TUESDAY. .TCLY 29. 1951
PACE SIX
HERALD ANT) NEWS. KLAMATH FALLS. nKTT,n
FRANK JENKINS
Editor
BILL JENKINS
Managing Editor
FLOYD WYNNE
City Editor
MAURICE MILLER
Circulation Mgr
Ph. TU 4-4752
By HAL BOYLE
NEW YORK UP Unlike many
professional comedians, H e n n y
Youngman doesn't discourage new
comers from trying to find a ca
tccr in the yuk. industry.
"People say 'cut out the com
edy' " he remarked. "But don't
believe them. There's a million
dollars in it if you can make
enough people laugh.
"In what other business can you
make a million dollars and carry
your inventory in your head?"
Youngman, celebrating his 23lh
year as a one-man gag factory,
has long been known in the trade
as one willing to help a talented
young beginner find his way
around.
What does it take to get started
as a comedian today?
"It was tougher in the old days,"
lie said. "The main thing you had
to have was a willingness to starve
while you hung around comics who
worked and learned how they did
it.
"Now nobody wants to starveithings done in an unoflicial way
anymore, not even beginners.
"The thing you need most today
Is wealthy parents, or a do-it-yourself
comedy kit consisting of
$50.0(10 in the bank.
"You start out by telling jokes
until you become the life of any
party you attend. Then someone
will tell you, 'You're a riot. You
ought to be on the stage.'
"After that you go to a diction
schooi and learn to talk with your
mouth full of marbles. Each day
you drop one marble. When you've
lost all your marbles, you'll be
a comic.
"Then you take your $50,000 out
of the bank and spend it buying
fresh jokes, costumes, building a
numher of routines, and finding
an agent. By the time you've
spent the $50,000 you should be
working or else you'll never
laugh again."
Henny has an unfair advantage
over most comedians. He was
born in Brooklyn. But he insists
he became a comic in self-delense.
"I was a fiddler in a dance
band, and a lousy one," he ad
mitted. "The couples used to make
comments on my playing as they
danced by, and I started to wise -
crack back. Things just went on
from there. I used my bow less
and less and my mouth more."
Henny is what is known us n
slandup comedian. They have one
of the toughest jobs in show busi
nessto go out cold on a stage,
without props or plot, and nuke
an audience of strangers laugh,
whether they want to or not. This
is an art which even Jackie Glen
son, one of the most astute situ
ation comedians of his day, has
never quite mastered.
Here are a few standby remarks
Henny uses to silence obstreper
ous women who try to get into the
act:
"Some women bring happiness
wherever they go. . . , But you
bring happiness whenever you go.
"If Moses had seen you, Ihere'd
have been another commandment.
"But you have to be careful in
squelching women." said Henny
"You try lo kid them, not murder
them.
"They might have a big escort
along."
Meeting Demi
Ry JAMES M.MII.OW
Associated Press News Analyst
WASHINGTON (APi The sum
mil meeting, which now look.
dead, was a mixed up moss be
fore it had a chance to start. This
is an explanation of how it was
shot before it was born.
Soviet Premier Khrushchev on
July 19 called for a summit meet
ing lo restore slahilily to the Mid
dle East. This was alter Ameri
can and British troops moved in
to Lebanon and Jordan at the re
quest of the heads of those gov
enunents. He called the Ainerican-Brilish
anion a threat to world peace.
He suggested the I'nitrd Stales,
the Soviet Union, Britain. France
and India lake part in Ihe meet
ing. The place? He proposed Ge
neva, Washington, anywhere.
By thus pulling the Soviet In
Inn in the role of peacemaker, he
gave the Soviets a propaganda
advantage. The West couldn't ig
nore it.
Ilrilish Prime Minister Harold
Macmillan agreed to Ihe meeting
July 22 but suggested it he held
In Ihe United Nations Security
Council in New York. And he
made a very important point:
He suggested that the big povv.
ers should not as is usual in the
Council vole on the problems
discussed, but rather that Ihcy try
In reach agreement without vot
ing (The United States. Britain.
