Klamath republican., May 23, 1901, Image 4

DYSPEPSIA
petite
»Per els prove I •••
®.l retain sad
“ I bare taken Hood's Sarsaparilla and
it has created a good appetite and cleanest
mj blood." A doli - h K hodb , Plattsmouth.
Nob.
•• My little brother bad no appetite. He
has taken Hood's Sarsaparilla and now
gets hungry like any other boy.” M aid
K iloobk , Alden, Kan.
Hood's Sarsaparilla promises to
cure and keeps the promise.
Mu Voiceless brief.
Tilets—Trvder looked very sad
when he heard that telephoning across
the ocean is possible.
Crustham—1 suppose he did, poor
fellow. It will be an unhappy day
for him when he cannot get beyond
the reach of his wife's voice.
A Low-Priced Worker.
A Jersey farmer visiting New York,
stcxal looking at a sign in a book store
window: “Dickens' Works All This
Week for Two Dollars.”
“Wall,’ he remarked, “my 'pinion
is that Dickens feller is either a
mighty poor workman or else he's
confounded hard up for a job.”
Our 1901 catalog contains a full list
of every thing needed for photographic
purposes. The fullest line of amateur
goods in the west.
Kirk, Geary <k
Co., 330 Sutter St, San Francisco.
Tactful.
Miss Withers (showing photograph
of herself)—I’m afraid it's rather
faded.
Binks (inexperienced, aged 19)—
Yes, but it's just like you.
This signature is- on every bos of tbe geouine
Laxative Bromo*Qutnine
Tabi.t®
l
!
. Blll M aoll •• I
besfan UUlM < AS‘
/s Sarsaparilla
Garfield Tea is the most used, the best
liked aud is the original herb tea for
tbe pure of eonstipation and sick headache.
It stregtbens the digestive organs.
||h.
Pul milk u*»i. *•»<» •* V"l**h*t * U*» Man h l
Hie blood, restores appetite,
.« vitality, vigor, tone—thia is
one of the reasons why it’s called the
Greatest Spring Medicine.
Take it.
The owners of automobiles in Ohio
constitute a new force in the good
roads movement.
There is a plan
now under way for the building of a
boulevard, from one end of the state
to the other, touching the cities and
largest towns.
7,'„u’*r
in Ila *or«t f«< 1 in
•on.
. the Spring, when
iocda cleansing, fails
ins the stimulus nec-
e proper performance
ions.
Boulevard to Cron Ohio.
ALUM IN FOOD
h ;» T.E MUSCLES I E AFFECTED
L0CCN1T0B ATAXIA.
A W»ll Known Ohio Cltlion <ur,d ot
This Stubb-,n Ailment Atl.r HI,
System Sr»med Hopelessly
Broken Down.
from the Xn*f, H'arrrty, OAio.
One day. at Burlington House, Ten­
nyson Is said to have asked the guests
a conundrum which he bad Just made:
“Who are the greatest women in the
world?“
The answer was:
“Miss
Ourt, the Misses Ippl and Sara Gosaa.”
W. S. Gilbert. of Gilbert and Sullivan
opera fame, was one day standing on
the steps of his club house In Loudou,
when s stranger approached and asked:
"Does a man belong to your club with
one eye named Walker?” "I don't
know,” was the answer; "what's the
name of his other eye?"
Arthur Simmons, the venerable negro
attendant at the White House, was dol­
ing In hla chair the other day. when an
usher rushed upstairs and said: “Man
down here wants to see Mr. Cortelyou.”
1 "Can’t see him,” replied Arthur, with
dignity. “But this man says he’s got
to see him ” Don't car« nothin* about
that." said Arthur, preparing to resume
bls dote; “nobody can see Secretary
Cortelyou: he's gone Into ids sanctum
sanitarium.”
Thomas Lincoln, tbe father of Abra­
ham Lincoln, was a great story-teller,
and one yarn that he never tired of re­
hearsing was a blood curdling Indian
tale. One day, when be was about
seven or eight years old. and living In
Kentucky, be was sitting on a fence,
watching hla father and older brothers
at work in the field. Without a mo­
ment's warning, a small band of In­
dians came rushing by on horseback.
One of them, with a sweep of hla long
arm, seized the lad and galloped off.
Little Tommy Lincoln looked up Into
tbe red warrior's face, and said: “Don’t
kill me. Take me a prisoner." The
Indian smiled.
Just then a rifle
cracked. Indian and boy tumb'e-1 off
the horse, tbe Indian dead, with a bul­
let in bls brain. Tommy Llncolu’a
brother had come to the rescue.
