The Sale at the BOSTON STORE
will continue until everything is sold
A SENSE OF HUMOR.
BHMONÏ
FEED YARD
.lamoH B. Moore, Prop.
Opp. Martin Flouring Mill
Wood, PowtH, Shakos
llorsoH bourded by
the day, week or
month.
Fine livery teuniH
at reasonable rates
(irain and hay for
sale — |lay baled
or loose.
JI Few
Ulords Concerning
Good Printing
\f
Plush and Mohair Kobes
I regard n < n-.e of humor «« one of
tbe most pre io - i i gifts tlint can lie
vouchsafed to a bun m l*elng. He la
not necessarily a better man for hav
ing It, but I k * I h a happier one It
renders hit.i Indifferent to good or bud
fortune. It enables him to enjoy bis
own dlHcointitiire.
Blessed with this sense lie Is never
unduly clnted or cast down No on«*
cun ruffle bis teuqier. No abuse dis
turbs hl» equanimity. I! r. - do not
bor>* him. Humbugs <1 > not humbug
him. Holemn airs do not Imjxise on
him. Sentimental gush does not Inflti-
ence him. The follies of the moment
have no hold on him. Titles and dec
orations an* but childish baubles In
bls eyes. Prejudice does not warp
Ids Judgment. Ih* is n<*v<*r In conceit
or out of conceit with himself, lie
abhors nil dogmatism. The world Is a
stage on which actors «triit and fret
for hl» i-dlfl' Alon .¡i d amusement, and
In* pursues tin* even current of his
way, Invulnerable, doing what Is right
aud proper according to his lights, but
utterly Indifferent whether what bo
does finds approval or disapproval
from others
If Hamlet had had any wane of hu
mor be would not have been a nui-
Ham-e to himself and to all surround
ing him. Loudon Truth.
and Al! Kinds of Harness.
THEY MET AGAIN.
Why the Sporty Looking Chap Cut Hu
Vacation Short.
After tin* r|x>rty looking i Imp hnd
i bud br«*uLfast ut Un* little hotel In the
1 <'utxkllis, where lie lm<| eome for ¡1 few
weeka' viu-utlon, the old farmer who
ran the pluce culled him imide and
■u Id
•'1 understand ye gave my Iwy n llg
roll of money an' some Jewelry to put
■ In the xiife."
"Yea. I thought that was the beat
pluce fol them. Yoll don't mind keep
lug the stuff for me, do you?”
"Great mak«*a, no!" replied the farm
er uh lie rubbed liI m band« unit <huc
kl<*«l. "Tlie Imy »ays ye brung three
party heavy trunk» with ye”
"Yen; I alway» travel with plenty of
< lotliew, teuiil« racket», tixlilng tinea,
etc. You’ve no objection to ho much
baggage, have you?”
"Not u bit of It, air not a lilt of It!
1 I wish ye hud lining ‘leven or twelve
with ye. It’s kinder funny ye ain't
rocognlard me yet "
“No; I don't r«*m«*nil»*r to have ever
seen your face before," »aid the near
arrival
"Well, mobile tny whiskers lieu leetle
longer or stint bin*, but ye orter know
my voice 5Ve had quite a talk one
day In Noo York "
"In In New York?" stammere«! the
■porty looking ehup oh he tnrniHi pale.
“Yep Don't ye recollect ’bout ine
handin' ye fits) f-r that gold brick? I
knowed ye the niinnlt I »»«cn ye on the
wagon limt night. Hnukea. but that
wuh a moKt le-wtiful swindle ye work
ed on me. non!"
"W wliat tire you going to do about
•i r
"Oh. nutliin*. I never raise no fu*e
llhlcsH there's u good o< < axhun for it.
The Imy »ny» ye Jeat went wild over
the Hcenery cornin' up on the wagon,
an’ nieblie ye'd like to walk down to
the depot an' git some more vicwa on
tile way. The next train to the city
piiHxeM there at 'leven thirty, an' it ye
Hurt now, while I'm looklu’ fer the
«.-unstable. ye'll Jc**t ulmut ketch it.