France and Ihe Soviet Union hut
not India air permanent mem
bers of the Council They have
regular delegates sitting in for
them. If a summit meeting was
held in the Council the delegates
would Just turn their seals over
Entered as second class matter at the post olfice at Klamath Falls.
Ore., on August 20. 1396, under act of Congress. March 8. 1379
SERVICES:
ASSOCIATED PRESS UNITED PRESS
AUDIT BUREAU OF CIRCULATIONS
Serving Southern Orrgon And Northern California
to the heads of their govern
ments.l
II was widely reported the Ei
senhower administration wanted
no part of a summit meeting but
was pushed into reluctant agree
ment by the British. President
Kisenhower wrote a very angry
letter to Khrushchev. But, in ef
led, he appeared to agree with
out saying so flatly to a summit
meeting in the Council
But French Prime Minister
Charles de Gaulle didn't go along
with Mac-mill, and Eisenhower
He thought the big powers' dele
gates in the Council should con
tinue to try to reach some agree
ment on the Middle East, with a
summit conference held elsewhere
if it were needed
On July 23 Khrushchev shot
back a fast acceptance of the Ki
senhower Macmillan proposals
agreed to go to New York, and
agreed with Macmillan that the
meeting should try to reach agree
ments without voting.
He even suggested the heads of
government might be ahle to get
Which might mean: they could sit
in public in the Council for
while but do their real arguing
and agreeing behind closed doors
But he again proposed that In
dia sit in and that the Arab
states should take part in the (lis
cussion. Under Ihe Council rules
any U. N. member not on the
Council can ask to he heard in
any discussion involving its area.
Therefore, as de Gaulle later
pointed out, if the Arabs could
talk before the Council on the
Middle East, Israel, Turkey, Iran
and others would have the same
right.
If the discussion went further
Ihan Ihe Middle East, other na
tions would want to he heard. In
short, as he said, this would no
longer be just a summit meeting.
In fact, it could turn into a free
(or all.
On July 25 Eisenhower wrote
Khrushchcv another letter. He
added something which he hadn't
mentioned before. He said any
summit meeting in the Security
Council should he governed by
rules of the Council.
Presumably this meant voting.
which was just the opposite of
what Macmillan and Khrushchev
had talked of. Eisenhower went
further: before there was a sum
mil meeting in Ihe Council, he
said, the big powers' delegates
I here should work out arrange
ments for the conlerencc.
Macmillan went along with Ei
senhowerto the extent of saying
the delegates should make the
summit arrangements. But de
Gaulle still wouldn't go along. He
suggested a summit meeting lim
ited to the big powers somewhere
in Europe.
Khrushchev accused Eisenhow
er and Macmillan with their pro
posal that the delegates arrange
the meeting of trying to stall olf
any summit meeting nt all. He
said those same delegates have
been unable to agree on what lo
do about the Middle East.
And he switched from his
agreement to go lo New York.
Teaming up with de Gaulle's idea.
he proposed yesterday that Ihe
big powers meet in Europe.
The While House said Eisenhow
er slill slicks to his idea about
having Ihe meeting in the Secu
rity Council the way he proposed.
That about wraps it up.
liiMiriiiM'f l'n
By SAM DAWSON
AP Business News Analyst
NEW YORK lAPi-The insur
ance salesman is plying a Inn-way
street across our northern boun
dary. The busy linaneial Ihnrough
lare between Canada and Un
united States shows a trallic in-
Poqo
if t.tt'iO et APSbW isT 1 UNPATRIOTIC
C0N3SV AS', A LOT IS. y "PISt-OyAt
WVISTIGATI 1 CB'gv .tSt vv93g---
"jgy- "a h vl
wcw WC..0
f v.') .fo
nub
crease today in insurance as well
as in capilal investment.
Sales both here and there have
increased despite Ihe recession.
And life insurance policies of all
types foreign and domestic by
companies, savings banks, frater
nal and assessment organizations
and the government's veterans
kind now come to more than sno
billion dollars and involve 121 mil
lion Americans.