Once, when Mark Twain was to lec­
ture In a small Western town, he was
greeted at the railway station by the
minister, who was to be his host during
bls brief stay. On their way to the
parsonage, the minister asked If it
would be agreeable to Mark if be
opened the lecture with a prayer, as
was the custom. Of course tbe humor­
ist was delighted, and accordingly,
when they reached the hall that even­
ing, the minister left tbe lecturer sitting
In the comer of tbe platform, took the
center of the stage himself, and pro­
ceeded to offer a prayer about half an
hour long. In tbe course of which he
gave bls views on all tbe current affairs
of Interest an<J concluded by saying:
“And now, O Lord, we have with us to­
night a man who la known throughout
all the world as the great American
humorist. Help us. O Lord—help us to
understand what be is about to say to
us. and to be amused by It; and if pos­
sible. grant that we may derive tome
real benefit from bls lecture.”
Talking of tbe Inauguration of James
Buchanan. L. A. McCreary, of Wash
lngton, D. C., said: "The Kirkwood
House was crowded from ba-ement to
the roof, and tbe rush was so great that
store-rooms were used to make room
for the throng. One of these had no
window—only a door, and when a man
from Maine trudged In at midnight ot
March 34, be was very glad Indeed to
take the only thing left—the window­
less store-room.
On the morning of I
March Sth, tbe man from Maine ap <
peared as the desk and wanted to know
when tbe ceremonies were to take
place, ‘Ceremonies?* asked the clerk;
‘what do you mean?* ‘Why,’ said the
man. ‘the Inauguration.’ The clerk
thought he was mentally unbalanced,
and eyed him suspiciously, until be ex­
claimed: T was awake half a dozen
times, but didn't want to dress In the
dark, thinking it was still n'glit, and so
I went to sleep again.
I got pretty
hungry at last, and that made me get
up. When does the next train leave
for Bangor? I want to get back to
God's country, where they have sun­
shine.’ ”
Mcsrev N.-ark O
®v®r
CANDY
CATHARTIC
F
would
AM BACK OF
IVIRY
' H
WATCBWOOr Olkts
t X
< SLICKED
\ on COAT
it NJ BDUl* THIS TRAPE NAM
f Í
\OWEJ?^
Mas. Amts Asros.
holds out the helping hand to you, and
wtll advise you without moMJ and
without price. Mrs. Pinkham's labora­
tory is at Lynn. Maas. Write a letter
there telling all your symptoms and
get the benefit of the greatest experi­
ence in treating female Illa
•' I was suffering to such an extent
from ovarian trouble that my physi­
cian thought an operation would be
necessary.
"Lydia K. Pinkham's Vegetable Com­
pound having been recommended to
ms, I decided to try it. After using
several bottles I round that I was
cured. My entire system was toned
up. and 1 suffered no more with my
ovaries."—Maa. Asu AsroM.Truy. Mo
I
0- 0
A
ON »L» trttnmt»»
.
V
Of ÍAHHVNTJ AHO "*U
’
**
Machinery, Implements,
Farm Supplies, Etc
An Error in Clusificstion.
ADVANCE THRESHER CO
Percy—Skitts is a sponge—a per­
fect sponge.
“Oh. no! When a sponge absorl«
anything, by Mpirezing it you can get
it again.
Mr. Eli Potts is a well known citi-
| zen of Waverly, Ohio, having been in
business there for 14 years. He is a
veteran of the Mexican war in which
he served with company II, of the
Fourteenth Tennessee regiment. At
the age of 76he bears the respect of
Genuine
all who know him and the following
experience, related by him, is raised
beyond all doubt by the high charact­
er of the narrator. He says:
“About seven years ago a disease
fastener! upon me which, as it devel­
oped, proved to be locomotor ataxia.
I became very nervous, could not walk
without having dizzy spells and did
not sleep well.
As the disease ad­
vanced I lost control of my muscles
and could only walk a shert distance.
I could not control the direction of
my steps and was always afraid oi
falling.
“This continued until the fall ol
1897 when there was a breaking down
of my entire system.
My stomach
was in bad condition and I suffered
greatly with kidney trouble caused by
being thrown out of a buggy.
“About two years ago I saw Dr.
Williams' Pink Pills for Pale People
advertised in a Cincinnati paper.
The case cured was similar to mine
and I gave the pills a trial.
Very
soon after I liegan taking them I ex­
perienced relief and, as the improve­
ment continued, I took the pills regu­
larly. Gradually the control of the
muscles was restored and my general
health improved. The dizzy feeling
left me and has never returned.
From my own experience I know that
Dr. Williams’ Pink Pills are a great
remedy and I am pleased to recom­
mend them to any one who suffers as
I did.”
' -
Signed.
ELI POTTS.
Subscribed and sworn to before me
Frank.
this 4th day of November, 1900.