An* don't do no worryin' 'bout that
cash of youm, non, ai I'll take the best
of care of It."
It wuh a ten mile wulk to the depot,
but when the 11 30 for New York came
along It carried away a footsore and
dtwty looking Individual, who »cowled
and muttered and shook 111» fist
through the ear window aa the train
Hturti*d off again. A. II. Iewia In
Judge.
Is
a
Poultry and Stock Food
and Harness Oil.
WILL HUMPHREY'S
HARNESS
D
One tirade “Chat tbe Best
Try us with your next order. We have the
latest styles of type and competent men to
execute the work in the latest approved style.
Poor Consolation.
THE
REPUBLICAN
PR1NTERY
• *
»•
SHOP
Opposite Exchange Stables
We are prepared to do BLACKSMITHING and
MACHINE WORK.
done promptly.
Repair Work of all kinds
We guarantee all our work to
be first class and at Satisfactory Prices.
BETWEEN
&th AND 7,A ON
WALNUT
EGIDU OF NINEVEH.
Ths Most Ancient Banking House of
Which We Have Record.
^o000000000-000 OOOOOOOOOOOO^
’ CASH MEA T MARKET ’
There was u kiud of public record
office attached to the palace aud tem
ple nt Nineveh. In which It was cus-
tomury to deposit Important legal and
other documents. su<-b ns contracts ?
and iigrcem.-nts for th«* purchase nnd
sule of pro[s-rty, marriage settlements, ?
wills, etc. Among these there were ?
discovere«! official statements us to the
history nnd transa* lions of the emi
nent banking bouse of Egtdu a: Nine
veh. Assyrian chronology prove« that
these refer to n date about 2.301 years
ls*fore the Christian era. when Abra
ham dwelt nt Ur of the Chaldees, as is
state«! In Genesis We may therefore
claim for this firm the reputation of
Icing the oldest bank In the World at
least <>f which we have Any recon! or
are likely to have. Th«* a«*counts are
very voluminous nnd cover tbe trans
actions of five gi*nerati<>us of the house
A
from father to son. The firm grew rap
idly In Importance during this jieriod,
during which they attained great
wealth, for they succeed«*,! in securing
from the king th«» appointment of col
A
lectors of taxes, a position which In
the east always leads to fortune. They
A
afterward farmed th«* revenue for sev
eral of the Assyrian provinces with
I very great gain to the firm.—T. P.'s
A Compromite.
A
In a Jury trial In a »mail town not London Weekly.
many tulle» from civilisation the rural
A
Corrected In Rhyme.
gentlemen Into whine hands the fate
Thackeray was much pestered by the
I <»f the plaintiff was placed wore an
i ttubliomly divide«! that they were sot»«* autograph hunter, says Holder in his
twenty odd bourn In reaching a ver "Recollections." lie disliked above all
dict. Aa they left the court, after re things to writ«* In nn nutograph album
A
turning their verdict, one of them was and often refused those who asked him
asked by a friend what the trouble to do so sotnetltn«*s rather brusquely.
On one occasion the owner of an al
was
"Waal," b*» «aid. “all of 'em wanted bum. a young lady, was fortunate.
to give the plaintiff >4,000, and six of Thackeray took her book to bls room
’em wanted to give him >3,000, so we tn order to look It over. Written on a
split the dlfferen<-e and gave him >500." page be fountl these lines:
—Woman's Home Companion.
Mount Blanc Is the monarch nt mountains.
ll) it ever occur to you that nine men
out of every ten judged your stand
ing in the commercial world by the
sationery you used? Such is a fact. |lf
you use cheap, shoddy printing, such as
many printing offices give you, devoid of
merit, then your correspondents will put
you down as a has-been and irresponsible.
GOOD PRINTING has been our motto for
years and in quality we refuse to1 be ex
celled. And our prices are right.
Phone 31
Pucoui Ci it and Helpt to
Lighten Life's Way.
It
?
5
?