Canadian companies sold nearly
a billion dollars of life, insurance
lo Americans last year for a gain
of 90 million dollars over 1956.
U. R. companies peddled more
than l'i billion dollars in policies
lo our northern neighbors for an
increase . of almost 390 million
dollars.
The Canadians are particularly
strong at selling annuities to
Americans, U. S. salesman at sell
ing ordinary life policies.
But the recent spurt on the part
of American salesmen hasn't had
loo much effect yet on the over
all exchange of American and
Canadian dollars in premiums
and bcnelils, both of which are in
pretty close balance. This could
lie changed in Ihe future if the
American gains of the last two
years jell into a definite trend.
Capital investment by Ameri
cans in Canadian securities and
in development of Canadian re
sources has fretted some Canad
ians who lear it might lead to fi
nancial influence over Canada.
President Eisenhower and Prime
Minislcr Diefenbaker discussed
this trouble spot on the Presi
dent's recent visit there.
in tne case of the insurance
companies, however, total outside
investments arc still in favor of
Ihe Canadians. The 12 Canadian
companies doing business in this
country have invested l'i billion
dollars here. The 35 U. S. com
panies doing business in Canada
list less Ihan l'j billion dollars in
assets there.
Figures from America's Insti-
'te of Life Insurance and from
Ihe Canadian Life Insurance Offi
cers Assn. show that in 1957 the
12 Canadian companies had 199
million dollars in premium in
come Irom policies in force here,
while Ihe 35 U. S. companies gar
nered 191 million dollars from Ca
nadians. The Canadians' score on
nnnuily premiums was 46'j mil
lion dollars to the Americans' lO-U
million.
Both sides gained over 1!I5H
when Ihe Canadians took in 1H8'2
million dollars and the Americans
176'j million.
Canadian companies paid 1281;
million dollars in benefits to
Americans in 1957, nearly 17 mil
lion more than in 1956. Canadians
collected 127 million in benefits
from U.S. companies in 1957, or
20'j million more than in the
previous year.
All told. Americans now carry
fi'j billion dollars of Canadian
insurance and have sold Cana
dians 93 billion dollars worth.
I'liiou Huihliiig
By United Press Internal innal
Considering this was a six mil
lion dollar building they were
pretty quiet.
In fnrl, it was downright lonely
when a mild-looking, bespectacled
man ol 511 got up to speak. He was
James G. Cross president of the
Inlcrnal innal Bakery and Confec
tionary Workers Union, -recently
lo.ssed mil of the AFL-CIO and
he soon became responsible for
the understatement of fhe day.
Said Cross. "We didn't invite
many international unions here,
only our friends." A lew Team
ster Union olticinls, the only out
siders present, listened intently.
Ray Farkas, of United Press
International, loured this newest
and most expensive ol Washing-1
r cw cam y v. i r
A SAV I t.tCiO I'U.
f5v5. I CIVVA-O n,A
h PMAMfST . A V 9W CAS-T
DO t GOA
STAY
AWAKE.
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CARRIER
I MONTH $ i.
t MONTHS $ 9 00
1 YEAR - $18.00
MAIL
I MONTH $ 1.50
MONTHS $ 8.50
1 YEAR $15.00
ton's union homes. Let's go along
The first thing that strikes you
about this new building, the bak
ers have named it the "Solar Build
ing," is its utter simplicity and
neatness. "Like a million other
modern olfice buildings I've seen"
you say to yourself. And you're
right. This is nothing but a big.
modern olfice building. But there's
one distinguishing feature: the So
lar Building rises from what was
Washington's most sought-after
corner, 16th and "K" streets, two
blocks from the White House, and
across the street from the Statler
and Shcraton-Carlton hotels. ,
Another distinguishing feature-
office space in the baker's head
quarters costs almost $7 per
square foot the most expensive
footage a Washington tenant can
find.
The bakers and confectionary
workers use only the second and
third stories of the 13-floor build
ing. Their offices are modern and
functional and contain a complete
filing system on some $96,000 dues
paying members.