Here we were set upon and beaten
W. R. A. Hayes,
with clubs.
A* Sh« Understood
Seal.
Notary Public.
“Murder!" cried Ardley. Impulsively.
Boston Girl—Have you
Dr. Williams’ Pink Pills for Pale
A subtle something told me be was son?
People may be obtained at all drug­ wrong.
St Louis Girl—No, I
gists or direct from Dr.. Williams
“You are college students, are you those red spots on my face •re
Medicine Co., Schenectady, N. Y., on not?” said I. addressing our assailants.
common pimples.
receipt of price, 50 cents per box; six
"We are,” said they, civilly.
boxes for |250.
“It Is as I thought,” said I, turning
to my companion. “This la not murder
An Old Inttrumtnt
at all. but a prank, merely!”
Violinist (proudly)—The instru­
Ardley was covered with confusion,
ment that I shall use at your house and vowed he should never forgive
tomorrow is over 2<X) years old.
himself, although the students, with
Parvenu—Oh, never mind!
It’s rare good breeding, affected to make
good enough. No one will know the light of It—Detroit Journal.
difference.
Halil* <*r**fe. Mtebljan
banlu|>
A»»»
Carter's
Little Liver Pills
CARTERS
An Old friend
RAILROAD AND LAWN FENCI?.
Writ* for l*rte*« ant (’•<• ogu*
The Portland Anchor Fence Co.
FARM
asssu S mhta **
9<>o D rops
Realism.
‘‘What Is that sound like a rainstorm
that I hear from tbe floor above?’’
Wireless Telegraphy on Atlantic.
"Why, that's our patent rain appara-
Professor R. A. Fessenden, with
aus. It's for the convenience and Mt-
tsfactlon of umbrella buyers who want his assistants, has installed a wireless
to test their purchases.’’—Cleveland telegraphy station not far from Caj>o
Ifatteras, off Roanoke inland, N. C.
Plaindealer.
An Amendment.
Negative Pams.
“The man who shoots ue out of sea­
“Well I see they are going to have
son Is to be fined.’*
a real naval arch. ’’
“Fined? Goodness, ma! If they real­
“What's the idea of that?”
ly want to stop it, why don’t they im­
“Oh, I supposfl it’s to comrnerorate
prison him for life or electrocute him?”
the way Dewey has been forgotten.’’
—Puck.
On tho Enemy’® Fire, of Coarse.
TMB SWIFT SPECIFIC COMPANY, ATLANTA, GA.
Nkotal St.. PORTLAND, Dragon.
For Infants and Children
ÄV^getabie I’reparalion for As
similal inß the Food and Regula
ting (he Sloinnchs and Bowls of
Promotes Digealion.Chrcrrul
this applies pa rticularly to medicine, an<LS. S. S., a remedy that has retained the
confidence of the people for nearly 50 years, must have merit—IT CUKES, is the
secret of its success. when you call for S. S. S.
don’t be persuaded to accept something else—
there is no substitute for S. S. S. It is the only ■
guaranteed purely vegetable blood purifier, and
the safest and best for all blood and skin
troubles. Do not let them force an inferior
1
1
I
mineral remedy on you because there is a larger
profit in it. If you have any blood or skin dis­
ease, don't hesitate to write us about it; our physicians will carefully consider
your c““ ***d advise you without charge. Book on Blood and Skin Diseases free.
-
A.J TOWEBCO BOflTON MA53. <
“I think the enemy has got our
range, captain,” said the officer of the
day.
“IIow In the world are we to cook our
dinner?” replied the captain, absent­
mindedly.—What to Eat.
Tbe groom may lead the bride to ths
altar—but bls leadership Is apt to end
there.
Every man Is sometimes what h<
should be at al) times.
Signature
new and R? m Contains neither
Opium.Morphine nor Mineral
N ot N arcotic .
■ r claim 'nt* mu J >1 £Nb»l^^
IL
t® RAIMA« r
If W.it,
BicKFoso.
w..hi®r»n, 0 c • it,.. »Ml *•' «*
II C.ÍVS quick repl I«®- 11
re I«»
30th Corp*. .‘ro®Mutlu| Slalm»»'11____ __
JOHN POOLS, Portland,
Foot of Morrison Strsst,
Aperfrrl Remedy for Constipa
Ron, Sour Stomach.Diarrhoea
Worms Lonvi i I sk ms ,Fe ven sh
nrss and L ohn of S leep .
Facsimile Signature of
NEW YORK
tXACT COPY or WRAPPER.
Can give you
Huggies. Plows.
Win.'mills an<l
Machinery. Bro
tbs best
Boiler, and
Pumps and
us lief"« buying-
i