Opposite Van Riper Bros. Phone 596
We deliver to any part of the citV'^^^^
I
?
?
Phone orders given careful and prompt attention.
We cut hams to accommodate customers
’ J. W. Hawxhurst, Prop. ?
r>r>r r; r>r: r>-r>r: r>r-
They crowned him long ago.
But who they got to put It on
Nobody seems to know.
Albert Smith.
Aunt I.uclndy was In deep distress
over tbe loss of her son Jim, and a
Under these lines Mr. Thackeray
neighbor sought to consol«« her. saying: wrote:
"Don't grieve for him. Aunt Lucindy
A HUMBLE SUGGESTION.
He lias gone to a land flowing with I know that Alb«*rt wrote in hurry—
milk and honey."
To criticise I scarce presume.
With a diauial countenance, tbe old But yet methinks that Lindley Murray
Instead ot "who'' had written "whom.”
darky replied:
W. M. Thackeray.
"Jim never did like milk, an* honey
always made him sick."—IJppincott’a.
Pliny’s Yarns.
Pliny's
yarns
about human anatomy
His First Banquet.
City Nephew But. Uncle Henry, you were something wonderful. He tells
left the banquet tabh* too early. You of a race of savage men whose feet
should huve waited for the bon mots are turned backward and of a race
known as Monocolt, who have only
aud 11 m * repartee.
Uncle Henry—Oh. don’t worry, bub. one leg. but are able to leap with sur
I was satisfied. You see, I don’t driQk prising agility. Tbe same people are
I also called tbe Sciapodae, tiecause they
nor amoke.—Iles Moines Register.
are in tbe habit of lying on their
backs during tbe extreme heat and
His Forte.
“Bragley tells me he's doing wonder protecting themselves from the sun by
ful work with his present employer. I tbe shade of their feet These people
didn't know he was particularly strong dwell not far from tbe Troglodytae, to
tbe west of whom again there are a
In business.”
"He Isn't. He's merely particularly tribe who are without necks and have
strong In talking about business."— their eyes In their shoulders.
Philadelphia Prose.
3
r> 0000 00*000*?
VAN RIPER’S
V
CHASE & SANBORN COFFEES
AND TEAS
(SEAL BRANDI
HAVE ARRIVED
S'
A WORD TO THE WISE IS SUFFICIENT
TRY THEM ONCE AND YOU WILL USE THEM
FOR THE REST OF YOUR DAYS
ST
Don’t forget about the barrel of salt mackerel
—Phone your order to 516—
VAN RIPER BROS.
I_______________________________
M ason & S lough
ABSTRACTERS
choice line of Invest
ments tlmt will moke
the fjnretmser money
Lands
Ranches
City Property
Farm Mortgages
MASON & SLOUGH
Clsvsr.
Mrs. Petter—Did you see that? Dix
on seised that rocking chair and was
“Mammy’s knlttin* dad a pair 4f Into It before his wife bnil a chance to
socks.”
roach It. And on his wedding trip too.
’’An’ what’s dad a-doln' of?"
Mr. Petter—That’s Just it. There’s
"Prayin’ to the I »rd for shoes!"— where Dixon Is smart. Nobody will
Atlanta Constitution.
siwpect that he is on his wedding
tonr. don’t yon see? And besides, ba
Making a Monkey of Him.
gtts tbe chair.—Boston Transcript
“1 have something to tell you. I have
a tale about my ancestors."
Anatomy.
"I presume your nneeatoiK had tails
"How
ninny
ribs
have yon, Johnny?"
■bout themselves." — Detroit Free
asked the teacher.
Press.
"I don’t know, ma’am,” glgghsl John
Nothing can be done nt once hastily ny. aquhanlng around on one foot.
Ttn so awful ticklish I never could
ami prudently.—Publius Syrus.
couut 'em."—Ladies' Home Journal.
"What's Dad A-doin’r
-i-
I
£
A
HOME
BAKERY
FRESH FRUITS. VEGETABLES,
DRESSED CHICKENS.
FRESH BREAD
HOHE
BAKERY
£