The II floors that are rented
spell a $3,000 a year profit for the
uninn-turned-landlord. And that
means clear profit after payment
on Ihe mortgage is made.
As you're walking out of the
Solar Building, you run into a sign
on a huge first floor office which
reads: "Bache and Company, and
other Brokers; Members of The
New Y'ork Stock Exchange."
Unions have changed.
All About Kain
The National Geographic So
ciety, which is an expert on prac
tically everything, comes up to
day with some little known facts
about the farmer's best friend.
Rain.
The society reports that scien
tists have been studying raindrops
through high-speed photography
and they've learned that rain
doesn't fall in tear-shaped drops
In fact, as rain falls, the drops
change form, from one shape
lo another and back again. These
oscillations take place about 16
times a second. And the shapes
lake on varied forms. The scien
lists have photographed raindrops
that look like telephones, dumb
bells, pancakes, hot dogs, ducks
and airplanes.
Rain itself is perpetual motion
machine. It's raining somewhere
on earth every second of the day.
For rain is powered by the sun.
The sun warms the water in the
sea or on land, causing it lo evap
orate. Then the warm air rises,
carrying a vapor to a point so
high that the vapor cools off and
condenses into tiny droplets, so
liny that a single raindrop is com
posed of as many as 10 million
droplets.
For that matter, a cloud is noth
ing but a mass of these droplets.
droplets loo small and light to
fall through Ihe air currents that
support them.
What science is trying to figure
out is what lakes place to squeeze
the droplets into actual raindrops.
The most common theory is that
rain is formed when some droplets
in a cloud arc bigger than others
Reing heavier, they fall through
Ihe air faster, and as they fall,
Ihey overtake smaller droplets.
This collision adds lo the drop
lets' size. They all fall faster
and linally leave Ihe cloud as
rain.
Thai's lor a normal rainstorm.
Meteorologists believe there's a
second process involving thunder
storms, that water vapor, when
it's carried very high. Ireezes into
ice. The ice pellets also collide
with droplets, grow in size and
are whirled about inside the lluin
dcrhead. As they swirl around,
they become large enough to fall
out ol the cloud. I'suallv. thev
melt before they hit the ground
as rain, if they don't melt, they
are called hail.
And this process is violent. A
single thunderstorm can generatr
many times Ihe energy of the big
gest atomic bomb.
United Press International
CKI1AII RAPIDS. Iowa-Eugene
Murphy whose wile gave birth to
their third set of twins in 27
monlhs. describing Ihe cumulative
cliect on Ins nerves:
"Occasionally I want to sit
down and shoot somebody."
BISMARCK. X D. - Police Mag
istrale I. M. Oseth imposing a
slilf fine of $.10 and lecturing him
self lor driving through a red
light:
"I telt I couldn't let invr'f gel
olf any easier than the people
lhat come hclore mo,"
NEW YORK An au'hurttatiw
source predicting that Manager
Walter Alston's davs as manager
are numbered unless thr baseball
Dodgers start winning in the next
ten days:
"That recent vole ol confidence
Ihe Dodgers gave Alston was tan
tamount to handing him his hat."
Expert Analyses Nikita's
Visit To United Nations
By LEON DENNEN
UNITED NATIONS. N Y. NEA1
Why is Nikita Khrushchev com
ing to the U N ?
Four major reasons are seen by
Western intelligence experts:
Moscow's uncertainty about its
so - called faithful ally," Red
China.
Kremlin second thoughts about
the Pan-Arab ambitions of Gamal
Abdel Nasser. President of the
United Arab Republic.
Khrushchev's fear that if Russia
gets into a shooting war his purged
but living enemies, Georgi Malen
kob, V. M. Molotov and Georgi
Zhukov might stage a comeback.
Continued tension and unrest in
the Red-dominated countries of
Eastern Europe.
Khrushchev undoubtedly believes
lhat a new period of international
"cooling off" such as followed the
1955 Geneva conference would help
on all these scores.
