mutual.
National^Bld.
Tillamook City, Oregon
Buy Tires of Known Quality
The steady usefulness of your car depends on good tires
Economy depends on good tires.
--------
.. Unit^d.State8 2re9
tire8’ That’S wh* we handle
them. Take no chances with unknown quality. Buy United
States Tires,
—for their proved dependability,
—for their oft demonstrated economy.
___ We «“ Provide you with United States Tires to meet your
needs exactly.
*
•»
United States Tires
ere Good Tires
"e Go®«* Tires. That’s whv we tell th#»
: Nelson 1 Co. ™v QtJ • MoU fcw H.b<e
AiOeiwn Bros., Gnnge, Nehalem; Wheeler Garage. M. J. Maddoi" W^°^.
rWe kBrWJJSted States