Khrushchev has an immense
slock of old Russian proverbs so
he undoubtedly knows the one that
goes: "You must measure your
cloth seven times before you cut
once." He must have measured
the Middle East situation at least
seven times before deciding to
make an historic visit to New York.
A consumate actor, Khrushchev
may be expected to play the as
sured, confident leader of "vic
torious Communism" lo the hilt
while under the kleig lights of
world publicity. But analysts be
lieve his ham acting may conceal
some nagging worries.
Red China is becoming increas
ingly the No. 1 headache in Mos
cow. It is significant that while
Khrushchev demanded summit
seals for India's Nehru and the
Arab leaders he made no mention
of his Asian brother, Mao tse
Tung. He has also turned a cold
shoulder on Mao's ofler of Chinese
volunteers for Ihe Middle East.
Mao forced Khrushchev's hand
recently by attacking Yugoslav-
President Marshal Tito in terms
that made any compromise be
tween Moscow and Belgrade im
possible. In doing so he launched an out
cry against what the Communists
call revisionism. Revisionism
again became the arch crime in
the Soviet hook and in this at
mosphere there followed the shock
ing execution of Hungary's two
wouid-ne revisionists. Imre Nagy
ann Gen. rat Alaleter.
Having given Khrushchev vital
support in his purge of Malenkov,
Molotov and Zhukov. the Red China
leader now wants the Kremlin to
dance to his tune. Unrecognized
by the U.S., barred from the U.N..
Red China sees everything to gain
and nothing to lose by halting any
drift of Russia toward compromise
with the West. She does not wish
to he alone in isolation.
Moscow has been playing a dou
ble game in the Orient, giving Mao
substantial help toward industriali
zation hut shooting a great deal
of assislance toward non - Rerij
Asians a steel mill to India, war
materials to Egypt and Syria, road
building equipment to Afghanistan,
for example.
The Russians are keenly aware
thai their population is only a third
as large as that of Red China,
and that China's is increasing by
approximately 15.000,0(10 a year or
twice as fast as Russia's.
Whatever economic aid Moscow
gives Peiping this brings nearer
the day when the Chinese Com
munists, despite their prolessions
of undying loyalty, will dominate
their Russian ally.
Russia has been in no hurry to
give Kcd cnina atomic weapons.
Nevertheless. Western experts be
lieve Chinese scientists are no
more than a year away from hav
ing their first atomic device on
their own.
And now as to the second point.
there are reasons to believe that
the Kremlin has new doubts as
lo the future attachments of Nas
ser. Whv, they must ask themselves.
did Nasser recently run off to hud
dle Willi Tito, Moscow's avowed
No. 1 enemy? Cairo and Moscow
have nothing to wed them except
common hostility toward t h e
West and Israel. There is no solid
ground lor belief that Nasser, with
his ambition for a great Arab
state cutting across Russia's south
ern borders like a scimitar, will
play the Communist game.
So. hefore backing .Nasser in anv
gamble. Khrushchev must care
fully weigh Ihe size of the risks
and inevitably he must decide that
some are worth taking, just as
some are not.
What about Ihe loyally of the
Red Army should Russia become
involved in a major war with the
Wesr.' As recently as June 27.
Rod Star, mouthpiece of the Soviet
Armv. printed a front page edi
torial pleading with the armed
4
Only about 46 calories per slice
Mtd fhtivfT
JILL ST. JOHN "t n
"SUMMER LOVE"
A llm(ul-l"lril'0"l fturt
FLUHRER'S
forces to maintain "harsh internal
discipline."
This could be an appeal to the
partisans of Marshal Zhukov in
the Soviet army and navy, in the
view of some Western observers.
Despite Khrushchev's frantic ef
forts to produce more lood and
consumer goods, tension within
Communist society is constantly in
creasing. The murders of Nagy
and Maleter are clear evidence of
the desperation to which he has
been reduced.
Khrushchev still remembers
even if the West seems to have
forgotten that in 1956 both the
Hungarian and Polish Communist
paties revolted against Russian
control.
Khrushchev stands only to gain
prestige and propaganda by
participating at a U.N. summit
meeting in which the U.S. and
Britain will be the accused "im
perialist aggressors" while Soviet
Russia will act as the accuser.
By now the free world should
be familiar with the Janus face of
Nikita Khrushchev. He can order
the murder of a Nagy or a Maleter
to gain political advantage. But
he can also appear smiling, rea
sonable and witty when it suits
his purposes.
U.S. Secretary of State John Fos
ter Dulles considers Khrushchev a
narrow, self-indulgent and emotion-
man who acts first and thinks
They'll Do It Every Time
NOW LOOK.VOO 6UYS
an rJUDJlftM Ml IC-r
NO FOOLIN' GROUND.'
NO LUNCH NO NOTHIN .' WE GOTT4
make THIS DE4DLINE .
Ihem HE TAKES
ROOT AUD SH00T5
the bf?eeze
All morning,
holding up
the wheels
of progress-
THAMX 4ND 4
TIP OP THE
H4TLO M4T
1vEMBP4MDT d.
eltklAi.y v
TEX4S
Investment
Money Sought
NEW YORK (AP)-Ghana is
seeking investment capital, not
direct grants, its Prime Minister
says.
The African leader. Dr. Kwame
Nkrumah, said the investment
capital is needed for a 300-million-dollar
development program. The
investments will be repaid, he
said.
He spoke at an official citv
luncheon in his honor.
Last night the New York Cocoa
Exchange gave Nkrumah a din
ner in his honor. At it, the Negro
Prime Minister discussed Ihe eco
nomic problems of his lfi-month-old
country and its key crop,
cocoa.
He said Ghana, which normally
produces almost .10 per cent of the
world's cocoa supply, will contin
ue to give the crop absolute prior
ity. DIDN'T DO BIGHT
NEW ORLEANS lUPD Police;
charged Louis Icard, .12, with car
rying a concealed weapon. He ad
mitted he had been looking "for a
heroin peddler to rob." "I'm going I
to keep on holding up dope pod-!
Icrs. 'cause they ain't dnin'l
right.' " police 'quoted the accused.!
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MAO AND KHRUSHCHEV:
later. But Khrushchev's perilous
climb to power in Ihe Kremlin has
shown he can also be calculating.
Thus, while the Soviet ruler makes
no secret of the fact that he
would like to "bury" the U.S.,
he also will try to exploit his
isit to New York to win friends
and influence people. He tried it
- JLL1VIE JRT FOR THIS V'
dr ouicuers Dy -riiifiUT V
FULL STEflM AHEAD.'
X1L NEVER FOR&ET4 RUSH
OUT ONE T1ME-H4-H4-X LETTERED IN,
THE N4ME WR0N6 NOBODY EVER NO
TICED IT TILL IT W4S ON THE BILL-
baakDS-THEN IN I936 - - NO -
WITH KD.D. AUD Q. WELL-THEy
HV TMm . lll-r . I rr
LIGHTNING HITS CVS
FORT JACKSON, S. C. (UPD
Five Fort Jackson trainees were
hospitalized Monday after they
were struck by lighlning at the
fort's rifle range. Another trainee
was sent back to his company for
duty following the incident during
a thunderstorm. The five hos
pitalized men were reported in
good" condition.
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69
New troubles for old somrades?
when he visited Great Britain
while he was still in partnership
with former Premier Nikolai Bul
ganin though without much suc
cess. He was more successful in
India and Burma.
So he has decided: "Why not
put on the charm also for the gul
lible Americans?"
By Jimmy Hatlo
SuLLGF?4vy
L4ID DOWM
THE LAW TO
HIS RTOEPT.
THEy HAD TO'
ET OUT THE
WORK OR
ELSE.'.'
1
JOB I GOT
37 - - I WENT
LIKED
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with Gifts & Greetings
from Friendly Business,
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On the occasion of:
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Engagement
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Arrival of Newcomers to
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